Dear Heart, You Screwed Me

Fluttering my eyes open, it took me a moment to register where I was. Killian was snoring softly, my head on his chest. I slowly pushed myself up, careful not to wake him. My finger skimmed across his pink scar, tracing it down to under his ribs. My brows furrowed as I wondered what happened.

Lifting my finger, I slipped out of bed quietly and dressed myself before sneaking out of his apartment.

It was the perfect goodbye. No other words needed to be exchanged.

I rushed down the hallway and into the lift, continuing until I got to my apartment.

Locking the door behind me I didn’t even undress, I just fell into bed. Exhaustion sweeping over me before I fell into a peaceful slumber.

It had been a week and Killian had kept his word. I hadn’t heard from him, not even on a work basis. He cancelled the work meeting he arranged, saying it was for the best but if I needed to, I could always go and see him. He put the distance between us and for that, I was grateful.

I was at the office bright and early every day, hoping that each day was the day that Adele promoted me like she said. But up until now, she had hardly said two words to me. I don’t know what I had done to upset her, unless Killian told her that we had an out of work relationship. Well, we couldn’t really call it a relationship.

We fucked a few times. It wasn’t a real relationship.

Sighing, I typed out a reply to some emails that Adele couldn’t be bothered to reply to because replying to her clients was obviously beneath her now, she had her dogsbody to do it all for her.

After an hour, I pushed away from the desk to make a cup of coffee. It tasted like shit, but it was better than the twenty different flavoured teas they had. When I walked back towards my desk, I heard light chatter coming from Adele’s office. Her door was cracked open, I shouldn’t eavesdrop but I couldn’t help it. Walking slowly to her door, I stepped aside so she couldn’t see my shadow through the frosted glass.

“Well, she is going to have to get over it,” I heard her harsh tone. “I know I did, but she played into my hands. I knew she was good, she got us what we wanted and now I have no use for her.”

My heart raced.

“That’s my final decision, she isn’t getting the promotion. I’m not going to be at a loss if she walks out. In fact I’ll be glad to wash my hands of her, I’ll be asking her to leave sooner rather than later anyway.”

I felt my heart drop out of my chest. Staggering back, I knocked into my desk, spinning around and placing my cup on the surface. I wasn’t sticking around.

Throwing my belongings into my bag, including the photo frames of me and Connie and my parents. Grabbing my coat, scarf and hat, I threw them over my arm. Rushing past the turnstiles, I yanked my lanyard off and slapped it down on the front desk.

I didn’t stop when the receptionist called me name, I held my hand up and flipped her off before pushing through the rotating doors into the soft snow blizzard. I was freezing, but I didn’t want to stop. The cold air burned my lungs, my eyes streamed with hot tears, but I continued walking through the snow. I needed the air; I needed the time to think.

I just wanted to go home.

I sat on my sofa in my comfort clothes of leggings and an oversized jumper as I sipped on a proper cup of tea. What the fuck had just happened.

She was going to let me go? After getting her Lordes’ biggest fucking signing to date she couldn’t follow through on her word.

To say I was pissed off was an understatement. Snatching my phone from beside me I tapped on Connie’s name.

Me: Guess who walked out of her job today. That fucking woman is an ogre.

The three dots popped up to show me she was replying

Connie: No. Fucking. Way. What a dog. What happened??????

I rolled my eyes, I could feel the heat pumping through my blood, the rage consuming me.

Me: I overheard her on the phone, no doubt to your dad, telling him that she wasn’t going to follow through with what she said and that I wouldn’t be getting the promotion. Whoever she was talking to must have asked her why, and she said I played into her hands and got what she wanted. She didn’t care if I walked, she would be glad to wash her hands of me and would be getting rid of me soon anyway.

I tapped my phone screen so hard I was worried I was going to break it.

Connie: That bitch.

I saw the three dots appear as she began typing again.

Connie: Want me to speak to my dad?

I shook my head as if she was here as I typed out my response.

Me: No, no no!!! No speaking to your dad. It’s done. I’ll sort something out. Shit, this close to Christmas. Fuck it. Maybe I shouldn’t have walked out.

I sent the message before dropping the phone into my lap. What had I done? My phone began ringing, making me smile when I saw Connie’s name.

“Hello?” I asked a little apprehensive.

“Are you okay?” she asked, her voice low.

“Yeah, why are you talking so quietly?” I asked.

“I’m at work, shouldn’t be on my phone… I just wanted to see if you were okay.”

“I am fine, just annoyed but more annoyed at myself for walking out without saying anything.” I rolled my eyes to the empty room.

“Then go back over there and give her a piece of your mind,” I heard Connie snigger. “If I wasn’t at work, I would totally be there with you.”

“I know you would.”

“Do you really think she was on the phone to my dad.”

I shrugged as if Connie could see me, “I just assumed.”

“I couldn’t see him being okay with that.”

“Well, people surprise you when it comes to business and money.” I felt the agitation brewing, “I am just annoyed that I worked so hard to get Harlen on board and now I’ve been disregarded.”

“I know hun, it’s a real low thing to do,” I heard Connie sigh, “look, I’ve got to go. I could possibly get you some shifts if you want some… just let me know.”

“Thank you,” I whispered before cutting the phone off.

I didn’t want Connie getting in trouble, that’s all we needed, two of us out of a job.

I sat festering, playing the scenario over in my head. I should have said something, instead I have just slipped out like a coward. I loved my job, I loved doing what I done, I just didn’t enjoy working for her.

Pushing off the sofa, I began to pace.

I swear, if she was on the phone to Killian and that twat hadn’t called me or messaged… that’s when I realised I had him blocked still. Fumbling with my phone, I unlocked it and found Killian’s name, unblocking him. I gave it ten minutes, a few missed call notifications, and messages but nothing in the last week. What an arsehole. Did he know about this? Did he know I was going to be asked to leave?

Launching my phone onto the sofa, I walked for the door. Grabbing my scarf and coat on my way out, I wrapped myself up before slamming the door.

I was more than angry, I was raging. How dare he not even have the decency to give me the heads up.

Connie told me where he worked, it was close to my office. Hailing a cab, I jumped in and gave the driver Killian’s address.

The drive took longer than expected, there were taillights most of the way which gave me even more time to let my anger stew. Throwing the driver his money and not waiting for the change, I opened the door and flew for the main door of his office. Barging through the reception, I didn’t stop when asked where I was going. Pressing the lift button continuously, I watched as it dropped the many floors. Letting out an irritated huff, I stepped into the lift and pressed the top floor. Of course, he would have the top floor. Pretentious prick.

Tapping my foot on the floor, I watched as the arrow moved up the floors.

“Come on,” I groaned to the empty lift. Finally, the doors pinged open. I barged through a couple of people that were waiting for the lift. I stalled for a moment as I looked down the hallway. Left or right?

I decided right.

Storming down the narrow hallway, I passed a sign that said PA to Killian Hayes.

Bingo.

“Sorry, you can’t go in there,” a young man said as he stood up from behind a desk.

“Bite me. I’m his wife.” I snapped, flipping him off and pushing the door open, the door swinging and hitting the wall. I winced.

Oops.

I scanned the large office, there were floor to ceiling windows behind his desk, large bookshelves sitting on one wall, on the other there was, no doubt stupidly expensive, art. Well, I thought it looked shit. He even had his own dressing room in here and a bathroom. Of course, he did. I turned to face the young PA who was looking at me wide-eyed as if I was a crazy woman. I smiled a sickly smile, pushing my index finger to my lips as I told him to keep quiet.

He nodded.

Stepping back, I closed the office door and sat on the sofa waiting for the dickhead himself to arrive.

I don’t know how long I had been sitting there when I heard the distinct click of his shoes, followed by high heels.

Fuck.

Standing up, I went to rush for the door, but it was too late. I was out of time. I looked round the room and saw Killian’s boxed desk. Running for that I hid under it.

I heard Adele’s laugh, as the door closed. Adele’s heels clicked along his floor as she took a seat opposite where Killian was no doubt going to sit. I saw his shoes as he pulled out the chair, his eyes falling to under his desk where I was on my knees, my hands pressed to the floor. His eyes widened as he saw me, my own eyes mirroring his.

Then a hot as sin smirk crept over his face as he took a seat, his legs parted. I tried to stay as still as I could, I didn’t want Adele knowing I was here.

She was droning on about work but to be honest, I lost interest. My anger was still brewing, but I couldn’t have it out with him while she was in here. I didn’t want her knowing what goes on between me and Killian.

I nibbled my bottom lip, my eyes focusing on the evident bulge in Killian’s suit trousers. Was he turned on?

I ran my fingertips up his thighs, causing him to fidget in his chair. I smirked. I continued, edging closer to him. My fingers fumbled with his button, tugging them down. He didn’t stop me.

Licking my lips, I pulled his hard cock out of his restricting boxers and shuffled on my knees closer to him.

Should I be doing this? No.

Was it going to stop me? Also no.

Pressing my lips over the tip of his cock, I pushed my mouth slowly down his length.

He sucked in a breath through his teeth. Holding him at the back of my throat for a moment, his hand slipped down his thigh before grabbing a handful of my hair, pulling my head up then pushing it back down again.

Adele was still talking; Killian obviously wasn’t paying attention. He was enjoying having his cock sucked by me.

It turned me on knowing that she was sitting on the other side of the desk while I pleasured this beautiful man.

I felt him jerk in my mouth, a low guttural groan vibrating in his throat.

“Are you okay?” I heard the concern in the bitch’s voice.

“More than okay, continue,” his voice was low as he tried to contain himself.

His fingers pulled at the root of my hair, I stifled my moan as I took him deep, his balls contracting as he came, it didn’t take him long. He banged his fist on the desk.

“Did you hear what I said?” Adele’s laughter died down as her voice projected across the office.

“No,” Killian panted, his hand moving from my head as he popped his cock back into his trousers discreetly, I wiped my mouth with a smile on my face.

“The news, what happened this morning?”

“What news?” Killian’s disinterested voice made me smile.

“I got rid of Reese.”

I saw and felt Killian tense as my fingers dug into his thigh. I froze under the desk, my eyes widening.

She wasn’t on the phone to him this morning.

“You what?” he snarled at her.

“Reese, I got rid of her,” her tone completely unbothered, “well, she walked… but I was going to get rid of her.”

“Why would you do that? She got you Harlen fucking Laufer?! The best signing the company has ever had!” He spat, his tone was angry. I could just see his face now in my mind. Beautiful jaw clenched, eyes wide and bulging. His pulse would be racing, the vein throbbing in his neck. “And you wanted rid of her?!” He slammed his hands down on the desk as he stood up.

“You’re going to give Reese her job back.”

“No,” Adele said too calmly for my liking, you could hear the smile in her voice.

“Adele,” he gritted.

“I’m surprised you didn’t know actually…” she drifted off for a moment.

“And why is that?” I could tell he was clenching his jaw even tighter now, his tone aggravated.

“Give me a little credit,” she snorted a laugh.

Killian didn’t answer, I could see his hands balled at his side.

“I know you’re sleeping with her. She knew from the get-go that I didn’t take kindly to my staff sleeping with clients or investors.” She laughed, “what a slut, I didn’t think she would be such an easy lay.”

“I never want you to say that word and Reese’s name in the same sentence again. Besides, we’re not sleeping together.” His voice was steady, my heart dropped. Was he actually going to lie to her?

“We’re married.”

I gasped at the same time as Adele.

“You’re what?”

“You heard me, now, do yourself a favour… pick your bag up and get the fuck out of my office,” he growled.

Adele didn’t move.

“GET OUT!” He bellowed, his voice bouncing off the walls. I jumped; angry Killian was not someone I wanted to get on the wrong side of.

“Killian,” Adele said a little taken aback.

“Get out now Adele, before I call security and have them march you out.”

“You wouldn’t do that; this is your name on the line as well Killian. You need to remember that.”

“Last warning…”

“I’m leaving,” she said quietly, the chair scraped across the floor, followed by her heels clicking quickly.

Once the door was shut, Killian crouched down, smirking at me. Angry Killian had left with Adele, and now playful, beautiful Killian was here.

“Hello, you.”

His hand reached under the desk as he helped me out. Standing tall, I brushed myself down.

“Hey,” I breathed, tucking a loose strand of my hair behind my ear. “It didn’t take you long, did it?” I teased, “Missed me that much?” I blushed.

“With your dirty little mouth, it never takes me long.”

I swatted at him in the chest.

“Not that I am not pleased to see you, but why are you here?” he sat in his chair, kicking his feet up on his desk. I walked slowly round to the other side, knotting my fingers together.

“Well,” I breathed out, “I was coming to shout at you.” I nibbled my bottom lip as my eyes cast down to my hands that were sitting in my lap.

“And why is that?” he said trying to stop himself from smirking.

“Because of what happened at work this morning, I’ve been getting in early, you know… to try and keep occupied and my mind busy.” I heard him sigh but I didn’t look up, “I went to make myself a drink and when I came back, I heard Adele on the phone. I didn’t even know she was in. Anyway, she was on the phone to someone telling them that she wasn’t going to promote me, and she was going to let me go sooner rather than later.” My eyes lifted and met his, a scowled look on his face, his brows pinched and furrowed as he listened.

“But now I know that she wasn’t on the phone to you…” I shrugged, “I was annoyed because I thought after everything we had been through that you would have had the decency to give me a heads up or at least make sure I was okay… but that anger and rage have gone now because it wasn’t you on the other end of the line.”

“Reese, you should know me better than that…” he dragged his feet off his desk and leaned forward in his office chair. “I wouldn’t have even entertained the conversation.”

The room grew with thick tension, I felt choked as our gazes locked.

“You’re going back, right?” Killian finally broke the silence.

I shook my head from side to side. “How can I go back after walking out? And you told Adele about us… we’re getting annulled in a little over a month. She is going to hate me even more now.”

He didn’t say anything, just rubbed his index finger and thumb across his stubble.

“I just wanted the fresh start. I wanted to make something of myself here… yet nothing has gone to plan. I’ve lost my job, I accidentally married my best friend’s dad… And just sucked him off under his desk because I liked the fact that Adele was sitting there, and I could do that to you.” I face palmed myself, agitated suddenly.

“I liked that you done that…” he winked, his tongue darting out to lick his top lip. “It’s just a shame I won’t be able to return the favour since we have both agreed not to do this anymore…” his voice was raspy, his eyes hooded as he shuffled to the edge of his seat.

“I know…” I breathed a whisper, “it’s for the best.” I swallowed, praying that I could feel some saliva back in my mouth.

“It is,” he nodded.

Pressing my legs together to dull the ache from my throbbing sex. I knew we couldn’t, we had to refrain from doing anything.

He was my best friend’s dad.

We had to put a stop to it, we both agreed.

I had to take myself out of this tempting situation. I ached for him, I wanted his hands and mouth all over me. It was forbidden now.

He was a temptation I couldn’t give into.

My whole body hummed as I stood, my skin alight with a burning sensation from his gaze. It was hard to step back, his penetrating gaze pinning me. I caught my breath as I stepped back towards the office door.

“Where you going?” he asked, standing from his desk and walking towards me cautiously.

“I’ve got to get out of here… one of us needs to be sensible.” I swallowed, my back hitting the door.

He closed the gap between us, one of his hands pushed against the wall beside my head, the other was deep in his pocket.

“Are you sure there isn’t anything else I can do for you?” seduction laced his voice.

“Very sure.” I nodded quickly, breaking eye contact and ducking under his arm.

Opening the door I stepped over the threshold, I felt like I couldn’t breathe.

“Hey, Hey… Reese!” he called as he stood in opening of the door and grabbed my arm so I couldn’t run.

“What?” I whispered.

“Are you going back to Lordes?” his voice was low, his beautiful brown eyes volleying back and forth between mine in that way he had.

I inhaled deeply before shaking my head side to side, “No, ” I breathed.

“You can’t let her win.”

“I’m not letting her win, Killian. I just don’t want to work with her anymore. I deserve better,” I pulled my arm from his tight grip. “I’ll be fine, Connie said she can get me some shifts at the hotel if needs be,” I shrugged my shoulders up, “I’ve waitressed before, it’s easy money.”

Killian shook his head quickly, “No, no,” his tone stern. “You can work with me until something more permanent comes along. You can help me with any loose ends that I just don’t have time for,” his eyes begged me to say yes.

“Can I think about it?”

He nodded.

“Come to dinner Friday night with Connie, a little drink and catch up before Christmas break. It’ll be nice to see you,” he stepped back inside his office, “please say yes.”

I nodded.

“That would be lovely.”

He beamed at me.

“I’ll see you Friday.”

“I’ll see you Friday.” And with that, I left.