Until Friday Night (A Field Party Book 1)

MAGGIE

He was hurting. I had to remember that. He was lost and hurting and seeking comfort. I should stop him. I shouldn’t let him do something he’d regret tomorrow.

But I couldn’t.

He looked at me like he wanted me desperately. Like he wanted this desperately. Like I was beautiful.

I cracked a little more.

I’d never felt like this; my body hadn’t known it could feel like this. And I was enjoying this too much to make him stop.

“West,” I managed to get out. But I quickly forgot why I’d even said his name as his kisses moved lower.

My head was spinning. I wasn’t getting enough oxygen. Or maybe I was getting too much. I didn’t know. I just wanted more of him. Of this.

His hand settled firmly on my back, pressing my bare chest against his as his mouth covered mine again. “You feel so damn good,” he whispered as he nibbled and licked at my lips. I agreed, he felt just as good.

I got so lost in his embrace, at first I didn’t notice that his fingertips were grazing the inner waistband of my shorts.

I wanted to believe he wanted me. But I feared he just needed anyone right now. If it were Raleigh here, would he want her? Was this just a distraction and I was simply the available girl?

I felt a pain in my chest at the thought. I didn’t want to be just a distraction. He meant too much to me for that to be all I was to him. But how did I tell him no when he was hurting so much?

“West,” I choked out, and he froze. That got his attention fast.

He dropped his head to my shoulder and breathed deeply. He didn’t move his hand. “No one has made me feel the way you do, Maggie.”

I didn’t have anyone to compare this to, but I doubted anyone would ever make me feel the way West did.

He continued in a hoarse whisper, “Being with you . . . having you . . . I dream about it. It’s something I can’t explain and I can’t lose, either.”

That was it. What I needed to hear.

“Okay,” I replied, knowing I’d never regret this with him.

He lifted his head, and those blue eyes flared with heat. I was trembling even before his hand slid down farther.

“Trust me?” His voice was thick and raspy.

I just nodded. I couldn’t speak.

My heart was pounding so loudly, I could hear it. My body was on fire, about to shatter into a beautiful oblivion.

I’d said I’d be whatever he needed. I’d do whatever he needed me to do.

I knew now I had been so very right.

He slowly lifted his head and gazed down at me. “I need you. No, I want you. Just you. I don’t need or want anything else.” When he opened his eyes, they were glassy, and I could see the emotion he was holding back.

“What do you want from me?” I asked.

“I need you too much. I want you so much. You’re just . . . I just . . . You’re the only thing that makes the pain go away, Maggie.”

He was trying to survive. I was giving him a reason to survive. He was taking from me. But I wanted to give myself to him.

I ran my hands over his hair and tried to comfort him. I knew he wasn’t ready to hear me tell him I loved him. I wasn’t sure he’d ever want to hear that. But I had to tell him a small portion of the truth.

“I want this. I want you like this. Don’t apologize. What you’re taking, I am giving you willingly.”

He didn’t reply at first. When he finally lifted his head, I saw the heat in his eyes as he looked at me. “I want more. More than I deserve.”

I couldn’t imagine that, years from now, I’d looked back on this night and regret it. Even if this were it for us, I’d have been completely connected with West. It may have been a way to help him with his pain, but it also helped me with mine. Watching him lose his father brought back so much heartache and loss for me. The moments we had just shared made me feel alive. More alive than I’d felt in a very long time.

“I want more too,” I replied.

My heart started to flutter at the idea, and West’s sharp intake of breath told me he understood exactly what I was telling him.

“I don’t want to be a regret for you. Ever,” he said, looking torn.

“And I don’t want to be a regret for you. Ever,” I repeated back to him. I wanted him to cherish this memory just like I would. I wanted to be more to him. Something he’d never forget.

“Nothing about any moment I’ve spent with you will ever be a regret.” The fierceness on his face made me shiver. I felt special. He made me feel that way.