Chase: and the girl who came back

My head hurts, I feel like shit, and I am about to “talk” to Dad for what feels like the first time in two weeks. He was pissed off on the phone. He wanted to know where we were and why we weren’t home. I’d rather still be on Arden’s couch with Chase.

I brace myself before walking through the door, heading straight for the kitchen. Dad is sitting at the table with a glass of amber liquid sitting in front of him and the bottle beside the glass. Dad doesn’t often drink given he is always at work and Mum was an alcoholic.

I stand in the doorway a little unsure of how to approach him.

“Yasmin, sit please.”

I take a seat at the end of the table, closest to the door while I wait for him to speak.

“Where’s Millie?”

“She’s at a friend’s house.” I reply keeping my voice calm. He hasn’t been around; he has no right to be questioning me like I’ve done something wrong.

“I don’t appreciate coming home to find no one here and no evidence that either of you were here last night.”

I can’t help it. I scoff in his direction. “Really? We’ve seen you three times in two weeks. You promised to make more of an effort. That isn’t making an effort, Dad.”

“Watch your mouth.” His tone tells me he’s pissed. But so am I.

“You have no right to decide to be a parent now. You haven’t been a parent in years.”

“I’ve tried, do you know how hard it is?”

“Yes Dad, I do. Because I’m the only parent Millie knows. Mum was never home, and you were always at work. Who do you think cooked dinner? Helped her with her homework? Made sure she had clean clothes for school?” I start to lose my calm. I try to think of Chase to ground myself and it works a little.

“Newsflash it was me! You told me it would be different when we moved here. You lied. It isn’t any different. If you can’t be here, I’m taking Millie with me next year when I leave. She can finish school in New Hope.”

“You can’t do that. I won’t let you.” I’d like to see him try and stop me. I’d call his bluff.

“I can promise you she isn’t going to want to be here home alone all the time. She may be fifteen and can look after herself, but it doesn’t mean she should have to. I missed out on being a teenager. She deserves to be one.” I gave up everything for Millie, I don’t regret it, but after being able to have fun with friends last night, I finally see what I missed out on.

“You had no issue being a teenager last night when you went to a party. Did you take Millie with you? That’s not being very responsible, Yasmin.”

How dare he?

“No Dad, I didn’t take Millie. For the first time ever, I went to a birthday party for a friend, I had a great time, and I know what I’ve been missing out on now. Millie was safe. I could have fun.”

“I find that hard to believe. Where was she?”

It makes me angry that he chooses now to question me. “She stayed with Nat.” I watch his face twist with confusion while he catches up with what I’ve said.

“Nat?”

“Yeah. You know the same Nat that you would leave us with when we lived here? The only mother I really had. If you hadn’t been so selfish, maybe I wouldn’t have had to raise Millie on my own.” I wait, letting my words sink in.

“You don’t know what happened.” He looks pained, as if just the thought of Nat physically hurts him.

“Actually, I do. Nat explained everything to me. She told me all about Mum being the reason her husband is dead and how you left without any explanation. You broke her heart. You know that, right? She loved us. How could you move us away?” I’m shaking at this point. Unable to hide my anger any longer. I’ve had time to process what Nat had told me.

She’s answered all our questions and has filled in the gaps as much as she could.

“You don’t understand. It wasn’t that easy.”

“Help me understand then?”

“I can’t,” he looks away from me.

“Why not, do I not deserve to know the truth?”

“Yasmin, I’m your father, I’m not arguing with you about this. When did you speak to Nat?” his hurt has been replaced with anger.

“Last weekend. I’m dating Chase.” There is really no point hiding it from him. He’ll find out eventually. May as well be from me.

“That was quick.” A look of disgust flashes in his eyes and my stomach drops. Is he really insinuating what I think he is?

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I spit out, letting all my hurt and anger out with the words.

“It means maybe you are more like your mother than I thought. Drinking, partying, dating a guy you’ve known less than two weeks.”

I jump up, and my chair falls to the ground with a thud. “You have no right speaking to me like that. You can’t be absent my entire life and then all of a sudden decide you want to be a parent. It doesn’t work like that. Since when do you drink whiskey at five in the afternoon?” I yell. “For the record, I’ve known Chase longer than two weeks. Are you forgetting we spent the first 4 years of our lives together? Chase, Nat and all of their friends have been nothing but nice and welcoming. They’ve quickly become the family that both Millie and I have craved.” I start pacing the room. I’m shaking and furious at him.

“They have gone to huge lengths to make sure I’m okay. You know why I need someone to make sure I’m okay, Dad?” I question, I can’t keep the venom from my voice. I guess if it is all going to hell, I may as hammer the final nail in the coffin. I don’t think there is any coming back from this. Not after he just insinuated I was an easy alcoholic. He doesn’t respond.

“It’s okay, no need to guess. I’ll just tell you because it’s not like anything will change. I’m diabetic, Dad. I have been for years. I’ve barely managed to keep it under control, until we moved here that is. I met these people, and they took me in. Looked after me when I passed out at school and they’ve been helping me get it managed. Nat has even organised for me to meet with a specialist to learn more about the disease. The things that you should’ve been doing for me.”

He turns to look at me. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Would it have changed anything? You should’ve been around to notice.”

He doesn’t say anything to me. He looks away.

“I’m not going to stand here and let you take your shit out on me. I’ll come back later to get some clothes for Millie and I. We aren’t staying here while you are behaving like this.”

“You can’t leave Yasmin. I forbid it.” He says to my retreating back.

“You’re five years too late dad, I don’t care what you say. You can’t stop me from leaving.” I don’t wait for his response. I’m out the door, across the street, and knocking on Chase’s door before the first tear hits my cheek.

The minute he answers, I fall into his arms. He holds me tight and moves us to the couch while I let the tears fall.

“What happened?” Mumma Nat asks from beside me. She’s rubbing my back, soothing me.

“He’s an asshole. He pretty much just accused me of being exactly like my mother because I went to a party last night and am dating a guy I’ve known for less than two weeks.” I continue to sob into Chase’s chest.

“Unbelievable,” Nat gasps.

“I yelled at him. Told him about my diabetes and that he can’t decide to be a parent now. I told him I was going to take Millie with me next year, because I’m not leaving her alone here if he is going to keep working stupid hours and avoiding being at home, I’ll get a job, two if I need to, to help support us. He knows about my diabetes now. I don’t want to go back. He’s drinking.” My words tumble out quick between sobs.

“I’m going to talk to him.” Nat says firmly.

“You don’t have to do that Nat. You haven’t seen him in fourteen years.”

“I do. Because a father should never talk to his daughter like that. He needs a wake-up call and I’m going to deliver it. It might be fourteen years too late, but I’ve got to try. I’ll grab yours and Millie’s uniforms while I’m there. You can stay here tonight while he cools off.”

“Thank you,” I choke out. The emotions strangle me. Nat is behaving like an overprotective parent. This is what it feels like to have a mum.

“You’re welcome darling girl.” She gives me a kiss on the top of my head and disappears. I kind of wish I was a fly on the wall for that conversation. Dad has no idea what is about to come through his door.

Chase holds me until my tears subside.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks quietly.

I shake my head in response.

“What do you need? What can I do?”

“You’re doing it. This is what I need.” I try to get closer to him. He tightens his hold.

I don’t know how much time passes, but Chase moves me slightly so he can retrieve his vibrating phone from his pocket.

“Yo.” He says. I can hear Arden on the other end of the phone but can’t hear what he is saying.

“Are you sure that’s okay?” he asks. I don’t try to listen. I focus on the rise and fall of his chest.

“I’ll fill you in tomorrow, but Yasmin is here and she’s okay. Thanks man,” Chase says hanging up the phone.

“Millie asked to stay over there tonight. Martha has cooked tacos.”

I laugh softly. “Taco’s are Millie’s favourite.”

“Arden figured that out when Millie got really excited. Ally and Rhys have gone home so he is going to watch Coco with the girls tonight. His dad got Julia an early copy. Millie’s going to stay there tonight if that’s okay with you?”

“As long as Arden doesn’t mind. It’s probably better she stays there. I don’t really want her to see me like this.” My face is blotchy and red from the tears. “I’ll talk to her tomorrow after school.”

“Sounds like a good idea. Why don’t you go and have a shower then you can curl up in bed with your Kindle while I help GW with dinner?” Chases says.

“I’d love that. But my Kindle is in my overnight bag at Arden’s.”

“Arden bought you a spare one. There is one on my bedside table. He has one at his house as well. He even gave one to Ally AND Rhys. He didn’t want you to ever be without one. Kind of like your glucose monitor. Speaking of which…” Chase says gently moving me from his lap so he can retrieve a monitor for me.

“Arden really does think of everything. Even if that is a bit overkill,” I say while pricking my finger.

“That’s because it’s the way Arden knows how to show affection. His dad was never around so would constantly buy gifts, making sure Arden never wanted for anything. Arden does the same thing for his friends,” Chase tells me while we wait for my result.

6.2

My sugars have been sitting in a normal range the last few days. I’ve been feeling a lot better. That could also be to do with the fact that when Chase holds me in my sleep, I sleep for six hours. Without night terrors. I feel like a new person.

Chase gives me a towel, one of his shirts and a pair of my pyjamas I left here during the week and leaves me while I have a shower. I let the water cascade over me while I cry again. Letting out all the hurt that Dad’s words caused.

I crawl into Chase’s bed and power up the new Kindle Arden bought for me. He really does go overboard. But I appreciate the thought. Logging in, I start reading Game Breaker, the next book in one of my favourite rom-com series by my favourite Kiwi Author.

Chase comes in to tell me when dinner is ready. I don’t want to put the book down, but he promises that I can keep reading after dinner.

I stop him before we walk out of his room. Reaching up, I kiss him softly.

“Thank you,” I whisper against his lips. He responds by deepening the kiss briefly before pulling away and leading me down the hallway towards the kitchen.

Nat still isn’t back from Dad’s. I wonder what is happening over there? I hope she’s okay.

“How was the party last night?” GW asks after we are seated and have started eating. They made chicken schnitzel and vegetables for dinner. There’s even mash potato. My favourite. My stomach flutters. Chase paid attention when I told Ally one day that I could live off mash potato.

“There were clowns, a mime, huskies painted like a tiger and little people,” I answer

“Sounds like Arden. How did Ally take the little people?”

“As well as you’d expect. She swore at Arden, threw back a shot, and made Arden promise to buy her some hair thing to apologise,” Chase answers. I still can’t believe Ally is afraid of little people. I enjoyed bringing it up as often as I could last night. It was fun getting a reaction out of her. I hoped it helped distract her from the truth bomb Rhys dropped on us.

“That’s my girl. Arden knows better. I’m glad she made him pay for it.”

“Did you see that Arden included a Fitbit in every gift bag last night?” I ask Chase.

“Yeah, he told me earlier in the day. There were also some iPads and some iPhones as well. He pulled out all the stops last night.”

“Holy shit,” I say around my mouthful of mash potato.

“Did everyone behave?” GW asks us.

“Ralph only had to send Ashley home. Ally and Yasmin got a little drunk and Arden got very drunk. But at least he made it to his bed this time,” Chase says.

“Good on you, you deserved to have some fun,” GW directs at me. “Ralph needs a bonus. That girl is trouble.”

“Agreed,” Chase and I say together. We need to talk about the whole Rhys and Ashley thing. There must be something we can do to help him. It’s not fair.

Once we’ve finished eating, Chase sends me back to bed to read while he cleans up.

He soon comes in and moves me so that I’m resting on his chest. I go to turn the Kindle off, but he stops me.

“Keep reading.” He picks up his phone and starts texting someone.

“I’m almost finished. Messaging Mum?” I ask, concerned that Nat still isn’t back.

“I just want to check in. I know she will be fine. Just want to make sure.” He kisses my head and then starts scrolling on his phone while I read. I could get used to this. The comfort and safety I feel while in his arms makes me smile.

“Arden says the girls are forcing him to watch High School Musical,” Chase says when I finally finish my book.

“As if they had to force him. His obsession with Gabriella is way over the top. He probably offered.”

Chase laughs. “You’re most likely right. He’ll be happy he has an excuse to watch it again.”

“Did you get to talk to Rhys last night? How is he?”

“We spoke briefly. The whole situation is fucked up. I feel like a shitty friend because like he said, I never asked him why he was with Ashley. I know I couldn’t stop it, but I could have supported him a little more.”

“You weren’t to know. I wasn’t expecting Rhys to answer. Honestly, I thought he hated me.”

“I don’t think he hated you. He was cautious. He knows we don’t let people in. You came in like a cyclone and knocked us all over.”

“It’s because I’m delightful right?” I ask.

“Yeah, we’ll go with that,” Chase says sarcastically. I smack his chest playfully.

“What is Rhys going to do?”

“I don’t know, but we will be there to support him in whatever way we can. We’ll find a way to get him out of it.”

“You know he and Ally like each other, right?”

“I didn’t until last night. Actually, I think I did. I just didn’t want to see it. I don’t want either of them to get hurt.”

“You have to let them make their own choices. You and Arden can’t force him to stay away.”

“We can while he is still with Ashley. Ally deserves to be more than the ‘other’ girl.”

“She does. Promise you’ll keep an open mind about it IF it comes up later?” I really want both Ally and Rhys to be happy. We just need to figure out a way for them to be happy together.”

“I’ll try.”

“That’s all I’m asking. I don’t want to go home,” I say my voice wavering. Chase has done a good job distracting me. I just can’t help thinking about Dad and what he said.

“You don’t have to. You can stay here as long as you want.” He lifts my chin and looks into my eyes before kissing me, making me temporarily forget all about Dad.

***

I wake up to an empty bed and loud voices in the house. The alarm clock shows it’s seven a.m. Who the hell would be here at seven a.m.? I strain to listen, unable to make out the voices. I pull on one of Chase’s hoodies and creep out to the hallway, staying quiet so I go un-noticed.

The closer I get to the kitchen I quickly realise it’s Dad. I peek around the corner and Chase spots me. He subtly shakes his head. A silent warning not to come in. I retreat so I’m not seen but can still hear.

“I don’t agree with you,” Dad says angrily.

“I don’t really care David. Like I said last night, Yasmin and Millie will be staying here until you sort your crap out and pull your head out of your ass,” Nat responds in a cool tone.

What?

What happened last night?

It must’ve been bad if Nat is insisting on us staying with her. Not that I mind. I feel more at home here than I ever have in my own house. I miss my books, but they are just material. What Chase, Nat and GW provide is more than that. They ask about our days. Nat even messages me to ask when she works night. They pay attention when Millie and I speak, and they make us feel wanted and included.

I guess this is what having a real family feels like. I miss Smalls. He was the closest thing to family we’ve had. I wonder if he would get along with everyone here? We’ll find out at graduation.

“You have no right,” Dad says.

“No David, after the way you have behaved, you have no right. Those girls deserve more than what you have given them. I may work double shifts to keep us afloat, but I can promise you there is no doubt in Chase’s mind that I love him. I made it work. Why didn’t you?”

“I’m not allowing my teenager daughter to stay with her ‘boyfriend.’ Who knows what happens here? The last thing I need is to become a grandfather at 38 because you think you are a better parent than I am,” He spits out. Completely ignoring Nat’s question. Unbelievable. If his plan is to piss off every person he knows, he’s right on track.

“How dare you?” Nat yells finally losing her cool. I peek again to see that Chase is barely containing his anger. I can’t help myself. Just as I’m about to storm in there, someone touches my shoulder startling me.

“Don’t,” GW says before he heads into the kitchen.

“I thought you were better than this David?” GW says coming to stand beside Nat. “You need to leave.”

“Not without Yasmin and Millie,” Dad says.

“They aren’t coming with you David. I don’t appreciate the way you are speaking to Nat. In her own home. Yasmin and Chase have a lot of respect for this house. I can assure what you are thinking is not happening here,” GW says.

My cheeks flush. GW is defending Chase and I. It’s true, we haven’t had sex. Chase wants to wait and he’s right. We have more respect for Nat and GW. We both may be eighteen, but neither of us will do anything to jeopardise Nat’s trust.

“They’re my daughters. They WILL be leaving with me!” He yells again.

“No, they aren’t. Last chance, it’s time to leave. Or would you like me to call the Sargent? We played golf yesterday, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind making a house call,” GW questions.

Dad huffs. “This isn’t over.”

I quickly retreat to Chase’s room so Dad doesn’t run into me on his way out the door.

My head spins as I replay the conversations from last night and what I overheard before. I need to talk to Millie. Find out if she’s okay with staying here for a while. I believe Nat when she said that we were welcome. She’s not given me a reason to doubt her.

My phone vibrates in my pocket.

Millie: Julia has let me borrow a uniform. Can you bring my bag to school? We will meet you there.

Yasmin: Sure. Is Arden driving you girls?

Millie: No. Ralph is. Arden is on his way to pick you guys up.

Yasmin: Ok see you at school. Love you.

Millie: Love you too.

I put my phone on Chase’s dresser and notice my uniform on a chair in the corner. Nat must’ve put it there when she got home last night. I check my sugars. They are a little low, but food can wait. I jump in the shower, not at all ready to face everyone at school today.