Good Elf Gone Wrong: A Holiday Romantic Comedy

It was the day before the rehearsal dinner.

I was at the country club, walking through the evening’s schedule with the manager.

In another blatant copy of my wedding, my sister had opted for having a day of Christmas festivities between the rehearsal dinner and the wedding.

Last year, I had planned do that so people could party hard at the rehearsal dinner, to which the entire family was invited, and the wedding, which was going to be another big bash.

Any other bride would be at the venue with me, inspecting the final preparations. Of course, my sister had insisted she needed a spa day, a me-treat if you will, in order to recover from all the wedding planning she’d been doing.

Yes, please roll your eyes. I’ll wait.

As we walked through the country club, I kept looking around furtively for him—Hudson. He’d disappeared again after we’d made love. He’d gotten a phone call and just vanished again.

It’s not love. You don’t love him. You hooked up after he fixed your door.

I wondered if the manager had seen him.

Don’t ask him. Don’t be that needy, weird girlfriend.

Too late.

“Um,” I said, interrupting the manager. “I was—er, the bride was wondering if one of your employees would be working the rehearsal dinner—Hudson, Hudson Wynter?”

The manager frowned. “No, he wasn’t scheduled for this week, but if you see him, let me know. I need extra hands.”

At least Hudson was telling the truth about who he was. But why had he disappeared? Maybe he was just reverting back to his natural state of being a bad boy, like Dakota had said.

I picked at my nail polish then stuck my hands in my pockets, hearing my mother in my head criticizing me for damaging my nails.

After the walk-through with the manager, I gave in and tried to call Hudson again. It just went to a voice mailbox.

Crap.

I ran a hand through my hair then headed back to my parents’ house, trying to ignore the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.

“No word?” Dakota asked in concern when she joined me in the kitchen later to help with dinner.

“He’ll show up,” I said with more confidence than I felt.

“Hudson coming tonight?” Uncle Eddie asked as I dished out dinner that night.

“I don’t think so.”

“Did he know you were making meatloaf?” my uncle asked as he poured more gravy on his plate. “Your meatloaf is amazing. If Hudson had known you were making it, he absolutely would have shown up.”

I scooped crab, cheddar, chive, and garlic twice-baked potato onto his plate. Yes, it was imitation crab, but if it ain’t broke …

“I hope you’re not thinking I’m going to start feeding you bacon-wrapped meatloaf smothered in brown sugar and ketchup,” his wife said pointedly. “You’re going to eat your grilled chicken breasts, and you’re going to like it.”

“I always made sure my husband knew what to expect for dinner,” Grandma Astelle said, dabbing her napkin on her mouth. “Knowing he has something good waiting for dinner ensures your man comes home at night instead of wandering the neighborhood.”

“Don’t worry. Kelly was with me all day,” Aunt Janet joked, “so we know Hudson wasn’t with her.”

I hunched my shoulders as my family laughed, and Kelly glared at me.

My uncle reached for another slice of meatloaf.

“Give him some salad, Gracie,” my aunt told me.

“Sure. There’s more in the kitchen,” I said, glad for the excuse to escape.

Where was Hudson? Was he going to show up tomorrow? Would I ever see him again? Had I lost yet another boyfriend?

Fake boyfriend.

Yeah, tell that to my heart.

I had saved a piece of meatloaf and a twice-baked potato for myself in the oven. Leaning against the warm oven door, I scarfed down several bites, trying to fill the pit of anxiety.

Dakota hurried in the kitchen, and she grabbed the plate out of my hand.

“What is going on with Hudson? The rehearsal dinner is tomorrow. He knows that, right?”

“He knows. He’s just working,” I said weakly. “He’ll be here tomorrow.”

“Girl.” She shook me. “You gave that motherfucker $3,000.”

“Shhh!”

“He probably cut and run,” she said in a low voice. “A truck like that is expensive. He has a lifestyle to maintain, and he does it by scamming innocent people.”

I shook my head. “He said he owns the Canning Factory.”

“I looked it up, and it’s some random New York LLC.”

I felt sick.

“Maybe he started a shell company so his name wasn’t on the property.”

“Or maybe he’s been lying to you.”

“Hudson would never,” I insisted, not wanting to believe it. “He said he liked me, said that he was falling for me. I decorated his house for Christmas. He came back yesterday afternoon, and he’ll be here for the rehearsal dinner. He has to be. He promised.”

“Woman the fuck up,” Dakota snapped at me. “You can’t rely on flaky people. Stop seeing the good in everyone.”

“I see the good in you.”

“I ate all your Nutella and blamed the maintenance guys,” she said flatly. “I am a bad person. Rely on yourself. Stand up for yourself. For once in your life.”

“Hudson is going to propose to me,” I said quietly.

Dakota sucked in a breath.

“A fake proposal,” I added. “Right after he shows proof Kelly is a cheater.”

“Has he actually slept with her?” Dakota asked pointedly.

I squirmed. “Not that I know of?”

“The wedding is in two days, yet there has been no cheating. He was never intending to help you. You picked him up on a bus, Gracie. Stop being so obtuse. Everyone is using you, especially Hudson. He is not showing up,” she hissed. “You gave him cash. He is gone.”

“He’s not.”

I refused to lose faith. I believed in Hudson like I believed in the magic of Christmas.

Or maybe it was more like how I believed in Santa Claus, and we all saw how that turned out.

I tried calling him again. This time the phone said the mailbox was full.

“Oh my god.” I started to panic. “I think I’m going to puke.” The rich meatloaf churned in my stomach. “Oh my god. I thought I was in love with him.” I pressed a hand to my chest, fanning myself, trying to get some air. “He took my money, my virginity, and now I’m going to have to watch my sister get married to James. Oh my god.”

Dakota shook me. “Snap out of it, Gracie. You can end this wedding. You don’t need a man to ruin Kelly’s relationship. What would Carrie Nation do?”

“Go after both of them with a hatchet?”

“Exactly. Well, actually no, please don’t do that. You don’t want to spend Christmas in jail.”

“Right,” I said faintly.

“Think!” Dakota urged. “You have to come up with a plan. You are the only one who can save you now. Well and me. And Pugnog is there for moral support.”

“I’m having a panic attack. I can’t do this.” I gulped in air.

“Magic meatloaf.” Dakota cut off a piece and stuffed it in my mouth.

I snatched the plate back from her and wolfed down several more big bites, the flavors of beef, bacon, and ketchup exploding in my mouth.

“I need a cookie and an eggnog latte. Then I think I may have an idea.”