The Chameleon Shop

Running in sand is almost as bad as running in water. You put immense effort into it, but get very little result. Kaylee could see the huge old galleon ship up ahead, but by the way men were shouting and throwing off ropes, it looked like it was going to be setting sail very soon. She had to catch them. She couldn’t bear the idea of dodging Lolita on this small island. She liked the idea of becoming a cute doll with red Chucks, propped up on Lolita’s shelf, even less.

‘Hey,’ she shouted between her cupped palms, but she was almost out of breath. ‘Hey, wait!’ She waved her arms and one of the men noticed and waved back. She stopped running and bent over her knees, panting and dying of thirst, a painful stitch in her side and heart pounding in her eardrums. After she’d gotten her breath back a little, Kaylee half-walked, half-jogged up the beach towards the galleon ship. Her jeans were now full of sand and chaffing every nook and cranny, but she felt sure that they would wait for her.

She marvelled at the size of the huge wooden vessel as she walked alongside it. Huge white sails flapped loudly, smacking the breeze like wet tea towels. A black flag flew from the highest mast decorated appropriately with white skull and crossbones which stared down on her with menace.

The combined smells of wet wood, seaweed and fish were almost overpowering in the morning heat. She noticed the figurehead on the bow of the ship was your typical beautiful and busty woman. ‘Pffft!’ she said. ‘Men!’

It occurred to her briefly that she could be leaping from the frying pan, into the fire. If that were the case, then she guessed she would just have to be leaping off the ship, taking her chances with the sharks and praying that her turtle friend was still nearby.

There was a rope ladder hanging down the side of the old wooden galleon and a smiling, bearded man with a black eye-patch waiting at the top. He gestured with his hand ─ she half expected it to be a hook ─ for Kaylee to climb on up, helping her over the rail when she reached the top. It was a long way up, at least two stories above ground. She looked across to Lolita’s hut, but there was no sign of the woman. She hoped the old woman was still fast asleep.

‘Well hello. Who would you be then, young lady?’ He asked Kaylee as she stood feeling rather stupid and vulnerable, but also relieved to be leaving the island.

‘My name is Kaylee. I need to get off this island. There’s a woman ...’ she looked back towards Lolita’s hut, leaving the explanation hanging. She gave the sailor an earnest look, ‘Where does this ship sail to?’

‘It sails to the dock at the borders of the Spirit Lands, love. You’re a very smart girl getting away from Lolita. Many before you were not so lucky, so we’ve heard. Come along with me. Meet Captain Riordan. We call him Pinky.’

Kaylee raised her eyebrows, ‘You do? To his face?’

‘Ha, ha. You’ll see why when you meet him. He is a good Captain and a fair and genial chappy to boot. We’ll see if he’ll give you a nice cool cider and find a safe spot for you to sit and enjoy the fresh sea air while we finish casting off.’

The pirate who helped her up the ladder introduced himself as Bob. Bob was tall and gangly, with tanned brown skin like leather and had a blue scarf tied round his head in lieu of a hat. As they walked across the slightly bobbing deck, which made Kaylee feel a little bit woozy, he pointed out several other pirates. However, Kaylee had never been good at remembering names, forgetting them almost as soon as she was introduced to the next man. She smiled nicely and nodded, hoping they would take pity on her and let her sail with them to the ports of the Spirit Lands, even though she had no money with which to pay them.

Bob also pointed out the barrels of Pure Crystalline Clear Water, filled from the crystal springs on many of these islands.

‘We’re forced to sell it all to Wilfrey, who adds his share to the price before he robs the other realms, at a great profit to himself. ’

‘So I’ve heard. That’s so unfair. Is there nowhere else they can get water?’ Kaylee asked him.

’There was ’til he started messing with the land, blocking up dams and such. Now with the droughts and such ... well, people gotta have that water don’t they. He’s got ‘em by the ... Oh look, here’s Pinky now.’

‘Well, well, who’ve you got here, Bob?’ Captain Riordan smiled at Kaylee, his rosy cheeks reminding her of Santa Claus.

Bob said, ‘This would be Kaylee. She almost ran afoul of ol’ Lolita on the island and needs to get back to the mainland. Somethin’ about urgent business with the Dragon she was telling me earlier.’ He looked very serious and important, acting as though they were transporting an important Royal Dignitary.

Captain Riordan was completely white ─ white hair beneath his black tricorn hat and white skin glared out from his uniform where the sleeves ended; everything except his eyes. These were a very odd pink colour. Albino, Kaylee believed was the name for it. Sometimes even animals were albino with odd colourings like this.

Kaylee put her hand out respectfully, ‘Hello.’

‘Hello there, Kaylee. You want to see the dragon you say?’ He was smirking as if she was having a joke with him.

‘Yes, Sir. Yes I do.’ She grinned. She was used to everyone in these lands thinking she was crazy by now and just smiled along with them because she simply did not care anymore what anyone else thought. It was something she must do. Fate and that key of course, had brought her here. Her and nobody else, so it simply had to mean she was someone special for some reason and destined to be here.

The Captain erupted with a loud booming laugh that echoed off the cliff tops of the small islands they were sailing past. He laughed until he was out of breath, then paused smiling broadly and when he looked at Kaylee, off he went again, with that loud booming laughter. It was very contagious and Kaylee giggled a bit in response. Bob shook his head and smiled, obviously familiar with the Captains laugh.

‘Ah boy! I can’t breathe ... I can’t breathe ... ha ha ha.’ He bent over holding his belly until he gained control of himself again. With a little difficulty, he pulled a serious face, ‘Well, young Kaylee. Who am I to reject such a request from such a brave young adventurous soul? Yes my dear, we have room to take you to the docks of the Spirit Lands. Bob, take her to my cabin and give the girl some refreshments. I’m sure we can find her a safe place to sit and see the sights on our journey.’

‘Aye, aye Captain!’ Bob replied, saluting.

The other pirates had been singing a merry song to help the work along as they hoisted sails and ropes, rolled barrels up ramps, scrubbed the decks and numerous other nautical chores she did not understand.

One pirate, not watching where he was going, stepped backwards into someone else’s bucket where his boot became stuck. He clanged noisily around the deck, in an unsuccessful attempt to remove it.

All the noise he was making caught the attention of the Captain. Captain Riordan approached with a stern face and the crew fell quiet.

‘Barney, you Wally!’ Captain Riordan shouted. ‘I think you deserve the Frock of Shame? What do you say pirates?’

‘YEAH!’ they shouted rather ominously. Barney looked sheepishly annoyed but resigned to his fate.

Kaylee was a bit worried for poor unfortunate Barney with the bucket still stuck to his foot. She watched as two pirates emerged from below deck with a bundle of lacy pink material. Barney blushed crimson to match the woman’s pink frilly dress they pulled over his head and topped it off with a wide brimmed sun hat, along with some red lipstick.

Not satisfied with that level of humiliation, they also pulled the bucket off his foot, and then picked him up, dumping him feet first and neck deep in a large barrel of fish and water. He gasped at the sudden cold wetness and shook his head like a dog, spattering anyone close with droplets. Now the men took turns at throwing fish at him, as well as the occasional octopus and even a few smelly socks some mischievous pirate had dug up.

Oh well, Kaylee thought, if that’s the worst he is getting, that’s not so bad. ‘At least he didn’t have to walk the plank.’ She said, quietly, but one of the pirates still heard her.

‘Good idea, Kaylee,’ he shouted, ’the guest of honour says make ‘im walk the plank! Come on lads!’

Kaylee felt awful, she couldn’t let them do that and blurted the first thing to enter her mind, ‘No, I didn’t say that. Isn’t it bad luck to make someone walk the plank before you cast off? Besides, that dress is too pretty to ruin. I say get him to sing us a song instead?’

They were a genial crew and easily persuaded to her idea. With relief, Barney avoided another cold dunking.

Kaylee was sitting at the Captains table sipping cider and munching on a nice cheese stick Bob had given her, laughing along with the men still pelting Barney with smelly fish; his singing was pretty awful!

She saw out of the corner of her eye, a sleek brown shape swimming towards her side of the ship. She thought at first that it was a seal. However, as it began to claw its way up the big chunky, seaweed-covered rings of the anchor, she could now see it was a large, wet cat. The cat crawled easily up the anchor, all the way to the rails at the top, which it then sat on, tail twitching and turquoise-blue eyes creased in mischief.

The big cat was watching the pirates, like they were little birdies on the lawn but before Kaylee could think what to say or do, the huge black and brown moggie flew through the air, pouncing on one of the pirates and pinning the surprised man to the deck.

Now given Kaylee’s first meeting with Jett and the wrong impression he had given her, she shouldn’t have worried. That said, in the heat of the moment, she let out a very girly squeal and dropped her pint of cider, splashing it all up her legs.

‘Oh gerr-off Pearl! Or no bloody fish for you today!’ Evidently, he was used to her pranks, but she was too big and powerful to argue with, as well as being another Messenger Cat and therefore very important in the Realms. They had no choice but to tolerate her idiosyncrasies.

Pearl smelled the fish all over the deck. After forcing Barney, very apprehensively to submit to Pearl licking the fish-oil off his face, she lifted her front paws to the rim of the barrel and tipped it over the deck scattering Barney and fish everywhere.

Barney was cold and feeling a bit ill by now, so he was actually rather grateful to the Messenger Cat for causing this distraction. He scrambled to his feet, dropping his wide-brimmed sunhat, slipping and sliding in the oily water and finally waddled off to his quarters in his sopping wet, fishy-smelling, pink frilly dress suffering more jeers and laughter from his comrades as he did so.

Pearl had scoffed down quite a few of the scattered fish before noticing Kaylee watching from the door of the Captain’s cabin. She popped her head up alert and curious, before she slinked up and around Kaylee, thoroughly checking her out. This routine was now becoming all too familiar to Kaylee who had already met the other four Messenger Cats. ‘Hello, Pearl?’ Kaylee said ‘Is that what they call you?’

‘It is, among other things not fit for a young girl’s ears. Nevertheless, you may call me Pearl. And you are?’

‘My name is Kaylee. You’re another Messenger Cat, aren’t you?’

‘I am ... and what would you be? Which realm are you from?’ Pearl hopped up onto the cabin roof in one bound with another large mouth full of fish and continued her snack.

Keeping it brief and to the point Kaylee filled Pearl in on her adventure so far ending with her recent close call with Lolita on the island they’d just set sail from. As they chatted, from time to time a pirate would wander beneath the roof of the cabin Pearl was lying on. She could not resist casually reaching out her paw, delicately plucking their hats from their heads and flicking them overboard into the choppy waves several feet below deck.

The men looked quite annoyed as they climbed down the ladder into a dingy to rescue their hats back, but did not dare say a thing. Some just gave it up and waved it off as their loss; easier to buy a new one once they reached the village.

The men began to sing a song and Kaylee’s ear caught the familiar name so she listened in.

“Wilfrey, Wilfrey, what a man is he,

Won’t find another, in the deep blue sea,

’E runs like a fairy and smells like Pearl” Pearl snarled ‘Hey!’

“Dresses like a dandy and he hits like a girl!” To which Kaylee also shouted, ‘Hey!’

The pirates laughed and smacked each other on the backs as they climbed up the riggings, enjoying their work. ‘Why don’t you go deliver some messages, Pearl?’ one cheeky bugger with his shirt off, called out.

‘Why don’t you go put a shirt on, before you poke somebody’s eye out?’ Pearl called back to him. There was never a dull moment on this ship.

Pearl talked with Kaylee, who climbed up to join her on the cabin roof, about her escape from the woman Lolita. ‘Funny one, that one,’ Pearl said.

‘Yes she is a bit odd. Are those children, the dolls I mean ... are they all dead then, do you think? Is there nothing we can do for them?’ Kaylee looked sad, thinking of how close she came to becoming one of them.

‘Who knows? One would hope they might still be saved, somehow. As to the how of it ... we shall have to wait and see, wont we?’ Pearl said.

Then Kaylee told of the naughty gnome Ricky sending her down the wrong tunnel, which led to the polluted part of the Bay.

Pearl laughed as she picked her teeth free of fish with a sharp bone. ‘Don’t you be scared of those gnomes. Annoying little buggers, they are. I will take you back to the cave entrance and when you find that Ricky, you kick his butt for me.’ She did a jaw-cracking yawn and stretched, arching her long sleek back which had dried considerably in the warm sun. She jumped down to the deck with a thud and plodded off into the Captain’s cabin. Kaylee lay on her stomach and peeked over the edge curiously to see Pearl on the captain’s bed plucking his quilts and purring, settling in for the duration by the looks of things.

Kaylee giggled but was certain the Captain was not going to be very pleased. She turned to see the man himself approaching and cringed.

‘What the ...? Where? Oh no!’ he fumed, grabbing his black tricorn hat and crushing it in frustration, but had to stifle his complaints. ‘Pearl, you’re gonna make my bed smell all fishy again, darn it!’

He noticed Kaylee hanging upside down from his cabin roof. Resigning himself to the fact that his bed was Pearl’s for now, he said to Kaylee, ‘Would you like to have a go at the helm, Kaylee?’

She smiled, ‘Sail the ship you mean?’

‘Sure, why not? It’s my ship isn’t it?’

She swung down from the cabin roof as if it was a monkey-bar at school and followed the Captain up the front of the ship where the helm stood.

The helm was a beautiful piece of woodturning. It was worn smooth from all the loving hands that had steered the ship. She held it where the Captain showed her and would adjust it slightly in directions as he instructed. The feeling of exhilaration in controlling this large glorious vessel helped Kaylee understand why these men behaved the way they did.

‘Good girl, Kaylee, you’re doing well. There’s only one thing you’re not doing right,’ Captain Riordan told her.

‘What am I not doing right?’ She was puzzled. She’d listened carefully and was sure she’d followed everything he had said.

’You’ve got to yell at the men now and again, like this, “Get to work ya worthless seadogs! Scrub those decks again or ye’ll be walking the plank!” See them scurry about like wee mousies.’ He laughed heartily slapping his thigh in his mirth.

‘I can’t do that,’ Kaylee said, shocked. ‘They’ll get angry at me.’

‘No they won’t.’ He smiled. ‘They love it. Makes them feel like genuine pirates ya see?’

Kaylee said, ‘Alright, I’ll try it then.’ She hollered out in her best Shepherds voice, ’What are ya looking at, ya lazy buggers! Get back ta work!’

The pirates stopped silent and stared at the twelve-year-old girl and for a moment, she felt like she had suddenly shrunken to the size of a pea, about to be stepped on and squashed. Nevertheless, it was all right, because they burst out laughing and carried on with their work, saluting and waving to the Captain and Kaylee.

The Captain nodded, ‘See, I told you. Feel free to have a wander around deck. Watch out for that lot though. They throw things around the place; you’re likely to get skittled by something if you aren’t paying close attention.’

Kaylee headed further towards the front of the ship. At the bow she gripped the railings tight, looked down and was delighted to see a pod of dolphins playfully racing the ship, diving in and out of the bow waves. She was struck by an idea.

Grinning mischievously, she climbed to the railings as close as possible to the bow of the ship. Gripping her thighs tight around the railings, she then put her arms out like wings, shouting at the top of her lungs, ‘I’m the King of the World!’ Dramatic Titanic music by Celine Dion, nobody else could hear, was playing inside her head.

This was fun for a short while until, strangely, the ship felt as though it was slowing down and coming to a stop.

‘Is something broken?’ Kaylee called out to a pirate on deck, grateful there were no icebergs in this tropical part of the realms.

‘No love, just,’ he waved randomly about, ’there’s no wind. No wind means we ’ave to just ... wait I s’pose. Unless you feel like coming down ‘ere and givin’ me a hand scrubbing these decks?’

‘Nah, I’m good.’ She grinned cheekily back at him.

She climbed down from the dangerous place she had just been, thinking her mother would’ve had kittens if she’d seen her up there and grateful that she’d been safe back in New Zealand.

Only, she wasn’t truly grateful about that. She was sad to be honest. It would have been worth a telling off to have her mother with her right now.

The wind picked up again within the hour and they were sailing along at a good speed. The sea air was wonderful, but did make her tired not to mention ravenously hungry. Kaylee was sitting quietly by a brazier, finishing a plate of hot fish and some baked potatoes the Captain had sent out for her, waiting for them to arrive at the docks.

On impulse, she pulled the iron key from her backpack. Next to the fire burning in the brazier, she thought of her poor worried mum. ‘I’m sorry, Mum, please forgive me. I didn’t mean to worry you.’ The key began to hum and glow green, as it had at the stone cottage. ‘Hey, I wonder if ─’.

Fate intervened at that very moment when a whale decided to surface alongside the ship. It sent up a waterspout, high into the air. The fountain of seawater washed over the railing, flooding and extinguishing the fire in the brazier.

As it hissed, red coals dying in the steam, Kaylee was beginning to have an idea of how she ‘might’ be able to return home.

From high above her head a pirate in the crows-nest yelled, ‘Land Ho!’

She jumped up to the railings to see the dock closing in fast, beyond that, the familiar luscious forest of giant trees. With the ominous Mount Beaton brooding to their right.

‘Here’s our stop,’ Pearl rubbed affectionately passed her legs. ‘Grab your things, Kaylee; the small boat will take us out to the docks. The cave is not far from here. You’ll want to get there before dark, won’t you?’