Burn for Burn

THE HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM IS SO CROWDED, I THINK everyone who came to homecoming must be here. The boys are mostly on the floor or leaning against the walls, and the girls are sitting on the chairs and couches. I’m on a couch sandwiched between Rennie and Alex. Rennie’s head is on Ash’s shoulder, and she’s finally stopped crying. I want to cry, but I can’t. I don’t have the right. I am responsible for this. I am the one who put that ecstasy in his drink.

When Reeve’s parents got here, I couldn’t even look at them. Ash whispered to me, “Mr. Tabatsky is crying.” I just kept my head down and stared at the floor. Mrs. Tabatsky had on house slippers. Rennie jumped up and gave her some tissues from her purse, and they hugged each other for a long time.

Next to me Alex says in a low voice, “He’s going to be fine.”

It’s not comforting. Because Alex can’t know that. Nobody can know that. They say he’s in stable condition, but they’re running tests on his brain and heart to find out what caused the seizure. He definitely broke his leg. They don’t know yet if the fall caused permanent damage to his spine. Reeve. Reeve the quarterback. Reeve, who loves to dance and goof off and swim, not being able to walk anymore? It’s inconceivable.

I’m praying with all my might that the doctors don’t do a drug test. I know that was the point of tonight, to get Reeve kicked off the team. But what if someone does an investigation? What if they figure it out somehow, that Kat, Mary, and I were behind everything? What’s going to happen to us then? I wish I was there with them.

When Alex gets up to go get the Tabatskys some coffee, Rennie sits up straight. “Lil, what was Reeve saying to you up there? On stage?”

“When?” I ask, not meeting her eyes.

“Right before he kissed you,” she says flatly.

I feel my cheeks heat up. “Nothing. I don’t know. He wasn’t making any sense.”

“From where I was standing, it looked like you kissed him back.”

“No, I didn’t! He practically attacked me!” I lower my voice. “He didn’t know what he was doing, Ren. He must have had a lot more to drink than the rest of us.”

Rennie nods. “He definitely didn’t seem like he was in his right mind.” She chews on her fingernail. “But you know how I feel about him.”

“I swear, Rennie. I didn’t kiss him back. I don’t know what else you want me to say.”

Rennie bites her lip and nods. A few tears fall down her cheeks. She wipes them away, then goes to sit near Reeve’s brothers. I get up and go to the soda machine. I want to turn my phone on and make sure Kat and Mary are okay, but using a cell phone at the hospital is against the rules. I guess I’ll have to wait until I can slip away.

What on earth are we going to do now?