. Apostasy . A Luna's Struggle

Keira awoke Anulla with her screaming from a nightmare. Surprisingly, a young man, maybe sixteen, ran in and immediately began calming her. The young man spoke softly to Keira, smoothing her hair, telling her he loved her, and would die to protect her.

“My baby brother, Benj,” Brenna smiled sadly, looking into Anulla’s eyes, “They’re mates.”

That was all it took for Anulla to begin crying. “I h–hate m-my m-mate,” she stammered out between broken sobs.

Brenna held her close and whispered to her, “I was hoping the narcoberries would make you forget what he did to you. Don’t worry, I will do everything I can to protect you from that monster.”

“He’s the Monarch,” Anulla whispered brokenly. “I’m his mate, h-he’ll find me. Don’t l-let him t-t-take me back.” She cried for a long time as Brenna rocked her carefully, whispering soothing words.

“I won’t, sweetheart. I don’t care who he is, I won’t let him take you back,” the healer promised.

Another brother brought in trays with a hearty venison stew and fresh bread and something called cake. Anulla thought she had tasted it before when she was very young, but Keira never had and almost bit Benj when he took a bite of hers. Anulla had laughed, really laughed for the first time in a long time.

After dinner, Brenna gave them both a dose of narcoberry extract so they would sleep through the night. As Anulla dozed off, she felt something she had not known since she was small, she felt safe now. In a month, when she could walk again, Brenna would take her to the temple and she could ask for sanctuary, then she would never have to see HIM again. She didn’t even know his name and she didn’t want to.

-^^^^-

She and her little brother were running along the path to the lake. Her mother had given her a bag with food and a blanket tied to the outside. After her mother secured it to her back, she held her face, “Remember Anulla, if they ask, tell them you are eight. Do you understand? You are eight. If you tell them you are ten, they will kill you. How old are you?”

"I’m eight, mommy.”

"Good girl, now run, to the hummingbird cave I showed you. Stay there until I come get you. If I don’t come in a week, take Tomas and go west to the mountains, cross the river....”

She opened her eyes. Her mother had made her lie about her age until she forgot her real age, and now she remembered why. Anulla looked at the moon drifting down through the trees. Dawn was painting the sky pink. A hummingbird was at the feeder, she envied it.

-^^^^-

Tomas wanted to go outside but Anulla wouldn’t let him, he was three and didn’t understand that they had to hide until mommy came. Over the past few days, they had watched other children being dragged away, all were crying. A thorny bush hid the tiny entrance, keeping them safe. The sunlight was warm on the front of the cave, and Anulla was tired from staying awake at night to watch, she dozed off.

She woke to hear Tomas crying outside. A large warrior had him by the arm, dragging him away. For a moment, she almost stayed hidden but her need to protect her brother drew her out. She ran after them and threw rocks at the warrior. When he dropped Tomas, she shouted at him to run. But he had just sat on the ground and cried, and they had both been caught.

For many years, she thought about the cave and how peaceful it was listening to the hummingbirds come and go. For three days they had been safely hidden before they were caught. Anulla had been whipped for the first time that day. The rush of the whip through the air reminded her of the whistle of the hummingbirds’ wings, she always pretended she was there in the cave, listening to them when she was being whipped.

Anulla woke up to the sounds of hummingbirds, several feeders were hanging just outside the window, a tray of sweetbreads and juice sat by her bed. As she nibbled, she watched the jeweled creatures flit to and fro. She longed for their freedom, to sip nectar and trill in joy because they had wings to go where they wanted, when they wanted. Because they did not have a mate who was a monster that had broken their body and was trying to break their spirit.

For two weeks, she had laid in bed as her hip and shoulder healed. Every time she slept she dreamed of HIM, he was looking for her, trying to see through her eyes. She was glad she couldn’t see the mountains or valley views from her window, just sky through trees and hummingbirds. Every time he forced himself into her mind that was all he saw... her hummingbirds.

-^^^^-

The first snows came to the mountains and the hummingbirds went south for the winter. Brenna’s older brother Joel had made Anulla a small, carved hummingbird to keep in her pocket so she would never forget them. They left the High Valley and moved the cattle herds to the lower winter pasture lands around Grande Mesa. Sitting in the passenger cabin of the train, Anulla pulled her scarf up around her throat as the snow-covered scenery flew by. Brenna had warned her not to let anyone see her mark, except Luna Mira. Her hand rested over her belly. She was two and a half months pregnant and she was terrified. But the further she traveled from the border the safer she felt, as the bond with HIM grew thinner with each mile. She had never been on or even seen a train before, it was a comfortable and fast way to travel.

The Western Allied packs had maintained the old railroad lines within and between their territories to ensure that they could move livestock, supplies, and warriors quickly when needed. There were several cities that had existed for centuries, it was like another world. She-wolves worked and fought alongside males, they were valued, respected, and most of all, loved. The miles flew past as they went west, leaving the steep mountain valleys and tunnels behind.

Anulla sipped the last of her tea, a medicinal blend to help with the morning sickness and give her vitamins. Brenna insisted she drink it all the time since she did not have a mate to ease her. She also taught Anulla how to block the Monarch from her mind. He was still seeking her, raging that she was missing, that she was happy and felt safe. He began taking it out on female after female. It had given Anulla a whole new set of nightmares. She fingered the scarlet lining of her traveling cloak, it masked her scent, and was hidden under a quilted brown batik. The special dye and woven fibers absorbed her scent allowing her to travel undetectable to the sensitive noses of wolves, almost as if by magic. The ‘red riding hoods’ as Brenna teasingly called them, were how they had gotten her away from the Monarch and Keira away from his warriors.

Brenna and Joel had found her in the grotto after Sonja’s body was seen in the river. Hearing her screams, made it easy in the rough terrain. They had waited for the Monarch to leave witnessing over an hour of her horror. Brenna had to hold Joel back the whole time, least he challenge the Monarch and be killed. After he left, they waited to make sure he was gone. They were surprised Anulla had the strength to drag herself to the water. Brenna drugged her then they wrapped her in an extra cloak. Joel had carried her many miles to safety.

Keira had tried to escape to the river when Benj had found her running blindly through the forest an hour before dawn. The Monarch’s warriors had begun letting her get out of sight, so it was more fun to ‘hunt’ her. Benj and Keira had known they were mates as soon as they touched, meaning her and Sonja’s mother had lied about their ages too. Keira was at least twelve. His cloak had hidden both their scents and he had carried her on his back the rest of the night and all the next day, evading the Monarch’s warriors.

Last week, Keira and Benj had gone to the northwest territory with Brenna’s uncle as Keira’s guardian. She would be safe, protected by their family until she was seventeen. Only then would she be allowed to be fully mated to Benj, and until then she would be educated, taught a trade, or whatever she wanted. Anulla missed her, but she was happy that Sonja’s baby sister would have a good life with a mate who loved her. It was the only dream Sonja had ever wanted for them.

Joel sat down beside her and gave her a new cup of hot tea. “Look, see that. It’s the Grande Mesa and beyond it to the south are the ruins of Mesa Verde and the Temple of the Moon. Our cousin, Luna Mira, arranged for you to meet a priestess of the moon and petitioned for your sanctuary. Our mothers are coming to help you through your pregnancy.”

Anulla stared down at the cup, she still could not make herself look up at his eyes for more than a moment, “Thank you for everything, Joel.”

He patted her hand, “I never told you, but my mate was visiting my sister the night Wheatlands fell. I heard she died trying to come home. They beat and raped her for days after she and my sister killed a guard and tried to escape. They didn’t care that they had mates. The old Monarch had them put in stocks and let his warriors do terrible things to them every hour until they were both dead. They had almost made it to the river when they were caught and taken back. That’s why Brenna, Benj, and I go across the river. To help those who are brave, like you.”

Anulla felt a tear drop onto her hand as she held the cup to her lips, her breath whispered across the stream, “I’m not brave. They did that to my mother, and when she died fighting the Beta, I ran like a coward.”

“No, you were brave, you knew what would happen if they caught you, but you still brought two of your friends to safety. Yes, Sonja fell and died, but she died free and her little sister will live free. So, thank you, thank you for bringing them. Thank you for saving my baby brother’s mate. Our mother is excited to meet you. She has lived in the temple since father’s death. I know they will give you sanctuary and who your mate is won’t matter when they learn the truth of what is happening in the Monarchy lands. Of what happened to you.” Joel sounded so sincere, as he held her free hand. “I am sorry for what he did to you, but don’t blame your child. Raise him or her to be everything their father is not.”

Anulla squeezed his hand, she couldn’t find words to respond to his admiration of her or understand the way his eyes shined when he looked at her. He held her hand till she closed her eyes to sleep.

A blond-haired version of Brenna was at the train station. She rushed to hug Joel, then hugged Anulla, who was overwhelmed by her sweet, bubbly nature. Luna Mira reminded her of her mother and Luna Susanne before the Monarch came. Two older she-wolves also hugged Anulla. One was Joel, Benj, and Brenna’s mother Cathy, and the other was her sister Mira’s mother Cassie. At the Alpha’s manor that night, Anulla fell asleep in a room with a hummingbird stained glass window. She wept, grateful for feelings she had not known since she was a child, feelings of happiness and home.