Chapter |23|
“Hi, I’ve been looking all over for you,” his eyes widened as he took in the room and all the filing cabinets that lined the walls, along with stacks of books and an old map stretched out on a sagging desk.
“Then I must’ve done a pretty good job of laying low.”
“Low indeed,” he stepped over a pile and leaned on the table, frowning down at her where she sat on the floor. “I haven’t seen you since this morning.”
He’d taken to being her guard dog outside her room every night, and she’d slipped past him as soon as she’d woken up. It was a little unsettling having him so close, but while her mind couldn’t sleep easier, her body wasn’t protesting the close proximity of her mate while she slept.
“Well, you can sense I’m ok, right? No need to see me,” she brushed him off with a shrug.
He wouldn’t be deterred so easily. “But what if I want to see my mate? Spend time with you, and...get to know you?”
She quickly looked up from what she had been writing and studied his face instead.
“What do you mean?” she carefully took note of his mood. It was ...different. Sincere maybe? A bit playful, and judging by the grin growing on his handsome face, she’d have to be careful of this new side to him.
“You’ll have to see,” he smiled and held out his hand.
The smile wasn’t so cocky as she’d seen it before, not the smug demeanour that hinted at something else. Instead it was genuine and real almost. Like he actually wanted to just be with her like normal friends.
“Umm I’ve got work to do, can this wait?” She looked around her with a frown, not really wanting to emerge from her boring yet safe cocoon just yet.
“The sun is setting, so no, it can’t wait.” He wiggled his fingers, motioning her up.
“But I’m a mess, I haven’t even combed my hair since my run this morning,” she clutched at reasons and pulled her shield of papers closer to her chest even as her wolf was begging her to get her stubborn backside off the floor and join her mate.
“I won’t bother telling you how stunning you look,” he leaned down and snatched at her hands.
“Oh you’re only saying that,” she rolled her eyes and ducked from his grasp.
“Don’t make me come down there,” he warned with a chuckle, and she squealed as he picked up the entire desk. Pushing it to the side, he knelt down and snagged her ankle before she could crawl away. Her giggles filled the air as she twisted and bumped her head on the nearest cabinet.
“Ow,” she kicked out at him and he fumbled and lost his balance. He landed heavily beside her, bumping his head on the same cabinet. They both couldn’t contain the laughs and she slapped her hand on his chest.
“Happy now?” she smiled at him, his eyes full of amusement.
“Well, not really what I had planned, but it’s a start,” he clasped his hand over hers, lifting it to his lips before placing a smooch on her skin.
The sparks that erupted from more than a gentle touch made her gasp. Staring into his eyes, the joking mood settled and she found herself sinking deeper and deeper into someplace warm and cosy. Someplace she wanted to spend the rest of her life exploring. Her mate’s heart. That could only be the best word to describe the emotion pouring from him to her in that single, powerful gaze.
He leaned closer, eliminating the gaping chasm that was slowly getting smaller the longer she spent with him. His breath sent tendrils of secrets whispering across her face, beckoning her to get closer and hear them first-hand. She couldn’t help looking down at his lips, and his Adam’s apple that bobbed as he swallowed hard. She did the same and backed up.
“Umm— you said the sun...was setting?” she mumbled, trying to catch her breath and her runaway thoughts.
“Oh, yeah. Come on, I’ve got something cool to show you,” his cheeky smile was back and a feeling of relief mixed with too much regret washed over her. She’d dodged a bullet—a kiss that could’ve ended who knows where—but maybe she wanted that? Maybe this wave of desire was meant to wash her somewhere good, somewhere safe. Was Kaiden safe?
She had no time to contemplate that strange thought further as he pulled her to her feet and out of the storeroom that sat in the far reaches of the castle.
Leading her out into the sunshine and across the courtyard, she asked him again where he was taking her, but he just laughed excitedly and told her to have patience. She did like surprises, didn’t she?
Long grass swished around their ankles as he pulled her up the hill that overlooked the lake. His fingers squeezed hers, and her heart did a funny little dance despite her best intentions to keep this platonic. Nothing could be platonic with a mate though, she allowed herself to admit.
They reached the top eventually, and she raised her eyebrows in surprise at the picnic blanket that was laid out under the big spreading tree that had been growing there for years.
“I hope you like vege lasagna and carrot salad. It was all I could sneak out of the kitchen,” he asked. Pulling her forwards, he pointed out a basket that had serviettes sticking out of the top.
“I love lasagna,” she knelt down and opened the basket as he dropped to his knees across from her. “Chocolate cupcakes?” she peered back up at him with raised eyebrows after inspecting the contents of the basket.
“Alright, Destine may have helped me pack this,” he grinned sheepishly. “And she told me how much you loooove chocolate,” he waved his hands dramatically.
“I do! Thanks,” She lifted her eyes to his before dropping them quickly, unsure if she could handle the strong emotion pouring from them, like back in the storeroom. There was something growing between them, and she wasn’t sure if she was ready for it.
They ate for a few minutes, discussing mundane stuff like the weather, and if the climate here was much different from his pack. His territory was less country and more city, lower down in altitude and closer the equator so the seasons were milder. He loved the snow that had blanketed her territory a few weeks ago, and admitted he had never built a snowman. Chesca assured him he hadn’t yet lived until he’d made a snow fort and been terrorised in a snowball fight. His warm laugh did something to lighten her mood and release the tension in her shoulders. They moved onto deeper topics, and she couldn’t remember when she had last talked to someone so freely. The golden hues of the setting sun glinted softly in his dark curls, giving them hints of caramel and ombré reds. At one point her fingers had a mind of their own and brushed a strand of his hair back from over his forehead. He paused mid-sentence and stared at her as if she’d just sprouted horns. Or grown angel wings and a halo. His hand caught hers and he pressed it to his lips, the second time that day. The warm tingly feelings had her itching for more, but his words shifted her thoughts.
“Did you always look forward to being Alpha?”
“Um, excuse me?” She didn’t quite understand his question.
“Well, you do the job quite admirably, and with such enthusiasm I can only assume you trained hard and with such passion. You look like you really enjoy the hard work.”
“Oh, no! I mean, I enjoy it, yes. But I wasn’t always—I mean… I was never meant ...to be Alpha,” she stuttered, the last words squeezed out softly like she wasn’t sure if she should have said them.
“What do you mean?” He frowned. “You… weren’t in line to be alpha? You had an older brother?”
“Something like that,” she murmured and looked out at the view. The sun’s last rays were illuminating the mountain range and it always amazed her. “To put it plainly, the job sort of landed in my lap after...well, because of many different reasons, and I cared about my pack too much to not give them my best. I have to work hard because only I know what they really need and how to make the tough decisions. No one else cares for them like I do…” she studied the grass at her feet and shook her head to get rid of past memories.
“So your parents died...as well as an older sibling?” he asked again, carefully though obviously trying to figure her out.
“I’d rather not talk about it,” she pulled her knees to her chin and wrapped her arms around them. “What about you?” she pushed her long hair over her shoulder and looked at him with a smile, “what did you want to be when you grew up? besides an alpha I mean.”
“Well, alpha was pretty much the done deal. No question what I’d be.”
“I know...” she tilted her head, having successfully changed the subject. “But if you could have been anything, whatever you wanted, what would it have been?
“Well,” Kaiden pursed his lips and took a deep breath, thinking deeply while staring up at the tree leaves above as though the answer was written there. “Metal work. I always wished I had more time to make things with metal. Maybe even turn it into a trade. Like my grandpa,” he said slowly, looking at her quickly to see how she’d react.
“That’s cool,” she enthused, honestly intrigued by this hobby of his. “So...what kind of things did your grandpa make?”
“All sorts of things,” he spoke more freely now that she hadn’t laughed at him for his honesty. “He had a workshop out the back of his and Gran’s place. Whenever my mom took us boys to visit, he’d always show me something new he was working on. Sometimes a miniature windmill or a garden ornament. Elah was off chasing the girls next door, but I prefered to be with Grandpa,” he watched the horizon wistfully, and Chesca watched a subtle range of emotions play across his face.
“What was he like?” she asked quietly.
“He was good. And wise,” Kaiden turned to her with a small lift of his lips, his eyes gleaming in the fading dusk. “He always had good answers to whatever was bothering me. My mom was the same. She took after her dad, Gran always said. The quiet and thoughtful ones. My mom loved metalwork even more than me, you know,” he met Chesca’s eyes with a broad smile.
“Really?” This really did surprise her. The trade was so...manly and gritty. Not feminine at all. But then, who was she to put labels on what was feminine or not? She was breaking all the stereotypes just by doing her job.
“Yeah, when she was a little girl, she’d spend hours by Grandpa’s side, watching him work. Back then, he used to make a decent living out of the stuff he made. She’d pick up the scrap pieces of metal in his shop and beg him to make strange little things that she imagined up.”
Chesca giggled at this, picturing a cute little girl working with her daddy in his shed. She had done the same, only her dad’s shed was his office, and the pieces of metal were boundary lines and pack agreements. She was pretty sure she’d learnt to read from one of his leadership books.
“He eventually taught her how to use the welder and circular saw herself, so when she was older she could make her own things between school and other interests,” Kaiden continued his story, happy at the fact that Chesca was such a good listener and was genuinely intrigued about his family history. “That arrow around your neck,” he motioned to it, and she lifted it from where it sat nestled in the folds of her shirt. The steel arrow pendant he had given her during their acceptance ceremony. “My mom made that. Gave it to me for my 15th birthday, telling me to stay--”
“Stay sharp and fly straight. Like an arrow,” she finished the phrase with him, having not forgotten what he’d told her. “It’s beautiful. Now I know how extra extra special it is,” she couldn’t tear her eyes from his, as a wide smile once again spread across his face. His smiles were something she found herself looking forward to, like a piece of sunshine had suddenly decided to light up her dark part of the even darker world, and wrap its arms around her heart and give it a playful squeeze.
“Like you,” his whisper was soft and she had to strain to hear it. He leaned closer, and in the pale mix of dusk and rising moonlight, his face danced with alluring mystery. He drew her like a magnet, and she lifted her face to his. It was only a whisper of a touch, but the feel of his soft lips on hers for a brief moment sent feelings through her body she had never imagined. He drew back slightly to look in her eyes, maybe to ask if this was what she really wanted. Her gentle nod was all he needed before his arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer. Paper plates and napkins were squished and forgotten between them, as the kiss they shared entirely took up all their focus. It was like a thousand mini sparklers lit up on Chesca’s lips, and his hand swirled flames across her back where it rested. The warmth that seeped from his body to hers was something she wanted to relax in forever. All the stress and doubts just seemed to ease away as his mouth pressed against hers in perfect harmony. Two hearts meant for each other finally coming as one.
But not quite. Before the fire consumed her entirely, Chesca pulled away and took a deep breath, placing her fingers over her burning lips. “That was…”
“Incredible,” he whispered when she couldn’t find the right word.
“Yes... but not how I pictured it.”
“And how did you picture our first kiss?” He leaned back and smiled lazily, obviously amused by her stunned reaction.
“Um, well, I ...didn’t really picture it. I maybe didn’t want to picture it?” she said rather sheepishly.
“Liar,” he teased, catching the uncertainty behind her words. “I’ve seen your eyes sometimes when you look at me, the way the shade of green deepens like the depths of the forest,” his voice had dropped to nearly a whisper as he leaned in closer and ran a finger down her cheek and along her jaw. Shivers spiralled across her skin, and she pulled away an inch despite her body wanting to lean in to his addicting touch.
“Maybe in the future,” she clasped her hands and cast her eyes to his quickly. “One day, I’ll be ready for this….this more physical relationship. When I … when I know you more…”
“And trust me more, I get it,” he chuckled slightly, his fingers tracing circles on her hand. “But now you can’t deny you want me. I know how you really feel, Chesca,” he teased, grinning and poking her in the ribs.
“Hey!” she slapped his hand away, embarrassed at the heat that rushed to her face.
“I know you want me,” he sing-songed and continued poking her.
“Kaiden, stop it!” she giggled and shoved his shoulder. He rolled over and grabbed her hand, pulling her with him. They both laughed and collapsed on their backs on the soft blanket.
Squeezing her hand, Kaiden hovered over her, “So how many pups do you want?”
“Excuse me?” She pushed on his chest and tried to sit up.
“Come on, you just admitted it’s gonna happen one day.”
“Yeah, I know… we’re mates and it’s..it’s inevitable,” She was glad it was dark and he couldn’t see the blush that remained glued to her entire face. “But-- we don’t have to think that far ahead.”
“But how many have you always imagined having?”
“Who said I even want kids?”
“Who doesn’t want kids?” It seemed the childish enthusiasm couldn’t be wiped from his mood. It was a strange one that she hadn’t seen on him much before. And it made her heart race to think of the future with him, and realise the fact that he wanted to have a family with her. He wanted her.
“I think it’s time we should head back,” she cleared her throat and picked up the first plate her shaky fingers touched.
He sighed gently, a sound that was almost a chuckle, but didn’t push it further. She caught the glance he gave her, but worked quickly to pack up the picnic.
“Did you enjoy this?” He asked softly while shaking out the blanket.
“I did, thank you,” she honestly answered. It was very sweet of him to do all this for her, and it touched her heart in an unusual way. Unusual, because she’d never had a man treat her like this before. Sure, there’d been boys during her teenage years who wanted to impress the Alpha’s daughter, but they were just kids. They didn’t care about anything seriously, especially her.
But with Kaiden, it felt completely different. It felt real. He was the man who was made for her, and was meant to love and care for her for forever. She just needed to work out if they were his true intentions before letting him anywhere near her heart or body.
As they walked back in a comfortable silence, his hand brushed hers. Her fingers instinctively wrapped around his before her mind could protest. She kept her eyes down on the path in front of them though, knowing he was looking down at her, feeling the sparks from her hand in his just as much as she. The silly smile that tugged at her lips accompanied the feeling of security as she walked by his side. It was the mate bond, she knew, but she had to admit that he’d been nothing but a gentleman the last few hours, as well as days and weeks. Maybe he was in this for the real commitment after all.
“I just have few things to finish up in my office,” she said quietly once they reached the side door of the pack residence. “Thank you again. I really enjoyed tonight.”
He gave her hand one last squeeze before heading off towards the kitchen with the picnic basket.
She tried processing all the new thoughts and feelings as she entered her favourite room of the castle, and knew it would take a while to sort the facts in her heart and mind. They were still opposing each other, as her mind protested and reasoned against trusting her mate so soon, while all her heart wanted to do was fall. Fall in love with the man it was meant to be with. But who was that man? That was the question foremost in her mind as she sat at her desk and started up her laptop.
Her hand brushed against the side and halted. It was warm. Her laptop had been off for hours while she’d been in the storeroom and then the picnic, but it was warm like it had just be on. A feeling of dread curled around her stomach, and her heart spiked with unease.
Flicking on the overhead light, her eyes darted over everything, not sure what she was looking for or what she wanted to find. A few papers ruffled and hastily restacked was not one of them, nor were the books lying on a chair or her drawer half open. The realisation that someone had been in her office, and gone through her stuff, made her suddenly feel sick and light headed, and she slid down the back of the door. From the floor, her blood pounded once more through her temples. Someone had come in here, while she had been out with Kaiden. Soemeone had gone through her important documents and computer, and perhaps stolen sensitive pack information. While she’d been out with Kaiden…
He’d distracted her. He’d played her so someone could get in and out unnoticed, most assuredly that no-good brother of his.
Her lips suddenly felt violated. Her heart suddenly clenched and her lungs found it hard to breathe.
Kaiden, her mate, was a manipulator like she’d always suspected.