Chapter 20
Kedan walked out onto the lawn after lunch. He had been training with Griffa for a while now, but he didn’t feel like he was making much progress. He still couldn’t see spells or curses. He couldn’t feel any magic inside himself. He had mentioned yesterday to Griffa that perhaps they should give up. She was very adamant that they proceed. Kedan relented and said he would keep trying. Spending a couple of hours with Griffa wasn’t a bother.
It had been a rainy morning, but the rain had stopped just before lunch. The clouds were starting to part, letting little streams of sunshine through. As Kedan stepped out onto the lawn he scanned the area for Griffa. He spotted her at the very edge of the lawn, staring out over the open fields. The wind was blowing her hair back. A small ray of sunshine had broken through, illuminating her wild red curls.
Kedan stopped to watch her for a moment. He sometimes wasn’t sure what to make of Griffa. She was a mixture of moods. She could be silly and fun, seemingly carefree at times. She could be commanding and intimidating in other situations. She could also be caring and gentle when the situation called for it. Kedan thought he was probably a little in awe of her.
As Kedan watched her look over the fields, he wondered if this is what it was like to be in the presence of one of the great kings or queens of old. He had read stories of the true history of Regventus since he had been in Abscon. All the early kings and queens where written as awe-inspiring sovereigns who forged a new kingdom. Kedan could think of no better word to describe Griffa than awe-inspiring.
He wasn’t sure why. She was a beautiful woman, but he had been in the presence of women who had more allure. She wasn’t tall or large. She wasn’t perfect. She sometimes had a temper. She was a little impulsive at times. She was prone to melancholy, but Kedan thought that probably had to do with her stay in Aurumist. Even with all of this, there was something about Griffa that made Kedan want to pledge his loyalty to her. He wanted a better way for the people of the kingdom, but he might have been ready to just fight for the fact of Griffa reigning.
Kedan slowly walked towards Griffa. As he approached her, he realized until Griffa had befriended him, he had never had any kind of relationship with someone who didn’t want something from him. His parents used him to gain power. Golnar used him to subdue the folk. Teryn, his wife, used him to gain her position in the kingdom. Even Ansel and Talon only took Kedan in because he knew how to get them into the palace.
Griffa never asked anything of him, not really. She would ask him to help her from time to time, but she always gave him the option to not do something. Instead of asking something of him, she offered a service to him. She wanted him to be able to protect himself. She wanted him to not feel vulnerable in this world of magic. He had nothing to offer her in return, but his meager service. He said he would serve on her Ring, but that had been by his own choice. After all Griffa had done for him, he would have gladly done much more for her.
As he approached her side, she turned and smiled at him. “I’m sorry. I got lost in my own thoughts. Ever since I was released from the palace, I treasure these moments outside. I will never take them for granted again.”
Kedan looked at Griffa. She had never really talked about her time in Aurumist with him. “Was it awful, Griffa?”
“It was,” she said sadly. “It was the worst time of my life.”
“I have an idea of what you went through. I know the men who held you. Golnar does not put much value in people’s lives.”
“No, he does not,” said Griffa. “I am worried about this potion he has been spreading around the city. I am worried it could have repercussions for those who took it.”
“Like my wife,” said Kedan softly. “Teryn took that potion. I think he made some with her blood.”
Griffa took Kedan’s hand and held it. “I am sorry I said anything. I don’t really know what will happen. Do you miss her?”
“Teryn?” asked Kedan. “I’m not sure. Sometimes I think I might. I have known her over half my life, but she tricked me. She enthralled me. I cannot trust her ever again.”
“Do you still love her?” asked Griffa squeezing Kedan’s hand.
“I don’t know. If I do, it does not matter. There is no trust between us. I could not love her as I once thought I did. I value her as the mother of my child. I would like to meet my son.”
’You will,” said Griffa with conviction. “I will find a way to reunite you with your son. Teryn as well if you decide that is what you want.”
Kedan smiled at Griffa. “I believe you. I don’t think there is anything you couldn’t do.” He meant what he said. He thought Griffa might be capable of anything.
“Let’s get started with your training. I know you are feeling discouraged, but I don’t want you to give up. This will take time.”
Kedan nodded.
“Now, I want you to just stand here and look out over the field. I want you to try to empty your head of your worries and fears. Just focus on the kingdom around you. It is spring. There is so much new life all around us. After the rain, the grass of the field looks green and new. Feel the cool breeze. Watch the new buds on the trees as they sway in that breeze. All of this around you was created by the gods for all of us. It was made for you, Kedan. All of it has a touch of magic in it. It was left there by the gods.”
Kedan looked around. He never gave much thought to the outdoors. He had spent most of his life in the city of Aurumist. Out here in Abscon, everything was different. He was surrounded by open fields and orchards of trees. The houses and shops were not jammed together in rings. They were spread out with lawns and groups of trees between them. There were small farms in the village. Kedan was reminded of the beauty of the river house he stayed in with Teryn.
“Griffa, when you take the throne, you will have to live in Aurumist. How will you handle it?”
“The palace is my true home. I will feel as though I belong. I will miss Abscon and the forest, but I imagine I will travel as much as I can. What about you? You agreed to serve on my Ring. Will you be able to go back to the city?”
“Yes, if you are queen, I believe I will like the city very much.”
“Good,” said Griffa. “Now, back to our training. I want you to close your eyes.”
Kedan closed his eyes. The wind was picking up. He could feel it blow through his hair, lifting his curls off his neck. He felt Griffa put her hand on his chest. She was very close to him.
“Kedan,” Griffa whispered in his ear. “Don’t think, don’t worry, just be. Stand here and just be.”
Kedan took a breath. He tried to clear his mind of all his worries. He focused only on his own heartbeat and the feeling of Griffa’s hand on his chest. Where she touched him was warm. He could feel something in his chest. It was like a second heartbeat. Its beat was a little faster than his own. It seemed to be running through him searching for something.
Kedan took another deep breath. He felt another spark of life inside him. This beat was in tune with his own heartbeat, but was different. It rose within him. He felt it come to the surface of his skin. He felt it run up and down his arms. He could almost hear it. It was like a faint melody.
Kedan took another breath and opened his eyes. Griffa’s hand was still on his chest, and her face was very close to his. She was staring at him with her large dark blue eyes. He felt pulled to her. He felt connected to her.
“You feel it, don’t you,” she said smiling. “You feel the magic within you.”
“Yes, my queen,” whispered Kedan staring at Griffa. “I feel it. It is running through my body.”
“You may never be able to use it, but it is there. Remember the feeling, and remember how you found it. It will help you recognize magic when you see it. Now, let’s see if you can use it to recognize spells.”
Griffa took her hand off his chest and took his hand. She led him to the center of the lawn, and walked away from him about ten feet.
“I won’t hit you with any spells. I will send them close to you. See if you can see them.”
Kedan nodded and Griffa put her hands up. She pushed one out. Kedan looked but couldn’t see anything. He shook his head. Griffa pushed her hand out again. Kedan looked closely, but still couldn’t see anything.
“Close your eyes for second, Kedan. Remember what it felt like to recognize your own magic. Focus on that for a second,” said Griffa putting her hands down.
Kedan closed his eyes. He tried to remember what his magic had felt like. He tried to feel it on his skin. He looked for the tiny second heartbeat within him. He stood there with his eyes closed for what felt like several minutes. Suddenly he felt it. It was small and quiet, but inside him was a second heartbeat in tune with his own. Kedan opened his eyes and nodded.
Griffa pushed her hand out. Kedan looked, and he saw a slight golden disturbance fly by him. He looked up at Griffa with wide eyes, and nodded. She smiled and pushed her hand out again. Kedan looked to his other side and again saw the golden disturbance. He looked up at Griffa with a large smile.
She ran to him and hugged him. “I knew you could do it.” She released him. “Now, we are just beginning. Let’s spend the rest of today helping you recognizing spells. Tomorrow we will see how you are at dodging them. When you are skilled at that, I have a present for you.”
Kedan raised his eyebrows at this statement. “What is it?”
“You will see when the time is right. Now, let’s get to work.”
They spent the next two hours together. Griffa sent different spells close to Kedan, and he would tell her if he could see them. By the end of the two hours Ansel had come out to watch. Kedan had gotten to the point where he could see almost every spell Griffa threw at him. After Griffa threw four different spells at him, Ansel walked over to her.
“Griffa, I think that is enough for today. You are getting tired. It will be dinner soon,” said Ansel.
“Yes, I think that is enough for today. Do you agree, Kedan?” asked Griffa as she walked towards to him, Ansel following her.
“I do. I didn’t realize how long we had been out here. I didn’t mean to fatigue you in any way.”
“It’s no bother. I have enjoyed our afternoon,” said Griffa. She hooked her arm around Kedan’s. “I am actually hungry for the first time in a while.”
They continue to train almost every day for the next week. Kedan had gotten very good at recognizing spells. After a time, he got better at dodging them as well. Talon had joined them the last two days to shoot spells at Kedan. One hit Kedan, and he fell hard on the ground.
“Talon,” said Kedan sitting up. “You don’t have to be so rough. Griffa never hits me with anything like that.”
“You will be better at dodging spells if they hurt. It’s called incentive,” replied Talon with a grin.
Griffa hit Talon lightly on the arm. “Play nice, Talon. We don’t need Kedan injured.”
“As you command, my queen,” said Talon. “Are you ready to go again, Kedan?”
Kedan jumped up and nodded. By the end of the lesson he had managed to dodge every spell Talon could throw at him.
Griffa clapped and smiled. “Very impressive. You have come a long way. We have two days before our next Ring meeting. I have a meeting the day after tomorrow, so we will have one more full day to practice this week. I have something to give you tomorrow, Kedan. It will take more training for you to use it, but it will be worth it.”
“Are you really not going to tell me what it is?” asked Kedan as he walked to stand next to Griffa.
“No, don’t you like surprises?” asked Griffa.
“Not really, but if it pleases you for me to wait, I will do so.”
Griffa grinned at him and twirled away. “Come on you two. It will be dinner soon. You will both have to keep me company tonight as Ansel is out visiting the Valley.”
“Is that a command, my queen?” asked Talon taking Griffa’s arm and putting it on his own.
“Yes, it is a command, and you will follow it. We need to have some fun after a hard few weeks of work.”
“I couldn’t agree more,” said Talon smiling down at Griffa. Kedan followed behind them into the house.
After dinner, the three of them sat in the parlor together. Talon and Kedan sat on the sofa, Griffa sat in a chair nearby.
“Where are Max and Issa?” asked Talon.
“They have gone to the conservatory to do some research. Funny thing though, I didn’t see any book in their hands,” said Griffa slyly.
Talon smiled as he poured three glasses of wine. He gave one each to Kedan and Griffa. He lifted up his own. “I think that calls for a toast to young love.”
“I agree,” said Griffa raising her glass.
“I hope they are luckier in their love than I was in mine,” said Kedan raising his glass and then draining it.
“No, none of that tonight,” said Talon refilling Kedan’s glass. “There will be no talk of your enchantress wife. That is a rule for the night.”
“You aren’t the queen. How can you make rules?” asked Kedan looking at Talon.
“I serve at the queen’s command and every knows Griffa has put me in charge of fun and drinking.”
“I can think of no one more fit to serve,” said Griffa after taking a drink. “If you are in charge tonight, what do you suggest we do?”
“A game,” said Talon. “We will play a game called confessions. We will take turns confessing things to one another. They have to be true. While one confesses, the other two must keep a straight face. If you don’t keep a straight face you have to drink. You can’t react at all.”
“You just made that up,” said Kedan looking at Talon.
Talon shrugged. “Griffa, come sit with us here on the sofa. It will be easier if you are closer.”
“Fine,” said Griffa. She got up and plopped down between Talon and Kedan. “It’s your game so you go first, Talon.”
“Excellent,” said Talon. “Let’s see, I didn’t have my first kiss until I was 18.”
“You’re lying,” said Griffa rolling her eyes. “You said these confession had to be the truth.”
“I agree with Griffa. There is no way that’s true,” said Kedan, leaning over Griffa to look at Talon.
“It is true. I swear on my life. Now both of you have to drink since you reacted.”
“How is that possible?” asked Griffa after taking a drink. “I know you very well, Talon.”
“I had a late start, but don’t worry I made up for lost time,” replied Talon flashing her a smile.
“I have no doubt about it,” said Griffa rolling her eyes again. “So, it’s my turn now. Hmmm, oh I know!” She turned slightly to look at Talon. “Every so often I still have a dream about one of our times together. They are very vivid.”
Talon raised his eyebrows and smiled. Kedan snorted.
“Both of you drink,” said Griffa proudly.
“Is there a specific time you dream about, or is a different time each dream?” asked Talon after taking a long drink.
“That’s now how your game works,” said Griffa. “It’s Kedan’s turn.”
“When I was twelve years old, I almost burned down half the palace. I wanted tea one night and didn’t know who to ask. I went down to the kitchens and tried to start a fire on the stove. It did not go well. The whole kitchen had to be rebuilt. I had only been in the palace for a week.”
Talon said nothing, but Griffa smiled at Kedan slightly. She took a drink and said, “I would say it’s pity you didn’t burn down the whole building, but it does belong to my family so I’m glad it was saved.”
“My turn again,” said Talon as he refiled Griffa’s glass. He smiled wickedly at her. “I think either you or Ansel need to check on your sound charms at night. I’m usually the last to go to bed and when I come up the stairs, I can hear… disturbances.”
Griffa’s mouth popped open, and then she looked at Talon with narrowed eyes. She took a drink and then looked at Kedan. He knew he had a small smile on his face. He took a sip of his wine.
“It’s a shame we never needed sound charms in our times together, Talon,” sighed Griffa.
“Yes, because we were usually in an empty house together,” said Talon with a laugh.
“If that makes you feel better, go ahead and believe it. Now it’s my turn. Ansel told me when I was in Aurumist, he was afraid I would come back indifferent to him. He thought of who would make me a good consort. He thought of you, Talon. I think I would rather have Kedan if he wasn’t already married.”
Kedan looked at Talon with a smug smile. He drank from his glass.
“That’s a lie, Griffa,” said Talon adamantly. “You are just trying to punish me for my confession.”
“Once again, believe that if it makes you feel better,” said Griffa leaning slightly on Talon as he took a swig of his drink.
“Go on, Kedan. It’s your turn,” said Talon after nudging Griffa slightly. She turned and looked at Kedan.
“I’ve only been with one woman my whole life,” said Kedan. “I’ve only really kissed one woman.”
Talon laughed slightly. “You are serious?”
“I think that’s rather sweet,” said Griffa smiling kindly at Kedan.
Kedan shrugged. “I met Teryn when I was twelve. We had our first kiss at fifteen. We made love for the first time on my eighteenth birthday. I have known no other woman.”
Griffa and Talon both drank.
“We will have to see about changing that number for you, Kedan,” said Talon.
“I’m not really interested, at least not right now. I’ve had enough of that sort of thing.”
“You’re still married. I think you still love your wife,” said Griffa softly.
“After what she did to him?” asked Talon incredulously. “Come on, we aren’t supposed to be talking about this. It’s a rule. Let’s move on.”
The played a couple more rounds. At that point, Griffa was leaning on Kedan smiling up at him lazily. Talon had pulled Griffa’s feet up in his lap, and had removed her slippers. He looked like he might nod off at any time. Kedan felt more alert than he expected. “It’s your turn, Griffa,” said Talon with a yawn.
Griffa looked up at Kedan. “I think you are one of it not the most handsome man I have ever met, Kedan. I love Ansel and no one could come before him, but you are rather lovely.”
Kedan smiled at her and took a sip of wine.
“Really, Griffa, I’m right here. You are really going to say that in front of me?” asked Talon sitting up slightly and looking at Griffa.
“You think enough of your own looks without me telling you how handsome you are. You are very good-looking Talon, but I think Kedan has you beat.”
“Fine,” said Talon leaning his head back. “Your next, Kedan.”
“I think we need to go to bed,” said Kedan putting his glass down.
“No,” said Griffa softly. She yawned and sat up slightly. “I don’t want to be alone. I wonder where Ansel has gotten too. I thought he would be back by now.”
“Why don’t you want to be alone, Griffa?” asked Talon. He leaned up to look at her.
“Ever since my stay in the palace, I can’t stand to be alone for too long. I start remembering things. I also can’t stand the dark anymore.”
“Then we will all stay down here together, until Ansel returns,” said Kedan. “Would you like me to move so you can rest here on the sofa?”
“No,” said Griffa. She laid her head back on Kedan’s shoulder. “I’m comfortable as I am.” She closed her eyes. Talon laid back his head on the sofa.
Kedan looked down at Griffa. He shifted his arm so her head would lay on his chest. She snuggled into him a bit with her eyes closed, and soon her breathing was even. Kedan looked over at Talon. He had fallen asleep and slumped down where he was laying on Griffa. His arm wrapped around her waist.
Kedan looked back at Griffa and watched her sleep. She looked very young. Sometimes Kedan forgot how young she really was. She was only 23. She was too young to have gone through all she had. She had lost both her parents, and she had become the leader to her people. She had been tortured in the palace. Still with all of that, she still seemed to find joy in many things.
Kedan felt protective of her. He couldn’t imagine what horrors she faced in the palace. It made him angry to think of Golnar and Philo hurting her. He knew she had been poisoned and beaten. Even with all she had gone through in the palace, Griffa had still found a way to save Teryn and his son. Kedan tightened his arm around Griffa, and kissed the top of her head on impulse. She sighed slightly in her sleep.
He held her for a long while. She cried out a couple of times, but never fully woke up. Kedan tried not to move in case he disturbed her. He knew she had not slept well in a long while. Eventually, Ansel walked hurriedly into the room. Kedan wondered how he would react seeing Griffa asleep in his arms, and Talon spread on top of her fast asleep.
When Ansel spotted Griffa, Kedan, and Talon his shoulders seem to sag in relief. He came over and sat next to Kedan in a chair.
Kedan looked at Ansel with worried eyes. He quickly said, “She fell asleep like this. I didn’t want to disturb her. I know she hasn’t been sleeping well”
Ansel held up a hand. “I’m just relieved she isn’t alone. When I realized how late I would be, I was afraid she was all alone. She can’t stand to be by herself for long. I’m glad you and Talon kept her company. I got held up in the Valley. Two of my guards got into a tiff with one another, and one was injured. He will be fine, but I had to see to him and discipline the other.”
Talon adjusted his head on Griffa’s back and snored lightly.
“I see you’ve all been drinking again. I would say Talon is a bad influence on her, but I think it might be a mutual thing. I think in some ways, they are cut from the same cloth.”
“Talon could never be as good as Griffa,” said Kedan. “She has so much goodness that Talon could never have.”
“Don’t let his act fool you, Kedan. I haven’t always been very enthusiastic about Talon, and I hate to admit it, but he is a very good man. I owe him a lot. There are few people I trust with Griffa’s safety, but he is one of them.”
“I would like to earn that trust from you,” said Kedan softly.
“You might get there,” said Ansel with a half-smile. “I think I will get her up to bed. You and Talon should head up as well.”
Kedan nodded as Ansel got up. He walked over and slightly nudged Talon a couple of times. Talon looked up at Ansel with bleary eyes. He sat up slightly and stretched. “About time you showed up. You missed all the fun tonight.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed yourself. Do you mind moving so I can collect my queen?”
Talon looked down and smile fondly. He gently pushed up from Griffa and sat up. Kedan loosened his arm around Griffa as Ansel picked her up from the sofa. Kedan stood up, stretching his legs.
Griffa blinked and opened her eyes. She looked up at Ansel and touched his cheek. “I was wondering when you would come home. I’ve missed you.”
Ansel kissed her forehead and walked with her towards the stairs. Kedan and Talon followed.
“It looks like you were well entertained while I was gone,” said Ansel.
“Oh yes,” said Griffa sleepily. “Though I think you will need to work on your sound charms or let me do it from now on. Evidently we’ve been disturbing Talon.” Griffa closed her eyes and burrowed her head into Ansel’s chest.
Ansel stopped on the stairs and turned to look at Talon and Kedan. Kedan tried to keep a straight face. Talon waved his hand at Ansel. “Don’t even ask.”