Bad Intentions: Chapter 38
“Lily, just for you, I’m taking tails tonight,” Tyler said as we let ourselves into the small animal recovery room at the vet clinic.
“Really? To what do I owe that honor?”
“I don’t know, I’m just feeling generous, I guess, considering what you have to put up with at home, living with a maniac and all.”
“He’s not a maniac.”
“But he is an arsonist, at the very least. I mean, that much is proven.”
“I don’t think you understand what proven means. A shocking headline in a local rag and no police charges doesn’t mean something is true.”
Tyler studied me, slipping on gloves and assembling the cleaning products for the cages.
“If I didn’t know better…I’d say you have a soft spot for the guy.”
“A soft spot? Me? For him?” I sounded like a cartoon character right now, but I couldn’t find a way to make myself stop.
“Yes, a soft spot, you, for him,” Tyler parroted and laughed. “I’ve seen it all now. The ultimate good girl falls for the quintessential bad boy, and to be clear, in this case, bad boy means murderer.”
“He didn’t murder anyone…” I trailed off, Jack’s face flashing through my mind. “You don’t know him.”
“And you do?”
Yes. Absolutely.
I shrugged. “We understand each other, sometimes…the parts no one else sees.”
Tyler was quiet a moment, cleaning a litter tray, and then he sighed. “Well, shit. I was just teasing you, and you go and get real about it. Okay, I don’t know the guy, but I know you – the common, public basic bits, that is – and I know…” He pointed at me. “You deserve the best.”
“Don’t say that. You sound like my dad.”
“Huh, triggered the Daddy issues, eh?”
“More like ‘failed parental hopes and dreams’ issues, with a side of ‘only child pressure to please’ syndrome, if that’s a thing.”
I divided cat food into bowls and avoided Tyler’s eyes.
“It’s definitely a thing. I might know a little something about it, too,” he admitted.
I raised an eyebrow at him. “Is that right?”
Tyler smiled. “I mean, I haven’t found my own arsonist to fall in love with, but yeah, I can relate a little, I guess.”
Love. Fall in love with.
I scoffed, and Tyler grinned at me.
“Mark my words, Williams, HHU next year this time. I bet you and Cayden are a thing, and I’ll have to tease him mercilessly for it when we’re on the same team.”
“You want to be a Hellion?”
“Hells yes, I have a brain, of course I want to be a Hellion, but a green-and-black Hellion, not a purple one.”
Purple and black were the colors of HHH Hellions, and green and black were the college colors. The teams of Hade Harbor were both called Hellions, so the different colors helped to differentiate them.
“Hm, I could see you in it, actually, and for your information, Cayden and I won’t be a thing at HHU.”
“No? Are you planning on upgrading to me? I’m in.” Tyler gave me a flirtatious smile.
“Hilarious. Actually, I’m not going to HHU.”
It was the first time I’d said the words out loud. They sounded wrong somehow. I didn’t like it.
“What? You have a world-class college on your doorstep, your friends, your family, Maine beauty all around…why would you want to be anywhere else?”
It was a good question, and one I didn’t have an answer to.
I got home late from the vet clinic, the supplies I’d stuffed into my pockets feeling like lead weights as I’d hurried home.
I went to my room first and unloaded my pockets, checked in with my parents, finding them already asleep, and then went to shower. I stood under the hot spray for a long time, washing the day off. The last forty-eight hours had been utterly exhausting, and I needed a moment to catch my breath. Life was rushing by so quickly after years of slow motion.
I shut off the shower and groped for the towel. Damn, I’d forgotten to put it on the rail. I shook off, squeezing out my hair as best I could before stepping out onto the mat.
Then I noticed the figure standing against the door.
Cayden was shirtless, with low-riding shorts on, the kind that only just seemed to stay up, hooked on the V-shaped muscles of his lower abdomen. I tried not to stare, but it was tough. He had my towel clutched in his fist. So, I hadn’t forgotten it after all. Heat rose over me in a wave.
“You left the door unlocked,” he said, moving toward me.
“Really?” That wasn’t anything unusual. I was used to privacy on the bottom floor of the house, but since Cayden had moved in, I’d been more conscious of his presence. My cheeks heated at his slow inspection of my wet, naked body.
“Really.” He took the towel in his hands and approached, wrapping it around my shoulders, his strong hands rubbing the terry cloth over my skin in broad strokes. He was drying me off.
“How’s your side? We need to change the dressing,” I rambled as he finished drying my back and moved down to my ass and thighs. The towel rasped over my sensitive skin as he dried me slowly and thoroughly.
“Spread,” he instructed thickly as he slid the towel between my legs.
I braced my arms on the counter and parted my legs. The towel slid between them, rubbing over my tender inner thighs and making me hot and bothered all over. His fingers left the towel for a moment and dragged up my skin, brushing against my pussy in a scorching caress, and then he went back to drying my legs. Teasing me.
“Good girl,” he muttered low in his throat before tapping my ass with his towel-covered hand. “Turn.”
I turned, feeling exposed before him. The towel started up my legs and this time spent a lot more time “drying” my slit.
“It’s the strangest thing,” Cayden muttered, his face level with my core. “Every time I dry this spot…” He reached out a finger and placed it on my folds, sliding it up and down the opening. “…it just gets wet again straight away. I wonder why that is?”
His finger circled my clit, and I jerked, holding on to his shoulders as he slowly caressed my pussy.
“See, there we go…wet again. How can we fix this?” His eyes glinted with desire, a hunger that made me weak in the knees. Playful Cayden was something else entirely.
“Maybe use your mouth to dry it,” I suggested softly, a furious blush coating my cheeks.
Fuck, had I really just said that? Me, Lily Williams, the coach’s daughter? If it was anyone else kneeling before me, his face level with my cunt, I’d have burned up with shame, but not with Cayden. He was my first everything, but I had all of his firsts, too. I was completely myself, awkward, inexperienced, and horny as hell with the guy, and there was no embarrassment, only acceptance. Was that normal in a relationship? No. My inner voice spoke immediately, but I pushed it away. We aren’t in a relationship, I reminded myself harshly. Get a grip, Lily, and enjoy this for what it is, while you can.
He grinned and leaned in, yanking one of my legs onto his shoulder. Before I could worry about his wounds or how heavy I was leaning against him, his face was right there, his tongue pressing against my clit. His hand reached around behind me, and two fingers slipped inside my entrance. He pumped them steadily in and out as his tongue circled my clit, pulling it into his mouth, rubbing his tongue against it ruthlessly. I held on to his head, my body threatening to fold in as he ravaged me. The only thing holding me up was my grip on his hair and the counter behind me.
I came quickly. He gave me no way to avoid it. It was like his body had learned exactly where to touch mine, how hard, how fast, and how long, and now, I was an instrument he could play with expertise. I cried out, shoving a fist into my mouth to silence myself as I came. What if my parents heard? While I was drifting on a sea of post-orgasm glow, Cayden stood and pressed me back against the counter, kissing me hard. I tasted myself on his tongue as he swirled it against mine.
“I don’t think that worked, Freckles. I think I’ll have to use something else,” he teased, returning to our game.
He grabbed my hand and placed it over his cock. His hard-on was impressive, tenting his silky gym shorts, pushing insistently against my palm. I gripped him over his clothes, cupping the head and squeezing.
“Hmm, I think so, too, but first, we need to fix the dressing on your side…it’s come off,” I noted, eyeing the hanging white square of gauze.
“Hmmm, has anyone ever told you how sexy you are when you’re playing nurse?” he muttered as I pumped his hard-on a few more times through his shorts.
God, he was hot as hell, and I couldn’t stop touching him.
I laughed and shook my head. “Considering the only things I’ve ever played nurse to are animals, that would be a no.”
“Are you really going to leave?” His next question caught me off guard. We went from playful and close, to sudden, jagged tension.
My hand loosened on him, and I looked up and caught his blue gaze. So, he had heard my dad’s comment this morning about California.
“What? Where is that coming from?”
“I need to know. It sounds like your parents are cool with it…so does that mean you’re really going? You really won’t be at HHU?”
I swallowed the sharp pain that blossomed in my gut at the thought.
“Disappointed? You’ll have to find someone else to torment.” I was going for teasing, but it wasn’t turning out that way at all.
After everything that had happened between us, I couldn’t pretend that Cayden and I were anything ordinary. Whatever was between us at this point could only ever be rare and special. We weren’t only each other’s firsts, but I’d seen the guy drop to his knees and write a word into his skin for me. He’d never be just a normal person to me, and I suspected that I couldn’t be that to him either. I wasn’t sure where that left us.
“When were you going to tell me?” he wondered.
“You already knew. You knew first, remember?”
“I thought your dad would stop you. I thought you parents finding out would kill it dead and you’d be going to HHU instead.”
“Really?”
“Really. Why else did you think I told him?” Cayden said the last words without remorse.
I stared at him. There was so much to unpack in that sentence, I didn’t even know where to start.
“You told him? You mean you put my journal out there, and he read it,” I clarified.
Cayden shook his head. “He wasn’t getting it. He never read the journal, so… I told him,” he confessed.
“You dickhead,” I protested after a moment and pushed at his chest.
He didn’t budge even an inch but simply nodded, agreeing with me.
“Why would you do that? You wanted to mess up my future that badly?”
He nodded again. “Yes. I wanted to mess up your future and keep you here. I wanted you to be stuck with attending HHU for the next four years.”
Something about his look stole my breath. “Because you were mad at me? You wanted to bully me all through college?”
He shook his head slowly.
“Then why?”
He took a second to answer. “I pretended it was because I was mad at you. I tried to make myself believe it, but that’s not the reason.”
My mouth was drier than hell right now, my voice only a croak. “It’s not?”
He shook his head again.
“Then why?”
His strong jaw clenched as he loomed over me, battling with himself about what to say. After a long moment, he let out a hard breath. “Because I just wanted you. The thought of you leaving made me livid.” He tucked my hair behind my ear. “I want you to forgive me, Freckles. I want us to start over. I want you to let me back in.”
“What?” I was shocked by his words.
He leaned in. “I want you to trust me again. I want you to sneak into my bed every single night, and write me stories to act out in your journal. I want you to stay here and go to HHU instead of leaving for California…I want you, all of you, every single bit. I just want you, and I can’t think of anything else.”
His words blanked my brain. I stared at him until I could speak again, and he waited for me.
“What? So now you have proof that Josh—”
“I don’t care about that fucker. I wanted you before I knew it was Josh who leaked the article. I wanted you when I was furious at you. I wanted you when I thought you’d broken my heart. I don’t think I’ll ever stop. I don’t think I’m capable of that.”
I had no reply. There were no pithy comebacks or accusations I could make right now. I had no teasing jokes or ways to lighten the tension between us. I could only stare.
“Since we’re being honest with each other, you should know that I intend to change your mind about leaving, however I can. Love like ours isn’t something ordinary, and I’ll fight for it. You should be ready for that,” he finished and then finally took a step back, giving me space to breathe.
Love?
“What does that mean? Are you declaring war on me again?” My heart was in my throat, yet it felt light for the first time in a while. His words were turning me inside out, and I could barely help the smile that blossomed on my lips.
“I guess so,” he confirmed, but then quickly shifted gears. “You wanted to change my dressing?” he prompted after a moment of me staring dumbly at him.
“Oh, right,” I said faintly, trying desperately to get my head to work again. Cayden had just thrown down the gauntlet, and I had no idea whether I wanted him to win or lose.