Steeling Her: A Romance Novel

Nick

I can hear the guys grunt as they make impact with the padding held by the coaching staff. Coach starts to yell at us to be more energetic. I look at the people making their way to their seats in the stands. I can’t see my sister yet. She’ll be here, she always does for my games. My parents are usually here, but my dad is away on a business trip and my mom didn’t want to come without him.

I pull on my jersey and bite on to the collar. I see TJ running the lines as fast as he can. It gets him pumped for the game. If he doesn’t do his running, he won’t play well. Once he’s finished, he’ll make his way over to me. Then we’ll have a team talk in the locker room and make our way back out onto the field.

I’m throwing the ball to a staff member, warming up my arm. But I keep looking into the stands to see if I can find my sister, and also another girl. In the back of my mind, I have a feeling she won’t come tonight but I still want to know for sure. She’s never seen me play and I want her to. Haley said she might come to the party tonight. Here’s hoping.

TJ has done nothing but tease me the entire week about her. I felt bad for what I said to her. I want to apologize to her, but she couldn’t have ran away from me quick enough. Even when she was walking back to her dorm, she briefly looked back at TJ and me and then kept walking with her head down. That’s when I knew we affected her a little more than we originally thought. Then I saw her talking to Ryan and I immediately stared at them both. I know what he was trying to do but he told TJ she said no to a date.

I relaxed instantly when he told me that. He even knew because he was smirking so hard at me. So I started to wrestle with him about it, denying anything what he said about her.

“Jackson! Focus!” Bulldog shouts over the field at me, catching my attention. Bulldog is on our coaching staff, and he’s called “Bulldog” for a reason. He may be a short, stumpy man but you wouldn’t want to cross him because he will own you in two seconds flat. You do as your told with him, no questions asked. One of the best in college football too.

I catch the ball he throws back at me and side step pretending, I have people running at me. I throw it back and nail the spiral heading towards him. “Nice ball, Jackson!” he compliments me when he catches it with ease. We continue to do this for another ten or so minutes while we wait for the time to count down for kick off. I’m done with my warm up, and I see TJ jogging over to me with a beaming smile.

“Haley’s here, and so is Danielle.” He doesn’t mention her, so I look down and check the back of my studs. I look over my shoulder to see Haley sitting in the second row with Danielle, so we wave over to them. They wave back to us with grins on their faces.

“Cheer up, man! There are other girls here to watch you.” His head bobs back into the stands, and I see Maya sitting with her friends down the line from my sister. She starts waving at me while sucking on a lollipop. I send her a nod in acknowledgement. I face TJ, and he’s smirking at me again.

“Fuck off, TJ,” I grit out and we all walk inside with him laughing beside me. He always winds me up. Successfully too. He knows what buttons to push to piss me off.

Once we get to the locker room, I sit over to where my training bag is and wait for the rest to follow suit. We all have to listen to Coach’s speech. I hear my phone buzz in the bottom of my bag and I fish it out with my free hand while the other holds a bottle of Gatorade.

Maya: Good luck tonight babe! I’ll be cheering for you ’’’xx

I ignore it and put it back inside my bag with force. The game is my main focus for tonight. I have to pump myself up for tonight.

Focus on the game, Nick.

After Coach’s speech, we all run back out through the tunnel and we get a cheer from the crowd. I look around to see Haley and Danielle standing and clapping for us. I smile at them and place my helmet on my head and ready myself for what’s about to come.

Auburn. It’s Friday night and we’re playing against a solid team. We beat them last year but only by a three point lead. It was a tough game with tough players. I remember their cheerleaders mainly. I remember me and the guys staring at them while they did their routine for their team then watching ours.

“If they don’t get you pumped up, then I don’t know what will!” Rob jokingly nudges me and TJ. TJ just laughs at him as a reply while I just stare at them for a second, then move my eyes to the stand, and see the empty seats next to my sister. I’m not wishing my family was here, but her.

Feeling the slaps of the guys telling me it’s time to lead the team, we run out between our cheerleaders and I look straight ahead of me. I just can’t look at anyone. I need to stay in the zone.

Once the game starts, I forget about the people in the stand and focus on leading this team to our first victory of the season. We often play well at the beginning, but start to slip a little before halftime. I see a few heads drop, including Rob’s and Reggie’s.

I grab on to their helmets and make them look at me. I tell them, “Don’t you guys dare drop your heads! DO YOU HEAR ME?” I slap their helmets once more while they nod and bump helmets with each other. Keeping us in the game, Reggie gets a touchdown thirty seconds before the whistle blows. Calling it in, we’re seven points ahead with 14–7. It’s still a close game despite the lead.

Once the game was over, we had won by five points, 25–20, with TJ getting the final touchdown. We hugged each other, and I couldn’t be happier for my best friend. He was grinning from ear to ear. We shake the other players’ hands before I walk over to where Haley and Danielle are. I see them smiling at me.

“You played so good, Nick! And TJ, your touchdown was amazing!” I didn’t realize TJ followed me. I see him smiling up at the girls.

“Thanks Haley! I didn’t think I’d make it.” He exhales deeply, allowing his hair to fly up a little. I laugh at his facial expression because I didn’t think he’d make it either. He cleared the guy who was on his tail and leaped across the line.

“Carter said to tell you guys you both played amazing!” My eyes snap back over to my sister again after hearing her name. It hit a nerve in my body when I heard her say Carter.

“She was watching? Where?” TJ asks after a few moments. I couldn’t form a sentence. She was watching? I see Haley’s head nod up and down, looking at her phone. I see the message she wrote on the screen.

“She’s watching you both on TV. She’s doing an assignment at the moment, but she messaged our group to tell you that!”

I need to get into a group chat with her. I feel a smile grow on my face as I look at the two girls. Haley is smiling back, oblivious to my thoughts, but Danielle is smirking at me. I raise an eyebrow at her, and her smirk looks like something TJ is wearing right now. I roll my eyes at the both of them and we all chat a little longer until we get interrupted by a high-pitched voice that now irritates the hell out of me.

“Nick! Babe! You were amazing!” Maya squeals behind my sister, who sighs just from hearing her voice. She shuts her eyes, trying to block her out. I thank Maya, trying to get her to leave, but she doesn’t pick up on the hint. “Are you coming to the pool party at the house tonight?” I nod along with TJ.

“Perfect! You can stay with me later if you want? I’ll see you guys then! Bye, babe!” She waves off, eventually leaving us alone. TJ and I head into the locker room for showers while the girls wait for us so we can head to the party together.

I put my shirt over my head, ignoring TJ’s teasing. He’s been doing it since we walked into the showers. “Dude! You should’ve seen your face!” He pinches my cheek.

I swat his hand away. “Shut up, TJ! You’re such a drama queen!” I zip up my bag and stand at the door, waiting for him to join me.

We both walk back out to the open air out of the stadium and we see Haley and Danielle laughing at their screens. As soon as we approach them, Haley turns around and scowls at us. Both our eyes widen at her sudden change in mood.

“Woah! What’s that look for?” TJ asks with his hands up in surrender. We’re both scared at what is going to come flying out of her mouth. This is not going to be good.

“You!” She points at TJ. “Did you ask Carter if she was pregnant?” She pushes his chest, making him step back a little.

“Oh shit . . .” TJ curses under his breath at my sister.

“ ‘Oh shit ’ is right! What the hell is wrong with you, TJ! You basically called her fat! Never comment on a girls weight or ask if she’s pregnant!” She waves her hands up in the air in TJ’s face.

“I didn’t mean it like that. She ran into the restroom and told us she felt sick. It was the only thing I could think of . . .” He groans at hearing what must have gone through her head that day.

“And you!” She points to me. Oh shit. “You said she was ugly!” My eyes widen even more and I shake my head no.

“N-No! I didn’t call her ugly! Shit, is that what she thinks?” I spin my head to face TJ, who stares at me with disbelieving eyes.

Fuck. I fucked up. Badly. So did TJ.

“I think she took it the wrong way. I said that she’s not the type of girl to get pregnant. I meant it as a compliment, I swear! As in, she’s responsible to not get knocked up. I didn’t mean she’s ugly; she’s not!” I freeze at what I just said out loud. Double fuck. Don’t pick up on it, don’t pick up on it.

“Ughhh! You both need to rewire your brains! You’re both idiots, do you know that!” Haley points her fingers at both of us, with anger in her face.

“How about this? We’ll drop around tomorrow and apologize to her?” TJ steps closer to my sister, who drops her hands down to her sides. I nod my head, not wanting to say anything more about it just in case more word vomit comes up my throat and exits my mouth.

I watch Haley’s head nod too while her eyes dart between us as we all walk to TJ’s car. Slipping inside, I can’t get the thought of Carter thinking that I think she’s ugly.

She’s the furthest from ugly. She’s stunning. So stunning that she hasn’t left my mind since I first saw her. Her striking blue eyes when they fell on me. The way they roamed my body when she stood in front of me. Her timid demeanour. Her fragile body—her sexy, fragile body that I couldn’t keep my eyes off of.

Then, when she spoke. That soft angelic voice that, if you weren’t looking at her you would’ve missed completely. The way her lips moved when she spoke was what stole my attention instantly without even trying.

“Yo! Nick! You alright, man?” TJ punches me out of my thoughts. I nod back, slipping out of the car noticing the two girls had already walked inside.

“You good?” he asks me again when I meet him on the other side of the car.

“I’m good.” I pat his shoulder as we walk into the house. I look around the house to see if I can find her. Haley said she might come to the party. I hope she did. I want to talk to her before either one of us gets drunk and doesn’t remember what we said.

I roam my eyes around at each brunette, trying to see if she’s here. Catching a few eyes in the process, I get winks and smiles in my direction as I sip on the beer bottle TJ had gotten for me.

“She’s not here man.” He laughs before taking a sip of his own. Am I that obvious? “Haley said she’s still in the dorm room doing the assignment.” He smiles smugly over at me. He’s the only person who knows me like that back of their hand. But I’ll deny it.

“I’m looking for Maya . . .” I lie.

“Maya is blonde, Nick, not a brunette,” he teases me with that look still on his face. I roll my eyes and sit on the sofa with the rest of the players. A half hour later, I’m still on the sofa sipping on the same beer.

I can’t stop thinking about the whole Carter thing. I stand up and start to walk outside to the front but get stopped when I hear TJ.

“Where are you going?” he asks me from a distance sitting in the arm rest.

“I need some air. I’ll be back in five.” I don’t wait for a response. I walk outside and brush past people wandering through the space parted for me. I decide to leave.

***

Carter

I tap on my keyboard, trying to type some words into Google to help me understand what some of these big words mean. Some of the names given to body parts are absolutely outrageous. How in the world am I going to remember these?

YouTube.

That’s usually a good place for teaching things; tutorials and what not.

I type it in the search engine and click on it when it shows up. I type in anatomy courses and scroll through my options. Trying to find ones with good diagrams and pictures to help me learn the material usually works for me. Oooh, here’s one. I click on the name and wait for it to load.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

I look over to the door to see if it was ours that the person knocked on. I stare at it and then back to my laptop to see it’s only 10:44 PM in the top right corner of my Mac.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

I jump a little and laugh, thinking it’s probably Haley or Danielle. They must’ve forgotten their keys or something. I walk over to the door and my legs gets pulled back, trapped by the charger. I release it and carry on to the door and swing it open.

“What did you guys forg—Nick?” My eyes widen at the sight of him. What the hell is he doing here? I think to myself, just staring at him. Dark navy blue shirt clasps on to his muscles and black jeans hang nicely to his hips. Haley, he’s probably looking for Haley. “Um, Haley should be at the party?” I tell him quietly. I didn’t recognise my own voice one bit and cringe at the sound of it.

His eyes pierce through me, studying me, while both his hands rest on either side of the door. “Uh, I-I know . . . I actually came here to see you.” My heart starts to race at what he said. “Can I come in?” he asks, still staring at me. Those green eyes are so mesmerizing. I don’t know where to look.

I step to the side to allow him in and I awkwardly close the door. The smell of his cologne captures my nose, and I inhale slightly to keep the smell with me. He starts to walk over to the sofa and sits on it. I follow behind him and sit the other side. He scoots closer to me and I clear my throat, wondering why he’s here.

“Is everything okay?” I ask timidly afraid of the answer.

“Yeah . . . well, no . . . I just wanted to come over and apologize for the other day. Carter, I know what I said upset you. It wasn’t my intention. When I said you’re not that type of girl, I meant it as a compliment, but it came out as an insult from the context of the conversation. I get why you were offended.”

“Nick, its fine.” I rub the back of my neck awkwardly.

“It’s really not. You’re not ugly. I never thought you were, Carter. I didn’t mean to upset you. Haley told me tonight that it did and, since then, it’s been on my mind. So, I just thought I’d come over and explain my point of view after seeing it from yours . . .” I sit there in shock, just listening to him talk to me. He doesn’t think I’m ugly? His eyes never wavered from mine, only blinking. I can see he really is sorry.

“No, I probably overreacted. Honestly, it’s fine, Nick. You don’t need to apologize—”

“That’s the thing Carter, I do. I’m sorry I said that. I’m sorry I upset you. I really am.” I unknowingly take his hand in mine and I smile at him. I can see he’s beating himself up about it but it’s not news to me. I got over it and accepted it.

His hand squeezes mine as he looks down at them, intertwined. He laces his fingers with mine, and I feel my heart beating so fast. “Thank you. But honestly, it’s fine. It’s not the first time I’ve heard it,” I mumble that last part to myself as I stand up, letting go of him. I miss the warm touch of his skin on mine, but I need to stay away from him.

“What? What do you mean it’s not the first time? Someone has called you ugly before?” I hear the edge in his tone that makes him stand up alongside me, his build towering over mine. My eyes widen at the sight of him once more. His intimidating frame makes me step back a little. “Carter, has someone said that to you before?” I smile at him and fix my hair out of discomfort. I cough as I try to think of something to say but I come up blank. Why does he do this to me?

“Carter . . . you’re not ugly. Trust me on that. You’re the furthest thing from ugly; the complete opposite, in fact.” I feel the heat rise up in my cheeks at his words. His phone vibrates on the table, catching both of our attention. I see Maya written across the screen, wondering where he is. What’s the furthest thing from ugly? is what I want to ask him but it won’t come out.

“You should probably get back to the party . . . People are probably looking for you. I don’t want to keep you—” He takes my arm gently, and I spin to look up at him, wondering what he’s doing. We just stare at each other for what feels like forever, even though it’s only been a few minutes. My heart hammers away at my chest, feeling the energy from his touch.

“The party was boring. Can I stay here for a little while?” he asks me with a smile.

I return it. “Hiding from someone?” I manage to get out with a teasing tone. He laughs at this and I freeze at the sound of his laugh. I haven’t heard him laugh before and it’s so appealing. Seeing he has a single dimple on his left cheek, I stand there staring at him in wonder. He’s so good looking.

“Something like that, yeah. Do you mind?” I shake my head. “I won’t disturb you. You’re doing assignments, aren’t you?” I nod my head, still noticing his hand is holding my arm. I don’t think he has realised this yet. I don’t say anything because, to be honest, I don’t want him to let go.

“Yeah, well, I was trying to but it’s hard at the moment. I have to look up all these words and remember them. It’s boring, so I can play a movie for you if you want?” Hearing his phone buzz again and again, over and over, he shuts his eyes and lets go of my arm, reaching down to turn it off. I bite on my lip, feeling like a third wheel between him and his girlfriend.

“What class is it? Maybe I can help you? I might have taken it?” he asks, focusing his attention back to me. I stand there in shock. I won’t be able to concentrate with him helping me.

“Um, basic anatomy for physical therapists,” I tell him and he smiles back at me with a twinkle in his eye.

“You want to be a physical therapist?” he asks with a high pitch tone in his voice, almost like he doesn’t believe what he heard. I nod at him, putting my arm around my back and locking it into place with the other.

“I’m studying it too. I’ve actually done that class. I can give you my notes if you want? It’s hard but once you get the concepts you’ll be fine for the next few classes. Make sure you learn as much as you can. The exam is tough with a high failure rate. Do well in the assignments too. Get all the percentage you can going into the exam! Here, let me help you.” He takes my shoulders and backs me up, spinning me around and guiding me to the chair I was sitting in.

“I’m sure you have better things to be doing tonight than to help me, Nick . . .” I tell him over my shoulder as I sit down. He takes the seat next to me, looking at me with his boyish grin that would make any girl swoon, me included.

“It’s not like you’re keeping me here against my will. I want to help you.” He leans in closer to me and scrolls through the videos I looked up on YouTube. He opens another tab and types in another website for me. His arm brushes off my own every now and then.

“Wouldn’t your girlfriend mind that you’re not at the party?” I ask and he stops for a moment. His eyes scan mine, and I feel my breath catch in my throat.

He smiles at me and releases a breathy chuckle. “I don’t have a girlfriend, so there’s no need to worry about that Carter.” He continues typing on my laptop with a smile on his face.

He doesn’t have a girlfriend? Danielle was right.

But he has a choice of any girl on campus. I sigh mentally at that thought. Quit while you’re ahead, Carter. It’ll be painful if you don’t, I think to myself. We spent the next two hours talking about the course while I took down his advice as he’s three years ahead of me.

“You know what? Give me your phone.” I open up my phone and hand it to him. I lean over to see what he’s doing. I see him typing in a number and wonder who’s it is. Adding it to my contacts, he types in his name. I feel a pulse rip through my entire body. He’s giving me his number? He turns his phone back on and I can see the numerous messages and missed calls he’s got from people. Once it’s on, he presses call on my phone and I see my number come up on his. He clicks back in to his contact details and puts an arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his chest. Seeing he’s taking a selfie of us, I laugh and cover my face.

“Don’t do that. Come on, you look great!” He laughs, trying to take my hands away from my face but I squeal out a laugh.

“Oh God, I would break the screen with how I look right now.” I giggle into my hands.

He succeeds in taking my hands away from blocking my face and, with his arm once again finding my shoulder, tells me, “Carter, you couldn’t break the screen if you threw it at a wall.”

We laugh and take a picture. I see it as his contact on mine and he takes another one of us for his phone. Setting them both up on our phones, I smile at his name typed in. “If you need help with anything, college, parties . . . my sister, just call me. Or text me, I don’t mind. Or even if you just want to talk.” He smiles, leaning over my phone in my hands, his elbows resting on the table. I stare down at the picture he took of us. We’re both smiling like we won the lottery. He’s so photogenic. Meanwhile, I look like something from Ghostbusters.

“Okay, cool. Thanks.” I was surprised at how calm I sounded. Because inside, it was like a rampant zoo kicking up. I look up to see how close he is to me, and I see his smile slowly fade away as we once again look at each other. My breathing is silently erratic and uncontrollable as I realize his proximity, staring into those hunter-green eyes once more. You could get lost in them.

I study his features more closely. He’s got small freckles dotting his face, making him look more innocent. His nose is perfectly straight with no bumps or crevices visible to the eye. His lips are plump and pink, and his tongue trails out to lick them. I look back up to his eyes and see he’s looking at my lips.

Why is he looking there?

He starts to lean in slowly towards me, finding my eyes once more. His hand slips to the back of my chair, caging me in, all while his head tilts slightly to the side. Feeling his breath tingle my lips, I don’t pull away from him.

Hearing the keys fumbling in the door, we pull apart from each other quickly as soon as the door swings open.

Was he going to kiss me?

No. No, surely not.

“Ca—Nick? What the f-fuck? Where the holy hell have you been the entire n-night! TJ w-went home looking for you . . . Maya is pissed!” Haley starts laughing along with Danielle. They can barely stand. I release a small giggle at my two roommates laughing at what Haley said. They both trudge in and sit in the seats opposite to us. I lean back, pulling my legs up on the chair. Watching them both nearly miss the chairs completely as they sit down, I hear Nick laugh at the two of them.

“She’s such an annoying bitch! Ugh, she just wouldn’t leave me alone tonight. ‘Where’s Nick? Have you seen Nick? He told me he was coming!’ Blah blah blah . . .” Her voice tries to imitate the girl she really doesn’t like. You can tell by her face. Every time she’s mentioned, Haley rolls her eyes or huffs. It’s like she is allergic to her. Haley stands back up, gripping on to everything in her path to the refrigerator.

“Ahhh! Pizza!” She swoons at the sight of our leftovers from last night. We really need to start cooking for each other, I mentally note to myself. “Alright, I’m going to s-sleep. I’m tired and wasted. Gooodnight, peeps!” She gives us the peace out sign as she walks into her room, closing the door with pizza hanging freely from her mouth. Hearing Danielle snort brings our attention back to her. She’s sipping on a water bottle, eyeing both of us up.

I see the smirk crawl onto her lips as she looks at me. I feel my cheeks heat up. Don’t say anything. Please don’t say anything. Nick starts to look between the both of us skeptically.

“We didn’t interrupt something did we?” Danielle teases Nick, who stares at her for the longest time. The silence between the three of us is deafening. Someone answer.

“No, we were just talking.” He shrugs off her comment like it’s no big deal. He’s telling the truth. Nothing happened other than us talking. I smile over to her and send her a don’t-you-say-another-word look over to her but she purposely doesn’t pick up on it, because her smile gets wider.

“Mmmhmm. Talking? Riiight . . .” She stands up and throws the bottle into the trash. Pushing her chair in, she smiles at the both of us. I try to hide my embarrassment while Nick stares at her, confused as to what is going on. Catching Nick’s eyes again, I look away down to my laptop screen.

“I’m going to sleep too. ’Night, kids! Stay safe, and wear protection!” she yells behind her. I close my eyes, trying not to throw the chair at her. Oh. My. God. She did not just say that out loud. Nick twists his body around in the chair to watch her leave and then focuses his attention back to me. I feel his eyes burning through my skin. I refuse to look at him.

“Am I missing something?” He laughs slightly at the end.

I shake my head. “I honestly don’t know what she’s talking about. I-I think she’s wasted too.” I think on the spot to diffuse the awkward situation.

“Okaaay . . . Well, I better go anyway. TJ will be annoying the hell out of me if I’m not home.” He stands up beside me and I copy him. I fix my hair once more and stand there awkwardly. I mentally groan at myself. Why do I have to be like this?

He opens the door and I stand there, watching him walk out the few steps we had. Watching his back muscles move is so hypnotizing. He turns back around to face me, smiling down at me. I gulp down hard as I look up at this Greek god standing right in front of me. Speak, Carter, speak.

“Um, thanks for helping me out tonight. I owe you one.” His smile gets wider as the seconds pass between us.

“No problem! Anytime, I’m just a phone call away. You don’t owe me anything, Carter. I wanted to help.” He slips his hands into his front pockets, leaning slightly forward on his toes. While staring at each other, I remember that it’s my turn to speak.

“Oh yeah! Um, thanks. You’re probably going to regret giving me your number.” I laugh, holding up my phone in my hand. “I do owe you, though. You spent the entire night with me, I probably bored you to tears. I’ll buy you food or something to make it up?” I bite on my bottom lip, thinking why would he want to hang out with me? I’m so weird.

“I definitely won’t regret it. How about this? You come to my next game and we’ll call it even?” I hear the happiness in his tone and it catches me off guard a little. Why would he want me at his next game? “Because I would like to see you there.” My eyes widen at the fact I asked that out loud.

“I said that out loud didn’t I?” Seeing his head nod with amusement, I groan and face palm myself. His laugh occupies the space between us. “Um, sure okay?” I stare back at his tall frame.

“Really?” he asks raising his eyebrows at me. I nod, shuffling my bare feet around. “Cool! It’s in two weeks, on a Saturday though. It’s at home because the other team’s stadium is under renovation at the moment. So, I’ll see you there?” I nod once more and he once again sends me his beaming smile that knocks the wind out of me.

“I’ll see you there!” I tell him and he waves me off as he walks down the hallway and down the stairs.

He looks back at me one last time and says, “Goodnight Carter!” And he leaves.

I’m standing there, staring at the empty space he once occupied and I finally close the door snapping myself out of it. Feeling my heart beat so rapidly, I feel the adrenaline in my veins and I smile at the thought of him.

Did he try to kiss me? Or is there something on my face? I’ll go with the latter, it sounds more realistic.

I smile to the empty dorm and shut off my laptop bringing it inside my room. I climb into bed and click on the photo of us, just staring at him; the blond green-eyed guy with his arm around me. In both a protective and comforting manner.

I’m so close to him. I was so close, I felt his heat radiate from him. And his smile is to die for. He’s literally owning the all American dream guy. Those eyes will be burned into my mind. I’m not complaining, they’re so stunning.

Ugh! Why do I do this to myself?

I sigh to myself and my racing thoughts. I roll over onto my back and stare up at the ceiling.

Sleep, Carter, sleep.