Shouldn't Have Kissed You

Maya finished her last piece of cake before looking up at Chris. He was talking and the last thing she heard was him saying urinating on their marriage? She couldn't even remember. But can you blame her? It had been months.

Months since she eat home made food. And to be honest, she missed it. She was tempted more than ones when she would walk in and to the kitchen to find her food in the oven. Waiting for her to eat. But in order to prove to her dear husband that she could survive without him, she just gathered all her courage and walk away.

Of course it wasn't easy. So that's why she made sure before walking home, she and Leonel would go and grab a bite. If Leonel wasn't around, she would ask for pizza in her office because she hated to eat alone in a restaurant. That's how it worked for her. That's how she survived without eating food that Chris thought was hers.

And today. She was way too tired to go our with Leonel. In fact, it was late and she was tired. So when she got home and found her darling husband wanting to settle all their differences and the good smell of the food. Maya couldn't say no to him since her stomach wouldn't stop reminding her how starving it was.

Here she was, looking at her husband whose lips were just moving to her. She still heard nothing. Maya wanted more desert. It was way too sweet to be have prepared by her husband. The last one she tested it was sweet but not this sweet to have her cleaning her plate along with her spoon. It wasn't the desert only, the food was also good. It was good to an extent when Chris got up to carry the leftovers, she wanted to protest.

But she held herself back. She didn't want him calling her fat. It's not like he hadn't called her that before, but if he did that then, she won't have listened to him. It's not like she was that fat. Right? She only weight 60kg, was that fat?

Anyway, it was her body and she would do whatever she wanted to do with it. Maya wasn't about to starve herself to death just to be slim. She was no model and she cared less of what people said about her. It was her body at the end of the day. At least that's what she would tell herself every time someone looked at her in a way to suggest she is fat.

So Maya said what she never thought she would say in front of him. For status, she said way too many times to Leonel. He knew her very well and she loved him for not judging her. He also could eat despite him being a model. How did he not get fat? Let's say he knew how to eat and not getting fat thing. Do with Leonel around, everything was great. She was her. She was Maya, the real Maya.

She wasn't Maya Rollins. Neither was she Maya Freeman. She was Maya. The Maya who loved her freaking food very much. The Maya who laughed careless nor the Maya who was afraid to laugh since she would be called all sorts of names. That wasn't Maya. The one who was afraid to say anything before thing it through, that wasn't her. The real Maya would say whatever she wished to say and Leonel would be happy. Happy for her speaking her mind out.

"Can I get another desert?"

She watched Chris stop talking and look up at her. She knew he wanted to say something. Something that had to do with all that talk you heard nothing? But she kept her gaze into his eyes. They weren't brown which meant he wasn't mad at her. Maya knew she was safe for the time being.

"What?" Maya watched his reaction. It was a surprise written all over his face.

He was surprised she asked for more? Leonel would never be. In fact, he would ask the waiter to bring the rest out for her to ear. And if it's lunch hour, he would ask for takeaway, for her to eat at four. That's during her tea break.

"I mean if that's okay with you?" She didn't know why she said that but she needed that good testing desert in her mouth again.

Chris got up from his seat, "of course it's okay with me," he smiled at her and picked up her plate. "I'll be back in a jiffy."

Maya didn't know why he was smiling but she was happy that she was having that desert in her mouth again. So while waiting for hers, she got up and took his. He hadn't eaten anything despite it being his favorite.

Poor guy.

Maya thought as she took a bite. All he did was talk and she, she heard nothing all through his speech. Maybe it's because she didn't want a long apology. Maybe all she needed was a sincere apologies. Not a long speech about urinating on a river and family me members drinking from it.

But she had to admit that that was a good one. She couldn't help but smile at herself. How he thought of the proverb and used it to compare with his life was way too funny to laugh at. He was good and Maya had to give him that. How may had he used when she wasn't listening? She wished at that time she had paid attention to him. Maybe she would be having her own Churchill Show (it's a comedy show) Maybe her ribs would be hurting now. Yes, the would be hurting because she couldn't handle the heat of the moment. She took another bite into her mouth and that's when Chris decided to walk in on her. She just wanted to bites before he came back. And now that he found her holding his plate and the fork on the mouth, she had no excuse to give.

"I'm guessing that you must be craving for them," Chris said moving to the coffee table.

Wait, is that a smirk on his face?

She thought he would be shouting at her now and calling her all names in this world. But a smirk, that was the last thing she expected to see on his face.

"I'll get you another fork," she said walking past him.

Maya felt his hand on her arm stopping her from moving. He wasn't hurting her like he would do before. Instead, it was a harmless touch which sent shivers all over her body. It was foreign yet, she didn't want him to stop. When she looked at where their skin touched, she looked up to find him staring at her.

Is he staring at my lips? OMG!!!

As if reading her mind, Chris let go of her and took the fork that belonged to him from her hand.

He did that to snatch the fork from you, dummy head.

"No need for that," he said turning away from her, "I understand, there is nothing wrong with craving for something."

Maya walked back to her former seat, "Stop saying craving it's not like I'm pregnant. Craving is for pregnant women."

"It's not like I would mind if you are pregnant," Chris said under his breath, "but with my kid not another man's." Of course Maya heard that.

"Excuse me?"

"Ooh nothing," he said nowhere else but her, "I said you're right, craving is for pregnant women," he rubbed his hand behind his neck, "please dig in."

Maya just let him be. She took her red velvet cake and began to eat. Chris did the same with the same fork that she had used. Maya felt awkward watching him take the same fork in his mouth but she kept quiet. It was his call and not hers. This time, he waited till she was done before he could say anything. Which was a good thing since her attention was all in the desert.

Once done, Chris took the plates and placed them on the coffee table. Maya on the other hand, shifted awkward since she had nothing to do but listen to him this time.

"Can we talk now?" Chris asked once he saw she was settled.

Maya nodded her head. She didn't trust her voice at that time. And that's when it hit her. She had just spoke with Chris few minutes ago. That's why he was shocked and at the same time surprised. She hadn't talked to him in months and when she did, she threatened him. And here she thought it was because of asking for desert.

How could she have forgotten that? This time she did what he had done. Rub her hand behind her make. She moved again in her seat and she watches Chris watch her. It's like he was looking for words to use or maybe other proverbs.

That had her smile and when she realized what she was doing, she covers it with a cough.

"I'm no good with apologize Maya."

Great.

Maya thought. She was looking forward to proverbs.

"But I'm will to do this for our marriage. I know what I did was wrong. It was inhuman of me to do all the things that I did to you. I hurt you from the word go. From the very first time I met you and in really sorry. Sorry that I let you down when you needed me to be with you.

"At that time I was confused, Maya. I know it's no excuse for what I did but I couldn't think of any other way. I had this perfect life life and in a blink of an eye, I'm forced to marry someone that I don't know. I mean, it was a shock to me and hell in my life.

"I was just preparing to get engaged to this beautiful woman that I've known like almost my life. The woman that I saw in my dreams. The one I saw as mother of my kids. My best friend who loved me despite my flaws and out of blues, I'm forced to marry a stranger.

"Someone that I only met once. Someone that I kissed ones in my life. How else was I supposed to take it? It wasn't my first time to kiss someone on stage and neither was it my last. That's what every artist does everyday and they're not forced into marring the girl.

"And there you were, wanting me to live everything that I ever wanted to marry you. I got hurt, Maya. I was hurt that once my so perfect life wasn't perfect at all. I was hurt that Kimberly was hurt by me. I let her down. I mean, I had promised her heaven yet I gave her hell. I gave her hell since I was marrying you.

"I didn't keep my promise to her. To always make her happy and for that, I swore to make you pay. I hated it when your dad asked if you'll marry me and you said yes with all smiles. I wanted to jump on you at that moment and straggle you to death. God, I so want to see you lifeless. I could stand you saying yes father to everything that you guys said.

"To me at that moment, I just filled every missing gaps for myself. I just thought you and your dad were on mission to destroy me. I didn't know why since you're richer than I could ever be. I mean, your dad was the best doctor in the whole country which made him the most paid doctor in the country. He had money. Then he is now a governor. As for you, you didn't need your dads name or money to be known. You had made your own name Maya. Your top best surgeons in the country and everyone knows you for who you're and not for your father's fame.

"So, you made me wonder why me? Why me when I can't be even a quarter of your riches. That made me vow to revenge on. To me, you're dad's girl and the only way to hurt him, it was through you. That's why I began to hurt you after I said I do to you. I called you names. I pushed you to your limit just to let you know who was in charge. I never cared if you had a good day or bad, all I wanted was for you to know you messed with the wrong guy. My mission was to make you fill my wrath.

"And when I saw things weren't going as planned, I thought you're also making your own moves and I would do worse than I did before. And when I met your dad, everything click to me. When you showed me those bruises on you stomach, I mean scars, I knew how wrong I was. I saw how hurt you were and that made me how much a of a monster I was. I hated myself for that. For everything that I ever did to you. I mean, I'm no different from your father. But I can apologize.

"I'm sorry for everything Maya. I'm sorry for kissing you on my stage. I shouldn't have kissed you. But I did and I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you got another scar because of me. I'm sorry that you had to be in a hospital because of me. I'm sorry that you faked a smile because of me. I'm sorry that I hurt from the word go. I'm sorry that you paid for my mistakes. I'm so sorry that I even brought Kimberly on our honeymoon. I'm sorry that I let her hurt you also. I'm sorry that I used your name to make money.

"Sorry for everything, Maya. Sorry I wasn't there when you needed someone to talk to. Sorry that you were all alone when I was supposed to be there for you. You can put all the blame on me. I deserve it. You can out the blame on me Maya. All. But I'm really truly sorry. I just hope that you'll find it in your heart to forgive me. I'm sorry."

Maya held her tears back when he finished to speak. They're threatening to escape her eyes. He even apologized for her father's mistake. How could she put the blame on him? It wasn't his fault alone. She also played part in it. So she had to say something. Anything at that matter.

"Well, I want to di..."

Chris wiped his tears away looking at her, "I get it, it was what I said. I'll let my lawyer start process the papers tomorrow."

"What are you talking about?" She asked looking at him.

"I know you want a divorce," he said looking anywhere but to her, "I'll grant it to you, Maya."☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐