Unmasked

I make sure to wipe away whatever tears I had just before entering the house. I am wearing a plastic smile as I join Thando in the living room who is getting dinner started.

‘Zac was saying hi, he apologies for not coming in.’ I lie through my teeth.

‘Oh that’s sad, I was hoping he enters so that we can have dinner together. It has been forever.’

‘It really has and it’s just sad because I was so sure that he would.’

‘Anyway I am glad you guys have seen each other.’

‘Me too.’ I say getting the cup of tea that he is handing me.

I settle on the kitchen chair and I am not sure how to start conversation, Thando might be a good man but I hate taking advantage of him. He is not a fool and all this that Zac and I keep doing might one day come crushing in my face.

‘Babe how about we go and see mum tomorrow.’ I begin.

He turns to look at me with a surprised look.

‘What?’

‘Woman what do you want?’

‘What do you mean what do I want? Can’t I spend some time with the woman that bore the man that I love with everything in me?’ I ask standing up to go and wrap my hands around his waist. Thando is tall, he is huge and standing next to him makes me look like a midget and I love it.

‘You are being sweet it’s worrying, do you plan on killing me in my sleep.’

‘Come on babe I just want us to spend time with her. You know the last time she was here I didn’t get to spend time with her.’

‘Because she decided to take over your garden.’

‘In my defense you are the one that spoke to her.’

‘Woman I was doing it for you, your emotions were flying over the roof what was I supposed to do?’

I find myself laughing.

‘Can I now finish cooking?’

‘Thando and I don’t want the food that you are cooking.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Our son, Thando. He doesn’t want the food that you are cooking.’

‘You are being dramatic Mrs. Mwape.’

I eye him letting go of his waist.

‘First this child is not going to be named after me, secondly I know you just want to be difficult because this little girl of mine loves whatever daddy cooks.’

I roll my eyes, he is right about his cooking because of late I can’t keep down food cooked by myself or anyone else except him. I can’t believe I am the one carrying the pregnancy yet his child is already favoring him over me.

‘You must be jealous not so?’ he asks with a grin on his face.

‘Ah leave me alone.’ I say going back to the chair.

He laughs and comes to kiss my lips lightly.

‘I love you Zara, so much.’

‘I love you too.’ I respond. This man makes me very happy, that is something I can’t take away.

‘You are smiling like a fool.’

‘You make me happy.’

‘I know. I am your happy pill.’

‘Ah whatever.’ I say and get up from the chair.

I go to the bathroom to pee, when I get there I open my phone. Zac has sent me a doctor’s number to use to terminate the pregnancy and a number of medication I can buy off the counter. I decide to delete the whole conversation and block him for the night. Zac and I need to have a serious conversation, he needs to understand that I agreed to get married to Thando because of our selfish reasons but I have fallen in love with him and I want to build a future with him.

I go back to the kitchen and find Thando busy on the phone, it’s on speaker.

‘Plus I have new spices that I would love to share with Zara, please come as early as you can.’ His mother says on the other end of the line.

‘Ma we have a life, we can’t be coming to your home in the early hours.’

‘I know son, but I want to spend as much time as I can with the both of you. In fact with Zara, I really don’t care much about you.’

‘Mother!’

‘What?’

‘How can you pick my wife over me? I am your child.’ He complains.

‘Well, it’s not my fault that you went ahead and married a woman that ticks all the boxes. Stop being jealous. In fact go and spend some time with her brother or something, just bring me my daughter and you can go about with your life.’

I excuse myself again, I always try to avoid his mother because her attitude towards me triggers a lot of things. My own mother never treated me like this, I don’t know how to act knowing this woman is a genuinely good person.

…

Kwenje’s Girl

Winnie

🙇🏾‍♀️