Chapter 55: Acceptance
Maliha sat in the grass, the blades tickling along her skin as she watched Enzo interact with his aunt. Maliha was glad that they had reached this point in time. A few days ago, she had been doubtful that they would ever be capable of being amicable, let alone spend considerable amounts of time together without saying or doing something hurtful to one another. However, in the few days that had followed Maliha and Jiya’s confrontation and the revealing Jiya’s fearsome Draganir, the two women had formed an unlikely bond. Enzo was their point of understanding and for him, the two had begun to work past their initial disdain. It had been outright hostile between the two at first but Hanan had coaxed Jiya into apologizing for her Draganir’s possessive behaviour over Enzo and Kaori had encouraged his daughter to be less combative towards Jiya, especially a she was a Draganir first and such creatures were temperamental and possessive.
Kaiori and Hanan had been the fundamental pieces in forcing the two women to make amends and to see eye to eye. Hanan was much like her sister, Makula, she carried wisdom in every sentence she spoke. The few conversations Maliha had with Hanan had made Maliha desperately miss her mentor and friend. As the days passed the ache for her small tribe of friends that she had met amongst the Der Surjaz grew stronger and stronger. The two sisters had been separated for more years than Maliha had lived but there were certain characteristics and traits that were identical, Maliha’s mind often tricked her into believing they were one which only enhanced her longing ache for her friends.
As the days had passed since the unravelling of Maliha’s past and Enzo’s heritage, a bond had begun to form amongst the small cohort. Enzo had taken to Makaoi and Kaori in the way he had always taken to men, with awe and wonder. He hung onto their every word and move as they interacted with each other. Absorbing every sentence and action that her father and brother committed. They were truly becoming a family and it warmed Maliha’s heart, especially, when she herself had missed out on this love.
A hand glided across Maliha’s shoulder lovingly as a tribeswoman walked past on her merry way. Maliha smiled at the woman and her child as they continued on their journey.
Maliha had to get used to the touching. In the days after she had come to them, she had slowly been pulled further and further into this tribe and what a tribe it was. They were cold to the outside world but amongst them, there was a strong sense of family that Maliha had felt nowhere else. The bond reminded her of the Der Surjaz, it was reminiscent of them, but it was purer here. The Nah Barros had pulled together when things had become unbearable whereas the Der Surjaz had slowly begun to crumble. It was amazing to sit back and watch how both tribes were so similar and yet so fundamentally different. It was crazy how two tribes that were so akin could despise each other so deeply that two sisters would be separated for years.
A shadow formed bove Maliha’s head, she hastily looked up to see who it was and found a smile spreading across her face at the sight of her brother. His chest was glistening with sweat and was riddled with scars that she had never noticed before.
“Have you been thinking about it?” Makaio panted as he collapsed onto the grass beside her.
“I have been thinking about it,” Maliha murmured shyly as she watched Kaori and Jiya teaching Enzo small defensive moves. As her father moved through each movement, Maliha began to understand why this tribe was revered as having some of the best Warriors. There was a fluidity to each stance, he flowed from one move to another whilst Jiya and Enzo tried their hardest to imitate him. Maliha often found herself laughing as they flittered from one move to another. She felt envious that she could not move with them, but her flu had not disappeared yet. Enzo’s had only lasted two days but Maliha still felt weak and drained.
“Have you made a decision?” Makaio asked, not able to hide his excitement.
Maliha sighed deeply, looking away from the loving scene and facing her brother. He had an eye patch over his green eye whilst his brown eye remained to be seen. Her brother was handsome and loving but there was a sadness in his eyes when he cared to show them both. It was easy to see that Makaoi felt that this ritual would fill the void he had been feeling but Maliha doubted it.
“I think I want to do it. It’s a little daunting, you know to die and then be born again but I feel that it is something that I just do.”
Makaoi nodded his head in agreement. “The ritual is like an awakening more than a rebirth. We don’t really die but we visit another plane, a place where there is both peace and answers. We find strength in our roots and when we return we are one with ourselves, our tribe and our ancestors.”
Kaori and Makaoi had been coaxing Maliha to participate in an ancient rite that everyone born into this tribe went through. The Seh was a ritual that saw the death and of one way of thinking to only be reborn with anew understanding. Through the temporary death, the mind and body were awakened to its true state and a person true path was revealed to them. It was how everyone came into their powers; the only difference was that Maliha was much older than most people went through the ancient rite.
“I’m scared of what I will see,” Maliha admitted. “What did you see when you died Makaio?”
Makaoi stroked his chin as he stared off into the rippling water. “I saw my future, but it didn’t make sense to me at the time, it still does not but I know someday it will. Someday everything will click, and I will understand my purpose.”
Maliha leant her head on his shoulder as she watched her family interacting, a smile constantly on her face.
“Do you ever wish you could lead the tribe?”
Makaio jerked his head towards Maliha as his brows knit in confusion.
“No, I have always known it was never mine to hold.”
Maliha gnawed at her lip as she sat up and face her brother fully. “I think it is yours. I just have this feeling that you should carry the Daharrasol and not me. Makula once told me that the necklace was not, mine to hold anymore and I can’t help but feel that I was meant to give it back to you. The only reason I had it was so that you could identify me when I returned.”
Makaoi jerked away from Maliha in denial, ignoring all of her explanations. “No, it is not meant for me,” his head shook firmly.
“I think it is. Makaoi, listen to me. I can’t lead this tribe and I don’t want to. I wouldn’t know where to start but you would. You were made for this. I know technically as the daughter it should be my place, but I feel that I was lost to this tribe for a reason.” Makaio’s jaw was tense as he glared away from Maliha, his hands clenching as he breathed heavily. Maliha gripped his chin and force him to face her when he refused. “I know you feel guilty, guilty that I was lost and that our mother died.” Maliha’s voice grew thick when a tear trailed down his cheeks. “I know Makaoi, but it was never your fault. You did all that you could, and you have continued to do so. This tribe has flourished under your leadership. It is you who deserves this honour.” Maliha tried to take the necklace from around her neck but Makaoi jerked away from her as if she had a disease.
“Makaoi, please,” Maliha called frantically as her brother yanked away from her touch. Maliha staggered to her feet in an attempt to stop Makaoi from stomping off but he dismissed her touch, pushing her away.
“I can’t accept that necklace Maliha, it is not mine to hold!” He snapped before spinning on his feet and storming off. Kaori’s fighting stopped as he looked to Maliha and then his son. He nodded his head in understating before following behind his raging son.
“What happened?” panted Jiya, her face sweaty from her exertion. Maliha was hesitant to speak to the woman even though they had reached a truce and Jiya could read her hesitance.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me, I get it. I did not come off in the best of light, but I swear to you Maliha. I wish you and Enzo no ill will. My sister would be happy that he has someone like you. I know you love him, and I see the way he loves you. I’m sorry for ever doubting and challenging you on that.” Jiya lightly rubbed Maliha’s arm in apology, shocking Maliha even further.
Not only had the woman issued Maliha another apology, one that was more heartfelt and genuine than the first, but Jiya had touched Maliha which was not something that the Draganir people did very often, according to Enzo and Nkechi.
“Thank you Jiya, I truly appreciate it. You are still his family and one of the only people who truly knew his mother. You are fundamental to his life. So, thank you.”
Maliha brought Jiya into a brief hug before watching the woman disappear with Enzo in tow. Maliha waved at Enzo’s retreating form wildly until he was out of distance but the moment they were out of sight, Maliha’s heated conversation began plaguing her mind.
“He’s a stubborn man that brother of yours.” Maliha’s head shot up as the croaky voice of Hanan disturbed her troubled thoughts. “He had misled anger growing up and your father and I tried to quell it as much as we could, but I fear that all we did was misdirect his anger.”
“He’s just so angry at himself and it hurts me to see that. I know I haven’t known him for long, but for years I have craved my family and now that I finally have them, it hurts me to see them in pain. Especially when there is nothing I can do assuage his guilt and anger.”
Hanan hummed lightly, her old body sinking into the grass as she motioned for Maliha to follow suit “Sometimes, people are not ready to face the truth until they have no choice but to live in it. For years your brother has held all this shame and rage buried within him and now that you are here it is all resurfacing. He is struggling to deal with his own emotions. It does not help that in his Seh certain things were revealed to him that make your passing of the necklace not plausible in his mind. Your brother will deny the truth until he has no choice but to embrace it.
Yes, your choice may hurt him, but he knows the rightness of your words Maliha.”
“I won’t even ask how you know what my words were because your sister Makula had the same uncanny ability.” Hanan chuckled lightly before touching Maliha lightly on her hand.
“You know in your heart what your true path is. If you feel that it is not to lead the Nah Barros, then trust that feeling. Do not compromise in your beliefs to please your brother. He will accept what cannot be changed if the goddess wills it.”
Maliha pondered over Hanan’s words, taking them in and turning them over in her brain. Maliha hesitated to voice her worries but one look at Hanan had Maliha laying all of her worries at the woman’s feet, it was an ability that both sisters seemed to share.
“Do you think my father will be hurt?” Maliha had put her doubts to Kaori after their first talk but even know she feared that he had only been amicable because he had no other choice.
“Your father has dreamed of you for years. Many of his nights were plagued with nightmares of never seeing you again or losing you just as you two finally met. For years he was doubtful that this would ever happen, yet he could not stop his prayers that you would return. None of us could. No matter what your next decisions are, a burden has been lifted from everyone’s hearts knowing that you are alive and well. There was only so much hope I could give them when not even I had been bestowed with a true vision of you returning home. I knew you lived but our faith wavered with no knowledge of where you were and whether you would return. We hoped you would. It’s all we have prayed for. So, do I think your father will be hurt? No, Kaori will not care, as long as he can have you in his life, he will be happy.”
Maliha snivelled away her tears. The feeling of fullness that overcame her every time someone mentioned how long they had waited for her would never get old. There was such love and sorrow in their tones that she could truly feel what they had gone through.
Maliha hastily wiped at her tears when she spotted her brother making his way towards them. She shot to her feet and hurried her way towards him until she was wrapped in his sturdy arms.
“I’m sorry, Maliha.” Maliha’s shoulder shook with her suppressed tears as Makaio’s damp face sunk into her neck. His body shuddered with his sobs as he clung to her so desperately.
“I’m sorry too, Mak. I love you and I just want you to understand that whatever guilt or anger you hold, it isn’t yours to carry. Just let it go, brother. Let it go.”
Maliha squeezed him tighter as their father stepped closer and wrapped his arms around them both. In Maliha’s peripheral, she could see tribespeople staring at them with nothing but love and respect, but her focus was the feelings washing over her. The feeling of indescribable love.
She barely knew her brother or father, Maliha knew nothing more than the basics but in her heart, in her soul, she knew them as if she had always been here. This feeling of all-encompassing love flowed through them, as they snivelled and cried together, releasing years of anger, guilt and sadness and replacing it with love and acceptance.