The Admiral

James Morgan

Azizi hands me a bottle of rum and I join him and Ox in a round of drinks. My eyes occasionally drift to find Arden who never seems to look my way.

A few of the others spar and more bets are made, won, and lost. It’s only when the sun starts to rise does talk turns to the pirates, we encountered last.

“How many did we lose?” I ask.

“Five lost, and twelve injured,” Azizi rubs his eyes.

“Only five? That’s not too bad.”

“Our Master of Arms was one of them,” Ox eyes me before looking at Captain Debang, “It’s a good opportunity to ask to be assigned to The Morning Star.”

“You’re a good shot Morgan, I am surprised you were put to rot on The Orion,” Ox adds.

I might know why. I look over at Arden who gets up and starts to make her way to the bow of the ship. If she’s in authority, then she’s probably the reason why I’ve never made it further up in ranks and onto this ship. She’s been keeping me away. I had to almost freeze to death to get anywhere near her.

“Captain Debang might offer you the post temporarily,” Azizi chimes in.

“Maybe,” I put my bottle down and follow after Arden. She’s at the bow of the ship, sitting on the railing, watching on as some of the crew throw food at Damon who’s still tied to the bowsprit.

The way her hair dances gently in the wind as she’s bathed in the pink light of the rising sun makes her almost look ethereal. There’s a pang in my chest, a longing for her that I will never seem to shake, no matter how much time passes.

She watches me approach, and I lean on the railing next to her. We look out at the rising sun in comfortable silence for a long time. I might not know a lot about Arden, her past, or who she is now, but there’s always been something about her presence that brings me a sense of peace.

I feel her watching me and look up to see her soft brown eyes locked onto mine, “How did you know it was me?”

“There’s only one woman on Earth who moves the way you do.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I spent a lot of time watching you at the Academy, Arden. I don’t think you fully understand just how smitten with you I was.”

“Was?”

“Am.” Arden blushes and looks away. For a long time, she doesn’t say anything. “I always wondered what happened to you,” I feel her looking at me, but I keep my eyes fixed on the horizon, “Did you ever think of me?”

My eyes move to meet hers on their own. I need to see her as she answers; her face will tell me more truths than her mouth ever will. To my surprise, she doesn’t lie.

“James, there’s not a day that went by that your eyes didn’t creep into my thoughts,” Arden looks down at her fidgeting fingers and shakes her head, “they’re exactly as I remember them.”

The way she looks away almost tells me she regrets telling me the truth. I quickly take her hand into mine and hold it firmly.

“You shouldn’t do that,” her voice is weak, and her protest is halfhearted.

I walk over to stand between Arden’s open legs. She looks up at me, biting her lip as her eyes dart down to mine, sending my stomach into knots. I move loose stands of her wild hair off her face, and I can’t help but trace her bottom lip with my thumb. These lips, these lips were on mine moments ago, even though she had beaten me.

“You most definitely shouldn’t do that,” she whispers.

Arden’s words say one thing when her body sends a completely different message. I rest my forehead on hers. This is as far as I will go. I won’t kiss her the way Giddeon did below deck. If there’s something Arden is dealing with, something dark, then I cannot force her into this.

Come to me, Arden.

Choose me.

Arden closes her eyes and tilts her head a little higher. The anticipation is killing me. As her lips almost touch mine, she hesitates and doesn’t move.

I feel she wants me. Her hands cling to my shirt, pulling me closer while she fights whatever battle is going on in her head.

When I open my eyes to look at her, I see the tear that rolls down her cheek. Her eyes are still closed, and her face looks strained. She’s fighting kissing me. I wrap my arms around her and pull her head to my chest, holding her close. Arden slips herself off the railing to stand, and we stay like that for a long time.

“I know you feel as if you’re broken, Arden. I won’t argue with you about that or try to convince you otherwise; you know yourself better than anyone. I will be here, by your side, if that is where you want me.” Arden looks up at me, and I see that vulnerable girl from all those years ago with the same tempest raging behind those beautiful eyes of hers.

For a moment she looks baffled by my words, “Is that where you want to be?”

I nod, “It’s all I ever wanted, from the first moment you kicked my ass.” Arden chuckles. She takes a deep breath and lets out a long exhale. Her body relaxes into mine as she leans into me. “I never thanked you, for saving my life.”

“Mm.”

“Thank you, Arden.”

“Just don’t do that again,” she mutters as she buries her face deeper into my chest.

“Arden!” We both look up to see Jack running towards us.

I let Arden go as she goes to talk with the young boy. They talk discreetly for a few minutes before Arden puts her hand on Jack's shoulder and he nods.

Jack turns on his heels and starts running away.

Arden’s posture visibly changes, and when she turns around her face is a mask of cold authority. She looks over at the crew who still loiter about throwing scraps at poor Damon and her exterior hardens even more.

“Cut him loose,” Arden orders.

One of the women skillfully scales along the bowsprit cuts the ropes that bind him and Damon falls crashing into the sea below.

Arden looks over the railing at Damon who swims towards the rope ladder, “One more time Damon and I’ll hang you from the yard arm.”

Damon nods. Clearly, this isn’t his first time falling asleep on duty, and the punishment always escalates.

Arden shoots me a discreet wink before leaving.

If she has the authority to hang poor Damon, there’s no doubt in my mind, Arden is a Commodore.