Sanctuary's Fiend

I was sitting in English class and couldn’t concentrate.

The whole week had been a struggle. I went to as many classes as I could, but when my head wasn’t spinning, I was so hungry. No amount of food could get rid of this hunger. I’d tried. I ate as much as I could until my belly swelled and I almost threw up, but I was still hungry.

I knew it wouldn’t work. On Monday, I’d caught myself looking at Peter. At his neck. I had drooled at the thought of what was beneath his skin.

I had found that I felt weak and dizzy when on my own or with other supes, but when I was around humans, I felt strong. They were all a cool glass of water in the middle of the desert. Irresistible. When I smelled them I was moving faster and feeling stronger. I guessed these were Draugr instincts. I think… I think I was hunting them.

I shook my head, trying to get rid of the memory. But it wouldn’t go, and I couldn’t concentrate.

Because of him.

He smelled so good. I was all the way at the back of the class, and he was at the front.

I don’t know why I could smell him over all the others, but it was definitely him I was smelling. He was talking about something. Books probably. Or grammar. Who knew? He was wearing a gray waistcoat and pants, with a light blue shirt underneath. It was too hot for him. I didn’t need to be able to smell his sweat to know that.

Mr. Anderton took a break from the blackboard to look in the textbook. As he did, he dusted his hands off, and to try and cool himself down, rolled up his sleeves. As soon as he did, I saw why I could smell him.

He had a bandage around his left forearm. I couldn’t see any blood, but I knew it was there.

I felt my whole body pulse. I wanted to see the cut. I wouldn’t drink any, I’d just look at it. That would be fine. I’d look at his blood, and then I’d sit back down. Sit back down?

“Yes, Reliquiae?” Mr. Anderton said.

I was standing up. Everyone was looking at me. I mumbled something and sat back down. I heard Sasha’s nasty snicker. He carried on talking.

I could feel my legs tensing, trying to get me to move. To get closer. To quench the thirst.

I gripped the edge of my desk. I scrunched my eyes shut. I could do nothing but focus on not moving. There was no voice in my head, no angel on one shoulder, devil on the other. No question of right or wrong. No conscience. Just physical instinct.

Someone tapped my left shoulder. I opened my eyes and looked. It was Ariel, pointing at her phone. She wanted me to check mine. I shook my head, not trusting myself to loosen my grip on the desk.

A few seconds passed, and someone tapped me on my right shoulder. Erin leaned over and whispered in my ear. “Ariel says to ask you what’s up?”

Through gritted teeth, I whispered back, “I’m. Just. Hungry.”

After our meeting at the bunker, we’d told Erin what had happened, as she’d be joining us when we went hunting with Johnny’s elf gang tonight. Hunting for me, I think. So she knew what I meant when I said ‘hungry’.

“Is there anything we can–”

“Do you have something to share with the whole class, ladies?” Mr. Anderton asked.

Erin pulled back and said, “Sorry, sir.”

He went back to writing on the board. His right hand, moving chalk, his left hand, in his pocket. Showing off his bandage.

I gripped the desk even tighter.

The bell rang, and everyone slammed shut books, and jumped out of their seats. With the speed and efficiency of a military operation, everyone began to leave despite the protests of Mr. Anderton.

“No need to leave so fast, everyone. You’ll make a teacher think you don’t like him!”

No one responded. He had said it halfheartedly, having learned that you couldn’t stop the herd instinct.

I wanted to be first out the door. I wanted to run away. But part of me wanted to stay. I was slow to rise, unpeeling my fingers from the desk edge. I slid out of the desk and stood up. Ariel and Erin were waiting for me. Had they gone through these same urges, just in their own way? Was I making a bigger deal out of this than anyone else?

“Reliquiae, can I speak to you for a moment, please,” Mr. Anderton called.

I glanced at my friends. They were looking at my desk. I looked down and saw they were seeing the crushed and splintered wood. I had done that. Together, they each grabbed one of my hands and led me forwards. At Mr. Anderton’s desk, they stood in front of me.

Mr. Anderton looked up, and confusion crossed his face. “Don’t worry ladies, I’ll only be a moment with your friend.” He nodded towards me. “You two can wait outside.”

“That’s fine, we’ll wait with her here,” Erin said.

He was about to protest, but he must have seen something in my face. I don’t know what he saw. Pain? Fear? Hunger? Desperation?

His eyes glanced down to the fountain pen he was using. He ran his fingers along it absently as he spoke. “No problem. Reliquiae–”

“Just Rel,” I said.

He shifted in his seat. “Of course. Rel. I wanted to talk about last Friday–”

He talked for a few seconds more, but I couldn’t take my eyes from his forearm. This close, all I could smell was the rent skin that lay beneath that bandage. I didn’t hear what he said.

“What happened?” I interrupted him, pointing at his arm.

I felt Erin and Ariel’s grip tighten on my hands.

“This? Oh. Just a scratch. A graze really.” He was lying! “Anyway, your father and I spoke, and I talked to Richard, and we all thought that, if you’re willing, we’d like for you to continue tutoring–”

“Can I see it?” Like I said, just a peek was all I needed. Then I’d be okay and could get on with my day.

“Umm… see what?” he asked.

“Got to go, sir, don’t want to be late for class!” Erin shouted as she pushed, and Ariel pulled. Before I knew it I was out in the hallway. The smell of blood became less potent, and I could feel my self control returning as the busy hallway overwhelmed my heightened senses, allowing me to think clearly again.

“Oh God, I just asked to see his cut, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, I think he thinks you’re really weird.” Erin said, the two of them still guiding me - which was good, because the weakness had returned.

Erin checked her phone as it buzzed and said, “Yep, I agree. Let’s get her home.”

“No, I’m fine now. Don’t worry, I can walk on my own, come on.”

They shared a look, but let go of me. I stumbled. They both shook out their hands. Possibly I’d been holding on tighter than I thought.

With free hands, I could check my phone.

Okay, but you’re staying home tonight.

“No!” I blurted out. “No. Tonight will be good. I have to go!”

Uhh, why?

“I think… I think that I want to… to hunt. Yeah. I think that hunting something will… fix me.”

They both shared another look, but we carried on to the next class.

That was true. I really did hope that my instincts just wanted me to hunt. Something. Anything. Because if that didn’t fix it, then I didn’t know how much longer I could stop myself.

I’d have to feed.