FULL NOVELXO Chapter 35
My belly is a tangle of painful knots as I pace the small dining area. Even though I’ve been expecting the knock, the sound of it is enough to startle me.
I just want to get this over with.
With a swipe of my palms against my jeans, I force myself to answer the door. I swing it open and find Axel waiting on the other side. He’s dressed similarly as to when I caught sight of him in Vegas. Like he’s ready to hit the club. Lavender dress shirt unbuttoned midway down his chest and black pants. A black leather jacket is draped over his shoulders and his favorite crocodile loafers complete the look. I’m sure his stylist threw this together before he took off.
“Hi. Thanks for coming over.”
“Well, it’s not like I was going to head back to LA without talking to you. I didn’t fly out here to be ignored, B.”
Already I can see how this conversation will go.
He brushes past me before I can invite him inside and drops down on the couch as if he owns the place. A bored expression settles on his face as his gaze roves over the interior.
“So…this is where you’ve been hiding yourself all these months, huh?” His upper lip curls. “I figured you’d be in Costa Rica or Paris. Maybe a spa in the Sonoran Desert.” He waves a manicured hand around the space. “Not some shithole college town.”
I should thank him for reminding me of who he really is when he’s not putting on a show and trying to dazzle the audience. It’ll make this convo much easier.
I gravitate to the armchair across from him and attempt to appear just as nonchalant about the situation as he is. “Sorry to disappoint.”
He shrugs as if he doesn’t care one way or the other. “Look, dude. You can do whatever the hell you want. But I draw the line when it affects me or my career. And right now, your bullshit is spilling over.”
I can only blink.
Whatever I was expecting him to say, that wasn’t it.
He straightens before leaning forward. His steely gaze stays pinned to mine. “You’ve spent more than enough months slumming it, trying to find yourself. And we’ve all been patient. Now it’s time to pack up and return to reality.” He jerks a brow. “You remember what that is, right? It’s the show that pays our bills.”
My mouth turns bone dry as I force out the one question that has been gnawing at me for years. “And what if that’s no longer what I want?”
For the first time since waltzing into the apartment, genuine humor lights up his handsome face. “Give me a break, B.” He throws his arms wide. “Take a good look around. This is what you want? This…ordinariness?”
He spits the last word out as if it’s a dirty one.
I glance around the apartment. All the little touches I’ve added over the months have turned it into a home. Maybe it’s less than seven hundred square feet in size, but it’s become a refuge.
I can pick up my guitar from the corner any time I want and work on a song. I can do it because something I haven’t felt in years now hums through my veins.
Creativity.
A genuine need to put pencil to paper and jot down lyrics and musical notes.
What can’t be denied is that my tiny apartment is vastly different from the eight thousand square foot luxury rental Mom found in the Hollywood Hills, where we film practically twenty-four seven. I can barely escape to the bathroom without cameras attempting to follow me in.
A shiver of dread snakes down my spine at the thought of returning to that life again.
I don’t want to leave the friends I’ve made. Juliette, Carina, Stella, Viola, and Fallyn have all been so welcoming and friendly. And then there’s Ava. She’s someone I’m still getting to know. But I think, with enough time, we could be close.
None of these girls are anything like the ones I’ve met in LA.
They don’t smile at my face before stabbing me in the back the second I turn away. They don’t talk shit and try to tear me down because their careers haven’t taken off the way mine did.
“Yeah, I do.”
His pale blue eyes spark with anger as his thinly veiled pretense falls away. “Well, that’s too bad. You don’t get a choice in the matter. So, do me a favor and go pack your shit.” He waves toward the bedroom before glancing at the silver Rolex wrapped around his left wrist. “I want to be on our way to the airport in an hour.”
My heart accelerates as I fold my arms over my chest. “No. I’m not leaving.”
His expression hardens. “Excuse me?”
“I said that I’m not leaving. I enrolled in classes for the semester, and it’s important that I finish them.” With a gulp, I attempt to steady my nerves. “If my parents and siblings want to continue the show, they can do it without me. I’m done.”
I’m ready for a change.
Even if the people in my life aren’t.
“We both know your fucking family can’t hold that show together,” he says with a snort.
“Cheyenne can sing and act. She could easily slide into my place.” And she’d be thrilled to do it. Over the years, my sister has grown resentful that she’s always stuck in second place. Relegated to the shadows. It can’t be denied that in my absence, she’s flourished.
Axel rolls his eyes. “The only thing she’s got going for her is a great set of tits.”
I spring to my feet and realize that I’m shaking from head to toe. “It’s time for you to leave.”
He rises before taking a menacing step in my direction. “The only way that’s happening is if you’re with me.”
When he stalks closer, a flurry of nerves explodes at the bottom of my belly.
“Here’s the thing, Bebe—I don’t care if I have to drag you out by your hair. We’re boarding that plane and getting the fuck out of here. You’ve lost your damn mind if you think I’m going to lose my career because some ungrateful bitch no longer wants the fame and fortune I helped build.”
“You didn’t build anything.” With a shake of my head, I point at my chest. “I did.”
Air gets clogged in my lungs when he grits his teeth, the muscle in his jaw ticking as he lunges.
“You touch one goddamn hair on her head, and I’ll bury you.”
On shaky legs, I swing toward Colby as relief bubbles up inside me.
Axel glares at the muscular hockey player. “I don’t know how you got in here, but do us all a favor and show yourself out. This conversation doesn’t concern you, asshole.”
Colby eats up the distance between us with a handful of long-legged strides before snaking his arm around my waist and hauling me close. The woodsy scent of his cologne does the impossible and calms everything raging inside me.
That’s all it takes for my knees to weaken as I lean into his comforting strength.
“Actually, that’s where you’re wrong. Britt is my wife. Anything that concerns her is my business.”
Axel’s narrowed gaze slices to me. Only now do I see the hatred burning in his pale blue depths. On some level, I’ve always sensed his true feelings. Only now does it occur to me that by breaking off our pseudo-relationship, I’ve dodged a major bullet.
He never gave a damn.
It was always about the show.
“Are you really going to throw away everything we’ve built over the years for a nobody?”
My gaze locks on Colby’s. “This man could never be a nobody. He’s my husband.” I pause for a heartbeat. “And I love him.”
His arm tightens, pressing me closer.
I straighten to my full height. It would be so easy to hide behind Colby and allow him to fight this battle, but this is something I need to take care of myself.
It’s important that I end it here and now.
“We don’t have anything further to discuss. As far as I’m concerned, there’s no reason for us to ever talk again. You need to leave.”
He stabs a finger in my direction. “I’ll make sure you regret this decision. Do you hear me?” His voice escalates with every word as spittle flies from his mouth. “You’ll never work again. Your pathetic excuse for a career is over!”
Fear pools in the pit of my belly before I quash it. As much as Axel wishes he had the power that comes with those kinds of threats, he doesn’t.
“Get out.”
When he doesn’t budge, Colby growls, “You heard my wife. Get the fuck out of our apartment and don’t come back.”
Color rides high on Axel’s sharp cheekbones. Even though it’s obvious he wants to argue, he stalks from the living area and into the entryway before slamming the door shut behind him. The thick wood reverberates on its hinges as a deafening silence falls over us.
Colby’s hands settle on my shoulders before he turns me until we’re facing each other.
“Are you all right?” His brows pinch together as he examines my face. “Did he hurt you?”
“No, he never touched me.”
But he would have.
He would have used brute force had it become necessary. I could see it in his eyes and hear the threat of violence filling his voice.
A shiver scampers down my spine as I release a shaky breath.
I’ve known Axel for years and have seen him lose his shit on producers and other people deemed beneath him, but his ire has never been directed at me because I always played my part and did what I was supposed to.
Until now.
Colby tugs me against his chest until my senses are inundated with his scent. It’s enough to calm everything that vibrates within.
Even though it’s the last thing I want to do, I pull away enough to meet his steady gaze. “How did you get in here?”
He fishes a small metal object from the pocket of his jeans. “I still have my key.”
Emotion swells in my throat. “Did you come back to return it?”
He searches my eyes for a long, painful heartbeat. One that has my nerves stretching so taut that it feels as if they’ll snap.
“No, I came back because I wanted to talk. I told you yesterday that I needed some time and space to deal with everything that happened.”
I release a steady stream of air from my lungs, relieved that he’s willing to hear me out.
Unable to resist touching him, my hand rises to cup his shadowed cheek. “I’m so sorry. I should have been honest about who I was. Maybe it’s not something I could have done right away in the beginning, but I should have done it sooner so you could deal with it without the world finding out at the same time.”
“I wish it could have happened differently as well. After putting myself in your shoes, I understand why you held back.” His voice dips. “And I don’t blame you for it.”
Shock spirals through me. “You don’t?”
“No.”
When he doesn’t continue, I force myself to ask the one question that has been weighing heaviest on me. It’s the answer I’m most afraid of but need to hear.
“What happens now?”
“I guess that depends.” He searches my eyes as if it’s possible to inspect my innermost thoughts. “Do you want a divorce? I know you never wanted this marriage.”
A thick lump settles in my throat, making it impossible to swallow. Out of everything I’ve done in my life, this by far is the scariest.
My entire future feels as if it’s at stake.
“I want to see if we can make this work.” I gulp down my nerves and force out the truth. “I want you.”
Instead of responding, he asks, “Did you really mean it when you said that you loved me?”
I lean onto the tips of my toes and press my lips against his. “I’ve never meant anything more.”
His arms snake around my body as he hauls me closer. “I love you too and can’t imagine my life without you filling it.”
“Good.” I nip his bottom lip, tugging at the plump flesh before releasing it with a soft pop. “I hope that means you’ll move back in.”
“Baby, wild horses couldn’t keep me away.”
With that, he sweeps me into his arms and carries me into the bedroom.