Psycho Gods: Enemies to Lovers Romance

COMPROMISES

Metanoia (noun): a transformative change of heart.

DAY 30: HOUR 15

Malum bellowed like a wounded animal and whirled.

He slammed his fist into the concrete bathroom wall. “You’ve been in pain every single fucking time you’ve been turned on. Do you understand how messed up that is? All three of us touched you in the changing room!” He screamed as he punched, then his voice dropped and he whispered brokenly, “We never should have touched you. You made a pained noise, and we didn’t realize.”

He gasped like he was holding back a sob.

Scarlet flames filled the bathroom with suffocating smoke.

Ice formed on my fingertips. Hot water melted it away. My clothes hung off me, soaking wet and dirty from the battle.

Grime pooled at my feet before it washed down the drain.

I didn’t regret not telling the men, but I regretted that this was what we’d come to—spiraling in a tiny bathroom.

Six large bodies crammed into a space built for two. Max.

Everyone was squished together.

Slumped over on the edge of the tub, bumping into everyone, Scorpius pulled at his hair dejectedly.

Water sprayed off me and onto him. His pale skin was speckled with pink.

He looked ill.

Orion staggered and collapsed down onto the toilet seat. With his legs intertwined with Scorpius, he hyperventilated. Malum kept driving his fists punishingly through the concrete.

The kings were a mess.

The twins weren’t much better.

John and Luka stood on either side of me in the shower. Our sopping-wet bodies were pressed flushed against one another, and tremors rocked through all three of us. Scorpius’s back leaned against our legs.

I didn’t know which one of us was shaking.

Perhaps we all were.

The room spun in a blur of water, fire, and rage.

I turned my head to the side and came face-to-face with angry, dark eyes. Dimples framed a frowning mouth.

John reached out and enveloped me in a punishing hug. His arms trembled as he whispered something I couldn’t understand against the side of my neck.

Someone else’s hands turned me around, so my back was flush to John’s front.

I blinked through the hot water.

Luka grabbed my chin and tipped my face up. He spoke slowly like the words themselves were painful in his mouth. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

He waited for my response.

My brain had liquefied, and my thoughts were static. I tried to move my lips, but they were numb. My tongue was heavy. Dead.

Luka pulled my fingers away from my mouth, and it took me a second to realize I’d been picking at my lip.

The bathroom fell eerily quiet. The only sound was running water and heavy breathing as all the men went still and waited for my response.

Luka’s grip on my chin tightened. “Answer me, Arabella. Why didn’t you tell us?”

John spoke. “Lately—through our new bond—I’ve been feeling agony streak down my back at the strangest moments. I had no idea where it was coming from—that was you feeling attraction…wasn’t it?”

I shrugged.

John’s arms tightened around me. Luka’s fingers spasmed. A crown of shadows protruded off both their curls.

They looked equal parts terrified and terrifying.

“She shrugged,” Orion whispered loudly.

Scorpius let out an unholy sound, and he slammed his fists down onto the bathroom sink.

It cracked.

The silence fractured.

“I didn’t want you guys to worry,” I said with honesty.

Luka’s eyes narrowed into slits.

Malum whipped his head in my direction, and scarlet flames shot from his mouth. “Why wouldn’t you tell me? I kissed you. Touched you.” His voice cracked. “I hurt you.”

The temperature increased.

“It wasn’t too painful,” I said reassuringly. “I promise.”

“She’s lying,” John whispered. “I felt it—it was agonizing.”

“No. It wasn’t that bad,” I repeated desperately.

Malum’s expression was distraught. He looked devastated.

Luka’s fingers tightened on my chin as he brought his face forward, lips inches from mine. A shadowy cloak hung off his shoulders, and I could taste his minty breath like it was my own.

He whispered, “What chthonic spirit possessed you? Why would you ever let us fuck you without telling us about this?”

“It wasn’t a big deal,” I said. “That’s why I got so drunk. It never hurt.”

I needed them to understand.

His eyes widened, and his hand dropped from my face. He slammed back against the tile, gripping his chest like he’d been shot.

Malum shouted something vulgar. Orion gagged. Scorpius pounded his fist against the broken sink.

Luka spun around, punched the shower wall, and screamed.

Tile shattered.

John held me. “Please, never again,” he pleaded. “Please never pull this shit again, or so help me sun god, it won’t just be the kings committing crimes against the realms.” He pressed a soft kiss against the side of my neck, the heat from his skin warm against my chilled flesh.

Pain streaked down my back, and I winced.

John let out a string of colorful expletives. “Sorry.” He gritted his teeth. “I shouldn’t have done that. Shit.”

He hyperventilated and pulled away.

I turned around, shoulders banging against Luka in the small space, as I hugged John with all my strength. “Don’t release me right now,” I said. “Please.”

John’s arms came back around my sopping-wet clothes.

We held each other.

The rest of the men kept screaming and punching, my secrets detonating like bombs, as they destroyed the bathroom.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” John whispered brokenly against my hair, and I heard the unspoken question in his voice.

He was the person I told things to. He was my friend when the other men were my enemies.

It was different between us.

I inhaled his familiar sandalwood scent. “Because I didn’t want mother to take sex away from me too. I wanted to be with you in every way. No matter the circumstances. If you knew, you wouldn’t have touched me.”

John made a wounded sound.

“I need your touch,” I admitted.

His shaking fingers tangled in my wet curls.

Memories of him taking me in the field in the Legionnaire Games played through my head on repeat.

I swayed, but he held me up.

“No more,” John begged, lips pressed against my head. “Please—no more secrets. I don’t think I can survive it.”

I felt nauseous.

I inhaled courage and blurted out, “I-think-you’re-in-pain-because-I don’t-have-a-soul.” Water sprayed off my frozen lips.

He didn’t rear back like I expected.

John squeezed me tighter and whispered, “That’s bullshit—you’re wrong. If you were missing a soul, there would be no bond to form.”

I pulled back to put some space between us, which put me flush against Luka, who rubbed his hands up and down over my arms like he was trying to warm me.

The Necklace of Death pulsed against my chest.

I reached my hand up under my sweatshirt and held it; the stone was warm and vibrating like it was alive.

John’s eyes widened as he stared at where I gripped the necklace under my clothes.

I said quietly, “I need to take the jewelry off so you both can stop hurting.”

Luka stopped rubbing my arms comfortingly. His hands stilled, and he gripped my biceps tightly.

John shook his head. “It has already completed the bond. Taking it off will do nothing.” He moved closer.

My back was flush against Luka.

I was pinned between the twins.

Luka whispered in my ear, “The jewelry is a symbol of our love for you. Now that we’ve bonded, it’s connected us, body and soul. We’re your husbands, and you’re our wife.” His voice strummed with possessiveness, then the inflection changed and he begged, “Please don’t take it off.”

John trembled like he was freaking out.

“But it’s hurting you both?”

“You think we care about a little pain?” Luka asked in disbelief.

“That’s exactly how I felt,” I countered.

He frowned.

John tangled both his hands in my hair and said, “We’d walk through hell for you. This pain is nothing to us. What matters is your pain. You’re our wife. It’s our duty to protect you, and we’ve failed.”

“You don’t need to protect me,” I said. “I can protect myself.”

That was the part the men kept forgetting.

John’s eyes filled with sadness as he twirled a wet curl. “We don’t need to love you, but we do. We know you can protect yourself, but you shouldn’t have to—please don’t keep secrets.”

I dropped the necklace. Feeling pathetic, I admitted, “I don’t want to take it off.”

It vibrated warmly against my chest, a comforting reminder that they cared.

I wasn’t alone.

Not anymore.

The twins exhaled loudly with relief.

Malum turned off the shower, and I was startled as I realized the kings had moved. The three of them were crowding around the edge of the tub.

Five sets of eyes stared at me like they were trying to see into my soul and uncover any secrets I might have.

There was a loud crash, and the twins shifted to shield me with their bodies. The kings whirled and crouched in unison, a shield of muscles and aggression.

I stood on my tiptoes to look over John’s shoulder.

Malum flung fire through the bathroom.

The door, which was already half hanging off its hinges because of Malum, was thrown open.

The demons dodged the ball of flames.

The men relaxed.

Vegar’s eyes widened as he took in the ruined bathroom, and Zenith blinked in shock behind him.

The demon’s mouths opened and closed as they took in the scene.

Vegar pointed at me. “You’re an idiot.” He shook his head like he was disappointed.

“Wow,” I said, “Blame the only woman for the men’s destruction.”

Vegar flung his hands in the air, inky lines trailing down his face. “They’re fucking idiots—their bullshit is expected.” He waved dismissively at the men, then pointed again at me. “But I thought you were better than them. You’re supposed to be beyond this display of stupidness.”

I glared back at him. I totally respected holding women to a higher standard (because we were better than men in every way), but this was taking it too far.

“But I did nothing,” I deadpanned.

Vegar rolled his eyes. “Control them.” Zenith winked at me.

I choked. “They’re not my dogs?”

“Are you sure about that?” Vegar asked in a disbelieving tone, like he thought I was an idiot.

“We did pledge to serve as your hounds,” Orion whispered. Scorpius and Malum nodded in agreement.

John covered his laughter with a cough, and Luka slung his arm around my shoulder.

I had no words.

The demons shook their heads and walked away. Vegar called over his shoulder, “We’re going to have to give a battle report tomorrow and deal with soldier losses. Stop with the bullshit.”

“We’re done,” Malum said with exasperation, like it was obvious his meltdown had concluded.

Personally, that was not obvious to me, but what did I know?

I slumped against the twins and asked, “Can we sleep together tonight?”

John went still against me. “I thought we covered this?” his voice brimmed with concern.

It took me a moment to realize what he was insinuating. “Not like that,” I groaned. “I can barely keep my eyes open.”

He brushed wet hair behind my ears. “Sure, you can sleep on me tonight. Luka gets the floor.”

Luka stiffened but didn’t argue.

John lifted me over the mangled side of the tub—concrete had fallen from the ceiling and crushed part of it—and he escorted me out of the ruined bathroom.

Malum blocked the door. He cleared his throat, and his cheeks turned bright pink. “Actually, could all of us sleep—together?”

I blinked, unsure if I’d entered an alternative dimension.

“You three want to sleep with me and the twins?” I asked. “Tonight?”

“Personally, I want to fuck you and John,” Scorpius said boldly. “At the same time. Preferably, while I choke the living daylights out of you both.”

Everyone gaped at him.

“Ignore him,” Orion mouthed. “We just want to sleep.” He peeked at Luka shyly.

Malum rubbed the back of his neck and said, “We need the physical contact, especially after the battle, and—everything we’ve learned.”

He continued, “Since we know the twins are now your husbands”—he gasped like he was choking—“we want to show you we are…willing to compromise.”

“How would we fit?” I asked.

Malum looked chagrined. “I have an idea.”

An hour later, I stared at the ceiling. John clung to my left side, and Luka was reaching across him to play with my hair. Orion’s arm was flung over me from the right side. He was lying next to Scorpius, and both of them were lying on top of Malum.

We were a pile of bodies.

The kings had pulled all our mattresses off the bunks and pushed them together in the middle of the room to make a superbed.

The five of us were buried under a mountain of blankets.

I shivered, and the men shifted around me.

Someone mumbled something, then an arm pressed against my right side. It radiated warmth. I sighed with relief as my toes curled with delight.

“Go to sleep,” Malum whispered underneath his mates.

I yawned, “G’night.”

John whispered something I couldn’t hear and pressed a soft kiss against my cheek. I smiled.

As sleep claimed me, my smile dropped away.

The nightmares came quickly.

Mother sliced an enchanted knife through my back while I screamed. This time, guards had to hold me down because I was fighting for my life. Begging. Pleading. Another guard joined the four restraining me.

But for the first time, I recognized it wasn’t real.

That time in my life was over.

My present was filled with something I’d never had growing up: love.