Rejection on the Alpha #1

CHAPTER 13: Acceptance Is Key

“You know, they say women are too soft-hearted to rule.”

The goblet in my hand stills as I look over to where Elias sits next to a guard of Nicolai Darkling’s, a corrupt and perverse enforcer that stares at the breasts of the women around him like they’re his next meal. Elias raises an eyebrow at him, “And yet you would not be here without one. Funny that.”

The enforcer scowls, “I did not say we didn’t need them.” His nose looked riddled with past breaks, sweat from the heated air of the room where fire goblets hang from the walls this evening, instead of just the chandelier candles above. I purse my lips.

Nicolai cups the hand I had around a steak knife with a wooden handle, I snap my eyes to his impenetrable silver ones, he removes my fingers from the engraved hilt and holding my hand in his when I can’t pull away but try hard to do so, “Jacob, change shifts with Liam at the prison cells. Now.” He instructs aloud, not through the mind-link. I watch the wretched enforcer leave on order.

Elias studies me over the rim of his goblet, the red wine graces his lips, “You two will have your first open combat sessions this evening. Celestine, have you gotten use to the weather?” He asks me, while Nicolai takes a gulp of his drink.

I look to Elias, “No, I haven’t gotten use to the snow yet.” I murmur.

Nicolai strokes my hand gently, “Eat something.” He urges gently, “Unless the food is not to your liking, my darling.” He whispers against my temple, before his eyes glaze over elsewhere, he steps away and leaves with an apology on those lips. My shoulders droop in relief. Elias takes Nicolai’s old position...every time I wish to call him Martin, I find myself hating it. He’s Martin when he works hard to get us closer, that intimacy stunt last night cost me more so than him. And I feel as though I still didn’t get everything.

“The food tastes like rotten deer, so I don’t blame you.” He gruffly says down to me. Robert tenses in his seat next to Reina, I almost forget they were all here next to me.

“Mind if we take a walk?” I ask of Elias.

He nods, gesturing to his company, “Can they follow?” He asks, I nod and he walks us out, taking the lead while his company of men follow silently behind us.

Elias cups his hands, “What plagues your mind, dear one?” He wonders, eyes roaming the halls yet he somehow sensed it.

I stop and face him, “I need to know if there is a creature on this planet, or even on any realm that can identify whether a false bond has been made by the gods.” Is the first thing I blurt out to him.

He raises an eyebrow, “Your wolf is not electrified by Darkling’s presence?” He murmurs, furrowing his eyebrows now.

I feel the weight of the pathetic black and gold dress I wear, a neck holder one with jewellery running down my spine, sleeveless in the fact a coldness on the outside could never touch within, “I am something more than just a wolf. No, I don’t feel the sparks every mate should feel with their true bonder, that is not Nicolai for me, I don’t understand it. He’s uncontrollable and ferocious because normally mated couples are fully mated by now.” I mutter.

“You’re telling me you’re still a virgin?” He asks me, hesitantly.

I blink at him, “I’m...what kind of question is that?” I grumble.

“You do realise, when Nicolai Darkling moves to reclaim his throne, the eldest of councils in his realm will demand proof of a claiming, which is not just a bite. It is of ancient genetics that once a mated couples meets, that couple finds themselves in a heat within just a few days of being next to one another. You have not been through a heat?” He whispers.

I shake my head truthfully, “What do you mean by his council? What could they enforce?” I ask him, his guidance had helped so far...partially.

He sighs, “They could enforce a type of initiation. Like in old times for the human realm, nations of royalty brought together where councils would watch the consummation themselves. As witnesses, when in fact I think it’s just ridiculous pornographers unable to get anything up, old folk with male pride and disgusting fantasies.” He shrugs. I wanted to vomit.

“Aren’t those ancient traditions not undertaken in this century?”

He studies me, “Why don’t you feel for him what has been made obvious based on the way he looks at you? He’s infatuated.” He murmurs.

“Infatuated, or obsessed and dangerous? He has caged me for rejecting him, when I first got here, he threw me to whatever creatures were out in the snow and made me find a way to safety in retaliation for rejecting him publicly. He forced a bond, a bite on me, Cardinal. Darkling was secluded from the other clans because of their sense of superiority—they lack democracy. If he is truly Nicolai Darkling, and the initiation I read about in history is some sort of disgusting way of becoming a royal, then he will allow it. He won’t stop it, even when I do not want it. Pleasure is one thing, love is another and it is not in this picture.” I explain to him. He runs his eyes over my rustic blonde curls.

He studies me closely, “Is it Darkling you are afraid of...or bonding with another when you have not experienced or seen love in your own life?” He critically analyses me.

I stare into his eyes, “There is no bond here.”

He sighs, “That can only be determined through that of an old myth, a wives tale of blood and bond. Something that I believe would only be located at the Magisterium. An elemental capital in realms not even you have seen in your wildest daydreams.”

I snap my eyes up at the word elemental, “The elemental races can use blood to identify mates?” I whisper, shocked.

He raises an eyebrow at me, “Something only the King of the Elemental Lineages would allow and that is more far-fetched than you seeing a dragon, which are extinct, might I mention. Dear girl, all wolves trust their moon goddess, who shifts the tides of the human realm and the souls of the werewolf one that howl for prayers to be answered by her and only her. I’m afraid such tools are not made for this realm.” His words change a force within me, I stare down at my fingers.

“Can only an elemental find this realm?” I ask, resuming my walk.

“They can, I’m afraid it is not possible for you, child. Now, as to why you feel your bond is not working, perhaps this tournament may build on that. You may grow to love the old king of the lycanthrope realm. You may even become Queen.” He sounds loyal.

But to who?

I stare at him, he tilts his head, “You may hate the title, my dear, but you hold the blood of one. Even an elemental, who’s characteristics abide the nature around us. Earth. Water. Fire. Air. I realise the stories of elemental regions are like cities of heavens and hells, but each realm has their own duties, but their own demons. Your demon does not live here. In fact, all he wishes to do is see that you love him for who he is, and help him grow out of his own demons.”

My nostrils flare, why must that be my job?

“You think I should concede what my heart is telling me to run from?” I whisper.

“And why is your heart telling you to run when that is all it has been doing since I met you?” He rests that question in my mind like one would rest a man-eating beast in a child’s bed. It’s not subtle, and all you can do is hope the child isn’t eaten by morning, just so the beast can understand the difference between friend and foe.

I snap my eyes to him, “Because I have no idea what home is and you’re telling me this is a safe place to land when I know it freaking isn’t, Cardinal? I am asking for your advice.”

He stares at me, “And I have given you that, dear.” I swear his pockets were jiggling with gold.

I study him, could I trust him after all?

He smiles and embraces me gently, “I know you do not wish to hear it, but it is the truth. I will leave you to your thoughts for now, my dear. Come find me if you wish to hear another story of the elemental lineages, I hear you were quite interested before. Those books were the right choice, have another look.” He tells me, nodding to his company.

I stare at him as he leaves, before feeling another presence lingering in the shadows, lurking in the halls. Fuming too.

“What if you do not accept what you see? When proof is shown?” Nicolai spits in question.

I stare at him, “What if you do not accept it? What if you’re the one who’s wrong?” My last words.

Before I shake my head, not really surprised he was following us and listening as I find my way to a guest room on the lower levels, easily sniffing out one in the long corner, only I regret my every decision when I unlock it with a Bobby pin the second I see what I wished I had never laid my eyes on. Paintings, sketches, landscapes drawn up and scattered across the room.

My eyes widen at what I see in the very middle, a canvas painted of a sharpened, small blonde girl sitting against the wooden table, playing with her food, yet every damn stroke of paint is carefully constructed. Like it’s a vision of some kind.

I blink once, “Close the door, please Celestine.” I hear him say behind me.

I close the door, almost robotically as I slowly turn towards his red-rimmed eyes. He opens his mouth, I hold up one finger, my mouth ajar, “No...do not say anything.” I say, trailing off as I blink at least six times, I take one step to the side, before turning back and pointing to the door, my face scrunching up as I stare at him, incredulously.

I point to the door over my shoulder, “What the hell is this?” He stills, eyes penetrating mine.

I blink, “You seriously drew me, then painted me...like a freaking—”

He cuts me off, “I beg of you to please stop.”

I really could not believe it.

“It’s not...like that,” His expression twists in pain, he squeezes his eyes shut and takes a long breath, then another and one more as he fists his hands at his side, “You never let me get close enough and when you do it’s a bargain, just to talk to you, I have to ask to hold you, I have to beg to let me kiss you. I have to get violent when you do.” He mumbles under his breath, trudging over to the door and locking it with a key in his pocket.

He stares.

He turns away from me and walks down the hall, slouching as his footsteps become soundless and completely silent, he moves up the stairs without another look in my direction. I turn towards the door with a blood curdling expression, “I seriously cannot believe he drew me.” I whisper in slightly disgusted shock.

The bastard damn well drew me.

Not only that—he painted me.

He freaking painted me like some kind of lover. He stares at me for only one more second, before he turns and leaves with his head down, I clench my fist, I probably could have handled that better. Maybe, if it didn’t creep me out more than anything, there was a drawing in there that looked like me when I was asleep. I suddenly freeze when I catch a shadow move.

I was fast enough, shoving Reina out of the way from where she was standing, watching and listening as the creature leaps. The black slick creature came out of nowhere, the momentum of its sharp sword, transformed by its hand. I use its strength, its stamina and watch it scream as the black, slick Sith releases that scream. It disappears before it hits the tile floor below.

“WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!” Robert roars from above, leaping down. Martin was next to me in a blink of an eye. He helps her up as she stares at me, wide-eyed, looking catatonic and frozen. Martin reaches for me, whether the Sith’s skin was still against my fingers, I felt like I was still touching it. I could still hear its scream.

I looked into its eyes, those black, soulless eyes, “S-she pushed me out...of the way.” Reina whispers, still in shock. Martin’s fingers tremble as he curls his fingers along my cheek.

“You saved a pack member.” He whispers, breathless.

He turns to Reina, Robert lowers his forehead to her temple, pulling her in close, whispering something to her, Martin looks between them, “Take her to the healers, make sure she’s alright.” He whispers to Robert, turning his silver eyes back to mine. I turn back to look down, past the wooden railing.

“How did you defeat it?” He asks me, low voice of tone, although he was once again, masking his emotions, as if trying to barricade me from his mind, something he didn’t need to do because I wasn’t interested in reading his thoughts.

I step away from the railing, “It’s target wasn’t me, it tried to stop the second I moved Reina out of the way. If those things are getting into this place undetected, then you need to figure out why and how since we cannot control them. I need a bloody shower.” I mutter, still moving forward. I was still angry from Cardinal’s choice of advice.

“Celestine.” He calls out to me.

I face him, he steps forward, closing whatever distance I made until he stands in front of me.

“What will it take for you to accept me?” He asks me.

“Is what he said true? That if we’re not mated by the time you reclaim your kingdom, then once you do and announce who I’m supposed to be, there’s some stupid, disgusting initiation we have to partake in?” I question him.

He stares me down, “I would never allow that, but we must be consummated.”

“Why?” I question him, “Why is it so freaking important?”

He narrows his eyes, “Every other mate is happy. Every other mate is bonded. The rarity of rejections is made and you did so in front of courts of clans, because of sparks? Because you do not feel an electrical pulse your childhood story-teller infatuated you with? That there are life-like pulses that chemically attach to people. That there must be some genetic understanding by the moon goddess’s choices in her pairings? Is that what I am up against? A story once told to a child the way Santa Claus is spread to human children?” He ridicules me.

I stare at him, what could I say to that?

He scoffs as he stares at me, “Don’t paint me as the villain when you have yet to look in the goddamn mirror.”