The Admiral

Arden Lexington

The carriage ride to dinner was more difficult than I had expected it to be. James is looking so handsome; I was lost for words when he opened the door. Now, trapped with him in such a small space, the tension is palpable. I’ve never been this nervous before and I hate it. But it’s not just James, it’s the idea of going into a house filled with nothing but memories of the parents I lost.

James takes my hand and holds it tight. He doesn’t say anything, but that little gesture is enough to ground my thoughts.

The way he looks at me sends tingles dancing across my skin. I go to kiss him, and it starts off innocently enough but the moment his tongue touches mine I’m set on fire and my hands work to pull him closer. I feel the same desperation in him, and as I straddle him James’s hands work their way up under my dress to pull me closer. His greedy hands grip my ass and I feel his hard member caress my core through our clothing.

“Arden darling, if we don’t stop now, I’m going to be a walking mess when we arrive,” his deep and raw voice does nothing to quell the lust I feel for him right now.

“You’re right. Of course, you’re right.”

For a long time, we just sit there holding each other as the carriage sways side to side. James smiles as his eyes gaze deeper into my soul by the second.

We finally arrived at the house and it’s only then that James releases his grip on me.

I get out first and see my grandmother waiting for us.

The estate is exactly as I remember it, a typical British plantation house with a wraparound porch.

When the Fleet found me and took legal custody of me, they took all the property that belonged to my parents and held it on my behalf until I became of age. The moment it became mine I allowed my grandmother to continue living here undisturbed for as long as she wanted.

The natural charm James oozes allows me to look around freely as he engrosses my grandmother in conversation. I feel my grandmother’s eyes on me as I walk through the house touching things that I forgot existed. She talks incessantly at me, but I barely hear a word, especially when I see the portrait of my parents and me as a little girl on the wall of the sitting room.

I had almost forgotten what they looked like without blood spattered on their fear-stricken faces.

James keeps my grandmother occupied by asking her question after question as I look around.

The saber on the wall draws my attention; it was my father’s sword from his time in service. I take it off the wall and examine the blade.

“Arden, put that away please,” my grandmother’s voice finally pierces my mind.

“I’m keeping this one.”

“Absolutely not.”

I look over at her somewhat amused at her tone and sheath the sword, “I’m keeping this,” I repeat.

Dinner crawls by so slowly. I distract myself by staring at James as he continues to charm my grandmother.

It’s only when dinner is over do I realize I don’t recognize any of the staff. They’re all young. As the young black girl goes to refill my glass, I take her hand. She freezes, and the fear in her is palpable.

I make sure to keep my voice down, “Are you a free woman?” The girl shakes her head, “Are you Bajan?” She shakes her head again, “Are you treated well?”

“As well as one may hope,” she says quietly. I let go of her hand and let her continue her work.

When I inherited the place, I hired a lawyer here on the island to make sure all staff here were free and paid a decent wage.

I stare at my grandmother. She’s been living a life of privilege here with no strings, and turned me, without my even knowing, into a slave owner. I think I’m going to be sick. “How many people work this house and land?”

James and my grandmother both turn to look at me, “Seven, why?”

“How many of them are slaves?”

“All of them, of course.” The way she’s able to say those words so casually fills me with a raging hot fury I can’t contain.

James stands up, “It’s been a pleasure speaking with you Casandra, it’s been an enlightening evening, but it’s getting late, and we have an early start tomorrow.”

James has me in the carriage quicker than I thought possible. He climbs inside after me and hands me my father’s saber. I was so angry I had almost forgotten about it.

As the carriage begins to move my hands grip around the saber and I take a deep breath, “Seven.”

“This is the norm here, right?”

“That’s my house, James, I own that house. There aren’t supposed to be any slaves working at that house.”

James puts his arm around me, “I understand,” I look up at James and he gently kisses my lips before smiling, “I thought you were going to cut her head off for a moment there.”

I laugh, “The thought did cross my mind. I do have diplomatic immunity here; I could go back and do it.”

“You’re joking?”

“About the diplomatic immunity?”

“No, about decapitating your grandmother.”

“I mean...” I shrug, “I could, I hardly know the woman.”

James smiles and kisses me again, “You’re trouble.”

“And you seem to know exactly when I need you. Thank you, James, for getting me out of there.”

“We should have never come in the first place.”

I shake my head, “No... No, I needed this. I got to see my parents-” I choke up on the words. I’ve never been able to speak about my parents much, “I got to see what my parents really looked like, and not how I remembered them in their last moments.”

James holds me tighter and rests his head on mine. I feel so safe with James near that it rattles me. It’s such a new sensation, and for the first time, I think about sharing my past with someone. Tomorrow evening the Commodores will meet for a debriefing with James about the Orion. I could spare him from rejecting me by giving him a glimpse of the ugliness within me and providing him with an easy way out.

We could go our separate ways and avoid an emotional mess. I would hurt that little more, but what’s another lash on an already whipped soul?