The Christmas List: A Novel

By ten o’clock Sara’s pain had clearly grown more intense. Kier couldn’t stand watching her suffer.

“The nurse will give you more medication.”

“No,” Sara said, “not until Jimmy gets here.”

Jimmy and Juliet arrived a little before eleven. Jimmy went straight to Sara’s side, his face tight with anxiety. Juliet stopped and looked around at all the flowers. “Oh my. They’re beautiful.”

Sara looked lovingly at her son and took his hand. “I’m sorry I let you down, darling, I tried to make it to your wedding.”

“Mom, you’ve never let me down.” He started to cry. “You’ve never let me down. You’ve always been there for me. I love you.”

“I love you, Jimmy. I need you to trust me now. I need you to promise me two things.”

“Anything.”

“First.” She stopped, letting a wave of nausea pass. “First, give your father a chance. Open your heart to him. Promise me.”

He looked at his father, then back at her. “I promise.”

“Good,” she said with relief. “Good. Now where is Juliet?”

Juliet was leaning against Jimmy. She stepped forward, grasping Sara’s hand. “I’m here, Mom.”

Sara took Juliet’s hand. “Promise me that you won’t delay your wedding. I will be there, you just won’t see me.”

Juliet looked at Jimmy, both of them in tears.

“We promise,” Jimmy said.

“We promise,” Juliet echoed.

Sara exhaled. “Thank you.” She grimaced with pain. Kier squeezed her hand, then went out and got the nurse. She came in carrying a bottle filled with amber liquid and placed a few drops under Sara’s tongue. She checked her blood pressure then left the room. Sara’s eyes closed and her face relaxed as the drug took effect. The three of them sat next to Sara, keeping a silent vigil. At midnight the grandfather clock in the home’s lobby chimed. Kier said, “Merry Christmas, my love.”

Sara’s eyes fluttered opened. She looked around the room as if trying to remember where she was. Then she spoke softly. “Is it Christmas?”

“Yes.”

Her words came slow and slurred, but still distinguishable. “We made it.”

Kier struggled to control his voice. “Happy twenty-fifth anniversary.”

Sara smiled. A few minutes later she fell asleep and her breathing became shallower. At 1:47 she opened her eyes, and looked up into the corner of the room. She said, “Mom.”

All three of them looked to where she gazed, but saw nothing. They knew it would be soon.

Kier held her hand tightly, as if he could keep her with him by force of will. Just before she went her eyes opened once more and she looked at him. She held his hand with the last of her strength, then her grip relaxed. Kier leaned over and kissed her forehead. Then he dropped his head to her breast and wept.