Book 24: Final: Chapter: Afterlife
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And then, by the time I realized, I was already in the white room.
“Yo.”
“Hey.”
The mosaic guy that lived here looked healthy as usual.
Of course, he was neither sealed nor was he feeling down.
It’s the same-as-usual mosaic.
“Does that mean that what I saw 40 years ago was because of the power of foresight?”
“Yep.”
Hitogami was the same as usual.
Still, 40-50 years had passed since the last time I saw him.
Therefore, my memory of his 『Usual』 was already distant.
The only thing I did remember was his impudent attitude the first time I met him.
“I thought that if I showed you that, then you would become a little lax.”
“Well, it missed the target by quite a bit.”
“Not really, I was just trying something.”
A dream like that wasn’t going to stop me from doing what I’d been doing until now. I wasn’t that weak-willed.
Well, if it didn’t turn out like that dream, the possibility that I would stop wasn’t completely non-existent.
“So anyway, you actually looked like that.”
When told that, I looked at my own figure.
Before I knew it, my figure had changed.
The body with a blubber of mass......was no longer there.
My body had changed into the one that I had become familiar with in this world.
It was the body of Rudeus Greyrat.
I couldn’t see my own face so I couldn’t tell exactly, but I felt that I wasn’t that old right now.
“You didn’t know?”
“Yeah. Cause my eyes can only see the soul directly. I knew that your body and your soul were different, but this is my first time seeing your actual form.”
Well that’s a first.
But, now that I think very carefully, I don’t know how Hitogami looks either.
We’re in the same boat.
But why, why did my body decide to take this shape now of all times?
........I assume there’s no explanation for it.
“At any rate, with this, it’s over for you.”
“.........Yeah.”
I died.
At the age of 74.
I remember that my final moments were comfy.
I think that it was a happy ending for me, surrounded by my children and grand-children in my final moments.
At the very least, there was a world of difference compared to my previous final moments.
As compared to that lonely, powerless, miserable one, which would make you want to cry.........
“Now that you're gone, I can move more freely.”
“I see.”
“As long as you lived, anything I did resulted in failure.
That’s why, I’ve thought of something.
Just like you, I was increasing my supporters little by little.”
“So you still haven’t given up, huh.”
When I said that, Hitogami’s attitude changed.
He seemed angry.
“Isn’t that obvious?
Would you give up knowing that your future is like that?
Forever alone, not being able to do anything, not being able to see anything.
On top of that, I have to live like that for 10,000 or 100,000 years or even more.
Even though I know that I won’t be able to bear it, why would I give up?”
Well, I guess.
If it was that grand, then I couldn’t even imagine it........
But I could understand a little bit.
What would happen to him if he didn’t do anything.
Just what kind of future awaited him.
If he knew that he would regret it, then he couldn’t just pass up his time without doing anything.
“Well, I would probably not give up.......”
“........What’s with that carefree face of yours? Do you think you’ve won?”
“Do you have a plan?”
“Yeah, I now know about Orsted’s 200 years time loop.
You’ve finished producing your descendents as well, and I’ve thought of a way to manipulate them.
I’ve prepared things during these last 50 years........”
“I see.”
“Can you understand what I’m trying to say?
That foundation that you’ve established so far, I’m going to knock it over and turn the tables on you.
In a world without you, by using the things you laid out, I will win.
You cannot do anything now. Because you’re already dead!
You can no longer stop your own descendents from fighting among themselves. You can’t stop them from killing each other.
You can’t even cry and beg me to stop.
On the contrary, the only thing you can do is watch!”
As compared to Hitogami who was delightfully talking, I was just scratching my cheeks.
Incidentally, I also scratched at the back of my head.
It’s not really itchy though.
I’m just perplexed as to what kind of answer I should give.
“Is that so.....”
Upon my reply, Hitogami stomped his feet on the ground with force.
“WHAT IS IT.......!?”
While restlessly stomping on the ground with his foot, he raised his voice with irritation in it.
“How are you SO RELAXED!?”
“That’s because.......I’m already dead.”
As I answered with a pause, Hitogami became speechless.
I closed my eyes.
I started thinking about the things up until now.
I was able to do what I wanted in this world.
I married and had lots of friends.
I had lots of children and grand-children as well.
I tried my best at work.
Indeed, I was anxious about the things Hitogami would be doing from now on, and I also had the thought that I could’ve done something more.
But for some reason...
I had no regrets or curiosity left.
No, it should be better to say that there was nothing left to regret.
Sure, I’m worried and anxious, but the thought of ‘what to do’ doesn’t come to mind.
After listening to Hitogami now, I didn’t feel like I should somehow revive myself and go protect my children.
The children or the grandchildren would probably be able to do something about it somehow.
I slowly headed towards Hitogami.
Hitogami had a surprisingly small stature.
Since I never approached him more than necessary, I could never estimate his height.
“I’m satisfied already.”
I’d lived my life plenty.
I didn’t think that everything was perfect. Maybe there were still some things left that needed to be done.
It’s not like when I closed my eyes, only good memories came to my mind.
Memories of failures, memories of success, there were both.
However, I didn’t think that I needed to redo it.
I died.
My work was now over with this.
I should just entrust the consequences to the people that were still alive.
Even though the person in front of me was saying that he would harm the ones that were still alive, it was rather strange.
But it couldn’t be helped.
Strangely enough, my mind was calm.
“Listen, Hitogami.”
“...........”
“I wanted to tell you something before.”
“.......What?”
“I think that I don’t really hate you that much.”
I felt like Hitogami had an unpleasant face.
Of course, he might think that I was saying this because I was one step ahead of him for now.
Sylphy and Roxy both lived, and the children were in good health as well.
Eris died first but it was a matter of life-span.
It wasn’t Hitogami’s fault.
Of course, if there was even a little bit of change, then I think that I would’ve hated Hitogami to the point of killing him.
Just like my future self.
Just like him, it’s possible that I would’ve become a machine just to kill Hitogami.
I wouldn’t have been able to obtain such a calm demeanor.
As a result, I became how I am, is what I’m trying to say.
“What are you trying to say......?”
“Even I don’t really understand. I think that, the way I’m this calm right now is thanks to you.
I think if you, who was such a distinct enemy, weren’t here then I wouldn’t have been so satisfied up to this point.”
Yep. That’s right.
If not for Hitogami, I would’ve started to slack after I turned 20.
I would’ve married Sylphy, then gotten a job and would’ve worked hard at it.
I would’ve lived my life like that, been satisfied, and then died.
I’m sure that would’ve happened.
I would’ve been fine if things had turned out that way, but I have no doubt that I would never have been able to attain the same amount of satisfaction that I have now.
Not to the point of having any regrets, but I would’ve probably thought once more or I want to do it over or I need to return.
It was only because there was a distinct enemy, a distinct objective, that I was able to give my best until my death.
As a result, I was now this way.
“Even if you say that, I won’t be letting my guard down.”
“Ah.......no, well.....I didn’t say this with that intention........”
I wonder why.
It’s not like Hitogami has a nice side to him.
Even though I said that I didn’t hate him, it didn’t mean that I liked him either.
Of course, I didn’t want to give him my thanks.
“..........”
“..........”
That’s why, on that note, the conversation came to a stop.
An uncomfortable atmosphere grew between us.
Within that moment, my mind was suddenly hit by a thought.
“........I wonder why I came to this world.”
I tried muttering those words.
“I don’t know.”
Hitogami answered while muttering as well.
“Do you really not know anything?”
“If I knew, I would’ve interfered beforehand. You really appeared out of thin air. I didn't realize until after that teleport incident happened. Just suddenly.”
“Hmmmmm...........”
In the end, during my entire life, I never found out the truth behind the teleport incident.
There was Nanahoshi’s weird hypothesis, and something may happen from this point forward but.......
“If there ever comes a reincarnated guy similar to me, then please give him my regards.”
“.......Like hell I will.”
“Thought so.”
I was bluntly refused.
Well, it wouldn’t be strange if Hitogami was holding a grudge towards me.
“Anyway, what’s going to happen to me now? I do think that I’ve died.”
“Well, let’s see.”
While irritated Hitogami looked at me.
“Ordinarily, the soul reduces itself into mana, then gets mixed with someone else’s mana or recomposes itself into something else. However, you are a person from another world so I wouldn’t know what may happen to you.”
“I see.”
I thought that after death I would get to meet Paul or Gisu but I guess that’s not happening.
Even though it was obvious, it’s still a pity........
But well, my body had been buried in the same place as them. Maybe I should be satisfied with just that.contemporary romance
“.......”
When I noticed, my body was gradually fading away.
I wonder if this was the mana reduction that Hitogami was talking about.
So this was the definition of death in this world.
Perhaps even for other inhabitants of this world, they came to this white room just before their deaths.
Probably without ever meeting Hitogami, they just waited until they faded away from the white room.
If you think that way, then Hitogami may be close to the Yama(the Judge of the Afterlife).
Scoffing on someone’s entire life, grinning in front of them at the verge of their death…..
That’s a detestable Yama.
“Tch.......”
However, Hitogami wasn’t grinning like he usually did.
On the contrary, he was unconsciously tapping his foot, unable to hide his irritation.
He wanted to feel triumphant in front of me who was vexed and disappearing.........but that ended in a failure so now he was feeling irritated.
He really is a detestable guy.
“........”
I stood in front of that Hitogami.
“Well, Perhaps it’s not my position to say this but........”
Someway or other, I put my hand on his shoulder.
“Do your best from now on.”
I wonder if he’ll get angry.........
Or so I thought, but Hitogami breathed out a sigh and dropped his shoulders.
And then, sat down as if collapsing on his knees.
“..............”
After that, he completely fell silent.
While looking down on Hitogami, I surveyed my surroundings.
It’s the same as before, pure white.
Empty.
And then, my body was on the verge of disappearing too.
My consciousness was gradually dying out as well.
Would I return back to my previous world?
Or would I become someone else in this world?
Would my memories remain intact?
Or would they not?
I didn’t know, but no matter which form it takes, I wouldn’t care.
Even if my consciousness or memories remained, even if I was born in place much harsher than this one, or in my previous world, I would probably be able to get along somehow.
“See ya.”
My final words.
As my consciousness was gradually fading away, I passed by Hitogami’s side and started walking forward.
Without turning back, I simply headed forward───
done.co