Last Christmas?

We ran for a couple of hours, and then I suddenly had an epiphany!

That’s right!, I realized that Christmas sucked!, and that it really was all for the best that Krampus succeed in their plot to use the Princess to rule the world!

“Malin!” I said, “You’re not gonna believe this, but I just realized that Krampus is right about everything!

Christmas always has been the worst holiday! There’s no reason to keep it around! We should help Krampus take over the world!”

“Ummmm…” Malin said with a frown, “I think you’re being mind-controlled.”

“No!” I said in disagreement, “I just had an epiphany! Like my road to Damascus moment!, ya know?”

“Riiiiight…” Malin said exasperatedly, “And so you don’t even care about what percent man, goat, and demon Krampus is anymore?”

“Weeeeellll,” I said uncertainly, “He’ll explain it eventually!, and then there won’t be any more confusion!”

“No he won’t.” Malin insisted, “He said that you’re a nobody, remember? And said that he doesn’t need to explain his origins to a nobody. YOU DON’T MATTER TO HIM.”

“If that were true, then why would he even bother to mind-control me?” I asked triumphantly, “Why mind-control a supposed nobody? I do matter to him!, and I’m going to help him and the Princess rule the world and make this the last Christmas ever!”

Malin got an expression on his face that made it look like he was thinking really hard, and he said that, “I know there must be some line of reasoning that would get you to break out of the mind-control, but I’m having a hard time thinking of it. Maybe I don’t know you well enough?”

“I don’t think that I’ll ever change my mind, Malin.” I said, “And if you won’t join Krampus, the Princess, and I; then I’ll have to put an end to your mission right now! You can only continue towards where Krampus and the Princess are if you agree to help us.”

“Suuuuure…” Malin said, “I’ll help you all. Time to end Christmas and blah blah.”

I could tell that Malin was lying, but I decided that it was at least a start.

It would begin with lying; but then he would eventually realize that he was wrong, and his commitment to our noble cause would become sincere!

AND, if his commitment to our cause never became sincere; then he’d just have to suffer the consequences for his lack of loyalty to the new rightful ruler of the world, now, wouldn’t he?…