Nightmares and Daydreams (The Blood Falls Book 4)

I sat by the fire wrapped in an enormous fluffy blanket drinking a cup of hot cocoa. Dray sat on the porch with Bo and Kris while they shared a new bourbon Bo was gifted by the Nala. They had a distillery on the Blood River where they made whiskey and another in Kentucky for their bourbon. At least that’s what I remembered from Bo’s babbling. I should know this stuff. I was half Nala, after all. One day I would finally get all this stuff straight.

I stayed inside because I was moody. Also because Dray could really use some time with his brothers after everything that happened. He wasn’t physically drained the way he normally was after time as the dragon, but he was mentally wiped. Plus it was good for him to share some of that grief with the brothers who understood it best.

I was elated that Dray had such a major breakthrough but as the dust settled my mood shifted from happy to something darker. Not sad. Not angry. Something else I couldn’t quite put my finger on.

The door cracked open and Rain stuck her head inside. “Mind if I join you? I will be silent if you don’t want to talk.”

She meant it too. Rain spent most of her life hiding away from everyone because their thoughts would overwhelm her psychic abilities. If anyone could leave me alone while being in the room it was her.

But I wasn’t that moody. “Come in. There’s hot chocolate on the stove if you’d like some.” One of my foster moms liked to make hot cocoa at night. She warmed milk on the stove and mixed in the sugar and chocolate, sprinkling in some cinnamon, nutmeg, and vanilla. It was a good memory and for some reason it was the first thing I wanted to do when we got home.

Rain groaned. “This is so good. When the Heida bring down the maple syrup we should make another batch. Their syrup is always the best.”

“I’ve never made it with syrup.” I wasn’t so sure what I thought about that.

“Trust me,” Rain took the chair opposite mine and pulled a fuzzy blanket around her legs, “it’s so rich and flavorful. So good. We have pancakes, French toast, and maple flavored everything for a solid month when the shipment comes down. Then everyone gets sick of it and doesn’t touch it for another month. Then we come to our senses and use a reasonable amount until it runs out.”

“That sounds nice.” I could see Gigi and the twins in the kitchen cooking up a storm.

“You and Gigi are soulmates,” Rain said out of the blue.

“Excuse me?”

She shook herself and smiled. “Sorry. I can’t help it when a psychic wave that strong hits me. I can’t pretend I don’t feel it. You thought of her and the psychic vibration changed.”

“You know a lot of humans believe you can only have one soulmate.”

Rain snorted into her cup before taking another sip of cocoa. “Humans are so weird. They love dichotomy. Black and white. Up and down. Good and evil. Of course they think there are two halves to a soul.”

Maybe I should have put some of that Nala bourbon in my cocoa. “What do the samhain believe?”

She took a second to find the right words. “You know how love isn’t finite? There’s an endless supply of it, right? The more you love, the more love you can give and take. Like when someone has a child. They love it completely. But that doesn’t mean they’ve used up all their love. When they have another, they love that one just as much. And so on.”

I still struggled with that concept. I didn’t exactly grow up around much love but having experienced the love my biological parents felt for each other and how my mother’s love continued to impact my life, I had a bit of an understanding. “So you’re saying there’s no limit on soulmates? I could have ten of them?” That sounded wonderful and exhausting at the same time.

Rain cocked her head to the side and thought. “Well, yes. And you might have ten at once, or ten over the course of your life. Or just one.” She shrugged. “It’s about vibration. You and Gigi have the same one.”

“What about Dray? Do we vibrate the same?”

She shook her head vigorously. “Oh no. Not at all. You have complimentary vibrations. Explosively so. Plus you’re Fated. That’s a whole other kind of bond.”

“Bonds seem important to the samhain.”

Her eyes rounded. “It’s the foundation of who we are. We literally can’t survive without our bonds. Sharing blood is crucial, but it’s the bonds that sustain us, give us the power to survive. Oh Rhysa, I forget how new you are to all of this.”

I shrugged away the tinge of embarrassment I felt each time someone pointed it out. “I’m told that Destiny planned it that way. I can only hope it will help in the end.”

“It will. I know everything seems dark and hopeless now that we can’t count on the future, but Destiny planned for this moment. It gave us the tools we’ll need to survive this.”

“You really believe that?” Between her abilities and the time she spent with the archives, Rain was probably the most reliable source of wisdom.

“I do,” she said with pure confidence. “Seeing you and Dray together for the first time, seeing how Destiny brought you so perfectly together, I knew then and there that we would get through this.”

The same twinge of moodiness I felt when we got home hit me again. “Why? I’m so young and so uneducated about the ways of the Plane. I feel completely out of my depth most of the time. What is it you see that gives you such confidence?”

She set her cup aside and sat forward. “Something’s changed. Something important. What is it?”

Of course Rain could sense it. “Dray made huge progress today. He’s learning to accept his dragon half.”

Her eyes narrowed like she was reading my mind. She probably was. “You’ve been focused on finishing school and helping Dray. You’re overwhelmed by everything samhain—which is totally understandable, by the way—and this change in Dray means a new focus. Rhysa, take a breath. It’s all going to be okay. You’ve got this.”

Rain was a damned magnifying glass. She took my jumble of feelings and went right to the source. Something that probably would have taken me days. Or weeks. “Another new thing. Another responsibility. I’m scared.” Here I spent all this time getting Dray to face his fears and I walked right into my own without even realizing it.

“You know I understand more than just about anyone else on the planet what you’re feeling right now. The power. The responsibility. The exhaustion.”

“And yet you look like you’re doing just fine.” I waved at her perfect braid.

She shot me a look. “A few weeks ago I was the opposite of fine.”

“What changed?”

“Kris. Fate. Destiny.” She shrugged. “A Fated Mate is a powerful bond. So powerful it can’t be broken by anyone or anything. Your destiny and Dray’s are one. Together you make such a complete, powerful combination I’m not sure we’ve ever seen anything like it. Not since the Dark Times.”

I’d heard all those words before, but they were just words. What did they mean?

“Oh,” Rain said softly. “I see. Okay. So you understand soulmates. And you understand vibrations, yes?”

“Yeah. I got it. It makes sense.”

“But Fated Mates still confuses you.”

“It seems like they should be the same thing, you know?”

She shook her head. “Oh, they’re so different. Importantly different. A soulmate is all about bonding with others who are the same as you. How deep that love grows and what it means will depend entirely on the individuals and time. But Fated Mates are bound by Destiny. One is quite literally made to complement the other. You were made by Destiny to love each other.”

“But…why?”

She smiled so brightly it lit up her eyes. “Love is the most powerful bond there is. Nothing is stronger. No energy exists that can top it. And the bond of lovers is primal. It’s written into our bodies. That combination of these kinds of love gives us incredible power and enhances our gifts. You and Dray were made to love each other just as Kris and I were. When I finally gave into the Fates, I was able to accept my Destiny.”

“You mean making Kris your Shield?” Things began to slot into place in my brain and the anxiety that had been holding me hostage all evening began to abate.

“Not exactly. I mean accepting that Kris is uniquely built to be my perfect mate. His gifts compliment mine. I could have a different Shield but they wouldn’t be as powerful as Kris. And you, you’ve spent all this time helping Dray become whole. Now he finally is and that means your role, your Destiny, will finally come to light. Let Dray help you as you helped him. It’s what we’re made to do.”

“Ladies,” Dray’s voice was low but it still vibrated off the walls as he walked inside. “I think Rhysa and I need to get to bed. We’ve had a big day.”

Kris followed his brother inside, moving to take Rain’s hand. “Bo’s already gone.”

“Then we should get to bed, too.” She grinned up at him. “Good night and congratulations.”

They disappeared, leaving me alone with an intense Dray. His eyes bored right through me. “What were you two talking about?”

“Life,” I said simply. He didn’t need all the messy details.

“It made you upset.”

“Not really. I was emotional.”

He bared his teeth. “I don’t like feeling you so…emotional.” He moved closer and folded me into his arms. “We’re tired. We need sleep.”

We walked through our evening routine on autopilot. Dray pulled the curtains in our bedroom that he normally left open so we could see the stars. “If we need extra sleep I don’t want the sun to wake us,” he explained as he crawled into bed and pulled me into his chest. “Big day.”

“Huge.” I felt the exhaustion in my bones.

“You’re scared. How is that possible? You stood beside a dragon today without any fear at all.”

I snuggled into his warm skin. “That’s because I knew what I was doing. You don’t scare me Draygus Wren. You love me.”

His arms tightened and I felt his worry double. “But now you don’t know what you’re doing?”

The cold sliver of doubt wiggled its way down my spine. “No.”

“You will. I know you will.”

“How can you know that?”

He laughed a little. “How did you have so much confidence in me earlier? I suspect it comes from the same place. Drink from me. It will help you settle.”

His words were like a command I couldn’t refuse. My body reacted before I processed it all. And then I slowly sank into his vein, pulling his strong, rich blood into my mouth. Dray groaned and swore, holding me tight against him until I drifted off into a deep sleep.