The Alpha and his Mate

Annabelle’s POV

What the hell happened? Was my first thought when I came to after passing out.

Why had I passed out again?

I frowned and squinted my eyes as a dull headache started to form behind my eyes brows. I looked to my right, hoping to find out what time it was, but when my eyes caught the sight of the closed curtains I realised that it was no longer light out. A bedside lamp had been left on beside me but that was all that lit the room as I looked around for any information that would explain what happened to me.

I panicked for a second, not knowing where I was, but as I started to take in more of my surroundings, I started to recognise the room as Jax’s. Had something happened to him earlier? I had the weirdest feeling that something had happened with him last night.

I frowned again and rubbed my forehead as the concentration was causing my headache throb uncomfortably. I went to get up and try to find Jax, but when I heard muffled voices from behind the door I froze. Who was that?

“But why would her wolf do that to her?” I recognised that as Jax’s voice, but why was he yelling? And who was he yelling at?

“I don’t know Alpha; my guess is that seeing you in your other form triggered her wolf somehow. I will have to do some research on this type of Alpha control, but my guess is that because she left the packs territory the command is somehow having less effect on her. Adding to that seeing you in your wolf form for the first time, her wolf must’ve been trying to escape and shift, but the human side of her is still subconsciously following the command.”

“Well how the hell do we break the command?” Jax growled, the sound feeling like it could shake the walls around me. He was so angry, just like Tony or Natalie when they didn’t get their way.

I whimpered slightly as memories started to flood back into my brain. Memories of them yelling at me for there being no beer in the house, for not organising the jewellery box the way it should. I whimpered again as I held my head in my hands, praying for the flashbacks to stop.

All of a sudden it became very quiet outside the bedroom door, as if they could hear the internal turmoil I was currently suffering through.

“Thank you doctor, you are dismissed” Jax suddenly said, in a slightly calmer voice that before.

“Alpha” was all she replied with before I heard her footsteps retreat back down the stairs and out the front door.

The next thing I knew the bedroom door was slowly being pushed opened as Jax poked his head through. I smiled for a second, trying to show him that I was okay, but when I made contact with those big brown eyes of his everything came back to me. The story he had told me about the Moon goddess, him standing by the tv as he started taking his clothes off and finally, him shifting into a giant black wolf.

I whimpered again as the memory consumed my brain, making me watch him shift over and over again like a rerun. I froze in my whimpering as I watched the shimmering gold of his wolf slightly swirl into his eyes, mixing with his normal chocolate brown colour.

I hadn’t realised I had moved up the bed and away from him until I saw the hurt and sadness flash through his eyes. I felt bad for making him feel like that, but at the same time I couldn’t help it.

He quickly brushed his feelings aside though and in a blink of an eye he was back to the happy and caring Jax I had grown accustomed to. Even when he was hurt he was trying to make me feel more at ease.

“It’s okay Annabelle” Jax muttered as he took a step towards me with his arms raised, as if he was approaching a wild animal. I smiled slightly at the irony of the situation we were in, if anyone was the wild animal around here, it was him.

“Do you remember what I told you in the car earlier Annabelle?” He asked as he took another step towards me and my heart stuttering as he got closer, my irrational fear starting to get the better of me again. I nodded slightly, indicating that I remembered exactly what he had told me. In fact, it was the only thing that had kept me from running for the hills in the first place.

My response brought a slight smile to Jax’s lips as he relaxed his shoulders ever so slightly, looking almost relieved that I remembered. “Can you tell me what I told you?” He pressed.

“You...you won’t hurt me” I stuttered. My heart desperately wanting to believe him, but my brain still needed convincing.

His smile widened even further as he crouched down by the side of the bed, I hadn’t even realised he’d gotten this close to me until he was sitting almost eye level with me. “That’s right Annabelle, I could never hurt you. I could never hurt the one person who makes my life worth living” he stated.

I blushed at his comment and looked down, not knowing how to take it. When you’ve been told most of your life that you were worthless, and you’d never amount to anything in life, it’s hard to accept compliments. The worst part through, was that I actually believed them, those hateful comments that the Leftens would spew at me when they felt like putting me down. I mean I obviously had to have done something horrible in the past to be treated in such a way so maybe... maybe I did deserve everything the Leftens had done to me.

I suddenly felt the bed dip slightly and looked up to see Jax sitting at the foot of the bed, close enough to touch me if he reached out, but not close enough for there to be accidental touching.

“Do you also remember what happened earlier?” He asked, obviously wary about approaching the subject again after seeing my initial reaction.

I nodded before looking down at my fingers, “I r-remember everything” I whispered.

“So you remember about the story I told you, about the Moon Goddess and mates and w-werewolves?” He stuttered.

I nodded my head slowly, relieved that my headache was slowly starting to fade.

“D-do you remember anything else Annabelle? Anything about me?” He questioned; hesitation clear in his voice.

I nodded again but still remained silent, unable to say the words out loud, that he had changed into a wolf before my very eyes. Instead I decided to go in a different direction. “Why did my head hurt?” I whispered, not sure about whether I actually wanted to know the answer but knowing that I needed to.

Jax sighed and ran his hand through his hair, “Well the doctor and I have a theory about that actually. Come downstairs with me and I will make you some hot chocolate whilst we talk, how does that sound?”

I smiled at the mention of hot chocolate and vigorously nodded my head in agreement, making Jax laugh at my ecstatic expression.

“So you like hot chocolate then” he said with a nod, as if he was storing the information away somewhere special in his brain.

I just shrugged and held my hands out, ready for him to pick me up and walk me into the kitchen. I could definitely walk by now; all the cuts and scrapes had healed over enough so that it didn’t cause me too much pain to put weight on them, I just didn’t want to waste a chance of getting close to him.

He smiled a toothy grin at me when he realised what I was wanting and quickly came to pick me up in his arms, eager to have me close to him again.

“I’m so glad you aren’t scared of me little mate; I don’t know what I would’ve done if you were” he muttered and I swear I heard him ever so slightly sniff my hair.

As he sat me down on the kitchen counter, just like earlier, we fell into a comfortable silence as Jax started to get the ingredients together ready for a hot chocolate.

“Do you like cinnamon in it or not?” He asked.

I shrugged my shoulders, not really knowing how I liked it.

He frowned “you have had hot chocolate before... right?”

I shook my head before shrugging again, the Leftens always said I was never worthy of something as nice as chocolate. They always loved getting me to make it though, another form of torture and making me inferior to them no doubt.

Jax mumbled something under his breath before turning around to get together the cream and marshmallows. “Well you’re in for a treat then because my hot chocolates are the best of the best” he declared as he started to heat milk in a saucepan over the hobs. “My secret is plenty of sugar and chocolate smarties on top” Jax whispered, as if he was telling me some big secret.

I giggled at him and nodded in understanding before pretending to lock my lips with my thumb and finger, as if I was telling him his secret was safe with me.

Jax laughed back with his eyes shining before turning back to the mixture that he proceeded to pour into two mugs once he had deemed it hot enough. One for me and one for him. Once he’d done that he plopped in some mini marshmallows, squirted loads of cream on top, and then finished it off with chocolate shavings, smarties, chocolate sauce and more mini marshmallows with a cinnamon stick coming out of it. It was like a sugar overload.

“Voila, my masterpiece” he said in a weird Italian accent which I couldn’t help but giggle slightly at.

I clapped at his creation before wrapping my arms around his neck as he carried me into the living room, settling me back down into my seat on the sofa. When he came back with our drinks, we both got comfortable on the sofa next to each other and I took my first sip. Safe to say it was probably the most incredible thing I had ever tried.

“Do you like it?” Jax asked as he saw my eyes light up at the taste.

I smiled and nodded my head enthusiastically before taking another sip.

“Well don’t tell doctor Tessler I gave you that alright? Hot chocolate is definitely not on the list of things you should be having yet” he laughed.

I nodded again but otherwise ignored him as I took another sip of the sugary drink. I couldn’t even remember the last time I had something that was this good. Everything was blended so perfectly together I couldn’t help but moan slightly at the taste.

“Annabelle could I ask you something?” Jax asked, suddenly looking slightly nervous.

I nodded my head, not really listening to him as most of my focus was on the hot cup of deliciousness currently clutched in between my palms.

“Okay umm... I don’t really know how to go about this so here goes...have you met your wolf yet?”

I froze as I was about to take another sip. “My...my what?” I stuttered, unsure if I had heard him right.

“Your wolf” he repeated, staring at me expectantly.

“I...Umm...what?” Was he serious, did he actually think I had some wolf stashed somewhere or something?

“Your wolf Annabelle, up here” he said and pointed to his temple. He had a wolf in his brain? I mean I guess that could make sense seeing as he is a werewolf and all, but why did he think I had one, I wasn’t a werewolf.

I just stared at him in confusion and he sighed, was that the wrong answer to his weird question?

“Annabelle do you remember the story I told you, about how the Moon Goddess would gift a werewolf with a mate, to help calm their wolf side?”

I nodded, of course I remembered, how could I forget Jax turning into a huge black wolf before my very eyes in the middle of the living room? “Well... to help keep her species alive the Moon Goddess decided that werewolves could only have mates who were also werewolves...do you get where I’m going with this?” He asked, obviously struggling with his words a little. I so desperately wanted to nod and say that I did understand, but if I was being honest I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about. I shook my head and he sighed, running his hands through his hair.

“Okay let’s try this a different way” he muttered more to himself then to me. “What is it that I call you?”

“What?”

“What do I call you Annabelle, what do I call you when I don’t use your name”.

I thought for a second before responding in a whisper “your little mate”.

He smiled “exactly, you’re my little mate Annabelle, my mate.”

He was looking at me expectantly, but all I could do was stare at him in shock, I was his mate? “No...no that’s not right” I stuttered “you said that- that the Moon Goddess d-doesn’t pair up a werewolf with a human. You just said that... right now” I stuttered.

He shook his head and leaned towards me so that we were nearly touching. “She doesn’t” was all he replied with.

I frowned “but that doesn’t make sense...that would mean that I’m a... that I can...” I didn’t know how to finish that sentence, was he being serious? Did he really believe that I was a werewolf like him?

I looked into his eyes, and saw nothing but trust and determination in them, nothing to hint that he was lying.

I stared at him in shock and all of a sudden I couldn’t breathe properly, like I couldn’t get enough oxygen into my lungs. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and my hands started to uncontrollably shake. This can’t be happening... this can’t be real I muttered to myself over and over. I could hear my blood rushing through my ears and my stomach was filled with so many butterflies I felt like I was going to be sick.

Jax was quick to take the hot chocolate out of my hands before it spilled and placed it on the coffee table in front of us, taking my shaking hands in one of his as he placed his other hand on my cheek. “Deep breaths for me little mate, it will soon fade” he reassured me in a calm voice.

The sound of his soothing voice plus the warmth he was generating through his hands into mine helped calm my nerves and before long my breathing had gone back to normal and the butterflies had disappeared.

“Better?” He asked and I nodded my head as I looked up into his chocolate eyes.

“How...?” My voice wavered as I tried to formulate a sentence.

Jax sighed as he got comfortable on the sofa, pulling me into his arms so that my head was resting on his chest. I could hear the steady beat of his heart, causing me to breath easy. It was as if my heart was matching his beat for beat they were so in sync.

“The doctor and I have a theory about the how, we didn’t want it to be true but it’s beginning to look more and more likely. It’s one of the worst things an Alpha could do to someone in their pack ” he sighed.

I gazed up at him expectantly, but he was just staring into space with his eyes glazed over.

“An Alpha has complete control over his pack” he said, obviously deciding the best way to describe what is going on with me was through another story type thing. “He decides what happens and what doesn’t happen with everything involving his pack or territory. One of the traits an Alpha has is the ability to bend will, for example if a pack member is being disrespectful to the Alpha then that Alpha can bend the pack members will to submit to him. It’s one of the reasons Alphas are so powerful” he explained.

“There are certain unspoken rules regarding this ability to bend will, for example forcing someone to do something they don’t want to do, making them commit a crime...” he pauses for a moment, as if he was gathering his thoughts and I quickly squeezed his hand reassuringly, urging him to continue.

He smiled down at me before taking a breath and ran his hand through his hair. “One of the worst things an Alpha could do is force someone not to shift. Placing that command on someone who has already turned sixteen and had already shifted is bad enough but at least they have already shifted and so have their wolf with them. Placing the command on someone who hasn’t yet shifted though is seen as one of the worst things an Alpha could possibly do to person. It stops their wolf even coming to the surface and so that person can never shift, never meet their wolf. It’s like ripping a part of someone away from them. What’s worse is that because that person hasn’t met their wolf, their wolf is not there to help recognise their mate, without a person’s wolf they will never know who their mate is.”

I looked up at him again to see him staring down at me in sadness “Annabelle we believe that that’s what has happened to you, your Alpha must’ve placed the command on you at a very young age if you don’t remember it.”

I frowned and looked at my hands as I picked at my nails. Could he be right? Could I really have a wolf trapped in my head somewhere, unable to get out because of some command put on me at as young child?

“How can you be so sure I’m your mate if you can’t feel my wolf?” I asked, not knowing if I wanted the answer or not.

He kissed the top of my head and my stomach did a little flip. “I can feel her Annabelle, she’s hidden away but she’s there, tucked away in a corner of your brain. All you need to do is let her out” he said with a soft smile before burying his nose in my hair. “Even if I couldn’t feel her I’d still know you were mine, your scent alone would draw me to you, the smell of strawberries and vanilla. It’s so intoxicating I could breathe it in all day and if I could bottle it up I would.”

I blushed at what he was saying, did I really smell of strawberries and vanilla? How would someone even smell like that?

“And even without your smell I’d know you were mine, just from a simple brush of my hand on yours. The electricity between our fingertips would light my wolf on fire and instantly let me know that you were mine, just as much as I am yours.”

He slowly started to trail his fingers up my arm and I frowned at the lack of this electricity he was talking about, only feeling the smallest amounts of tingles.

He smiled at me sadly as I looked up at him in confusion. “It’s because you haven’t met your wolf yet, once you do you’ll feel the exact same thing I’m feeling right now” he muttered with gold slightly swirling in his eyes, showing me his wolf was coming through.

“When?” I asked, desperate to meet her so that I could experience these amazing things that Jax was talking about.

He just shrugged at me “that’s completely up to you and how much you want to meet her. You are no longer under your Alphas control since you ran away and left his territory and so it’s all up to you as to when you shift.”

“You’re an Alpha, can’t you just command me to shift?” I asked.

He smiled before shaking his head, “unfortunately I can’t, it would probably do more harm to you than good because then you’d have two opposing Alphas commands rattling around in that pretty little head of yours. It would rip you and your wolf in two trying to follow both of them. You need to break through the command on your own”.

I huffed, not liking the answer he just gave me and crossed my arms.

He just laughed at my little tantrum and hugged me tighter to him. “You’ve done the hardest part so now all that’s left to do is just to practice” he said as he continued to chuckle at me.

I frowned “What hard bit?”

“Shifting for the first time, when we found you in the woods you were in your wolf form, I mean I’m guessing that it was your first shift seeing as you don’t know anything about being a werewolf.”

“I shifted?” I gasped, so confused as to why I didn’t remember it.

He nodded and smiled at my shocked face “still believe you aren’t a werewolf?” He smirked.

I remained silent, slowly digesting all the information he has just given me.

“You were the most beautiful golden coloured wolf I had ever seen, similar to your hair colour, but with just a hint more gold in it. You were unconscious by the time I got there but you were absolutely stunning...still are” he whispered as he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

I blushed as I looked down but he took my chin in his hand and gently lifted my head up so I was looking into his eyes. “You are beautiful Annabelle, don’t ever forget that” he whispered.

I stared into his eyes, speechless...how do you respond to something like that, when you’ve been told all your life that you were worthless and ugly.

Jax must have noticed that I was starting to feel uncomfortable as he quickly kissed my forehead before changing the subject. “That’s why you can heal so fast you know” he stated.

I frowned at him, what did he mean?

“Being a werewolf, that’s how you manage to heal so quickly. What, did you think it was completely normal to dislocate your elbow and then for it to be perfectly fine the next day?” He chuckled.

I just shrugged, I had never really given it much thought if I was being honest, it explains why I managed to survive all the beating I had received through the years though. Not many people could break their leg and then walk on it just fine a few days later.

“Anyway, enough of the serious talk for tonight, we can do more of that tomorrow, but now I think that it’s time for some dinner for you” he stated as he got up with me still in his arms.

If I was being completely honest, I was still stuffed from the half cup of hot chocolate I had just had but I didn’t want to upset him so I just nodded my head with a slightly forced smile as he walked me into the kitchen.