Colder

lunch was gone, but a crisp $20 bill was tucked under his plate. My face fell and I wished that I’d had a chance to say goodbye and wish him luck on his first day. I was also going to tell him to stop over-tipping that much on a $7 meal.

The rest of the day kept me very busy. Jasper came back for supper and over-tipped me again, but I didn’t have a chance to admonish him for it or even talk to him beyond taking his order. I was just too busy. I got the diner closed and everything cleaned up and ready for tomorrow buy 7:30 when I said a quick goodbye to Jo, who thanked me again for coming in early and headed out the back door.

I was walking down the gravel back alley, headed towards my apartment when a voice that sounded like velvet came out of the shadows from a nearby building and I stumbled, nearly falling on my face. “A pretty young lady like yourself shouldn’t be walking all alone at night.” Jasper stepped out of the shadows and moved to my side, “There are…predators, out here.” He said the word predators almost like he was talking about himself.

When I finally caught my breath again I squeaked at him, “You scared me to death!” I reached over and punched him in the arm, hard and felt my hand begin to ache almost instantly. “Ow!! What the hell was that?!”

Jasper was laughing hysterically at the squeak in my voice but his laughter cut off instantly the moment he saw me clutching my hand to my chest. He grabbed my hand and brought it to his face, examining it closely, wiggling my fingers and bending my wrist slowly back and forth. “I don’t think it’s broken.”

I blinked in surprise, “Broken? I…” I stuttered, “Your muscles are like stone.”

Jasper just nodded as he continued to examine my hand, eventually releasing it, though somewhat reluctantly, “I think it’s sprained. Come, I’ll get you home and wrap it up.” He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and began to lead me down the back alley towards my apartment. I noticed he was incredibly warm and wondered for a moment if he ran hot in the same way I ran cold. I was surprised by how much I actually enjoyed the heat radiating off of him.

“You’re so warm.” I whispered and nudged in a little closer to him.

He cleared his throat and looked down at me as he walked, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips, “Yes, I tend to run a little warmer than most.” I could hear the amusement in his silky voice as we walked up the steps to my apartment. I fished out the keys with my non injured hand and unlocked the door. Jasper led me inside and had me sit at the kitchen table. “Where might I find your first aid supplies?” I pointed him in the direction of the bathroom and he was gone only a few seconds. He returned with a small bottle of something and a tensor bandage and proceeded to very carefully wrap my hand in the bandage. His warm fingers brushing against my skin and the glittering of his violet eyes in the dim light of my apartment was beginning to stir up all sorts of feelings inside me.

“So, how old are you, Jasper?” I asked, desperate to take my mind off of the swirl of emotions rooting around in my already knotted up stomach.

His half-smile caused my breath to catch in my throat as it always did and my heart thundered. “I am twenty-three years old. And yourself?”

“Twenty. I’ll be twenty one in July.” I replied. This wasn’t helping my nerves. “How is your arm so…hard?” I asked, suddenly curious again as to why my hand was sprained.

He chuckled and brought my hand to his mouth, brushing his fiery lips against my throbbing hand before dropping it. “There, all wrapped up.” He paused briefly, “I may be small compared to most of the other loggers around here, but make no mistake about it, I am all muscle and toned muscles can be very hard.” He grabbed the small bottle he’d brought from the bathroom and opened it, shaking out two pills into his hand. I watched him with curiosity as he moved about my kitchen, grabbing a glass from the cupboard, like he’d already known where they were, and filled it with water. He passed the glass of water and the pills to me. “That should help with the pain and allow you to get some rest tonight. Is there anything else I can do for you?”

I swallowed the pills dutifully and shook my head, my eyes wandering down his body and back up again, resting on his perfect face. His pale skin glowed in the dim light. He watched me studying him and ran his hand nervously through his wavy, bronze coloured hair. “I should be alright I think, thank you for your help.”

He nodded silently and headed for the front door. He stopped with his hand on the doorknob and turned back to me, his eyes flickering with curiosity, “What days of the week do you not work?”

The question caught me off-guard, “Oh. I’m off Fridays and Saturdays.”

He nodded slowly, a distant look in his eyes like he was thinking about something. He opened the door and turned to step through it. “Good night, Miss Amelia. I’ll see you tomorrow for breakfast.” His voice was low and thick as he walked out the door and I desperately wished it was morning already.

I dreamed about him again that night and again it was the same dream. Him in the field, walking over to me, looking for all the world like an angel straight from heaven and then suddenly his hands were trying to strangle me. I woke up covered in sweat again.

That morning I went in to work around the time I normally do. Jasper was already there when I got there. I guess he bribed Jo to let him in early. She was standing behind the counter chuckling at whatever words had come out of his pretty mouth.

“Good Morning, Jo. Jasper.” I said as I stepped behind the counter to pour myself a cup of coffee, “Here a bit early aren’t you?” I directed the question to Jasper.

He looked down at the plate of food in front of him as though he was ashamed, “I couldn’t resist. I was just starving, thinking of Jo’s wonderful cooking. You sure you can’t be my mom, Jo? If you feed me like this every day I’d be happy to follow whatever rules you set in place.” He winked playfully at her.

Jo’s face flushed red, “Oh now, Jasper, you’re going to make an old woman blush talking like that. But I’d be happy to adopt you same as I have, Amelia and every other kid in this town. They’re all my children.” She walked over to the cooler and grabbed a small box of milk and pushed it towards him, “Now drink up your milk! Make your bones nice and strong.”

Jasper tipped his head politely, “Yes, Ma’am” he popped open the top of the carton and tilted it to his lips. Jo headed back into the kitchen, chuckling the entire way.

Jasper set the milk down and turn to grin at me. I almost spit my coffee out my nose - He had a milk mustache. Without thinking, I reached forward and brushed my thumb across his upper lip, wiping away the milkstache. He grabbed my hand and held it against his cheek, his eyes boring into mine like he was looking straight into my soul.

“I…I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have done that.” I stammered, quickly pulling my hand away and reaching for the coffee pot to refill his cup.

He winced as if in pain, “No…no it’s ok.” He looked like he was about to say something more but he just frowned.

I was suddenly very self-conscious about what I’d done. “Let me get you some more coffee!” I said nervously and jumped to grab the coffee pot. Jasper leaned across the counter, reaching out to stop me. The shrill noise of the ringing telephone startled me and I whirled around to face it. I felt the coffee pot still in my hand as it crashed against the side of Jasper face like a crystal vase shattering against a granite floor. My eyes widened in horror and I turned to stare at Jasper, steeling myself against the grisly scene I was sure to find there.

There was nothing. Jasper was perfectly fine, there was no blood and no cuts. The only visible damage to his skin was a slight pink tinge where the hot coffee had splashed against it. We stared at each other in shock and he opened his mouth as if to speak but changed his mind and slammed it shut, his face twisting into agony. He grabbed his lunch and the travel mug I’d lent to him yesterday and whirled around to walk out the front door before I even realized he was gone. I just stood there, staring at the spot where he had stood just a moment before. He moved so fast some times that I didn’t even see it. I felt horribly guilty and unbearably curious, slightly afraid and a little more than angry all at the same time.

I spent the rest of the day in a daze, focused on Jasper and what had happened that morning. I’d went over the interaction in my head a hundred times and I still didn’t know what to make of it. How is this even possible! That coffee pot should have turned him from the beautiful specimen that he was into some sort of scarred, disfigured beast. There had been so much splintered glass to clean up, there was no way that should not have sent to the hospital. Then he just took off, with no explanation! Well, when I saw him again I was just going to demand an answer.

But he didn’t show up at all for the next two days. I began to wonder if maybe, because of me, he’d gone back home to Texas. I spent both days in a complete funk, which wasn’t helped any by the nightmares. Now while Jasper was strangling me in my dreams, I was attempting to defend myself with plates, pans, knives, forks and coffee pots, but no matter what I hit him with it just glanced off doing no damage at all. I woke up screaming and clutching at my throat.

I was as polite to my customers as required but I sulked around in a bad mood the entire time. I wandered through the days, barely paying attention to where I was going or what I was doing, trying to convince myself that it had all just been a dream and the mysterious Jasper didn’t actually exist. Jo had noticed my mood, she kept watching me like she thought I was going to explode at any moment. She was careful not to mention Jasper since that first day when she noticed he didn’t show up and I just shrugged my shoulders and walked away from her.

It was a warm Friday morning when I walked down the stairs of my apartment, having given up any hope of him returning to St. Elias. I was heading out to go hiking on some of the more experienced trails in the park. I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings as I was still thinking about the nightmare I’d had again last night. I still didn’t understand why he was trying to kill me.

He was standing at the bottom of the stairs, a sheepish and apologetic smile on his face and a cup of coffee held out towards me. I nearly fell down the rest of the stairs when my eyes locked onto his and instinctively I grabbed at my throat. So he had been real, I hadn’t just dreamed him after all. Realizing my hand was still grabbing my throat, I dropped it and quickly descended the remaining steps.

“Good Morning, Miss Van Rybroek.” His smooth voice greeted me, his violet eyes twinkling in the morning light. His glance flickered briefly to the hand that had been just grabbing my throat but he said nothing about it.

I reached out to take the coffee graciously and stopped on the bottom stair, “Thank you. Good morning to you too, Jasper.” I smiled coolly. I was still angry with him for disappearing, “Care to tell me what happened?”

Jasper tilted his head curiously and looked at me, “Happened?”

I wrinkled brow angrily, “I smashed you in the face with a coffee pot then you left without a word of explanation and you’ve been nowhere to be found for the past 3 days. I thought you’d gone back to Texas! What was that all about?!”

Jasper’s eyebrows furrowed as he listened to my words and then, without warning he began to laugh, a deep throaty chuckle, “The coffee pot took me by complete surprise and frankly that coffee burned like hell and I was trying not to embarrass myself and scream so I left. You look like you are about to go hiking?” I knew he was trying to change the subject so I let him.

“Yes, I am just on my way out. Don’t change the subject. Jasper your face should be covered in cuts and bruises right now, that pot was in a million pieces, there is no way you don’t have a bunch of glass embedded in your skin.” I pushed at him, demanding a reasonable explanation.

He just shrugged at me, “What can I say? You didn’t hit me very hard you know, the pot was probably just old and the glass weak. It would have shattered the next time you set it down a little too hard, anyways. I was gone the past couple of days simply because I was sick.” He looked at the worry and disbelief on my face, “Really, Amelia. I’m fine. It was a lucky fluke but everything is fine. Don’t worry your pretty face about it. I forgive you.”

I nodded at him and managed a weak smile. He took my elbow and guided me off the last step and turned to head north of town, “May I accompany you? You did promise to show me around after all.” He changed the subject.

I pondered this for a moment, I was still a little dazed and confused but he said it was fine and everything looked fine and I found the prospect of spending the entire day with him to be completely thrilling. “Alright, you can tag along. Try to keep up will you?” I took off at a jog, heading north.

I didn’t take much for Jasper to keep up with me, he was in very good shape. I focused on my breathing as the buildings moved past me at a steady pace. We rounded the last corner to go past the logging camp and Jasper was right with me the whole time. It was as if he’d run this exact same path a thousand times before. I saw the start of the trail ahead of me and tried unsuccessfully to slow my speed, I grabbed at a tree and swung myself against it to stop. Jasper followed suit and we both fell into peals of laughter.

“You run like you…knew where we were going.” I said breathlessly.

“I did.” Jasper replied and doubled over in laughter again. I sat down on the side of the mountain, to relax for a moment. Jasper sat down beside me and after a few minutes the laughter and gasping subsided and out breathing returned to normal.

“How long have you been here, Jasper?” I asked cautiously.

“I arrived the day I met you.” He replied, turning his eyes to meet mine. The corner of his lip turned up and for a second I was dazzled.

I wasn’t exactly sure how to respond to that. “Ok. Let’s go.” I said and stood up. I turned toward the thin trail that wound its way up the side of the mountain. Jasper followed closely behind me.

“Where are we going?” Jasper said from my right side.

“To that little clearing and cliff I told you about. I said I’d show you everything.” We carried on in silence for a ways. I pointed out different landmarks, fallen trees, boulders and paths that led to waterfalls or creeks, things I’d promised to show him one day. He looked around and listened intently to everything I said, paying close attention to the paths that crossed our own. His attentiveness gave me the impression that he was planning on going exploring on his own one of these days. I hoped he would be careful, there were lots of dangerous animals, cliffs and other dangers out here that could easily kill you if you didn’t know what you were doing.

The tree line suddenly gave way and we stepped out into the clearing, the long grasses swaying in the breeze. It was a very plain clearing, there wasn’t anything spectacular about it, not even a rock to sit on. The only amazing thing was the view on the far side of the clearing where the ground fell away into a cliff that dropped 40 feet or so. In the mountains views like this were usually obstructed by the tops of trees that grew hundreds of feet into the air but miraculously this view was completely clear of all obstructions. You could see the ring of mountains that surrounded the small gully where the town stood. You could make out some of the larger buildings in town, but most of the houses were too small to see clearly. You were barely able to see the small creek that ran along the west side of town and followed the base of the mountain off into the forest. There were a few hawks circling the skies, flying gracefully through the overhead clouds. It really was a magnificent sight.

I led Jasper across the clearing and sat down on the ground, dangling my legs over the side of the cliff. “I love it here. It’s such a beautiful view.”

Jasper followed suit, taking a seat beside me, “Yes it is quite…serene. I like it here too. But are you not afraid of falling off the edge of the cliff, sitting like this?”

I laughed at that and shook my head, “No, not really. I suppose I should be though right? It is a 40 foot drop onto hard packed earth after all.”

Jasper nodded, “Yes you’d likely break your neck and a multitude of other bones were you to fall.”

I just shrugged, “I’ve been coming here since I was a kid and it hasn’t happened yet so I’m not worried about it. I do wish I could find that other clearing again though.” Jasper glanced at me curiously and waited patiently for me to continue. “When I was a kid, about 7 years old, I was out here hiking. My aunt thought I was at a friend’s house but I would always use that as an excuse and go hiking by myself. I came across this really pretty clearing. It was full of so many bluebells it looked like an ocean of waves in the wind. There was a huge boulder on the far side that I could easily climb onto. It was shadowed by a huge weeping willow tree whose branches dipped so low they brushed the tops of the waves. It was the perfect place to sit and read. The sun always seemed to find a spot to peak through the clouds and light up the entire meadow. I spent the whole day there but when I tried to go back again the next time, it was gone. I was certain I’d gone the right way but I must not have. I’ve spent years combing these mountains since then, looking for that meadow and I’ve never been able to find it again. I’ve had so many dreams about it though that I’m now certain it never existed at all and it was just a place I had dreamed about as a kid. My happy place, as it were.”

Jasper’s eyes got this far off look, like he was picturing that meadow in his head. After a few moments of silence he turned to me, “It sounds like a beautiful place. I can see you there easily, sitting on that rock, the sun sparkling off your hair. You would fit there, perfectly, like that meadow was made for you or something.”

My face flushed at the compliment and I sighed softly, staring out over the little town far below me, “If only it were a real place.” I thought about that clearing and the day I thought I’d found it, It had been quite a long hike to get there.

Suddenly I burst into laughter and Jasper looked at me, clearly startled by my outburst, “What on earth is so funny?” He asked me, seriously.

“I can… only imagine what... my aunt would have said…if she’d ever found out about…my hiking.” I managed to get out between the peals of laughter.

Jasper thought about this for a moment and he frowned deeply, “I imagine she would have been very upset with you for hiking alone in the mountains at such a young age. That was incredibly reckless you know.” He didn’t seem to find this funny at all but I was picturing my aunt’s face as it turned tomato red and then purple like it so often did when she was truly furious, I couldn’t help but laughing. “You enjoy putting yourself in dangerous situations, do you?”

My laughter began to subside and my breathing returned to normal. I looked at Jasper, a little shocked at how serious he was being. “That was years ago, Jasper. Sure, I know it was dangerous now and I shouldn’t have done it but nothing bad ever happened to me so why worry about it now.”

A flicker of anger crossed his face, “Because you should be a little more concerned with your safety. Just because you got away with it as a kid doesn’t mean you should be reckless as an adult. These are treacherous mountains, you have no idea what lives in these woods. You should never go hiking alone, or sit on the edge of a cliff,” his voice began to get louder and more frantic, “Just like you should never walk home by yourself at night or invite someone like me into your house or be alone with me at any moment! Don’t you understand how dangerous these things are? You could get yourself killed!”

I was taken aback by the sudden outburst. What was he talking about, being alone with him? How is this dangerous? It’s not like he was going to hurt me. “What… What are you talking about? How is this dangerous?”

Jasper growled, “You’ve got your feet dangling over a 40 foot drop that if you slipped or the ground gave out around you, you’d break every bone in your body!”

I shook my head vigorously, “No, I get how that’s dangerous. I meant you. How is being here with you, dangerous?”

Jasper stared at me wide-eyed. His mouth snapped shut and he swallowed hard. Clearly he hadn’t meant to say that. “N-nothing. It’s not, just… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. I don’t know what came over me. Can we just forget the last few minutes, happened?”

I nodded slowly but kept my eyes focused on his face, trying to riddle out for myself what he was talking about. There was certainly something different about him. He has a bit of a temper, clearly. His skin is unusually pale and sometimes it looks like it is glowing, I’ve never seen eyes the colour of his before, I’ve heard that Elizabeth Taylor had violet eyes but I imagined they were more like blue with a hint of purple, his are very clearly the colour of amethyst. His body feel like it is as hard as marble, there is no way that I should have sprained my wrist punching him like that and I’m sorry but that thing with the coffee pot? I didn’t buy this weak glass bologna he was trying to sell me. When he moves he never makes a sound and often he seems impossibly fast. And sometimes he has this look on his face and I’m certain that he knows what I’m thinking.

His eyes looked into mine and he sighed deeply, “You have every right to be suspicious of me… I shouldn’t be here… I’m sorry… I should go.” He stood up and headed back across the clearing.

He’d made it half way to the tree line before I realized what had happened. I scrambled to my feet and hurried after him, “Jasper! Wait, don’t go. Please.” He stopped in his tracks and turned towards me, his eyes questioning. I stopped in front of him, my eyes wandering over every inch of his stunning face and I knew right then that he was something else, something more than human and I didn’t care what it was. I wasn’t afraid of him. “I…” I started, unsure of how to say the words, “I don’t know…what you are. But I do know that you are something… beyond human. You move too quickly, your muscles feel like iron and the coffee pot… and you sometimes speak like you’re…a lot older than you look. There is something off about your skin too, like it almost glows or something and your eyes… I have never seen eyes that colour before. And sometimes… sometimes I think you can read my mind or something.” I shook my head and smiled at him, “But whatever you are is beautiful and I’m not afraid of you.”

His face twisted in pain and he winced as he listened to my words. He smiled weakly as he looked warmly into my face. His hand lifted and he brushed his fingertips tenderly across the cool skin of my cheek, “I haven’t been very careful with you, have I? I can’t seem to help it, I always let my guard down around you.” He dropped his hand and looked away, his face suddenly hardened in anger, “But make no mistake about it, I am extremely dangerous and you should be afraid of me. “

“Well I’m not.” I said indignantly.

He growled and turned towards me, “You don’t even know what I am, Amelia! Don’t say you aren’t afraid of me. That’s the entire point to me being what I am. Every part of me is designed to seduce you, my voice, my looks… all of it. I am supposed to be so beautiful that I draw you in and you trust me even when your subconscious is screaming for you not to.” He gestured to the hand that I clutched my throat with when I’d first seen him that morning and I knew that somehow, he’d known about my dream.

I took a deep breath and forced my voice to remain steady, “What….exactly… are you?” I was scared now, but not because he thought he was dangerous, but because this was strange, this couldn’t possibly be happening, someone like him, someone beyond human couldn’t possibly exist, and if it did… What else existed?

He looked off into the distance as if pondering how to answer that question, “That’s a complicated question.” he replied. He glanced into my face and saw that I was staring at him, my face determined. He sighed, knowing it was useless to try and evade it. Suddenly that beautiful half smile tugged at the corners of his lips again. “That depends on who you ask. Most middle European countries call me a revenant, sometimes a wight. The Scandinavians call us Draugr. The Dine call us The Holy People, The Christians call us Fallen Angels, Watchers or those who bear the mark of Cain. But mostly we’re called Vampires.”

I gulped. Ok, I was afraid now. I had already known Jasper was something different. This shouldn’t be that much of a shock, but still, there was something about hearing him say it out loud. He was right. He was dangerous and I shouldn’t want to be with him. But I couldn’t help it, afraid or not, I wanted to be with him, even if that means it literally kills me. “Ok. I can deal with that.” I managed to squeak out.

Jasper’s face grew hard, almost angry, “What do you mean you can deal with that? I am a Vampire, Amelia! I’m a monster, a murderer, something that belongs in a horror story to terrorize women at night. And you’re ok with that? That I kill humans for food?” He saw clearly that I was afraid of him now and his features turned from anger into despair as he took a step away from me.

I stopped for a moment as the reality of his words sunk in. I swallowed hard and choked on it. Then a thought occurred to me, humans eat three meals a day… “D-do you…h-how… how…many…times a day do you…eat?” I stuttered out as my heart thundered in my ears.

He blinked at me in surprise and confusion. It wasn’t exactly the question he was expecting. It took him a second to riddle out why I was asking. “Oh. Well we don’t eat three times a day like humans do. How long we can go between feedings depends on what we have been hunting and how large our last kill was, and we don’t eat humans that often. It’s…complicated.” He sighed unhappily.

As I listened to his explanation, my heart began to slow down and I suddenly wasn’t quite as afraid anymore. He heard the beat of my heart slow, and shook his head, “No you were right to be afraid. You should be. The majority of the time vampires actually feed on animals, deer, bears, cougars, moose, that sort of stuff. It’s not that humans aren’t appealing, it’s just that our self-control is excellent. but... oh jeez, this is going to sound cliché…. Once in a blue moon, and I do quite literally mean a blue moon, something happens to us, our thirst overtakes us and we are…” he paused, searching for the right word, “compelled to feed on humans. We can’t stop it, we become slaves to our nature.” He looked down at me, searching my face for a reaction, “That’s why I disappeared for the last 3 days. There was a blue moon Wednesday night and I didn’t want to hurt you because if I’d stayed, I wouldn’t have been able to keep myself away from you.”

He saw the look of forgiveness in my eyes and interjected quickly, “Don’t get it twisted now! Just because most vampires have the self-control to not feed on humans save for when the compulsion strikes. That does not mean that we are not tempted beyond belief by being around them. Self-control takes a lot of effort to maintain and there are vampires out there that don’t bother to even try. Your pull is strong to me, Amelia. To be near you tests my self-control every day as it is but…if I’d killed you…” his silky voice was layered with anguish at the thought, “I’d have had to find a way to die right along with you.” He gently brushed my cheek with the back of his fingers, his eyes glistening with his pain and he gazed into mine.

I was surprised to find out that this didn’t bother me. That it was easier to accept his nature than I’d expected it to be. It wasn’t his fault, he had no choice. I could forgive him for it. I cupped his cheek in my hand and he closed his eyes, leaning into my cool skin. Lifting myself to my tip toes, I leaned in and pressed my lips against his. His eyes opened in surprise and before I knew it he’d wrapped his arms around my waist and was kissing me back fervently.

After a few moments he reluctantly pulled away from me, lifting my chin with his fingers to look into my eyes, “This is dangerous for you. We shouldn’t be doing this but… I am an incredibly selfish creature it seems. I cannot keep myself away from you so as long as you’ll have me, I’ll be right here.”

I searched his face, confused. In what world would I not want him? This crazy, strange vampire wanted to be with me and somehow he thought I wouldn’t feel the same. “Then get used to being here because I am never going to stop wanting you.” I leaned up and brushed my lips against his again and he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me into him and hugging me tightly.