Revolt (Legends and Love)

I can’t face the cameras, questions, and people. I can’t do it. I can’t even turn my phone back on after it blew up the first time I did.

What do I do? I do what any coward does. I run. I discharge myself with their advice and medication and I manage to arrange a car to pick me up around back, thanks to the hospital who clearly wants to avoid any bad press. Once home, I pack a bag, and then I’m on the road before anyone even realizes I’ve been here.

I leave the city lights and all the trouble behind.

I never should have come back, but then I wouldn’t have met them and I wouldn’t have fallen in love.

I wouldn’t have found my sound again.

Right now, my regret mixes with my hope, and it’s too much for me to handle.

I hit a familiar road, one I took all those months ago, and like then, my heart is broken, so I escape to the same place I did before.

I need to figure out what I’m going to do next.

Is this the end of Reign Harrow, or just the beginning?

I settle in for the two-day drive, planning to drive right through, racing from my worries and my heart, from them, not knowing if we can ever be together again.

“I wondered when I would see you again.” The familiar southern drawl settles all my nerves and I collapse in my seat.

The two-day drive was long. I parked in my car and kept my face hidden. The gunshot wound hurts, but I’ve had worse in my past, and I keep it clean and dressed and take the medication, so that’s all that matters.

My eyes are drawn to the view around us, making the last few days all worthwhile.

My seat faces the dock and water, and I look out at the view that healed me. This place brought me back to life and gave me reason to fight. Turning my head, I meet the blue eyes of the woman who gave me this place.

Vinette.

Wrinkles crowd her smiling eyes, her tiny eyebrows gray in her age. Her lips are tilted in a crooked smile, and her gray hair is curled back away from her face. She wears a perfectly pressed sundress, her body both lithe and muscular even now.

One look and I want to cry and laugh. “You knew I’d come back?”

“I’m not a fool, Reign Harrow.”

My eyes widen. The whole time I was here before, she never once called me by my full name. I never even told her what it was. I liked being anonymous here. I liked being just Reign.

She grins like she knows my thoughts. “I always knew who you were, child, even then. I have a TV.” She winks.

“Then why . . . ,” I whisper.

“Everyone comes here for a reason,” she murmurs. “Me included. I had a feeling there was a reason you ran to this tiny town, so I left you alone.” She looks at me sadly. “Are you okay?”

“No, not one fucking bit,” I admit, my lip trembling as tears form in my eyes. I stare back out at the water, gripping the arm of the chair. Nothing has changed here. Not the tiny road signs, the dirt roads, or the way the water touches the sky as if kissing it.

It makes my heart unravel and the tears fall.

As usual, Vinette lets me work through my thoughts, never pushing. I rented the cabin, which is behind us, when I first ran away. Something about this town called to me when I drove through it—call it fate or just an empty gas tank, but I stayed a night. That night turned into two, then three. Something here made me relax, and then one morning, I saw Vinette out here, enjoying the sun in the space between the cabins, and I just sat down. The one I rented used to be her daughter’s.

We didn’t speak for a week. We just enjoyed the peace together.

When we did, though, she always saw the truth and had a way to help me deal with my thoughts and feelings. I came for the peace, but I stayed for her wisdom and friendship—one that didn’t ask for anything, that didn’t need anything, that just gave.

“I thought I was so strong,” I say, and as usual, the words pour out. When I glance at her, I try to blink away the tears. “I thought I was so fucking strong, but I feel so weak. I fell in love, Vinette. I fell in love so hard and they were perfect, everything I’m not. I thought I could be what they needed, and that I wouldn’t need to depend on them, but all my bravado and talk, the great rock princess, Reign Harrow . . .” My gaze returns to the water. It’s so calm, unlike the raging in my heart. “And I’m still the scared little girl hiding in the dark from her father, unable to protect my little brother.”

“Reign—”

“I couldn’t even keep myself safe. I couldn’t even fight back when he came for me. They had to save me time and time again and I let them. I let them hurt me and lie to me because I was so desperate to be fucking loved, to feel safe and protected because I’m so fucking weak.”

“Have you finished?”

I snap my mouth shut and glance at her.

“No offense, Reign, but that’s bullshit.”

My mouth drops open. It’s the first swear word I’ve ever heard her use. “What?” I stutter.

“You heard me, child. It’s bullshit. Everyone needs someone sometime. No one is ever as strong as they pretend to be. Everyone fears something. You are so much more than that scared little girl.” Taking my hand, she squeezes it. “It wasn’t your job to save your brother, Reign, and it wasn’t your fault he died. You need to forgive yourself, child, because we both know he does. You were a kid, Reign.”

I bite my lip, tears rolling down my cheeks.

“And you grew up into an amazing woman. A kind one. One who brought me breakfast every morning, who helped me make sweet tea because she knew it was my absolute favorite. Who helped Ned from down the road fix up his roof because his back hurt without complaint. It’s not great public acts that make us, Reign, but the small ones. They show who we are, especially when your life isn’t in front of a camera. I know you. You are a brilliant woman. You’re smart, talented, beautiful, kind, loving, and yes, you’ve been hurt. You let it harden you, but you were growing and learning. Don’t ever call yourself weak again. It is not weak to retreat. It takes great strength to acknowledge you’re struggling and pull back to deal with it. Reign Harrow, this world is a complicated place, and as for love, there is nothing more complicated than that, but I’m betting those men never once cared that you leaned on them. I’m betting they loved it because they love you. How could they not? It’s time, Reign.”

“Time?” I mumble.

“The birds still sing, Reign, the sun still rises, and the world still turns. Everything moves on, and yesterday is forgotten, so why can’t you forget? Move on, Reign. It’s time. You left that little house and the bodies behind a long time ago, but it’s time to get up now and walk out that door. It’s time to forgive yourself.” She pats my hand. “Stop making excuses about why things won’t work and stop running at the first sign of trouble to protect yourself. Everything else will fall into place. Our place in this world isn’t always what we thought it would be, but from the happiness I saw on my screen, I would say you found yours. Fight for it, whatever that entails.”

“I don’t know if I can,” I admit, looking back at the water. “It would be easier just to disappear and forget.”

“It would,” she concedes. “But that’s the coward’s way out and you are not a coward. Not like me.”

“Vinette.” I frown, looking at her.

“I never told you my story, Reign, but I think it’s time.” She settles back, her eyes on the water and a sad smile on her lips. “My true name is Vinette Wilson.” The name is familiar, but I don’t know why. “I was a ballerina, one of the best in the world for a great many years. It seems like a lifetime ago. I never thought I could love anything as much as I loved dancing. Being on that stage brought me to life. It wasn’t about the applause or the money or the skills. I felt free when I danced across that stage.”

“Vin, I had no idea,” I whisper.

“Many don’t. I buried that life a very long time ago. It was better to let go than to let it rot me from the inside out, but even now, a part of me yearns for that stage. Don’t let it do that to you, Reign. Time isn’t always kind, but I’m getting ahead of myself. The night before my big performance, one that would have put me in the history books, I was attacked by someone I knew. He was the stage director. I knew he wanted me, I had even flirted to get what I wanted, but that night, something broke inside me. When it was over, I just lay there, like a broken marionette, as he left and told me to warm up for my performance tomorrow. I didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t report it. I should have, but I was a coward, Reign. I ran, and I didn’t stop running for a very long time, not until I got here and saw that old cabin. I made it my home, and then I found out I was pregnant.

“My daughter was born from his attack. I hated her at first. I wanted to get rid of her, but the first time I heard her cry, I knew the truth. She was all mine, and it was my duty to protect her at all costs. No matter the path that brought her to me, I could choose my future, and I did. It wasn’t what everyone else would have chosen, but it was mine and it was a happy one. I always regretted never telling anyone, though, never standing up. I always regretted never going back and showing my daughter how to stand up for herself. I cut off my old life but it never left me, and neither did my love for performing. Something like that . . . we are born with it, Reign. We are born to do it. No matter what happens, you have to be true to yourself. I wasn’t for a very long time. It was only when I lost my daughter to cancer ten years back that I started to realize how cowardly I’d been. I hid from my gift, my passion, and my past. I don’t want you to grow old and be regretful of what you could have had. I don’t. Trust me, it’s not nice. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I can’t change my life, and I wouldn’t because I got to love so deeply it will never leave me, but I can’t let you run from yours like I did mine. Shit happens, Reign, horrible fucking shit, but it’s how we deal with it that makes us who we are. I’m not saying don’t cry and not to be angry at the world, but don’t give up on it.”

“Vin,” I sob, my heart breaking for the woman who became my rock without ever letting her own cracks show.

“Look.” I follow her gaze to the birds on the water. “They know they could be attacked, yet they still flock to the water. We are those birds, Reign. Do we flock and soar high in victory, or do we fall and sink to the bottom? That’s our choice in life. We make it what it is. I made my place, and now it’s time you make yours. You’re always welcome here, but I don’t want your sad eyes here again. I want those happy ones on my screen. I want to watch you shine—maybe because I’m a selfish old lady who wants to see a woman succeed when no one else thought she could. What I’m trying to say, Reign, is live so big you scar this world with your brilliance. Love so hard that at the end, you’re not scared. Don’t go meekly into the dark. Fight it with everything within you. I know you can, if you are brave enough to forgive and to . . .”

“Move on,” I whisper.

“Move on.” She nods, glancing over at me with a smile. “Now, I’m betting those four men who have been watching us for a long time are the ones you love, no?”

I turn and find them waiting before the cabin, protecting me. Part of me knew they would follow me. Deep down, I knew they wouldn’t let me go. Did I test them by bringing them here?

Is Vin right? Am I finding excuses to sabotage my own happiness by thinking I don’t deserve it because of my past?

“Yes,” I croak as I stare at them.

“It’s your choice, Reign. Stay and live with regrets or forgive and move on.”

I look at her, searching her gaze. “I’m so sorry for what happened to you, Vin, but you are not a coward. You had the strength to bear a child born from hate and destruction and love it so much that even now, I see her with you. You are not a coward, Vinette. You are a strong, brilliant woman who took a lost woman and gave her a shoulder when no one else would, and I will never forget what you did for me.” Standing, I smile down at her, and she kisses my hand and pushes me.

My decision is made, one I already made deep down.

I will forgive them and stop running.

Everyone makes mistakes, and I know the one they made was out of loyalty for me, and maybe if I hear them out, we might just have a chance at something brilliant—something I’m unable to live without.

“Go, Reign. Be brilliant. Be what you were born to be.”

I smile as I turn to them, and it only grows.

Walking around the chairs, I head toward them.

Even now, I see the hope in their eyes, hope I’ll come home to them.

For a second, I’m brought back to the moment I first met them, knowing even then they would change my world. I wasn’t wrong, and I thank a god I don’t believe in for that.

For them.

We can solve anything if we are together, and I’m very tired of running. Vin is right, it is my choice, and I choose them.

I start to run, needing to get there quicker, and the smiles that break out across their faces only make me move faster. They meet me halfway, wrapping their arms around me.

“I missed you,” I admit. “I forgive you, and I missed you.”

“We missed you too,” Raff replies, pulling away. “I love you, Miss Harrow, and know this. Listen carefully. We’ll never hide anything from you again. I promise we did it to protect you. We want the best for you. I’m not saying we won’t make mistakes, but I swear if you give us a chance, we’ll never let you be alone again.”

Some might say I gave in too easily, but if a man is willing to kill another to keep me safe, then I would be a fool not to forgive them. We’re new at this, but I have no doubt that what he said was true.

They kept a secret, which was wrong, but they did it with good intentions.

It’s time to let go of the past.

It’s time to start fresh.

Life is too fucking short not to.

“I love you too.” I kiss Raff deeply and turn to Astro. “And I love you.” I kiss him, wiping away his tears as I turn to Cillian. “I love you.” I kiss him before turning to Dal. “I love you, my beautifully flawed protector.” I kiss him deeply. I let them hold me, my voice soft. “We need to talk and discuss what happened, but I’m all in if you’ll have me. You made mistakes and so did I. I shouldn’t have shut down, shouldn’t have run away just because it was easier. I should have fought.”

“It doesn’t matter now. All that matters is that we are together,” Astro says, staring into my eyes, and just like that, I forgive them.

Humans are flawed beings, but holding onto the hurt will only make me bitter and lonely. I have a chance at a love so deep, it will scar my world, and this, like Vin mentioned, is worth fighting for no matter what.

“You are our life,” Cillian says, squeezing my hand.

“Our reason for living,” Dal adds.

“I don’t plan on changing though,” I start, needing them to know. “I’ll still be a pain in the ass.”

Astro smirks. “Our pain.”

“Baby, we never wanted you to change. We love you for who you are,” Raff promises.

“Okay then.” I snuggle back into their arms, where I should have been all along.

Sometimes things need to break apart to come back together, and when they do, their flaws are what make them shine with beauty. Those imperfections make them unique, one of a kind.

Just like our love.

I vow in that moment to never hold myself back from them again. I’ll tell them I love them every day, and I won’t be scared of it anymore because I know wherever I go, they will follow.

I let them hold me as the sun shines down on us, and when I pull back, I’m crying and grinning. “Take me home?”

“Anything you ask, Miss Harrow.”