Written In Black

I woke up to the smell of bacon and eggs downstairs, I sat up immediately and made my way downstairs.

I walked into the kitchen to see her cooking breakfast by the stove, “That smells great mom.”

“Thanks hon, did you sleep okay?” my mind raced back to that horrible dream I’d had, and I blocked it out of my mind right away.

“Yes, you?”

She sighed, “I guess.”

“Excited about prom?” she spoke again.

I nodded, “I’m just going with friends, not Peter.”

“So, not excited?”

“What do you think?”

She set down the spatula and spoke, “I wouldn’t mind you going with him, if he hadn’t tried to get in your pants.”

“Mom, I would have handled it, I wasn’t exactly ready anyway.”

“Alright, I’ll make you a deal, and know this Jay, this is the only time I’ll do this. You can go with Peter, but--if I ever find out you two got busy, this will be the last time you’ll be seeing him, understood?”

I nodded, “That didn’t take much.”

“Well, I realized I have been being too hard on you about this, I know that it’s supposed to be your night, you should enjoy it, I want that for you, as long as you follow my rules.”

“Thanks mom.”

What I hadn’t realized, was why Peter thought he would be able to go with me, after my mom had seen us? Maybe he knew my mom would come around, maybe I knew I just wasn’t consciously sure as I thought I’d be. Either way, things were better now, and I’d actually go to a dance for once, with someone I loved.

I just wish I had told him that more often, it seemed I’d rarely said it to Peter, especially the times he needed it. I suddenly realized how much Peter has done and given for me, I’d known he was strong, and what he had to go through losing me, I just wished I was less stubborn and had been easier to Peter in harder times.

“So, do I get to see my dress?” the doorbell rang as I spoke.

I turned to my mom, “I’ll get it.”

I opened the door to find Sean and Scarlett standing before me, “Who is it?”

“Oh, my friends from school mom!” but I knew once I said it I’d made a mistake, because Sean looked nowhere close to even eighteen at the least.

Mom walked over wiping her hands with a rag then reached out to shake Sean’s hand, “Nice to see you again Scarlett, and who are you?”

“Sean, a friend of Jay’s.”

“Great, are you here for--”

“We just came by for the school dance, we still have a few things to catch up on before tonight.”

I looked back at my mom, who surprisingly bought it, “Well, don’t be out too long.”

“Okay, we won’t” I gave her a hug goodbye and left.

“So, what’s going on--” I was grabbed from my waist, then suddenly I ended up shoved against the wall of a store, Sean had his elbow grinded in my chest while Scarlett stood and watched the scene play out.

“Sean, what the hell!”

“Where is it!” His voice was so loud and fierce, it made my spine shiver.

“Where’s what! What are you talking about?” Sean then wrapped his hand around my neck, squeezing it tighter by the second.

I looked at Sean, wondering how any of this could possibly make sense, then I realized, Sean’s eyes looked the same as Peter’s in my dream.

Finally I gave up, my body grew weaker as Sean gripped tighter, I closed my eyes and prayed there would be something good for me waiting.

Then I heard a cracking sound, I opened my eyes to find Sean lying on the ground, then slowly turn into ash, Scarlett was gone, I was alone.

What just happened? I was too scared to go home, I didn’t know who to trust anymore. As I took my first step, I tumbled to the ground, and remembered black surrounding me.

~

I woke up back in my room, “Oh, I see you’re finally awake, because it’s time to get ready, didn’t you tell me this thing started at nine?”

I shook my head, “What time is it now?” what I really wanted to know is, how am I here, what happened, where’s Peter, and again, what the hell happened!

“Eight, so hurry up, Peter is downstairs waiting.”

“What--no!” I sat up from my bed and made my way downstairs, to find Peter, Sean, and Scarlett all sitting on the couch, as if nothing had happened.

Sean sat up, making his way towards me, I stepped back, “You--you were dead”

Sean shook his head, “What are you talking about?” Scarlett stared at me intensely, who seemed as shocked as I was.

I now stood in the kitchen, distancing myself from Peter as well.

“Jay, what’s going on?”

“You’re all going to pretend you don’t know what happened?”

“Jay.” Sean spoke up, coming towards me.

“Stay away from me.” I glanced at Peter to find confusion in his eyes and despair.

“Jay--” Peter reached for my hand, but I pulled my hand back, my mom made her way into the kitchen, and I could see I’ve caused unwanted attention.

“Jay, is everything alright?”

I shook my head, “They need to leave, all of them.”

“What, why?”

“They just have to mom,” and I couldn’t believe I was going to say this, “Because,” I looked Peter dead in the eye, and as much as this hurt, it needed to happen, “Peter and I broke up.”

Peter dropped to his knees Sean and Scarlett stood there with confusion.

“Care to comprehend?”

“No.” this time it was a whisper. By this time, Peter had not shifted his gaze away from my face, and not once did I want to look at him, to see the agony in his face, never before had I seen him in that much pain.

“I see.” mom spoke quietly, then shifted towards the door.

Sean and Scarlett made their way out.

Peter stood, but never moved, “This is it, this is truly what you want?”

I wanted to cry so badly, but no matter what, I knew I couldn’t.

“You should go.” I crossed my arms and kept my gaze at the door, and away from Peter’s face. Peter left without a word more.

“Do you want to talk about it?” I shook my head.

“Are you still going to go?”

“Ya, I’ll still go. I’ve got friends to hang with there.” which I knew was a lie, considering the only friend I had was Allie, and she probably was living it up with Cay.

“So, your dress,” I nodded.

“Did you see it?”

I shook my head, “I wasn’t exactly paying attention.” I made my way upstairs, to see my dress laid out before me, it was a light violet color, with tiered ruffled lace along the bottom, it was beautiful.

“Where did you get this?”

My mom chuckled, “I didn’t, I made it.”

I turned to her, shocked, “How--mom!”

“What?”

“You took your time to make this, you should be getting sleep, I--”

“Will accept the dress.”

I let out a wide sigh, “Thanks mom.”

“Hurry up and get dressed, what is it now--a quarter after?”

I nodded, “Alright.”

By the time I finished getting ready, I came downstairs, “Oh--Jay, you look so beautiful…I’m so sorry it didn’t work out with Peter.”

I shrugged, “I just--don’t want to talk about it.” I said with my head down.

She brushed her hand against my shoulder, “Hey, cheer up, you look beautiful, take a look.” She motioned me to the mirror and I looked up for a moment, to see that I had looked nice, I forced a smile to convince my mom I would be happy, but underneath it, I knew the sad truth, that I had just broken up with Peter, when I knew it was the wrong choice…but I couldn’t just ignore the fact, that for the past year and a half now, Peter has been nothing more than distant, and uncooperative in our relationship, and if what I saw in him, wasn’t a dream, if what I saw in Sean, Scarlett, and Peter was real, then the best thing I could do was distant myself as well.

“What time do you want me to pick you up?”

“Actually, I’ll just drive myself there.” she gave me a concerned look.

“It’s fine mom, really.” I hoped she would agree.

She sighed, “Just--try to have some fun, I know it will be hard, but just try--and if it’s not too much to ask, at least get a picture for me.” I nodded.