Glamoured (Shadow Beast Shifters Book 6)

Shadow released his hold on the alpha’s head but didn’t allow him to move again. The stasis energy remained strong. “The stones are unknown to me,” he said. He didn’t sound happy about it. “I won’t be able to deduce anything until we see them. They feel powerful through his memories. Apparently, they appeared when the child was born, underneath you as you gave birth, and he’s used them ever since to keep her healthy.”

Healthy was an overstatement, considering she was still a baby ten years after birth, but at least she was alive. Alive I could work with. “It frustrates me to no end that I can’t remember,” I bit out.

Shadow’s concern grew as he examined me. “The alpha should not have been able to manipulate your mind like that. What happened to you is beyond a shifter’s capabilities.”

I’d also long suspected that, but without my memories it was impossible to know what truly happened to me.

“Let’s go find her,” Mera said impatiently. “I think Sam has waited long enough to have her daughter safely in her possession. We can deal with the other shit later, including the mind manipulations.”

I straightened and wiped my hands against the tattered remains of my wedding dress. Was this really the moment I was going to have Tabitha in my life permanently?

Would my heart actually explode at the emotion of it.

“It’s fucked up,” I whispered through a ragged throat. “But part of me is grateful that I’ve only known about Tabby for the past few years. I would have lost what remains of my sanity if I’d had to keep handing her back to that bastard for any longer than that.” A selfish thought, since my child had existed without her mother for years. Even the small time I had with her now had allowed a bond to develop. A bond that should have happened years earlier, but I had to be honest—more years of this would have broken me completely.

Shadow, oddly, was the one to move closer, reaching out as if to touch my mind. By instinct, I shied away, aware of what his touch could do.

“I could search your memories,” he told me. “Ensure that what you’ve been told is what happened at the time of her birth.” He jerked his head toward the alpha, disgust marring his perfect features. “I’m struggling to see the truth through the confusion in this one’s mind.”

“Not yet,” I said with sharp jerk of my head. “The past isn’t as important to me as the future. Not after almost losing my freedom today.”

“Of course,” Shadow said simply, before he turned away. In typical godlike fashion, he didn’t wait for any of us before he strolled along the path toward the main shifter camp. Mera and I followed silently, and even though her arm was no longer tucked through mine, there was comfort in our closeness.

Some of the hurt feelings had faded. Mera finally understood why I’d acted the way I did, and it seemed that she was letting go of her anger over it. Personally, I still had a lot of growing up and repenting for my actions, but everything could wait until I had Tabby with me.

Tabby, and the stones that were apparently keeping her energy flowing.

Alpha Lorenze had allowed me to see what happened when he refused her “health elixir” as he called it, and the sight of her grey skin and listless body had terrified me to the point that I’d never questioned that bastard again. Risking my daughter was an absolute hard limit for me, and I never stepped close to the line after that day.

The alpha knew my weakness and he’d leveraged it just like any good dictator would. With my uber-independence and refusal to ask for help, I’d been prime pickings for his plan for the perfect heir—

“Stop blaming yourself,” Mera said shortly as we continued along the path.

Turning my head, I shot her a wry grin. “Can you read minds too?” I asked with a humorless laugh.

“I was just guessing based on your expression,” Mera said, “but I can read thoughts.” She said this so casually, as if she wasn’t admitting to some crazy ass power. “With Shadow’s help,” she continued. “I’ll probably be able to do it on my own soon, but I’m learning these powers at a stupidly slow rate. Not cool.”

This time my laugh was more genuine. It was a small relief to know she wasn’t in my head; it was a fucking mess in there. “You’re going to live forever. Don’t stress on not knowing everything now.”

She shrugged “After what we’ve just learned, it wasn’t hard to guess that you were beating yourself up. I would have done the same. But if I’ve learned anything, it’s that blaming yourself for being a normal person and screwing up isn’t helpful. Acknowledge, learn, and grow from the mistakes. If you continue to be your own worst enemy, you’ll never rise and claim your future.”

Rise and claim your future. Five simple words, nothing prophetic or even groundbreaking, but it lit a small fire in my gut. For too many years I’d been allowing life and all its bullshit to happen to me. Accepting situations I never should have accepted. Even my memory loss…

Shadow had offered to try and lift it and I’d knocked him back out of fear and exhaustion. But if I kept this shit up, I’d be the same fearful and broken shifter in the next ten or twenty years. I might live longer than a human, but my time was still finite.

“You’re right,” I said quickly, shaking my head as if I could clear years of cloudiness and neglect. “I need to change the narrative. Change my fucking attitude. And find the damn future my daughter and I deserve. I’ve been playing the victim for too long, but it has to end.”

Mera shot me a proud smile. “Girl, you have the brightest future ahead of you. I might not be fully psychic. Or even a tiny bit psychic. But I know that what I say is truth. I’ve lived it, and I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Angel is the brightest fucking light since claiming her true future, Simone too. Both of them took risks and got hurt, but now… they couldn’t be happier. You will do the same.”

Shadow, who had clearly been listening in, called back to us, “All of those that Mera considers pack have a greater destiny than they would have ever thought.” He didn’t turn, his broad shoulders visible a dozen yards in front, but his voice was as clear as if he stood beside us. “But only if you fight for it. The path to light will not come easily. But if you want it hard enough, you’ll make it in the end.”

“I want it,” I said without hesitation. “I will find this light you speak of, and maybe then my daughter will thrive too.”

These days I fought for two, which was more than enough motivation.

We reached the main section of village where the houses were scattered amongst the trees. Shadow picked up the pace, and my heart already felt lighter just knowing we were heading for Tabitha.

He turned off from the path, following a trail more suitable for when we were in shifted form. He used his powers to clear the debris. At this point I was moving as fast as I could without actually climbing onto Shadow’s back. We were so close. So fucking close to being done with Clarity and its bullshit. So close to having my daughter in my arms.

When we were deep in the forest, the air chilled off slightly as we rose in elevation. I didn’t recognize the terrain. I’d been in Clarity for a long time but I’d never explored this area.

Or so I thought, until we reached a small cabin. This was Alpha Lorenze’s private dwelling, and I’d snuck up here once using a different path to search for Tabitha. She hadn’t been inside. There was literally no sign of a baby at all, and I’d bailed before I got caught.

“She’s not here,” I called to Shadow, pain spilling into my words. “I’ve searched this cabin before.”

“She’s here,” he shot back.

Mera placed her hand on my shoulder and squeezed gently. “Shadow won’t let you down,” she said soothingly. “Trust in him. In us.”

Trust. If I’d done that from the start, I could have saved so much pain.

A new narrative.

I was ready and this was the first step.

“I trust in you,” I breathed. “Keep reminding me to open my mind and eyes. It might take a while, and I might need your grace more than once, but I’m going to keep working at it.”

“You have all the fucking grace,” she said fiercely. “Not a worry, my friend.”

The tear escaped before I could stop it, but thankfully Mera didn’t notice. Or if she did, she didn’t make a deal about it, and that was just one more thing to be grateful for.

Shadow reached the cabin first and disappeared inside. “What if there’s guards in there still?” I said, worry in my tone as I picked up the pace. “He’s holding Aurora, and the alpha was a straight-up megalomaniac. He could have left any multitude of traps inside.”

Mera snorted out a laugh. “Girl, if there’s something in there that could challenge Shadow, we’re all fucked. It’ll be fine.”

Right. Gods. I had to remember they were not like the rest of us.

When we made it inside the building, it was exactly as I remembered. A very sparse home, with only one brown lounge, a small round dining table, and nothing else. The fire wasn’t lit today, giving it a cold and abandoned feeling. I knew this wasn’t the alpha’s main residence, but one he escaped to. It would have been the perfect place to stash Tabitha, but I’d searched every nook last time.

We paused in the kitchen, and I looked around the sparse space. “Where did Shadow go?” I asked Mera, not seeing his presence either.

“His energy is below us,” she replied softly, leaning over to run her hands across the roughly hewn planks of wood on the floor. “My asshole of a mate clearly thinks I need to figure out how to get down there myself.”

Despite my internal panic and drive to get to Tabitha, I had to suppress a smile at the relationship between Mera and Shadow. They were clearly destined soul mates—anyone with sense would know that, but that didn’t mean it was always smooth sailing. They were still testing each other, and I liked to see it. The challenges kept their life interesting, but they knew at the end of the day they were a team. They had each other’s back no matter what.

I never expected a relationship was in the cards for me. Not any longer.

But if it ever was, I wanted this sort of love.

An imperfectly perfect one.