P.S. I Still Love You: Chapter 15
EARLY MORNING BEFORE SCHOOL, JOSH is chiseling ice off his windshield when I run out to my car. Daddy’s already scraped the ice off mine and started the engine and turned on the heat. By the looks of Josh’s car, he’s not going to make it to school on time.
We’ve hardly seen Josh since Christmas; after all the strangeness with me and then the breakup with Margot, he’s been a ghost in this house. He leaves a little earlier for school now, comes home a little later. He never reached out to me when all the video stuff happened either, though part of me was relieved for that. I didn’t want to hear I told you so from Josh about how he was right about Peter.
I back out my driveway, and at the last second I open the window and lean toward it. “Do you want a ride?” I call out to Josh.
His eyes widen in surprise. “Yeah. Sure.” He throws his ice scraper into his car and grabs his backpack, then comes running over. Climbing in, he says, “Thanks, Lara Jean.” He warms his hands on the heating vents.
We make our way out of the neighborhood, and I’m driving carefully, because the roads are icy from the night before.
“You’ve gotten really good at driving,” Josh says.
“Thanks.” I have been practicing, on my own and with Peter. I still get nervous sometimes, but each time I get in the car and drive, it’s a little bit less, because now I know I can do it. You only know you can do something if you keep on doing it.
We’re a few minutes from school when Josh asks, “When are we going to talk again? Just tell me so I have a general idea.”
“We’re talking right now, aren’t we?”
“You know what I mean. What happened with me and Margot was between us—can’t you and I still be friends like we were before?”
“Josh, of course we’ll still be friends. But you and Margot have been broken up less than a month.”
“No, we broke up in August. She decided she wanted to get back together three weeks ago, and I said no.”
I sigh. “Why did you say no, though? Was it just the distance?”
Josh sighs too. “Relationships are hard work. You’ll see. After you’ve been in it with Kavinsky longer, you’ll see what I’m talking about.”
“Oh my God, you’re such a know-it-all. The biggest know-it-all I ever met, besides my sister.”
“Which one?”
I can feel a giggle bubbling up inside of me, which I push down. “Both. They’re both know-it-alls.”
“One more thing.” He hesitates, then keeps going. “I was wrong about Kavinsky. The way he’s handled this whole video thing, I can tell he’s a good guy.”
“Thanks, Joshy. He really is.”
He nods, and there is a comfortable quiet between us, and I’m glad for the bad weather we had last night, glad for the ice on his windshield this morning.