FULL NOVELXO Queens and Monsters: Chapter 10
“Have you ever meditated before?” Gigi sat across from me on my bed, cross-legged, hands on her knees.
“No, but I had a doctor give me some breathing exercises once.”
“That’s a great place to start. Take some deep breaths and clear your mind. Try to relax your shoulders and close your eyes. Find your center.”
I tried to do it but everything felt wrong. I was too conscious of myself, felt too awkward.
“Okay forget everything I just said,” Gigi laughed. “Sit however you feel comfortable. Put your hands in your lap or lie down. Whatever feels natural.”
I closed my eyes and tried to picture what felt normal. Lying down seemed too vulnerable. I moved my hands to my lap and felt my shoulders finally relax. It was easier to breathe.
“There it is. Keep doing that.”
I liked this position, but after a minute I got bored and started fidgeting.
“Take a long breath in and then let it all out through your mouth,” she instructed. “Now long inhale, long exhale.”
I continued to follow her instructions, realizing I was indeed drifting away from my body, from the constant string of thoughts and anxieties.
“Now turn your inner gaze from yourself, outward.”
The room was dark and the air cool. Downstairs I heard the clink of dishes as breakfast was prepared. Then to a darkness on the edge of everything that seemed to glimmer and ripple. In my mind I reached out to touch this black blanket. A rush of power filled my veins, images I didn’t understand flipped through my mind, and the whispers I heard before returned, only now there were hundreds of them talking at once.
And they were loud.
I gasped and threw my hands over my ears. The connection instantly dropped and I sighed with relief.
“So that’s the Plane,” Gigi said. “The way you interact with it will be different than anyone else, and how you get there might be meditation, or it might be something else.”
I shook my hands because they tingled. “That was…a lot.”
“What was it like for you?”
I blinked my eyes fully open, staring at my hands. “I heard the whispers again.”
“Again?”
“When I first met you…I heard whispers whenever Dray was near. Wake up, wake up, wake up. I haven’t heard them since the Awakening.”
“Oh…anything else?”
“Lots of images. It will take me awhile to figure out what I saw. And my hands. It was like they had electricity in them.” I couldn’t stop staring at them. It was as if they weren’t mine anymore. As if they belonged to a stranger.
“Your mother’s magic is strong in you.” She wrapped her hands around mine, finally calming the tingles. “That was a good start. Let’s get some food in you.”
The kitchen was exactly what I expected with a large family all together. Bethany arranged a variety of juices and coffees, Kris was flipping pancakes on the griddle, and Bo had stacks of plates and silverware. Everyone was speaking at once and I didn’t understand how anyone heard anything at all.
“I need to apologize,” Dray said low beside me. I had no idea when he arrived.
“For what?”
He pulled me to the side and away from the commotion. “The way I introduced you to drinking…it was necessary because you needed so much but…it’s not what you’ll see today. Regular drinking is boring, mundane, chaste stuff. The complete opposite of what I showed you.”
The instinctive, mind-altering, sexual drinking? Yeah, I wouldn’t be forgetting that experience ever. “All right. I’ve adjusted my expectations.”
He smiled a little. “Let me show you.” He led me into the living room with the enormous stone fireplace. Inside it a large fire burned because even with summer approaching, the morning mountain air was chilly. Above it, the television played The Empire Strikes Back. On the enormous brown leather couch sat Cass, Bridge, Vic, and Leena buried under fluffy blankets, still in their pajamas.
All of this made for a totally normal, sweet family picture. What was totally different, however, was the fact that Bridge was taking long pulls from Cass’s wrist, Vic from Bridge’s, and Leena from Vic. Like they were eating popcorn and sipping sodas, only their version was blood.
“See what I mean?” Dray asked.
I nodded slowly as he pulled me into the hallway. “So what we did before is…” I didn’t know what I was asking. Was it normal? Was it strange?
“Is intimate,” he finished. “I didn’t expect it at first but it quickly became clear we weren’t going to be able to do anything else.” He shook his head. “How can I explain this better?” He chewed on his lip. “It’s hard to describe something that has always been what it’s always been to you, you know? Think of it like love. There are different kinds, right? Mothers and children, siblings, friends, and intimate partners. That love is different in each situation. Friends sharing secrets bonds them together. Siblings growing up together and sharing the same experiences bonds them. Lovers share the most intimate parts of themselves to bond. For us that bond also must include the sharing of our blood, and so the ways we experience that bond vary based on the type of relationship we have.”
That mostly made sense. “So if I go sit down next to Cass?”
“If you offer your wrist she’ll take a drink.”
“And I’ll feel…?”
“Warm, happy tingles through your soul. The same way you feel when a friend watches a movie with you and you’re laughing at the same parts…but more.”
I nodded a lot as I processed all of this. “So the blood component amplifies everything?”
“Yes. You’ve only experienced the most extreme situation but you can see why our ancestors may have leaned into something that made them feel so good.”
Even though I was scared, I took a seat next to Cass.
“Hey! Come to join the party? Which Star Wars is the best?” she asked.
Was this like a password to get into a clubhouse? “Empire, obviously.”
Everyone turned and glared at Vic. “See? You’re wrong.” Then Cass turned back to me. “He thinks Revenge of the Sith is a masterpiece.”
“It is!” He licked Bridge’s wrist and patted her hand. “One day you’ll see past all your warm fuzzy memories of seeing Empire in the theater and realize you’re a bunch of nostalgic saps.”
Oh god. They saw these movies in the theater. What an experience that must have been, hearing “I am your father” for the first time.
Gigi slid in next to me, filling the couch to bursting. “Come on newbie. Drink up.” She waved her wrist in front of my face.
I swallowed down my nerves and offered my wrist to Cass. “Like this?”
Cass smiled warmly. “Just like this.” Then she licked my wrist and lightly sank her teeth into my skin. It was an entirely different experience. There was no shocking sudden heat surging through my veins. I wasn’t turned on or overwhelmed. Just as Dray said, a warm tingling bubbled up inside me making me feel happy and fuzzy.
“Hello!” Gigi waved her wrist closer. “Let’s go!”
Feeling a little less nervous I took her delicate wrist, licked and bit. The warm fuzzies grew warmer and my mind became a little unfocused. I smiled up at the movie and drifted away in the clouds. When I was really lost, I licked away and let her wrist go. Cass had already released mine. I snuggled into the blankets and enjoyed the warm afterglow until Kris bellowed that breakfast was ready and to get our asses to the table.
In a room by the stairs sat an enormous dining table with platters of food lined down the middle. Everyone grabbed seats that seemed to be “theirs” so I waited to see where I fit. Bridge and Cass came in last and grabbed me, planting me in a seat between them.
“Do not be polite,” Bridge explained, “or you will starve. Family meals are survival of the fittest.”
Breakfast was chaos of the best kind. Dishes were passed around with someone occasionally lunging for the last croissant or piece of bacon. Bethany sat at the head of the table smiling and sipping coffee while Vic and Bo loudly fought over football predictions, Leena, Gigi, and Aethel gossiped about someone I didn’t know, and everyone else jumped in and out of other conversations.
I mostly ate quietly and listened. It was fascinating to see them all together, happy even when teasing or disagreeing. Half were in pajamas; half were dressed for the day.
“How did it go?” Dray asked as he passed by on his way for a coffee refill.
“You explained it perfectly. I felt high, actually. Warm and fuzzy just like you said.”
“Good. Gigi said you were able to access the Plane this morning. Are you okay?”
I was actually really glad I went right from freaking out about that to the couch where all my worries disappeared. It gave me time to get some distance and process it all. “I am. It was a shock but I’m processing it.”
“Good. Your lessons today will help too.” Then he patted my shoulder and walked away, leaving me wishing he’d sit down and kiss me for the rest of the day.
But knowing that was not going to happen, I finished my breakfast and let Gigi take me to the library. It had been transformed into a makeshift classroom. A chalkboard was rolled in and stood off to the side. A large globe I didn’t remember was front and center, piles of books were stacked on a table, along with charts, maps, and some of the armor I saw from the secret basement.
“I hope you’re ready for samhain bootcamp. You have nine lecturers lined up, each with something different to teach you or show you. Buckle up buttercup, because here we go!”