In My Desperate Time

Why there is so much blood? I am shocked.
“Your hand... Lots of blood.” I say lamely.
“I want you.”
Ignoring my words, he pushes me against the door, his whole body presses mine., his hot breath gushing on my face with the
nice smell of wine.
I don't like men getting drunk, because it feels like they stink. But why? Frances Louis smells so good.
The light in the room is dim, and Frances Louis’s eyes are burning like fire, which could melt me at any moment.
“Did...did you drink?”
I swallow, shrink back, and say nervously.
“Yes.” Frances Louis answers softly and looks at me with deep eyes.
I was going to say something to ease the tension, but it seems even more awkward.
Frances Louis knows why I come here, or he wouldn't be waiting for me at home. But he doesn’t mention it, and I couldn't say it,
either.
I have vowed solemnly that I would never be his mistress, but only two days later, I send myself to his house.
I think I'm a joke. Those pride and self-respect, now all become my laughing stock.
His fiery kisses come over me, and I can’t resist. I can only let his tongue invade my mouth with the smell of alcohol.
Hot, so hot.
This time, I am not drugged, but my body, is still so hot.
Steven Song is right. I can’t resist a.
But now there is no way for me to turn back.

His hands stroke my hair and then, all the way down, stop at my chest and rub vigorously, leaving the blood with warm breath on
my skin.
My heart skips a beat.
I pull back instinctively, says shyly, “no... don’t.”
“Why don’t?” He stops, putting his head on my neck and says with a smile.
My words stuck in my mouth and I couldn't speak.
I send myself to him. It would be too pretentious to say no now.
It is my own choice, and I have to accept it.
I close my eyes and say nothing.
My body is trembling because of nervousness.
Suddenly, I am lifted up in the air.
I open my eyes. Frances Louis picks me up and go straight upstairs.
I clutch the hem of his shirt, but I couldn't hold the tension down. I catch the wrinkles out of his shirt, which is not in keeping with
Frances Louis's usual dapper appearance.
He holds me into the room and directly put me on the big bed, then his strong body press on mine.
“Jane Noyes, I know you're coming.” Frances Louis whispers.
His words make me sure that all of this is the result of his premeditation.
“Frances Louis, did you set this up?” I stare at him, unable to say my suspicion out.
“What?” He smiles lightly, seems not knowing what I am talking about.
But I know very well that he is playing the fool.

I want to ask more questions, but his body come up, one hand rubbing my softness, and the other hand begins to untie my
clothes skillfully.
His hands are cool, but his lips are hot, falling on my hot skin.
I feel so nervous.
Frances Louis says that he didn’t touch me before, that is to say, my first time is still there.
Perhaps, only my hymen has some value, which gives me a bit of bargaining capital.
I make myself become a commodity; it is really sad.
His kisses fall on every part of me like the heavy rain, all the way down to the most sensitive place. Both hands are not idle,
rubbing in my sensitive place.
I hear his breathing become heavy. My body gradually soften down because of his teasing, and the shame liquid also flows out
from my private part.
When the time is right, Frances Louis comes up and pushes himself forward, stretching all over my body.
“Pain...”
The pain makes my whole-body tense and my sensitive part shrinks.
“You...”
Frances Louis stares at me for a long time before he says, “is this your first time?”
Yes.
It’s my first time.
I believe that Frances Louis has made a thorough investigation of my situation, but he certainly doesn’t know that a woman who
has been married for six months can still be a virgin.
That’s why he shows an unexpected expression.
I say nothing. In other words, I am too sore to speak.

I've heard people say it hurts the first time. But I don’t expect that it would be so painful like this.
So far, even Frances Louis's movements have stopped. But his big organ staying inside still pains me.
The next second, however, I hear Frances Louis sneer and say, “how can you still be a virgin? Now going to the hospital and
repairing the hymen doesn’t cost much money.”
His words, like a pot of cold water, pour me over.
Although the hymen is not a rare thing now, what he said still makes my heart aching.
In the eyes of Frances Louis, I am such a person.
I want to explain.
But I feel that the explanation is redundant. Woman will bleed the first time. We will see if I'm lying or not later.
I smile and say nothing.
Frances Louis's face darkens. Not waiting me to get used to it, he continues to move inside my body.
I bite my lips tightly so that I wouldn't cry by this humiliation. Like an unconscious marionette, I heave with the movements of
Frances Louis.
Waves after waves of pleasure sweep over me. I, like a lost boat in the deep sea, float and sink, but can never reach the shore.
His movements overwhelm me like a storm and make me indulged in.
It takes a long time for Frances Louis to release at the deepest part of my body, filling me up completely.
And I am as limp as a puddle of mud, lying on the bed and having no strength to turn over.
He pulls away from me, sits down on the edge of the bed, putting on his trousers. He looks at me in the bed, and laughs.
“When I find you, I didn't expect you to be a virgin. But you make up such a bad joke and treat me like a fool?”
His eyes fell on me as he carelessly deals with the wound in his hand. I support myself up and look at the place where we united
so intimately before, and I am stunned.
The sheet is clean and free of impurities.

Even the seed he has just sown are still in me, not a drop of it flowing out.
God may have played a big joke on me. I feel so painful just now, but there is no blood on the bed.
Frances Louis' disdainful and sarcastic eyes, like a sharp knife, obliterate my dignity.