Fire & Pain - A Vampire's Tragedy

Adam

My heart was still beating up my throat after that experience. I doubt she realized how intimate this entire thing was. But it would be hard to explain the feeling if you hadn’t experienced it firsthand.

Sophia appeared to be completely oblivious to her magical core, and that meant she probably could only perform magic when she was on an emotional high. Which is not only unreliable but also hard to control. She could continue training her magic with emotional triggers, but that wouldn’t make her magic less predictable at all. It would also use a lot more energy than necessary.

She was starting from scratch, and that worried me. I wasn’t sure how she was supposed to cause a ruckus and defend herself on the night we planned to get her sister out of the tower. I also wasn’t sure if guiding her to her magical core will help her find it again later. The way she dissociated from her magic was very disturbing. I can only hope it’s fixable. I wonder what that tutor is doing to help her because, as far as I could tell, he didn’t start from the basics at all.

“Are you sure you’re fine with me guiding you?” I asked, needing confirmation again to ease my mind.

She smiled at me. “Yes, I am. Is there a reason I shouldn’t be fine with it?”

I shrugged. “It can feel very intimate, and I’m not sure if you would be okay with that.”

She tilted her head to the side, her brown hair falling into her face. I wanted to lean forward and brush it out of her face, but I stopped myself. We weren’t close enough to do such a thing.

“We can still stop when it gets too much, right?”

I nodded. “Yes, of course.”

A smile spread over her face again, making my heart jump. “Then that’s fine. Let’s start!”

Warmth spread through me, happy she seemed to trust me a little more now. “Okay, close your eyes again.”

This time, she did so without hesitation, making me grin like an idiot. I closed my eyes as well and took a few deep breaths.

“I want you to focus on your magic now. Try to summon a small fireball or a small fire. Whatever is easier for you. Think about what you feel when you use magic,” I said, trying to find the right words to explain this properly.

“I always feel angry or hurt when I use magic,” she said, proving me right about my assumptions. I doubt she could differentiate between the feeling of the magical core fueling her magic and her emotions, which made this entire thing a lot harder.

“Whenever you use your magic, there is at least one distinctive feeling you’ll always have, and it’ll always be the same, regardless of your emotion. Can you think of something like that?”

She remained silent for a moment before answering. “I can’t think of any distinctive feeling right now.”

I suppose it was time for Plan B now, even if I didn’t want to go down that route. “Try to think of something that angers you, something that would normally trigger your magic.”

I waited for something to happen, and it took a while before my fingers started tingling, and soon after, an icy feeling spread through my veins, up to my arm. It felt as if I was going to freeze inside out. Freezing my heart and my soul. My chest tightened, and I gasped for air, fighting the urge to rip my hand out of hers to stop this nightmare.

“Is that what you mean?” She asked, grounding me immediately, making me understand that this was her magic.

A laugh bubbled up in my chest. “How is it possible that someone who blasts flames all over the place, had such an icy feeling inside when using it?”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ll explain it later. You’re doing well! Just keep doing what you’re doing.”

Now that I knew what was happening, I focused on her energy, ignoring the pain on my skin as if I were getting frostbite, and followed her stream of magic. When I got closer to her magical core, she sucked in a breath and tightened her grip around my hand almost painfully. I bit the inside of my cheeks, taking the pain. I didn’t want her to lose her focus now, even if she might break my fingers if she put just a little more strength into her hold.

“Are you feeling this?” I asked, slightly tugging on her magical cord.

“Yes,” she whispered.

I followed the cord a little longer, until a massive fireball came into view, shimmering from orange to yellow to red. A golden shimmer surrounded it, making it look absolutely breathtaking.

“Can you see your magical core?” I asked, hoping she wasn’t blind to it. It was hard to see their own magical core, but with a little training, mostly meditating, it would become easier. All those meditation lessons at Samuel’s compound did have their benefits, I suppose.

“I do,” she said. “I can’t believe I have something like that inside me.”

“Seeing your own magical core can be helpful if you want to check for improvement or change with your magic. When you neglect your magic, your magical core might wither away.”

“What? I never knew that would happen if I didn’t use my magic! Is my magical core withering away?”

The pure terror in her voice was almost amusing, especially because she was worrying over nothing. Her magical core was thriving, even if she didn’t use her magic much at all over the past years. All the magic she showed up to this day was only a fraction of what she could potentially do.

“Don’t worry, your magical core is fine. But I believe that it’s not at its full potential. That’s okay, though. You’re training your magic now and with that, your magical core will grow. What’s important now is that you remember the feeling you have right now. If it’s the same feeling I feel, it’s an almost unbearable coldness in my veins.”

She chuckled. “You think it’s unbearable? I think it’s comforting and relaxing.”

Well, I suppose if you got such a strong fire in you, it might be a relief when you get a nice cooling, instead of more heat.

“One way or another, you’re a big step closer to finding balance and access to your magical core. As long as you remember where to find it.”

I opened my eyes and glanced at Sophia, seeing a faint reddish shimmer around her, almost as if she were on fire.

“Open your eyes,” I said.

She opened her eyes, and they widened as a huge grin spread over her face. “This feels amazing!”

I nodded. “This is your power. Don’t forget this feeling, and you never have to depend on emotions to access your magic again. No one can call you unpredictable and dangerous, as long as you know where your power lies.”

She teared up as she turned to me and pulled me into a hug, almost making me stumble to the floor in surprise.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

I wrapped one arm around her, enjoying her warmth and sweet scent surrounding me, and I wish we could stay like this forever. I had missed her hugs so much that it was almost making me break out in tears.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “You’re welcome.”

She pulled away from me, a shy smile on her lips. “Can we try some magic now?”

“We sure can,” I said. “Let’s throw some fireballs.”

She jumped up and removed a few leaves from her jeans, before reaching out her hand to help me to my feet.

“I’m so excited,” she said, and without a warning, a small fireball whirled my way. I quickly pulled up a shield, and it clashed against it with a puff, before falling to the floor with a plop.

She frowned. “Why is it so weak?”

“You used your magical core actively for the first time now, instead of forcing it to work with emotions. It will take a while before you can shoot fireballs of a stronger caliber again.”

She pursed her lips. “Do you think I can do that in the limited time we have?”

I sighed. It takes years of practice to access the magical core to its full potential, and even then, it’s not perfect. But looking at her big, pleading eyes, there was no way I could tell her that.

“Just try your best. In emergencies, you could still use your power through other means, but I wouldn’t recommend it.”

Her shoulders dropped. “I can’t do anything about that, I guess.”

“It’ll be fine. We can do it. But let’s use the remaining time we have to train. I have to be at the compound again soon, and I’m sure you also don’t have all the time in the world.”

She looked at her watch. “Shoot! You’re right. Let’s go!”

And with that, she threw another tiny fireball my way.