Love Bites

She didn’t follow since she wasn’t dressed, but she walked to her door. Cory had closed his. She heard the front door open and close and a few seconds later, a car start and screech away.

Kayla changed out of her new things, putting on her plain old ones, then on old t-shirt and shorts. She walked back and forth in front of the bags of clothes and underclothes they had bought today – no, that Lily had bought.

Kayla refused to accept what was going on, even through she wasn’t quite sure what that was. After such as wonderful day, to have it fall apart so completely was unthinkable. A joyous day ending so utterly miserable.

Not accepting it, she divided her second drawer into three parts. The left side was her new underclothes, the center was her old things, and the right was Lily’s new things. Once done there, she put away the new dresses and tops Lily bought her, beginning to cry before she had finished.

She sat down on her bed after she was done, confused, and crying.

Something happened to Cory, and she didn’t know what, nor how to fix it. To hell with this, she thought. If nothing else, Cory owed her an explanation. He had driven away a friend. A good friend. One she owed her life to.

She got up and walked to Cory’s room, opening the door without knocking. The lights were off, but his fish tank gave off enough light she could see him lying on his bed.

She remembered the loud noise from earlier and looked around to see what it might have been. It didn’t take long to identify the game controller still hanging partially out of the TV.

Having no shoes on, she went around the other side, after closing his door behind her, to avoid the glass. Cory was in the middle of the bed, so Kayla got into bed beside him and was going to lay partially on him, but he rolled away from her before she got that far.

She scooted towards him and when she touched him, he tensed up. “Cory, what’s wrong with you?” she asked.

He was silent. “Why are you ignoring me? You can’t do t-this to m-me.” She said, starting to cry. “Talk to me damnit.”

“Can’t.”

“Can’t, or won’t?” she asked, hurt.

“Can’t.”

“Why can’t you? I’m right here, asking you – no, begging you to talk to me. Why did you make Lily go?”

“She did this.”

“Did what, Cory? You’re not making any sense.”

“She had to go. She ruined it.”

“Tell me what happened. I was here and don’t have any idea. Up until you sent her away, this was one of the best days of my life,” Kayla said as she started to cry again. She put her face up against his back and he moved away. “Will you at least tell me what I did to make you hate me? I can’t even touch you without you trying to get away from me.”

“It’s her fault.”

“What did I miss?”

“God, you’re so beautiful.”

“Thank you, but what’s that got to do with anything?”

“It’s her fault.”

“You’re saying it’s her fault I’m beautiful? I think mom and dad would have something to say about that. You’ve always said I was pretty,” she said, her crying subsiding now that he was talking somewhat.

“You were – are… But now it’s different.”

“Because I got a haircut? Plucked some eyebrows? Had my finger- and toenails painted? It’s still me. A little less hair, some paint, but still me.”

“Still you, but different.”

“Different. Is that it? You’re mad because we don’t look alike now? You said you like the way you look; I do… and you said I was beautiful…” she said more confused than ever.

“It’s not that,” he said again.

She was sad and confused and had enough games. “Then what is it, damnit, tell me,” she said, raising her voice as she shoved him with one hand.

“It’s… because of her that I… had those feelings about…about you,” he managed to get out.

“What feelings? What do you mean?”

“Those feelings. Wanting you. You’re my sister. That’s not right.”

“What are you talking about? You’ve seen me in skimpy bikini’s, my underwear, and up until a few years ago, in nothing at all. I haven’t changed that much. Bigger boobs, some, um, hair, nothing much else.”

“But tonight, seeing you like that… I had thoughts I shouldn’t have.”

“My God, is that what this is all about Cory Hudson? You got turned on by your little sister, so you banish your girlfriend and try to break my heart? That is so pleasing and so sad at the same time.”

“It’s not right.”

She grabbed his arm. He pulled away slightly, but she held on, not letting go of him, though he could have pulled away if he really wanted. Using her body weight, she pulled him on his back and before he had a chance to react, she was on top of him, sitting astride his waist, hands on his shoulders.

“Let me tell you a few facts. First, you’re acting like your feelings are the most horrible thing in the world, but actually it’s one of the most flattering complements you could have ever given me. With other boys, I know, the thoughts are going to be about sex and not love. At least not at first. You’ve known me longer and better than anyone and it’s been love, not sex that’s been there.

“But to know that even though I’m your sister, you even actually want me, well… I finally feel like a woman. To let you in on a secret my love, do you really think I’ve never thought of you that way?

“I know it’s taboo, but honestly, who would be better than you to take my virginity? And me yours? You would never willingly hurt me, you already love me, and I’m sure you would do whatever you had to to make sure my first time was the best it could be. Do you honestly believe anyone else could match all that?

“So sure, I had those feelings about you, too. If you weren’t my brother and we had the same relationship, I’d have offered you my virginity years ago. But we both know that since we are brother and sister, we would never act on it.

“And if you think different, well…” she said letting go of his shoulders, grabbing his hands and putting them on her hips. “If you feel that now that you’ve had those feelings, you can’t be around me because you might act on them, then I understand your feelings and give you permission to act on them right now.

“So, if that’s the case, right now, please make love to me. I live you this one time offer of my body, to free both of us of this bothersome virginity as well. So, you can act on your urges and I on mine with no repercussions or hurt feelings, just love and understanding. No one will ever have to know, then we can go back to the way it was and I’ll be more considerate of your feelings.

“We even have condoms. So, what do you say my loving brother?”

His hands moved down her hips to her thighs where she had rested her hands after making her offer. Finding her hands, he traced his way up her skin, gently up her arms, over the fabric of her shirt sleeves and shoulder to her neck. His hands continued up her neck, giving her chills and butterflies in her stomach as she was filled with a mix of anticipation and regret at what was about to happen.

She meant every word she had said. To keep her brother as he was, she would gladly give up her virginity to him to fulfill his wants and desires of her and in a way, her of him. But she wasn’t so sure how the future would play out. Would she have the willpower not to act on these feelings again? Would he asked to continue the sexual relationship? And if she said no, would that lead back to this very issue again?

She decided she would cross that bridge when she came to it. Right now, she needed her big brother.

His fingers reached her face, stretching from her eyes to her cheeks. He pulled her down towards him and he said, “You’re so smart and beautiful.”

Her face was an inch away from his and they looked into each other’s eyes in the dim light. She wondered what he tasted like.

“What did I ever do to deserve someone like you?” he asked, pulling her closer.

“I should get the condom…” she whispered.

“Shhh.”

She closed her eyes and pursed her lips to kiss him, but the kiss never touched her lips, but rather her forehead.

“You ended up with someone so stupid. Lily too. God, she must hate me.”

“So does this mean we’re not going to…?”

“As much as the offer means to me, as tempting as it is, no. The world would probably call me a fool for turning down the opportunity to be with you, but I love and respect you too much.”

She was as much relieved as disappointed, knowing Cory was feeling the same. Pressing herself against him, she shifted down on him until she was lying on him, and he grunted slightly. Feeling him pressing up against her, she pressed her hips down against him and said, “Sorry about that,” and rolled off him.

“Don’t be. I’d be dead to not have that happen now. It was actually my ribs.”

“Oh,” she said rubbing his chest softly. “So, are we okay now?”

“Yes. Just never make that offer again. I might not be able to turn it down a second time. You don’t know how much I wanted to take you up on it.”

“Actually, I bet it was almost as much as I wanted you to accept it. Why did you say no?”

“Because I knew if I did it once, I wouldn’t be satisfied, and you made it clear that was all your offer was. And I would lose you all over again if I couldn’t control myself. Losing you now that I’ve lost Lily would kill me.”

“Explain to Lily. She’ll understand. She loves you. Loves both of us. Do you know I offered my virginity to her as well? She turned me down too. Because of you, I think. Although her counteroffer was like mine to you. A one-time thing to have someone who cares for you to be your first. You deserve her, not me. Call her.”

“Maybe tomorrow. Give her time to stop hating me. I might need a few days for that actually. If ever…”

“Do you think that little of her?”

“No, but I know I hurt her… bad. I can’t just call her up and say, ‘Hey babe, come over so we can make up and make out,’ now, can I? It would probably me more like, ‘Come over and don’t bite me, or tear me limb from limb.’”

“Yeah, probably not,” Kayla agreed. “But you should reach out to her and let her know you want to talk.”

“Later.”

“Sleep with me?” she asked.

“I thought we established that I couldn’t, as much as I’d like to.”

She slapped his stomach and said, “I said sleep, not screw. Hold me? If not, tonight’s going to be a bad night for me, I can already tell. I was made pretty today, then rejected by not one, but two people I love.”

“Fine, just no morning wood jokes. Or midnight dream jokes.”

“Deal,” Kayla said.

“Get under the overs then,” he told her, and they both climbed under the comforter. Cory put an arm out and she laid on top, arms at her sides and he wrapped his arms around her.

She backed into him, so they were against each other, then held his arms that were holding her. “Goodnight big brother,” she said.

“Night,” he replied yawning, totally exhausted. He kissed the back of her head and they both fell asleep within minutes.