Defying the Alpha

Truth be told everyone dies, even if you’re immortal you die eventually. Maybe not physically but mentally you do. It’s an endless circle, you’re born, then you die. I never thought I would be the reason someone had to die. I would be controlling someone’s life, in one flash it’ll be over. There’s no way I can do mind-compulsion without the proper training and unfortunately the only training I could receive would be from my dreadful mother, I’m not even sure she deserves to be called that after the secret she’s hidden my entire life. The sad thing is, it’s not even the fact that I am part vampire, I mean sure I am not thrilled about it but I will get it over it. It’s the fact that she had me and Amsterdam with another man, a man I never even knew existed. I was brought up believing that her mate was my father. So no, it’s not that I am part vampire, it’s how I am part vampire.

“Angel, snap out of it.” Adrian’s harsh voice snapped, causing me to break away from my haunting thoughts.

“What?” I snapped back. I shift away from Adrian who is at the foot of my bed. I came up to my room right after my parents left. The entire time I dwelled on the ‘what ifs’ and how that person will be dying for me to live.

“You need to get ready, we leave at midnight and it’s already eleven-thirty.” Adrian said coldly.

I roll my eyes at him. “I’m not going out to red carpet, I am going to murder someone, no need to be dressed nicely or anything like that.”

Adrian huffs in annoyance and rubs his temples before glaring at me. “I meant mentally.”

My cheeks flush up in embarrassment. “Sorry.” I mumbled while looking away from his intimidating stare.

“Whatever, be ready.” Adrian said. He turned away from me and walked out of my room, leaving me in a haunting silence that could easily suffocate me if I let it.

The time has come for Adrian and I to leave and go find me someone to sink my throbbing fangs into. About twenty minutes before midnight my fangs began descending out of the gums causing my gums to bleed and throb horrendously. I knew it was now or never despite the outcome. I had to do this for my own survival.

Adrian, a few of his guards and his beta, Luke. lead me into the depths of the woods where my prey awaits. Surprisingly Blondie; Luke, was the one who summoned the human tribute. From what I heard the human is a young woman and knowing Luke I am pretty sure he persuaded her with his ‘charm’ and his apparent ‘good looks’. Adrian and Luke are in front of me whispering to each-other super quietly that even I can’t hear them. Three guards stand behind me and two on each side. Adrian is really paranoid so I learned, I also learned he has a lot of enemies so it’s always better to be safe than sorry.

“What’re you thinking about back there, little one?” Blondie asked as he slowed down to walk beside me.

I raise an eyebrow at him but it doesn’t phase him. He looks interested and intrigued. “I’m thinking about how I am ending this innocent woman;s life.” I answered bluntly.

Blondie shakes his head and stops and grabs my arm and tugs me back. The guards also stop along with Adrian. “Listen to me, it’s life. You will have to get used to this. This isn’t a one time thing, you will have to kill people frequently to survive. It’s just the cold truth, I know you’re scared and feeling guilty but you can’t. In this world there is no room for guilt, it’s live or die.” I was surprised at Blondie’s words. I never pegged him as someone who was so deep and so wise. The question is why? Why would he go out of his way to calm me down and help me? What is he up to?

“Inspirational, let’s go. Now!” Adrian barked out. It was clear as day and I wish I took a picture but Adrian Nixon was jealous.

“He’s right, let’s go and get this over with.” Luke said as he nudged me to follow beside him. I smile slightly at him and walk beside him as Adrian leads me to the woman.

“How did you keep her there without worrying she would escape?” I asked curiously to Luke.

“There’s guards watching her.” Luke said curtly. Great, back to his jerk ways.

I don’t say anything. I follow silently beside Luke the rest of the way.

When we arrive I am horrified to see the girl with blood smeared all over her small, round face. Her hazel eyes wide with fear as she stares at Adrian and the others. I peek out from behind Adrian to get a better look at the young girl. Her blonde hair is all crazy and looks as if it’s been pulled. She is so petrified as she trembles vigorously. Tears stream down her flawless face and onto the dirt ground.

“Go and sink your teeth into her neck. Don’t think just do. Remember, live or die.” Luke’s soft voice whispered in my ear.

I want to scream at them and run as far away from the poor girl but I can’t. It’s as if I am paralyzed in my spot. I can feel my gums throb and my fangs descend out. My mind begins spinning endlessly and suddenly I don’t hear anything, nor see anything beside the girl. Her frantic heartbeat that could beat in rhythm with a drum. I can sense her fear as it washes off her like waves. Oddly, I don’t feel sad for the girl, I feel murderous. As if my feet have minds of their own they carry me to behind the girl where I grab harshly onto her shoulders. The young girl thrashes in my arms and screams loudly. I cover her mouth and look into Adrian’s eyes before sinking my teeth into the girl.

I sealed my fate, I am a monster, a blood thirsty monster.

I devour her blood as it eases the throbbing in my gums. Her scream die down and her thrashing ceases. The girl is dead, I killed her.

Then, as if I am a light switch. Everything is shut down and I no longer feel anything. No emotions, no thoughts, nothing. I am completely numb. I stumble away from the dead girl once I am satisfied enough.

I wipe my mouth away with the back of my hand as I look straight into Adrian’s eyes. As he searches my eyes I notice a flicker of panic flash. “F*uck.” Adrian whispered, loud enough for everyone to hear.

“What?” Luke asked as he walked right next to Adrian who watches me with the slightest bit of fear. Luke’s face morphed into realization and his mouth hangs ajar. “No way.”

“What?” I asked curiously as I twirled a random strand of hair.

“You lost your humanity.”