Enceladus

My whole family was named after constellations. Except me. I had cried when I learned I was the only one not named after a set of stars. My mother sat me aside and told me my name did mean something, something important. It meant “the defender”. I tried to live up to that. Now I realized I never would and that was okay. I didn’t have to be the defender. I was never going to be. Still, I wondered what my constellation name would’ve been. Maybe Phoenix, a fire bird but I didn’t have much fire in me, or personality as Cassiopeia once told me. Maybe Lyra, an eagle carrying a lyre but I wasn’t much into music and I’d never actually seen an eagle.

Stars were a big part of Enceladian culture. We had a holiday based on the stars, we studied the stars like they were history. Enceladians weren’t religious but we believed in the stars. The stars were our gods and always would be.

Watching the Perseid meteor shower with Lainie on the roof of some downtown restaurant made me miss Enceladus. Not the people, not the planet even. I missed the stars. I missed how I could see every single star, every single constellation in the dark sky. Here, on Earth, I could hardly ever see the stars. With all the pollution and buildings, the sky was obscured.

“It’s so beautiful,” Lainie whispered as if speaking louder would disrupt the sight.

“It really is.” Honestly it was nothing compared to Ålmôn Klïp, Star Day, an annual passing of thousands of stars over a few of Saturn’s moons. I would love to show Lainie that.

What Lainie said the other day about not knowing everything about me scared me. How could I tell her that I was an alien? It just wasn’t plausible. I couldn’t ever tell her I wasn’t human. Then that got me thinking about the future. What if Lainie was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with? Then what would I do? Tell her? Leave her? Another thing was that I was over a hundred years old and I would only get older. She was mortal.

I remembered stories about humans and Enceladians. Long ago, Enceladian research teams went to Earth to learn of their customs and holidays and cultures. Whenever an Enceladian tried to tell a human they were really an alien, it didn’t end well. Not on Earth and not on Enceladus (Orion wasn’t fond of humans). Some humans laughed it off but some believed it and ran terrified. I didn’t want Lainie to be afraid of me or think I was crazy.

The meteor shower was ending. “Ready to go?”

My girlfriend nodded. She looked gorgeous in her long, skin tight, black gown. She took my hand and we left the restaurant. “Thanks for taking me.”

“Well, of course. Who else would I take?”

She giggled.

“What now?”

“Your place?”

My blood heated at the innuendo. “Sure.” I tried to act casual but the word came out high-pitched.

I drove a little too fast on the way to my apartment.

“Careful.” But the tone of her voice only caused my nerves and excitement to climb higher.

We got back safely enough and before I knew it, I was crushed against my front door, Lainie’s hands everywhere.

The next day at work, I couldn’t stop thinking about Lainie. I left her sleeping peacefully in my bed, naked. I should’ve called in sick.

“How are you doing?” John brought me out of a vision of Lainie kissing down my stomach.

“Fine.” It came out strained.

“Good.” John seemed to care an awful lot about my well-being. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he had a crush on me but he’d never made any advances. We looked the same age (twenty-one) but he was the manager of Café Brioso. I’d never seen him with anyone when we run into each other, which was surprisingly a lot for such a big city.

An enigma.

“How are you?”

“Good, thank you.”

We resumed working in quiet.

“John,” I started. “How old are you?”

He had his back to me and I watched him stiffen. “Uh . . . Twenty-one. Why?” He didn’t turn around. Why did he hesitate?

“Are you in school or anything?” I had been working under John for two years and I’d never asked him any personal questions even though I’d always been apprehensive of him.

“Not anymore. I got my Associate’s degree in business two years ago.”

He got a degree two years ago? When he was nineteen? “Then you got the job here?” I asked.

“Actually, I already worked here and when I graduated, I was promoted.”

It all seemed rather rehearsed.

“Do you have any siblings?”

“No, You-”

“I what?”

“Do you have any siblings?”

I nodded but wasn’t willing to give anything else up.

“I have to go do inventory.” He didn’t give me a chance to reply before he was gone.

“Happy birthday!”

Lainie jumped, almost smashing her head on the lit cupcake in her face. We laughed together before I told her to make a wish. She blew out the candle.

“Now I’m older than you.”

I laughed at the sheer absurdity of it. I was ninety-six years older than her. “Yes you are.” I kissed her forehead as she ate the cupcake. “Shower and get dressed in something warm but athletic.”

She squinted at me and I left the room.

Half an hour later, Lainie came out of my bedroom to eggs and toast.

“Where are we going?” she asked around a mouthful of eggs.

“It’s a surprise.”

After the meal, I ushered her into my car. Fifteen minutes later, we arrived at our destination.

“Zip lining?” Lainie screeched.

“Yep.” I laughed. She had always wanted to go zip lining and I had no idea what it meant until I looked it up. Truthfully, I was a bit nervous.

We checked in and our guide started to strap Lainie into a harness. I looked down. Mistake. Oh no, this is a mistake.

“You look nervous, babe.”

I nodded and closed my eyes.

“It’ll feel like flying!”

Flying. Something everyone on my planet could do.

The guide put the harness on me and then he was hooking Lainie onto some type of contraption.

“Lainie, wait-”

She was gone. Careening through the air. I could hear her laughs. I watched until I couldn’t see her anymore.

“Ready?” asked the guide.

I didn’t reply. He hooked me into the same contraption and started to count down. I went before he hit three. Then I was flying.

I should have tied my hair back because it was whipping all around my face. I could hardly see but that didn’t stop the bubbling laughter that came out.

Too soon it was over and Lainie was waiting on the other side, grinning.

“You look like you had a blast!”

“I did!” I was still laughing when she hugged and kissed me.

“Best present ever.”

“Oh but the day’s not over yet.”

We left ZipZone after two more times across different tracks.

I took Lainie to lunch at her favorite bar and grill downtown. She called it a “dive” bar, whatever that meant.

After lunch, we went shopping and I told her she could buy anything she wanted (except that white pea coat). She bought some lip gloss and a handbag.

For dinner, we went to an elaborate and expensive restaurant called Martini Modern Italian. We both ordered fettucine. She asked for a lemon drop and I got red wine which was nearly the same as Enceladian kïn only we didn’t have grapes.

She looked beautiful. She had re-dyed her hair that same striking blue. She was wearing a solid black, high-low dress. I was wearing a dark red knee-length dress. She definitely up-staged me.

During dessert, I took out her first gift and handed it to her.

She opened the box and gasped.

“Oh, Amy! It’s beautiful.” She slipped on the diamond bracelet.

“Yeah? You really like it?”

“I love it. Thank you so much, babe.”

“One more.” I gave her a bag that was stuffed with that white peat coat.

“Yay! I’ve wanted this for the longest time. I can’t believe you remembered.”

“Of course I did. Try it on.”

She did and it looked fantastic on her. She leaned in and kissed me passionately.

The rest of the night was spent in my bed.