The Admiral

Arden Lexington

As much as I wanted to go on the scouting mission my hair makes it near impossible for me to be discreet. That and as Admiral, I’m not supposed to put myself into situations that are obviously risky.

We’ve anchored the ship off the island of Boa Vista, the island closest to the island of Sal. I watch as Ox leads the crew to lower a long boat into the water. Hopefully, he and the handful of men that go with him can find a vessel capable of sailing the short distance north. As much as I want to be the one to put Wyatt down, I’ve decided to give all my men permission to take him down at the slightest opportunity. It seems James is rubbing off on me and I’m able to let go of some of my hatred for him. Some.

I watch James talking with Adam as they watch the crew row away toward land. The way Adam hangs off every word James has to say is a sign of just how much Adam respects him. It could be gratitude for James saving his life on that longboat they were stuck in amongst the ice, but it’s more than just that. Everyone seems to instantly like him, except Giddeon, it took him a while to warm up to him, but everything seems to be sailing along smoothly which I’m grateful for. The last thing I need is drama anywhere near my ship.

The longer I watch James, the more I start to imagine what our children might look like. I don’t know if I’m even able to bear any, and the idea is horrifying, to say the least, but there’s a small, tiny voice calling out to me from the empty places of my mind that craves love, warmth, and family. It’s a voice I’ve never paid much attention to, but recently it seems to be getting louder and competing with the other parts of my personality. Or maybe this is the definition of insanity and they’ve made a lunatic head of a private militia. I laugh out loud at that one. If I was insane, I could use all the manpower at my disposal to bomb the whole island of Sal with Wyatt on it. There would be countless casualties, mostly civilians, but the job would get done.

I sigh to myself and start thinking about all the ways I could torture Wyatt. I know him well enough to know he has a fear of octopus. That’s the first thing I’d do; restrain him, find live octopuses, and place them all over his naked body. He seems to have a liking for fire, he set my Orion on fire, maybe I can tie him to my mast and burn him alive.

“Wow,” James breaks my line of thought, “what are you thinking about in there, you look positively furious.”

“Ways of torturing and killing Wyatt,” I say flatly.

“Makes sense,” James comes the stand next to me and wraps his hand around my waist. “Knowing you it’s something sick and twisted.”

I scoff, “You should hear some of the shit Giddeon comes up with. He might look like a clean and polished man, but that mind is even darker than mine.”

“That’s a frightening thought.”

“As long as he’s on my side it doesn’t bother me.”

“What’s his story anyway?”

“He was an orphan, lived on the streets mainly pickpocketing until he picked the wrong pocket and was caught red-handed by Phillip Morris himself.”

“Seems like the previous Admiral had a habit of taking in lost children.”

“He had children of his own, I think he genuinely wanted to save us from ourselves. Giddeon and Debang both grew up on this ship.”

“Where is Phillip Morris now?”

“Happily retired and growing old in comfort.” James nods, and we stand there in a comfortable silence just watching the scenery.

It only took a day for Ox and the men to return. Having secured a seaworthy ship, I sat down with the Officers over dinner to discuss who will go to Sal.

I refill everyone’s glasses with rum before topping up my own, “I don’t want all my best people off the ship for what should be a simple scouting mission.”

“I agree but I also don’t think we can underestimate the situation, there’s nothing simple about what Wyatt is doing,” Giddeon says, “I’ll go with Collins, Finneus, and Elwin.”

“Morgan should go,” Thomas adds, and I feel my stomach knot. As much as the idea of him going scares me I can’t coddle him or give him special treatment because I love him.

I hide my displeasure, “Fine, but at least disguise yourselves, it’s a predominantly black island you’ll stand out, that and Wyatt knows what you both look like.”

I feel James watching me, but I don’t look his way. The last thing I need is for everyone to see my mask slip the moment our eyes meet. It’s at this moment I realize just what a big weakness James is for me. If anything happens to him on that island, I’m going to burn every bit of it to the ground, no matter the casualties, because if the world allows a human being as good as him to perish at the hands of worthless murderous scum like pirates, then the world and everyone else on it can burn.

That night I went straight to my cabin and stayed there. I had been going to James’s cabin every night since he was posted on my ship but right now, the idea of seeing him pains me. I’ve let him in, lowered my guard, and made myself susceptible to the pains of losing him.

I sit at my dresser and picked up my comb. I try to focus on attempting to brush out my hair, but instead, the comb gets stuck in my hair, and I’m so forlorn that I just leave it as I stare at myself in the mirror.

There’s a knock on my door and I assume it’s James, “I do not wish to be disturbed for the remainder of the evening.”

Thomas opens the door and comes in, closing the door behind him. He sees the comb in my hair and smirks as he approaches. I watch him as he starts to untangle the comb and hands it to me.

He sighs and looks away, “Do you want me to order James to stay on the ship?” he asks quietly.

I watch him in the mirror and take a moment to think, “I love him, Thomas.”

Thomas looks at me, “I know Arden, that’s why I’m asking. If you want me to send someone else with Giddeon, I will do it.”

“What would you do if you were in my shoes?”

Thomas knits his brows, “I wouldn’t make that choice, I would ask Morgan.”

“I’m responsible, no matter what he chooses.”

“True,” he shrugs, “but so is he. I would hate to lose such a competent Master of Arms after just acquiring him.”

Even though Thomas had a fair point I can’t change my mind after agreeing in front of everyone for him to go. James is a grown man and in service to The Fleet before all else.

“Send him with Giddeon.”