Aliens Moved My Cheese

A recent poll by the Huffington Post suggested that 48% of all American believe in the existence of UFO’s. I’m really unimpressed by that particular statistic. It doesn’t really matter what people believe. It only matters what can be legitimately proven. If seven billion people believe in something ridiculous without conclusive evidence, does that make that supposition true? If on the flipside of that argument, if only one person believes in the truth and seven billion people do not, does that invalidate the truth? What people blindly believe in is inconsequential to the entire argument/debate. This is especially the case when you consider the vast number of gullible and/or stupid people currently living on planet earth. Only a thousand years ago the majority of people living on earth believed that the earth was flat. The Holy Bible even suggested the earth was flat. I’m here to tell you the earth is not flat. That is a complete certainty. Yet we still have a small collection of imbeciles in modern times, who disregard all scientific evidence to the contrary called “Flat Earth Theorists.” I don’t want to be misquoted here and give Ufologists the idea that I believe UFO’s don’t exist. I am of the “I simply don’t know” school of thought. There is a literal mountain of evidence suggesting UFO’s do exist. However, the vast majority of said evidence is in fact easily debunked or shown to be easily falsifiable. The proliferation of UFO hoaxes are so profound that the validity of legitimate researchers is often called into question. This makes it hard to see the forest for the trees so to speak. The lunatics in this field of study far outnumber those engaged in serious investigations. If you see a meme on say YouTube or Google that claims to offer conclusive evidence of UFO visitation 99 times out of 100 they are fabricated bullshit. That leaves the rest of us wading through a veritable morass of pseudo-scientific unsupported nonsense as opposed to analyzing unexplained phenomena from a purely scientific stand point. I am a rational logical human being with excellent critical thinking skills and I admit I just don’t know for sure what the fuck is going on. When you consider the fact that 48% of Americans believe in the existence of UFO’s also take into account how many of those people have any idea what they are talking about beyond watching the occasional “Ancient Aliens” episode.

In psychological terms a large number of people blindly believing in the validity of strange unproven shit is often referred to as the “madness of crowds.” When you get a shitload of people together they act in a very different manner than they would individually. They are in most cases willing to believe in anything a large group says with enough conviction regardless of evidence supporting their claims. We see this phenomena all through ought history in relation to religious belief. In the modern era we see the same type of behavior in relation to pseudo-scientific beliefs masquerading as pure science. At the start of the internet we assumed that it would be an amazing tool for spreading knowledge and learning. It has more often than not become the vehicle of morons and lunatics used to spread misinformation and ignorance. I pretty sure Al Gore did not have this in mind. A smart five year old could Photoshop and fake UFO photos if they really set their mind to it. I’ve done precisely that and convinced grown ups that I had a legitimate photo of a UFO just to prove my point. Just for future reference: I superimposed a clip of an alleged spacecraft from the movie “Aliens” over a photo of a beautiful blue sky and it was convincing enough for 30+ people in a twelve hour period to announce I had the real thing. I then went on to tell these fools that the craft landed and I talked to the aliens. They took me at my word. I made the whole thing up! I later told these people it was a fake and precisely how I did it. A handful of them didn’t believe I had lied to them. That’s how desperately they wanted to believe. One guy claimed I was a “government shill paid to spread misinformation.” I wish I worked for the government in that capacity because that would be the easiest income I ever made. Ufology could potentially become as valid and as recognized a science as say chemistry or biology. All that is needed to accomplish this is for the lunatic fringe to just shut the fuck up and leave the research to the experts. In ancient Greece myths about their God’s were around for thousands of years. The average Greek peasant believed these myths were true. The rich, the nobles and the educated for the most part did not. They simply found the myths a useful tool in achieving greater power over the gullible poor. Modern myths get perpetuated for a different reason. People want to think that they know something as a certainty that many others do not. Rather than achieving this goal through actual study, these mentally lazy halfwits latch on to any outlandish tale and embellish it with each retelling of the story. That is why 48% of people in the USA believe we are being visited by UFO’s. They see TV shows, blogs and memes discussing this topic all over the internet. If all these sources of information are telling you alien visitations are factual and you are too lazy to look into legitimate sources of information then even intelligent albeit mentally lazy people will start to believe UFO phenomena are true without the benefit of actually seeing a UFO or meeting aliens. I can say Zeus came down from Olympus and told me who should run for president but that doesn’t make that bullshit a fact. Publishing magnet William Randolph Hurst pioneered the American version of yellow journalism. He would outright lie as he saw fit and because that information was printed in his many newspapers many people would believe what they read. The modern equivalent is Fox News and the internet. If you want to find out about UFO’s great. I find this stuff fascinating myself. Just understand that these sources of data don’t come with warning labels that say “this site is crap” or “this site is legitimate.“ Take what you see or hear with a grain of salt. Every American is entitled to an opinion. It doesn’t matter how retarded and off base I find said opinion. Just because you have the right to talk out of your ass does not mean you should automatically exercise that right. “Let me ass you a question…” -Ace Ventura Pet Detective.