FULL NOVELXO Finn Rhodes Forever: Chapter 33
“WE CAN’T HAVE your baby shower at a strip club,” I told Sadie as the four of us gathered in the living room of the home she shared with Holden. Around us, paintings hung on the walls, some Sadie’s and some other local artists’. The home in the woods had huge windows, dark wood floors, and a mix of antique and modern furniture, giving it an old library vibe.
Sadie pushed her phone at me. “It isn’t a strip club, it’s a special event. Miri’s planning it.”
Avery snorted. “Of course she is.”
“She hired a bunch of male strippers from Victoria,” Sadie continued with a big smile. “Everyone’s going to be there. We can’t miss it.”
I scanned Miri’s Instagram post. She was renting out the town community center and bringing in an array of talented male exotic dancers.
Hannah leaned over. “Can I see that?”
“Really?” My eyebrows shot up in disbelief, handing her the phone. “You, too?”
She blushed, laughing. “I’ve never been.”
On the couch, Sadie rested a hand on her bump. Every time I saw her, it got bigger. Now that she was out of the first trimester, the morning sickness had gone away and she said she was feeling more like herself. Her skin glowed, her hair shone like a shampoo commercial, and even though she still fell asleep at nine every night, she seemed like she had more energy.
“It’ll either be a blast or terrible,” she said.
“Or both,” Avery pointed out.
“Won’t your man be jealous?” I asked Sadie. Holden wasn’t home. Sadie had said he was having dinner with Wyatt and Cora.
She gave me a knowing look. “Won’t yours?”
Going to buy you a house. Four bedrooms for Cora’s cousins.
We stared at each other, and a smile curled up on my mouth.
She pointed at whatever my expression was. “That’s what I thought.” She frowned and tilted her head. “Where’ve you been this week? He’s been at the bar but you haven’t been working.”
I squirmed, fiddling with the edge of the blanket on the couch. I was back to avoiding him because I was a coward. Thankfully, the bar was fully staffed this week and they didn’t need me most nights. The tipping point wasn’t him telling me he was going to buy us a house, and it wasn’t finding my research papers in his closet, or even him telling me he loved me.
It was the way he’d looked at me the next morning when he woke up, like he was relieved I was still there. The soft, affectionate way he had smiled at me made me want to be there when he woke up every day.
Fuck. I was so fucked. The feelings tightened around my throat.
“Busy with school stuff,” I lied, giving her the same excuse I’d given my dad.
The truth was, I couldn’t face Finn. I needed a breather from him. He was too intense, too hot, and around him, my walls of ice were melting.
“He’s different this time,” Hannah said quietly, mouth twisting to the side as she watched me.
Avery frowned and nodded. “Yeah. I’ve noticed that but I can’t put my finger on what it is about him.”
Hannah smiled. “He keeps offering to babysit.”
I made a face. “Really?”
She nodded. “Yep. He spends a lot more time with family than he used to.”
“Oh, yeah,” Sadie said, narrowing her eyes. “He’s been hanging out with Holden a ton.”
Avery hummed, biting her lip, glancing at me with uncertainty.
“What?” I prodded. “Go ahead. I know you want to say something.”
“I have a theory.”
My brow arched. “Okay.”
She tapped her finger with her lip. “In the past, when Finn would be in town, either living here during the year when you were away or visiting, he’d keep his distance.”
I frowned.
Hannah nodded at Avery. “Yeah. That’s it.”
“He spent a lot of time on his own or working. At family dinners, he’d usually leave early. It felt like…” She shook her head. “I don’t know, like he didn’t want to get too attached. And he’d be kind of mopey in the weeks before he shipped off to the interior of BC.”
Sadie pointed at her. “That’s totally it. He’s not like that this time around. It feels like he’s trying more.”
The three of them turned to me and I frowned down at my hands.
I couldn’t hear this kind of stuff. My defenses were already weak with him, and now this?
I had caved and let myself fool around with him, but I wasn’t going to fall in love with him. If he was trying to put roots down here, he was fooling himself.
I’d been fooled once—it wouldn’t happen again.
“Let’s talk about the baby shower invite list,” I said, changing the subject.
WE STAYED at Sadie’s until she started yawning and Hannah had to get home to help with Cora’s bedtime. Avery and I, the night owls, headed to her place to finish planning Sadie’s baby shower, and by the time I got home, the bar was closed.
Perfect.
I unlocked the door from the alley, expecting darkness inside, but the lights were still on. I frowned and walked down the hallway to the bar to turn them off.
In the empty bar, Finn sat in his usual spot, watching the TV above the bar. His easy gaze rested on me while I stood there, confused and frozen.
“What—” I started, shaking my head.
“I told your dad I’d turn the lights off.”
“Were you waiting for me?”
He nodded. “Wanted to make sure you got home okay.”
Liquid warmth wove through my chest. “Are you worried about me or something?”
“Always.” The corner of his mouth hitched. “When I’m not here, I’m thinking about you.” His eyes glittered and I shivered under the full weight of his attention. “You’ve been avoiding me.”
I cleared my throat and broke our eye contact. Sometimes, the way he looked at me, it made my pulse act like I was on a rollercoaster. “How are you feeling?”
“Great. Full health, thanks to you.”
I shrugged. “I didn’t do anything. Beck said it himself, you’re young and healthy so you would have recovered anyway.”
His eyebrows shot up. “You called Beck?”
I blinked. Busted. “No.”
Keeping his unnerving, knowing gaze on me, he walked around the bar counter until he was in front of me, towering over me. His cruel mouth turned up and his eyes were so bright. “You called Beck. You were worried about me.”
My face was going red. “Whatever.”
Wow, amazing comeback. God, I was so fucking transparent. I probably had fucking hearts popping out of my eyes like a cartoon.
Finn leaned down so his mouth was beside my ear. “You held my hand and got me blankets. You bought a thermometer. You were worried about me.”
His fingers stroked the back of my neck, sending shivers down my spine. His other hand came to beneath my chin, tipping my face up.
“I missed you this week,” he murmured.
I stared back at him, worry creasing my brow. My gaze flicked toward the hallway behind him, my escape route.
“Don’t you dare.” He backed me against the counter. “Say it, Liv. Admit why you’ve been dodging me this week.”
My throat worked and his eyes flared with heat, something dark and pleased.
I shivered. “Things are weird.” I met his gaze, biting my lip. My stomach was tumbling like I was rolling down a hill.
“You have feelings for me.”
I closed my eyes. Defeat.
“Olivia.” He tilted my face up. “Time to come clean.”
“I know,” I whispered, keeping my eyes closed. A weight sank in my stomach and I nodded to myself.
It was time to stop pretending I was unaffected by him. That I was anything less than falling for him like he had planned. That my plan wasn’t working in the slightest.
“I have feelings for you,” I whispered. My voice was so small and quiet. I opened my eyes to meet his gaze and the affection I saw there nearly made my heart stop.
“Baby. You say it like it’s a bad thing.”
I groaned in frustration.
“Was that so hard?” he asked, voice soft.
I turned away. The last time I told Finn how I felt, he left the next day.
“Hey.” He dipped his head to meet my eyes. “I know you’re scared.”
Alarm rose in me. Could he hear my thoughts?
“I’m scared too,” he admitted, a hint of worry in his eyes. “I’m scared you’ll wake up and realize I’m not even close to being good enough for you, and I’ll never see you again.”
I frowned. Why would he think that? “You are good enough for me. Don’t say that.”
Saying it out loud clicked something into place in my chest, and for the first time, I wondered if I was making a mistake, trying to get him to dump me.
When he smiled, I didn’t like how it didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m not, but I’m going to do everything I can to be that guy for you, Liv. We’re going to find the flower. I meant what I said about buying that house for us. Do you understand?”
I nodded. Showing Finn this tiny corner of my heart and him catching me like this filled me with confidence.
My heart beat like a drum in my ears and my gaze snagged on his mouth, the line of his lips. His eyes, so sharp and piercing and rimmed in thick lashes. My arms looped around his neck and my hand worked into his hair. His eyelids drooped when my fingers ran over his scalp.
“I understand,” I whispered, before I leaned up on my toes and kissed him.