Chapter 19
APRIL
‘Three more cases of a mysterious poisoning were admitted to hospital today. The Health units are unclear and the victims are unable to tell them what the substance is. They assure the public that it is not a virus and therefore not contagious. The substance has claimed 4 lives since its discovery 5 months ago. Officials say the victims appear to be overdosing on a chemical that can’t be identified through any database. ‘We are investigating and taking every measure possible to contain the outbreak. We have contacted the Security Complex and are awaiting answers. We want to remind the public to not inject or ingest anything that you are unfamiliar with. Again, these are isolated cases and the public is not at risk.’ We'll have more on this after the break.’
“Tragic.” I flip the radio off as I turn onto my dark street. After meetings and grading papers, I’m happy to be home. I pull into my driveway and eye Finns truck. I asked him to take Ben home for me. I didn’t expect him to stay.
I walk in the door and the house lights are dimmed.
“BEN! I’M HOME!” I yell up the stairs as I hang my purse and kick off my heels.
“He's…He's upstairs.”
I look down the hall and Finn is standing in the doorway of my living room. There’s a soft glow of light behind him. His white sweater has the sleeves pulled and he has his hands in the pockets of his Blue jeans. A little smile pulls at my lips at the way the light plays on his body. He smiles and looks down at the floor.
“What’s this?” I ask as I slowly walk up the hall.
He ticks his head. “I did what I said. I talked to Ben today. Apologized for being an ass and now…” He takes a deep breath.
He steps aside and my living room is filled with the glow of candles. A dinner setting is set up on the floor picnic style. There’s roses in a vase and my jaw drops.
“Finley.” I breathe as I look over the room.
He takes my coat off and leans to my ear. “A home cooked meal complete with sparkling apple juice.” He grins.
I eye him suspiciously. “What did you do?”
“Nothing.” He chuckles. “I thought…I’m staring over with Ben…I want to start over with you.”
I feel my cheeks heat. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me until you’ve tasted my cooking.” He laughs.
“I’ve tasted your cooking, Finn.” I smirk.
“I promise I read the recipe to the letter.” He smiles and leads me into the room. He sits me down and pours me a drink in a flute glass. “For you.” He hands it to me.
I take a sip. “Yep. It’s apple juice.” I grin.
“The good stuff.” He winks.
I giggle and shake my head.
He serves dinner and sits beside me.
As we eat the steak and caper salad he cooked from scratch. We catch up and talk about old times. It’s been a long time since we did this. Just hung out with nothing in the way. This used to be a regular thing with us, but then life happened and it all ended. I’m glad he planned this tonight.
“Finn. This is amazing.” I say as I chew.
He chuckles. “I’m glad you like it.” He takes his napkin and some sauce off my lips.
I cover my lips. “Sorry.” I giggle.
“It's OK.” He says as he leans back on his hand.
“Seriously, thank you. For the this and the talk with Ben.” I lock his gaze and smile.
He reaches up and tucks my hair behind my ear. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gotten mad at you like I did. You have every right to tell me when I’m stepping over boundaries. I don’t have the right to act like that. Bunny, I…I want a third chance.” His brows stitch up as he asks.
I look down at my lap. “Finn.”
He sits up. “I know you’re scared. I don’t expect complete commitment or anything. I just…I’ve been thinking that I need to change some things and one of those things is getting off the bench. I want to play in your starting line up, bunny. I want to be your wingman. I’ve always wanted that. I don’t know exactly what went wrong, but I really feel I can get it this time.”
I face him and swallow. “Finn…I still don’t want to share.”
“You don’t have to. It’s just a job. I can do this right.” He cups my cheek and places his forehead on mine. “I love you, April. That’s one thing that's never changed.” He gently rubs my bottom lip with his thumb.
“It’s not just a job, Finn. It’s your life. You can’t love me and love the game at the same time.” I whisper.
“I can. I swear I can. Just give me a chance.” He pleads.
I look down and back up to his eyes. “Can I sleep on it?”
He smiles. “Yes. I’ll be here when you’re ready to answer.”
“I hope so.” I chew my lip.
“Things will be different. I love you.” His lips caress mine and my lips part. He pulls me into him as he deepens the kiss.
He holds the back of my head and my heart skips beats.
I do have feelings for Finn, but I promised myself a long time ago that it would never turn to love again. For Ben’s sake, I couldn’t invest in that again. Each time we try, it ends in a messy disaster.
But he feels different. Maybe he’s going through something, maybe not. Either way I will think about it. The thought has crossed my mind several times.
The way he’s kissing me now, makes my heart ache. I miss this. I truly do.
His hands glide down my back. He scoops my ass up and pulls me into his lap.
I feel my middle heat up as he sucks my bottom lip. His hand slide up the back of my shirt and his warm touch on my skin makes me even more weak. He unhooks my bra as he kisses my neck and ear.
I pull back and slowly pull off my shirt and bra.
His eyes connect with mine and he pulls my lips to his.
He cups my breast and holds my hair. I moan on his lips and he moves to the back of my skirt. He pulls the zipper down slowly then tucks his hand into the open slit. He grabs my ass and squeezes my cheek.
I roll my head back and his lips travel around my skin. He bites my nipples and I moan just a little louder.
He sits up and pulls his sweater off.
I kiss him again as I feel his hard, cut muscles.
I hold his cheeks and lift myself up. He peels off my panties and skirt. I settle back in his lap and he finds my slit. I’m soaked from my arousal and rubs my pussy up and down slowly.
I quietly moan through our kiss. He rubs my clit and slides a finger into my entrance. As I kiss him harder, he pops his jeans open. He props himself up and pulls them down and off with his boxers.
He pulls me in and rubs my pussy harder. I whimper and moan on his mouth, trying to be quiet for my son upstairs.
I grip his head a little harder as I feel my climax build. My fire builds and my legs shake.
“Yes, bunny…” He whispers. “Come for me.”
Moaning with my lips shut, my orgasm explodes. He rubs me even faster, then fists his dick and lines up. He shoves himself in and I let go an extremely shaky breath with a whine.
He pulls me up and pushes me down on his length. I bury my head in his neck and he holds my head.
“Yes, baby…You’re so good.” He says as he holds my ass.
He thrusts into my pussy faster and I muffle my moans on his skin.
“God, yes…Finnn…”
He moves my hair. “You’re so damn beautiful…” He bruises my lips and fists my hair.
His strokes hit harder and faster. My hips match his speed perfectly. I feel my pussy tighten around his solid dick and I bite his bottom lip.
“Yessss….” I whine.
“Damn bunny…Fuck…” He slams me deeper and I bounce harder. He holds my ass with both hands and helps with more thrust.
My orgasm crashes through and he growls on my lips. He slaps my ass and pushes me down even harder. We're breathing heavy and our hearts are pounding together. The heat from our bodies create a sheen of sweat that glows in the candle light.
His muscles tense and his chest vibrates with a growl.
I feel his dick swell and he pounds his release into my pussy with quiet grunts.
I wanted to stop him, but he felt so good inside me, I didn’t want this to end.
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to start with Finn again. I want to, I’m just scared that he won’t change and I need more. Ben needs more. I’m not sure Finn will ever get that. I try to tell him, but he’s so defensive about being compared to his father.
Still, these special moments, I feel like I need them. I won’t turn them down because I want them so bad. Finn’s the only one I can love other than Kyle.
He slows down and kisses me passionately. He picks me up as he stands. “Let’s go to bed.” He mumbles on my lips and carries me upstairs, kissing me the whole way.
It was a long, passion filled night and I loved every second of it. This is the Finn I need. The Finn I want. I can only hope he means what he says because I’m afraid I’ll never see this Finn again if he doesn’t.
****
The morning sun played on my eyelids as my alarm went off. I reach over and shut it off.
A smile fills my lips as I roll over. It fades as I realize my beds empty.
I sit up and get out of bed. I throw a robe on and see my clothes in a pile on the floor. I pick them up and put them in the hamper.
I walk to the bathroom and Finns not there.
My lips fall as I walk out of my bedroom and down the stairs. I walk down the hall and he’s not in the kitchen.
I head to the living room. Dinners cleaned up and his clothes are gone.
I slowly nod as I walk to the front of the house. His trucks gone.
I look at the floor as I turn and head back upstairs. In my room, I pick up my phone and sit on my bed.
I take a deep breath and open it to my messages. There’s nothing. He’s just gone.
I bite my top lip as I try to figure out how to feel.
I shake my head and look out my window.
“I’m done.”
I thump my phone onto my bed and go for a shower.
I can’t do this anymore. The constant emotional rollercoaster is too much. When I see him next, I’m telling him we are never happening again. It’s over.