Good Elf Gone Wrong: A Holiday Romantic Comedy

My family was in the dining room, hyping up for the hockey game as I served breakfast.

While my brother ate a slice of the monster ham-cheese-onion-and-spinach omelet, Piper was carefully painting a Rudolph on his cheek.

On the other side of the dining room, James, with team Frosty, was whining to Kelly that she hadn’t washed his jersey.

“Don’t be so hard on her,” I said brightly, whisking away empty plates and topping off orange juice. “Kelly doesn’t know how to use the washing machine. My mom does her laundry.”

“Yes, I do! You didn’t ask me,” Kelly snapped at him.

“Hudson didn’t have to ask me to wash his clothes last night,” I said, barely able to contain my shit-eating grin. “I washed his things to be a good girlfriend.”

Yes, friends, your girl was officially not a virgin. The world was brighter, happier, and I felt taller, more confident, if not a little bit sore.

Pugnog raced to the front door. Hudson came in from his run.

“You were out running? You need to save yourself for the big game,” my uncles cried, hurrying over to him.

“It was only a few miles. It’s just a little warm-up,” Hudson said as he was draped in towels and handed a kale smoothie. The blender was the morning’s hockey reveille.

Hudson smiled at me and wrapped his free arm around my waist for a sweaty kiss.

“Just a little warm-up,” Uncle Eddie declared. “This guy is our ringer.”

“He’s got that big dick energy,” Kelly called, earning an ugly look from James.

Hudson’s mouth quirked.

“You want some pancakes?” I offered.

“No.” My uncles booed. “No carbs. Protein only.”

“You trying to sabotage the game, Gracie?” My brother Logan threw a fork at me.

Hudson was ushered to the place of honor.

“No one has even seen him play,” James protested.

“I have,” I said. “He’s pretty good.”

“Pretty good? That’s not what you said last night,” Granny Murray hollered.

That earned me another self-satisfied grin from Hudson.

“He needs to wear a shirt at the table,” my mom scolded me.

“Nah,” her younger brother said affectionately and started doing rapid karate chops on Hudson’s massive shoulders. “Gotta loosen him up.”

“I think Gracie got that covered last night too,” Granny Murray whooped.

Hudson followed me into the kitchen and pulled me in for another hot kiss.

“Do you want to loosen me up in the locker room before the big match?”

“I don’t usually go to the games,” I said.

Hudson stared at me. “You’re not going to the hockey game?”

“I have to make lunch.”

“You have three coolers of food loaded in the back of my truck,” he said flatly.

I squirmed. “I usually just stay home.”

“That’s a problem for me,” he murmured, pulling me closer to him. “Because I want you there.” He wrapped his bare arms around me. “So you need to be there.”

“It’s just a family holiday game.” I wiggled against him.

“I know it’s going to make you all hot and bothered to see me on the ice, and I like fucking after I play.” He kissed my mouth.

“In that case.”

If I actually cared about my revenge plan, I’d tell him that it was a perfect moment to get the fuel we needed for the nuclear-level explosion at Kelly and James’s marriage.

But there was that fluttering in my chest again.

“Sure.” I smiled up at him. “I’ll go to the game.”

“Bloood!” Granny Murray bellowed as Hudson and my uncle crashed into each other on the ice. “Slit his throat!”

“Gran. That’s your son.”

The elderly woman blew a raspberry. “I have three more sons just like him. Kill him, Hudson! Fight fight fight! We paid good money to be here. I need a viral TikTok video.”

Hudson did some sort of jujitsu hockey move, then he was flying down the ice with the puck.

He passed it to my brother, who shot it back, then Hudson scored on the goal. My male relatives on his team went wild.

“That man is a machine,” my aunt Stacy remarked, pouring everyone fresh rounds of the Christmas cranberry vodka cocktails I’d made.

“I hope he doesn’t hurt someone,” my mother fretted as Hudson stole the puck away from my dad, sending him reeling on the ice.

“If he didn’t break Gracie apart,” Granny Murray stated, “then Rob should be okay. Unfortunately.”

It did look a little dicey. My family was on the shorter side. Hudson with his huge six-foot-five frame, dwarfed the other players.

He was careful, however. Even though he was focused on the game, he was still fully aware of what was going on around him and was gentle with my smaller, younger cousins, even tossing the puck to Dakota’s littlest brother on occasion so he could take a shot at the goal.

“I see you,” Dakota hissed in my ear, making me yelp in surprise.

“Hudson is not husband material.”

My ovaries very much disagreed.

“Scooore!” Aunt Janet announced on the sound system.

“Logan got a goal!” Piper cheered.

“Hudson set him up to score,” Kelly said, rolling her eyes.

“Team Rudolph is really wiping the floor with Team Frosty,” Aunt Janet added.

“Good thing Hudson didn’t let little things like the lack of a bedroom door scare him away from Gracie. He certainly is an upgrade from Gracie’s last boyfriend. Speaking of, maybe the Frosty team coach wants to sub out James for a fresh player. Maybe Codie?”

Codie was my second cousin who had just turned four and had all the coordination on the ice of a newborn foal.

My brother and cousins on Team Rudolph jeered at Team Frosty, shit-talking them.

“You should have set up Kelly with one of the Wynter brothers.”

“Put Codie in. Make it a fair game.”

James shifted on his skates angrily while Team Rudolph ribbed him.

“I’ll fight all of you,” Uncle Albert yelled back.

“I’m not stitching anyone up,” Kirk said. “I’m going to pretend like I don’t know any of you.”

“Can I play, Dad?” Codie called. “I wanna play.”

“Sub him in,” Hudson called, skating around in tight circles. “I need a challenge.”

Codie squealed, “Yay!” and jumped on the ice, racing to the puck that Hudson had.

He smiled at the kid. It was the single most adorable thing I’d ever seen.

“Ahead there be dangerous waters,” Dakota said.

“What?” I hissed to her. “I want a big family. He comes from a big family. What could go wrong?”

When I turned my attention back to Hudson, I noticed James barreling across the ice toward him.

Hudson had seen the movement before I did, because he’d already turned to block his body to protect Codie, who was twirling around on the ice, oblivious to my ex hurtling toward them.

“Hudson!” I yelled as James collided with him.

Hudson twisted his body, flipping both of them over Codie who stared, mouth open in awe as the two men sailed over him.

“I got the puck,” Codie called.

No one was paying attention because James was swinging his hockey stick at Hudson, hitting him in the face under the brim of his helmet.

Hudson caught the next blow and wrenched the stick out of James’s hand, shoving him in the stomach with the stick then throwing it aside.

James came back at him red-faced, arms swinging.

“You fucking piece of white trash,” James screamed at Hudson, who blocked the punches.

“Fight!” Granny Murray bellowed. “Fight!”

Both teams raced over.

James might have gotten in an easy punch, but I’d seen Hudson fight, and my ex was no match for him. He got his arm around James as James’s fist glanced off the side of his helmet.

I screamed as Hudson and James crashed into the Plexiglas protection screen right in front of where we were sitting.

Then both teams were pulling their players apart.

“It’s fine. Relax.”

Hudson shrugged off my brother who was unfastening Hudson’s helmet so Kirk could inspect the blood running down his face. “James is just salty I took his ex’s virginity.”

James lunged at Hudson, and his fist collided with Hudson’s nose. The larger man body-slammed him down into the ice; his knee dug into James’s side as he pinned him down. Hudson’s face was terrifying.

“Calm the fuck down,” he growled.

“Fuck you,” James spat. “Gracie, you see what kind of animal he is? He’s beneath you. He’s embarrassing.”

“You started the fight,” I screeched at James. “This is your fault. You almost killed Codie.”

My dad and his brother ushered James off the ice.

On the center of the ice, Codie was wobbling impatiently on his skates.

“You guys, I’m about to score.”

Hudson dragged the sleeve of his jersey across his face, smearing the blood on his cheek, then reattached his helmet and skated over.

The rest of the hockey players still seemed slightly stunned.

It was a little unnerving how quickly Hudson was able to just shake off the violence.

Meanwhile, I couldn’t stop trembling.

Hudson scooped up his hockey stick and made a big dramatic show of trying to stop Codie.

The four-year-old giggled and skated around him then took a swing with his hockey stick.

“Nothing but net,” Dakota whooped.

“Wrong sport,” Granny Murray stated.

“And with that final tiebreaking goal, Team Rudolph is the winner,” Aunt Janet declared.

In the last period of the game, the younger kids had opted to grab a snack and water in the stands with the rest of us nonathletes while the adults finished the game. Thankfully, James had disappeared.

All my cousins and, of course, my brother had grown up playing hockey competitively, and the game moved at a quick pace, the puck flying.

Logan and Hudson played easily off each other, but my uncles on Team Frosty were also no slouches. Most of them were in adult leagues, and my dad’s cousin Nate had played goalie in college and then professionally for a couple years. That was Team Frosty’s saving grace. Usually Frosty never won because of Cousin Nate’s wizardry in the goal, but Hudson had been able to get a few shots on him.

“Yes!” my brother and cousins screamed, swarming Hudson.

Nate took off his helmet.

“Man, if I was about ten years younger, you wouldn’t have had me beat so bad.” He grinned and slapped Hudson on the shoulder.

“Dude, are you kidding me?” Hudson said, shaking his hand. “I haven’t had to work for a goal like that in years. I need to up my game. If I’d lost my focus for a minute, you would have crushed me.”

It felt like my insides were gooey and made of marshmallows watching Hudson with my family, like he was meant to be here with me.

Dakota cleared her throat.

“See?” Violet said to Kelly. “You were chasing quantity when Gracie was chasing quality.”

“Not too late to cancel that wedding and get an upgrade, Kelly,” Aunt Janet said over the loud speaker.

My mom got up to yell at her sister.

“Dinner and a bonfire at Bethany’s house,” Janet hollered as I heard my mom and her little sister squabbling over the loudspeaker.

I ducked out of the seating area and headed down to where the players were changing out of their skates. I hovered as Hudson pulled off all the padding over his head.

Hudson’s gray eyes were dancing when he noticed me. He seemed happy, relaxed. He picked me up, spun me around, then kissed me loudly.

“The man of the hour.”

“My good luck charm.”

“Your face,” I said with a wince when he released me.

“It’s fine.”

“Another scar to add to your collection,” Logan joked.

“What do you need me to load into the car, Gracie?” he said, draping his arm around my shoulder.

Hudson received congratulations and handshakes as he helped me ferry coolers and boxes to his truck.

“That’s the last of it,” I said to him as I opened the passenger’s side door.

He was on me as soon as I got in the car. He smelled like sweat and adrenaline and male. He pulled off his T-shirt, his sweaty body against mine.

“Ooh my gosh,” I gasped as he kissed me, my mouth, my neck.

He pulled at the zipper on my coat.

“Let me see your tits.”

I panted.

The windows were staring to fog up. The heat was radiating off of him, his sweaty hair falling over his forehead.

I struggled, pinned by the jacket as he pushed it down my arms then slid my sweater up. His mouth was hot and hungry on my tits, sucking a nipple.

“What are we doing? This is a public parking lot,” I squeaked.

“I told you I like sex after hockey.”

“Here in your truck?”

“Yeah. I want to fuck that tight pussy.”

My panties and my tights were drenched now.

“Maybe this isn’t—oh my god,” I groaned as his hands slipped under my panties to stroke me.

Hudson kissed me roughly.

“Now you want me to fuck you, don’t you?”

“Um … I—”

He stroked my clit hard.

“You’re practically gushing against my hand, Sugarplum. Don’t lie. You want me to fuck you with my thick, hard cock, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” I gasped and kissed him, sucking on his lower lip.

“You want to be my little puck bunny, Sugarplum?”

“Your what?”

“The hot piece of ass I fuck after winning a hockey game.”

“Guess Santa doesn’t need to bring you any self-esteem for Christmas.”

“And he doesn’t need to bring you a vibrator, Sugarplum,” he said, pushing me between the center console to the back bench in the pickup. “Get on your hands and knees. I need to fuck your wet little cunt.”

I heard his zipper rasp.

“You need to stop wearing these fucking tights,” he said, pulling them and my panties down.

His tongue was in my pussy now, licking me, sucking on my clit.

I whimpered when he withdrew.

“Since you’re not a virgin anymore,” he said as I heard a condom packet rip, “I’m going to fuck you hard and fast.”

His hand slipped briefly under my sweater to squeeze my breasts. Then he spread my legs. They strained against the thick tights around my knees.

“Yeah, I want to fuck that pussy,” he said hoarsely, spreading me.

I felt the tip of his cock briefly at my opening.

Before I could beg for him, he was in me in one quick motion, buried to the hilt. I moaned loudly as he filled me.

“You like that, huh, Sugarplum,” he said, one hand tangling in my hair, the other on my ass holding me still, keeping me from falling off the truck bench.

His hips snapped back, then he was buried in me again.

“Fuck, your pussy feels so good.”

Then he fucked me for real. Last night had been a leisurely trip through the snowy woods. This was a fucking blizzard.

Hudson kept up the furious pace. I tried to stifle my cries, but it was no use.

Something about how the tights at my knees kept my pussy clenched tight around his cock was enough to bring me rapidly to the edge as he fucked me, quick and dirty doggy style in the back of his pickup truck.

The zipper of his pants scraped against my ass as his thick cock pounded in me.

“You like being fucked like this, don’t you,” he growled, his hand tight in my hair.

I gasped for breath as he pulled my head back, arching my back, his cock hitting some deep point of pleasure inside of me.

“Hudson, fuck me,” I moaned. “Fuck me harder. Make me come.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw motion through the slightly foggy windshield. But I didn’t want Hudson to stop. I needed him.

I panted and whimpered as he kept up the furious pace, driving me higher and higher until I was falling over the edge as he pounded away in me.

I heard him grunt, and he was pressing sloppy kisses on my neck, his cock spasming in me.

“Fuck,” he said in my neck. “I really am a bad influence on you, huh?” he said, squeezing my ass one more time then tugging up my tights.

“You seem pretty proud of yourself.”

“You can’t tell me I’m not the best fuck you’ve ever had in your life.”

He laughed at the joke, still high on the win and the fighting and the male sports stuff and, of course, the sex.

I turned my head to kiss him again.

“I just love fucking a good, tight pussy.”

Hudson practically had to lift me into the passenger’s seat, and I landed like a beached whale while he climbed over the console to the driver’s seat with way more grace and agility than someone his size had any right to.

“Just for that,” he said, grinning as he leaned over and kissed me, “I’ll let you listen to Christmas carols. I might even sing along.”

“If that’s your reaction, I need to let you fuck me in the back of your truck more often,” I joked.

“I’m pretty sure I almost made you pass out,” he said, slipping on his sunglasses.

“Cocky asshole.”

I reached over to wipe my mitten across the fogged-up windshield and screamed.

There were James and Kelly, whispering to themselves.

Hudson rolled down the driver’s side window.

“What?” he barked.

James jumped. He still had tissue stuffed up his bruised nose.

“Gracie is my future sister-in-law,” James said stubbornly. “She comes from a good family, and you need to stop treating her like the trailer trash where you come from.”

I sucked in a breath.

Hudson just smirked then swung his head to me.

“Did you like getting fucked in the back of my truck, Sugarplum?”

My face felt hot.

He raised an eyebrow.

“Um … yeah,” I stammered.

Hudson turned that feral grin back to James and slapped the side of his truck.

James winced.

“She liked getting fucked, so I think we’re good, thanks. Unless you want me to break your jaw this time.”