Ashes to Ashes

I’M WAITING IN LILLIA’S BEDROOM FOR HER TO come home from the dinner celebration with Reeve. I watched him all day from a safe distance, playing around in the pool with Lillia, saying “I love you,” trying so hard to impress her family at their special dinner.

I could have stopped it at any time. Crushed his perfect day. I wanted to so badly.

But then I thought, Why? Let him have it. That way it’ll hurt all the worse when I take everything away. I’ll be so much stronger, and way more powerful, if I wait a little longer.

Tomorrow. That’s it. Tomorrow’s going to be hell on earth. My day of reckoning.

I’ve been in Lillia’s room before, but tonight I really take time to look around. Lillia has so many pretty things on her vanity. Bottles of lotion and tubes of lipstick and a pink hairbrush from France, plus a big glass jar where she keeps her hair ribbons. Her closet is like you see in a fancy boutique—stacks of cashmere sweaters, rows of blouses and skirts and dresses, everything arranged by color, from light to dark. Even though I’ve hardly seen Lillia wear the same outfit twice, so many of them still have the tags on. There’s one dress hanging on a special puffy hanger, and it’s cloaked in plastic. I know as soon as I see it that it’s her prom dress.

Lillia gets everything she wants. The boy, the college acceptance letter. She has a dream life. But not tonight. I’m going to ruin her dreams tonight.

I walk toward her dresser. Her necklaces hang on a silver tree, but she also has a jewelry box. There’s a picture frame with a photo of a young Lillia and Nadia riding on the same merry-go-round horse. They both have their hair in pigtails, and Lillia is hugging Nadia so tight it looks uncomfortable.

I hear the family come home. Not one but two sets of footsteps hurry up the stairs. So I dart behind the chaise.

Lillia comes in first. Her dad calls out, “Good night, college girl!” and she calls back, “Night, Daddy!”

Nadia comes in right behind her. She flops down on Lillia’s bed as Lillia unzips herself out of her dress and slips on a soft gray nightie.

Lillia carefully takes off the necklace Reeve gave her this afternoon, hangs it on the necklace tree, and then takes a seat at her vanity and asks, “So, what do you think? Did Daddy approve?” She pulls open a drawer and takes out a couple of cotton balls.

“Are you kidding?” Nadia says. “I think Daddy loved him. That Korean culture stuff, Daddy ate it up! Reeve was so smart to do that.”

Lillia smiles into the mirror. “I feel bad. I basically scared Reeve into his best behavior. I was so sure he’d do something . . . I don’t know. Something that Daddy wouldn’t like.”

I shake my head. Reeve knows how to charm everyone. That’s part of why he’s so dangerous. It can happen, even when you don’t want it to. Even when you are trying your very hardest to resist. Lillia should know that better than anyone else. She’s known him for years. She’s seen the way he treats people. And yet she doesn’t recognize it. She refuses to see his true colors.

Nadia rolls onto her stomach and watches Lillia remove her makeup. It’s clear Nadia adores Lillia. After a while Nadia says, “Lilli.” She’s trembling. “I’m sorry I was so terrible to you.”

Lillia turns around in her chair. “Nadi, don’t even.”

But Nadia has started to cry. She smothers her face in the comforter.

Lillia immediately gets up and lies on the bed with Nadia and strokes her hair. “It’s fine, okay? I understand why. You were upset. You loved Rennie a lot. We both did.”

“Still. That’s not what sisters do.” She sniffles some, but it only makes the tears run harder. “And now you’ll be going away to college, and I won’t ever see you, and . . . and . . .” Her face wrinkles up like a baby’s. “I’m going to miss you so much.”

Lillia shushes Nadia, and lies down next to her, comfy-cozy. “I’ll miss you too, Nadi,” she whispers. “But I’m not going away forever! I’ll come home a lot, or you can come and visit me. We’ll go shopping, and eat at the food trucks. Boston’s not that far away.” She reaches over to her nightstand and plucks out a tissue for Nadia. “I don’t know what you’re so sad about, anyway. You’re going to have Phantom all to yourself now.”

Nadia laughs, but she’s still sniffly. Lillia pulls her blankets up over them, reaches for her TV remote, clicks something on, and the two lie in bed together. As snug as two bugs in a rug.

Lillia falls asleep first, and Nadia nods off a few minute after. I slide up next to Lillia and place my hand on her forehead.

Lillia puts on her daisy bikini and walks out to their backyard pool with a drink and her towel. Nadia and her friends are there, swimming and suntanning. Lillia leans back in her lounge chair and closes her eyes, as peaceful as can be. Finally Reeve arrives in his swimming trunks.

Lillia’s dreaming about today. She’s trying to relive it all over again.

That’s not going to happen.

There’s a splash, and Lillia opens her eyes, confused. This isn’t how it went. Reeve should be scooping her up, jumping into the water with her.

She looks around. Nadia and her friends are gone. And Reeve’s already in the pool.

With me.

Lillia screams a bloodcurdling scream. “Mary, no!”

I’ve got my hand on Reeve’s head, holding it below the surface. It doesn’t matter that he’s got the body of a Greek god. His strength is no match for me.

Her hands fly to her mouth, her eyes wide and terrified. She darts toward the pool edge, but I make the pool stretch wider with every step closer she takes, so she never makes up any ground. She can’t get close to us. “Please stop!”

“You’ve been a crappy friend to me, Lillia. You broke our pact, you forgot about me, and you fell in love with the one person you shouldn’t have.”

She touches the necklace, her mouth agape. Then she runs to the diving board and falls onto her stomach. She’s reaching out, trying desperately to get a hand on Reeve. “Mary, please! He’ll drown!”

“Yes, he will. When Reeve dies tomorrow, remember that I’m the one who killed him.”

I lift my hand from her forehead.

See you tomorrow, Lillia.