Chapter 12: Two months later
I went to tell Mom I was pregnant."
"Who is the father Cindy?"
"I would rather not say."
"Do you love him? Yes, I do."
"But, he doesn't love me."
"At least not enough to make me his girlfriend."
"I am going to keep my baby."
"I am glad to hear you say that."
"We will all help out as much as we can. Mom told me."
"I hate to hear what Dad has to say about it."
"He will want to kill Psycho for getting his baby girl pregnant and not taking responsibility for it."
"I continued to go to the clubhouse and help clean. But, I avoided Psycho as much as I could."
"I woke up five months later and realized I had to get some bigger shirts."
"I have not seen Psycho for four months."
"I don't care."
"I was finally home. Five months away was just too long."
"I missed Cindy. I want to see her face."
"I found her coming out of my bedroom with the dirty sheets and blankets. I pulled her against me and Kissed me. Then I felt her belly."
"I looked down and saw Red."
"Who the hell is the father he asked me."
"My mouth dropped open and then I slapped his face."
"Just what are you accusing me of Psycho?"
"You are the father you dumb wad."
"The hell I am. If I am get rid of it."
"I started screaming at Psycho and then I started to hit him with the brume handle."
"Mom came down the hall grabbing the brume away from me."
"What the hell are you doing? Cindy."
"That dume fucker accused me of sleeping with another man."
"When I told him he was the father he told me to get rid of it."
"It is a baby. I will not kill my child."
"Psycho I am finished with you."
"It has been two years since I fell in love with you but now, I have lost any feelings I had for you when you told me to kill our child."
"I turned and walked to the front door and walked out slamming the door behind me."
"Brothers were talking about who the father of my baby is."
"They will look at Psycho though knowing he is the only man I would let get that close to me."
"But nothing is being said about marriage."
I just got back from the doctor's office. And told mom I was having a girl."
"We are happy about that. We don't want another male in the family. At least not yet."
"I completely ignored Psycho as he was not there."
"I stayed away from him. If he was walking towards me I would walk across the street to get away from him."
I was now 7 months pregnant and really big. I can't even see my own feet."
"I was sitting on the rocking chair on our porch with my head laid back slowly rocking."
"I had my eyes closed but opened them to hear a member yelling for Psycho."
I looked over at him how much I hate him right now."
"He doesn't even want our baby."
"He had not even asked how I was doing."
"I ignore him when I can."
"I walked down the steps of our porch and slowly walked to the clubhouse."
I walked up the steps and opened the door.
"I walked over to talk to Mom and then I walked back across the street."
"I felt eyes watching me. I turned my head to see Psycho watching me. I gave him the finger. And continued to cross the street."
I heard she was having a girl."
"figures she can't even give me a son."
"I told a prospect that once and he frowned"
"What do you care if she has a boy or a girl?"
"After all you said the kid wasn't yours. or is it?"
"What did you do use her and kick her to the curb."
"I used to look up to you. I don't do that anymore."
"A real man would claim his woman and child."
"The last words Psycho said to me continued to run through my mind."
"I know now that He will never be in my life. Not as the boyfriend, or husband that I want."
I will have my baby and love her and raise her to be strong and a fighter."
"She won't need her father, she will have four uncles and a grandfather who will love her so much she won't need to think of her father."
It was two weeks later when I went to use the bathroom and saw a couple kissing in the hallway. When I got closer I saw Psycho pushing a whore against the wall and kissing her."
"I walked around them and practically ran into the restroom. When I came out I noticed Psycho leaning against the wall with his arms closed."
"Did you see enough Cindy?"
"More than I wanted to see if you must know."
"I then thought two of us can play that game."
We girls played spin the bottle Tammy dared me to kiss Killer in front of his brother."
"I walked over sat down on Killer's lap and we started to kiss."
Then I stood up and walked past Psycho and sat back down."
"Well, dam I didn't think you would do it."
"A dare is a dare."
"How does he kiss she asked. Almost as good as Psycho but not quite."
"Psycho can have you out of your clothes without you knowing it."
"He is the father of the baby isn't he Tammy asked me?"
"Yes, Psycho is the father. but he only wants me for a fuck buddy."
"No, he did not say that to you."
"Yes, Sara he did say exactly that."
"A member started telling the other brothers what Psycho said to me. And they were angry."
"He is one fucked up man, Tammy said."
"Well, I was used and thrown out as yesterday's trash."
"I am dealing with it."
"He doesn't want to accept his child so be it. We do not need him."
"I stood up and told the girls good night and I went home."
Raymond followed Cindy.
"Cindy, is Psycho the father?"
"Yes, he is Raymond."
"But he doesn't want me for a girlfriend or a wife. He only wants a fuck buddy. I told him no."