FULL NOVELXO Chapter 7 Pregnancy
After I got home, I did not want to think about Gavin. Regardless of whether we had a chance to meet again, I did not want to bother him about my unborn child. In fact, I resolved not to let him know about it for the rest of my life.
I tested all the pregnancy test sticks I bought, and the results were the same. But I still was not sure, so I went to the hospital for another test.
The doctor asked me if I was married, but I did not answer right away. She looked at me with caring eyes.
I said, "I am divorced."
The doctor nodded and asked, "Where is the child's father?"
"He's currently in jail."
"Then... In this case, only you can decide whether to abort the child."
I thought for a moment and asked, "Doctor, I have had a miscarriage before. I want to know if I can get pregnant again if I lose this baby?"
"It is difficult to say. Your condition is not good after the miscarriage, but you are pregnant now. No one can predict what will happen in the future. I am not sure if you can get pregnant again because there are risks. I really can not guarantee anything."
"Then..." I nodded and said, "Give me time to think about it."
After that, I sat alone in the corridor of the hospital, thinking deeply. This was the Maternal and Child Health Department. There were pregnant women with big bellies coming and going, all accompanied by their partners while I was alone, holding the test sheet and sitting on the cold bench of the corridor.
I don't have any obsessions towards having a child, but since I had it now, I didn't want to lose it so easily.
When I lost Roger's child, I felt utterly discouraged. Now it was as if God had given me another chance to be a mother. I did not want to give up. Besides, it's hard to say if I could have another child in the future. So it did not matter if it was Gavin's child or not.
After thinking about it, there was a ray of clarity in my depressed heart. This child was the hope of my new life, and I must let it grow up healthy and happily.
To get through the pregnancy in peace, I decided to move out of my old apartment and find a place far away from Gavin to settle down.
Thinking of Gavin's determined tone that day, I felt let down. "No matter what my future life is like, I do not want to bother him anymore. I do not want him to know my situation. Otherwise, if his smart brain cooperates, my secrets will be revealed immediately."
I have already finished the first part of the multiple-choice question in dealing with my pregnancy alone, but there were still a lot of problems I need to consider.
I needed money to raise a child. In addition to renting an apartment, I also need to take care of nutrition and health care, check-ups, hospitalization, postpartum, feeding, etc., including the child's schooling. These were all the problems I was thinking about.
When I got divorced, I decided to leave home because I wanted nothing more to do with Roger. When he went to prison, I was not involved either. But now the problem was that I did not have much money to save in the last few months. I also did not want to ask my parents for anything. They were getting old, so they should not worry about me anymore.
I thought it would be better to find another part-time job now that I had strength and was enegetic. But for the sake of my baby's health, I would not take a job that is too strenuous.
Just when I was at a loss and struggling to move forward, a phone call at home dragged me into a deeper abyss. ☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐