The Paragon of Eden

Deelia was suddenly lost again. She was falling back into her pit, and she found it strange that she was doing so with her girly outfit in a city to end all cities, probably a few steps from the nearest ice cream parlor. This wasn’t anything like the pirate base, and she should be happy. But now, she was without Hau.

Just then, she began to walk the other way. She looked at the stores she passed, seeing food vendors selling things she had never seen before and watching customers sweat over what she assumed was a very expensive product. There were little kids here and there, clinging to their parents or running around, ignoring them. They would hopefully never know the horrors this world has to offer, for Deelia remembered doing everything these people did here herself.

Could she do it again? Was that what made her happy in her previous life, and would it make her happy now? She could not stake her emotions on a single person, no matter how dedicated he seemed. What she needed now was a good sign that she was back home. As she walked, however, she began to feel lonely among the crowds. Here, she had no friends to laugh with. And Hau…

She walked into a store that resembled one she remembered visiting with her friends. It was a memorable experience, but she was not so sure why they were there. It was dark and smelled weird, and some of the products were lewd and questionable. And some of the things on sale were incomprehensible to her. She was always the most innocent in her circle of friends, and this store was where that became clear. She went deep into the racks of dark clothing here, looking for people who would see her the same way her friends had seen her. They had cherished her for who she was.

But three young men, near the age that Deelia was, crowded her path, facing her. She was out of sight, in the corner of the store. No one could see her here.

“Look who it is, showing up wherever you want,” one of them said. He wore his own leather jacket, but it had silver studs and loose belts. He was dressed mostly in black, like his friends, each a different flavor of the same brand. “Are you innocent?” They seemed to stare at her with condescending intrigue, though it wasn’t the hunger of the pirates.

Deelia responded dumbly. What was she supposed to do? She was only just remembering how to act again and--.

“Do you know where you are?” the same one said. He approached her, and the others smiled as they blocked the exit to the little corner. “I’ll show you where you belong…” He reached out with his arm and took hers, and with his other hand, he reached under her skirt.

“Phef!” Yelled an unseen man. His voice was nearly the same, but it carried a completely separate meaning. With its anger and disappointment, it shocked the man who held Deelia, and that shock turned into spite across his face, as clear as day. He released Deelia with no lack of force and stormed off, his two lackeys following. They revealed the other man, one who looked the exact same as Phef, though he wore a military jacket with badges and symbols.

As Phef passed the man, he bumped into him and forced his way through, though it would have been easy enough to walk around.

Deelia tried to stay calm, and she realized that this was not as bad as the pirates had been. Still, now that she knew how easy it was to lose everything, she held on a lot tighter to what she had. And there was Hau to help her, and now this figure…

He approached her, a stern look on his face. He was the same age as Phef, though he looked more refined. They were likely twins. “Excuse me,” he said. “You aren’t hurt, are you?”

Deelia realized how silly this suddenly was. Hurt? Maybe. But not by this Phef. Phef could never do what the pirates had done. This was nothing to worry about. And Hau…

She shook her head.

The man let out a sigh of relief. “I’m glad he didn’t get anywhere, but it’s a great shame that I have to be the one to apologize for him. People who know us don’t even realize we are twins anymore.” He looked away at where his twin had gone, in thought.

“Deelia,” Deelia said.

“I’m sorry?”

Deelia did not respond, and she felt stupid. It was the only thing she knew she could say. She had said it before, so it was safe. But no one could go around and just say their name and expect people to answer like they knew what she meant.

“Oh,” he said. “I’m Janue. Call me Jan, if you want. Are you sure you are fine?”

She nodded. Looking at him, she saw his short hair and the defined face he had. He was very handsome. Her friends would have sighed over him, and then they would stick through it to get over him. And they would never meet him like that, sitting in their chairs and just watching. But here she was, by sheer chance, and Janue was talking to her.

He held her arm now, much more delicately than Phef had. He inspected it, having noticed that something was off. “You…” he said. “Are you malnourished?”

Deelia looked down and blushed.

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Here, I’ll get you something to eat. Come on.” He went to leave the bizarre shop, and Deelia followed. There was a drop of subconscious doubt in her mind, but she ignored it. Food was food.

They walked for a short while, coming to a little bar with only five seats. It seemed like a place for only the most esoteric of tastes. Would she like it?

Janue ordered the food for her, not even looking at the small menu. As they sat there, next to each other, she looked around. Everybody could see them, clear as day. What would they think? Did they look like a couple? Were the other girls jealous? What would Hau think?

She felt guilty at the thought that Janue and Hau might fight over her, but then she was distracted as the food was quickly served. It was delicious, and she did not bother to hide her hunger and joy in eating whatever the white grains and fish and dark brown sauce were called.

“I knew there’d be someone else out there who enjoys this place,” Janue said. “But it isn’t mainstream yet, and maybe that’s a good thing. Let’s keep this place a secret, between you and me, why don’t we? It is a personal favorite, and I need to be sure with whoever I share it with.”

Deelia listened to the words he said, but she was very busy eating. She couldn’t respond, even if she wanted to.

“Hungry then, aren’t you? So it wasn’t anorexia or anything.” Janue looked at her after he said that. She gave a confused look, not quite knowing what he was talking about. He must have taken it differently. “I’m so sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t involve myself like that all the time.”

Deelia looked at him, worried that she had brought him trouble. She shook her head, guilty.

“No,” he said. “It’s my bad. It runs in my blood. You saw it in my brother, too, but he actually has a better reason to act that way. Not that there should be a reason at all, mind you. It’s just that, when you know how it really is, you might feel bad for him.”

Deelia looked at his badges. Was he a Warback pilot? Like Hau?

“My lineage has given either of the two of us a great opportunity: to pilot our family’s experimental Warback designs. Only one of us gets to do it, though, and I took on the responsibility better in the end. Phef still hates me for it, and I guess he took the anger out on you. All the private schooling went to me at an early age, and he believes that he wasn’t given a second chance. And despite that, I do feel contempt for him. I know you must have no end of it.”

Deelia enjoyed her food, and she was enjoying the company, but now she was full and fully clothed in her choice of fashion. Was this where she would be going next? Wherever Janue took her?

“I’ll walk you home. It’s getting late.”

Deelia didn’t have a home, but Janue took her by the hand.

“The crowds are getting intense. Hold on to me.”

She held his hand, but she felt lost. He wanted to take her to her home in the city, or maybe to his house if he found out she didn’t have one. And the thought of him finding out that she was homeless killed her a little. She was only a few steps away from losing all her dignity again. Was there anything desirable in her?

They passed by many stores again, but she couldn’t see them through the masses. They were heading to what must have been the large-scale method of transport for crossing the city, a series of twisting glass tubes with vehicles inside of them. Was this really it?

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw an ice cream parlor on a floor below them. They were just passing a stairway going down there, and she could see over the railing who sat by the tables there. Every other table was nearly full, but there was one with a single man sitting there. His long hair was struggling to find its way into one of the two cones he held. Hau.

Deelia took one look at Janue. He was perfect, but the things that Hau had seen of Deelia, it seemed that he must have understood her better. She let go.

As she went, she looked back again. He looked confused, even lost, looking around for her. He didn’t see her, and eventually, she lost sight of him.

After reaching the bottom of the stairs, she ran to the seat by Hau. He seemed to have been expecting her, though she did not see him looking her way on her way down.

“Deelia!” he said. “I got this for you.” He handed her a cone of green ice cream. She had never had this kind before, but as she tried it, she found what might have been her new favorite flavor.

They sat there for a while, watching the crowds pass. They may have looked like they belonged, but they weren’t residents here. They were the ones who were content to just watch it all go by. And, sitting there with her ice cream cone and Hau, and he with his cone, she felt comfortable.

“So,” he said, “What did you think of the Jonce Archology?”

Deelia looked down, still not quite ready to talk. “Home,” she said.

Hau looked at her, intrigued. “Like, it reminds you of home, or you want it to be your home?”

Deelia looked off into space. It was both. Should she bother to say that?

“Is it Eden?” Hau asked.

“No.”

Hau smiled. “I know. I also know that it tried to be. Here, away from all the war, advancing and living all on its own, is a society where everybody can be free and happy. Was everybody free and happy, Deelia?”

“No.”

“See, I have some views on what a Utopia might look like. Don’t laugh at me, I know it’s a stupid concept. After all these ages, it was never achieved. Not once. But I have an idea. And what makes this idea different from the rest, you might ask? Well, for one, its quirks are what make it work. All around you, I bet you see the resemblance to what you might call home. This place was actually built to seem like that to many more people than just you. Other sects out there are completely different, but people would feel much safer there if it was where they were from. Now, can you see the problem here?”

Deelia shook her head.

“Was your home a Utopia, Deelia?”

Home… “No,” she said. Not fully.

“So why would you look there to find perfection? I don’t get it. If you want to have something that has no flaws, it has to be different from anything you ever knew, completely alien and unknowable. Us humans have an uncanny ability to find flaws in everything if we know it for long enough, so something like this just wouldn’t work. You have to think outside the box, so to speak. Ever heard of that phrase? It means--.”

“I know what it means.”

“Whoa, Okay.” He smiled, and so Deelia smiled. “I’m glad you said something, Deelia. Anyway, it’s just a thought, and you humor me. Thanks. Wanna head back?”

To the Paragon. “Sure,” Deelia said. Was that okay? She was speaking. She couldn’t quite believe it, and it might take some more time to get used to. People were good at that, though. Even if it meant seeing the flaws in everything.

The two traveled back in the same fashion with which they arrived, but now their clothes were different, and their appetites were satisfied. The night never left, and the day never came. The city went dark in the distance as everybody went to bed. It wasn’t like that on her home world. Did everybody here have the same bedtime? Were they forced to go to sleep? Sure, that’s what a more natural world would be like, but it seemed almost a little dystopian, too manmade.

Deelia and Hau slept on their own time, too tired after the long day. Deelia hadn’t slept since being rescued from the pirates, and she hadn’t had a chance to calm down yet. Looking out the invisible wall of the Paragon, seeing the same stars that Hau could see, she felt right. They could talk about things together that nobody else could share. This was the way things were supposed to be going. Deelia was healing.