Roachville

The sun lit my steps on the way to Vi and Bek, and it was still shining hard in the crowded back garden. I greeted the few people I knew. Pippa and Matti who worked with Bek sat on small camping chairs. They nodded at me and looked on as if they were perched on a very tall tree. A loud skinny guy was gesticulating near them and they kept nodding at him, too. A small group of people gathered near Bek. He was flipping meat by the barbeque, while telling a story with wild gestures. I grabbed a burger from a cardboard plate and shoved it inside a bun with poppy seeds. There was no Dijon mustard on display and that made me a little bit sad, but only assholes feel sorry for themselves. So I went into the kitchen and found a small jar hidden in some recess of the fridge door. I had put it there myself a few months ago for this very kind of emergency. As I smeared the yellow paste on one side of the burger, Vi bubbled in and I yanked her by the arm before she could flutter back into the garden.

‘Hey, who are all these people?’ I asked, my mouth full of burger.

She looked at me, goggle-eyed and replied after a few seconds of uncertainty. ‘Hey, there you are!’ she beamed and processed my question. I munched on the burger.

‘Do you know what, I don’t fucking know!’ She laughed. ‘But isn’t it a great party!’

‘Yeah…’ I replied and before I had time to shrug, she disappeared out of the room, carried away by her long skinny legs.

The party proceeded with its loud music and guests. I made small talk with miscellaneous people and I was quite successful at it. But after a while I didn’t have the energy, and I found myself near Vi and Bek’s tiny pond in one of the corners of the small garden. Clouds kept on flying high above our heads and I’d had a bit to drink and smoke over the last couple of hours, so I couldn’t say if I was drunk or sad. I wanted to go home but I didn’t want to be alone. At the same time I would have been quite happy to float away from Vi and Bek’s busy garden. Maybe mixing Ibuprofene and weed wasn’t such a great idea…

I noticed a movement under the fleshy plants by the pond. It must have been a cute shrew snuffling around. I trained my eyes on the trail of moving vegetation. As it got very close to me, I didn’t move a muscle and the small creature poked its tiny head and really odd whiskers.

‘Fuck!’ I jumped up, dropping my glass and bumping into someone. It was no shrew, but a giant cockroach invading my friends’ garden. Feeling hypnotised and very conscious of the naga in my rucksack, I became aware of my surroundings melting into nothingness. All that mattered was this huge insect directing its antennas towards me and sending off menacing vibes. I stamped on it again and again and again, until the cockroach’s body stopped moving and it had become almost indistinguishable from the soil. I kept my eyes on the corpse because I knew how resilient these beasts were. I flinched as Bek rested his hand gingerly on my shoulder.

‘I think you should stop now, you’re freaking people out,’ he whispered.

I looked up at the silent crowd. So many eyes staring at me.