Chapter The Forgotten Pain
“Stein!!!”
Stein stifled and waved off the person shaking him.
“Wake up!!!!”
He forced his eyes open even though his body was telling him not to. His eyes were still blurry from the light, so he wasn’t able to distinguish anything as of the moment. All he could tell was that before him was a familiar figure who had white hair and ocean blue eyes, “Grim...?” He guessed.
Grim let out a husky chuckle, “YEP! Hahaha! You were out for a long time buddy!!” He said as he helped assist Stein in sitting up. He grinned like a naughty old man as he did so.
Stein raised a brow in confusion, “And you are grinning because..?”
Grim propped his hands on his hips, making him a lot bigger, “You are very lucky!” He shouted in glee. He ran across the room then got an album, “You’re still asleep and I have no idea when you’ll gain consciousness again, but I’ll just show you this!!” He shoved an album on Stein’s face. Grim looked proud for some reason unknown. He slightly put down the album to meet Stein’s eyes, “It’s your timeline album!!” He proclaimed.
“I don’t remember anything regarding a timeline album...” Stein replied.
“That’s because I made it while you were out!” Stein proudly said as he grinned wider. He scanned through the pages as he continued his statements, “You see... I keep wondering what you do while you’re out, so I did this out of boredom.” Grim showed a page of the album. It was Grim being young and wrinkle-free and Stein being him—no changes whatsoever. Grim chuckled in a good manner, “Hahaha! I remember calling you my son! You hypnotized me at some point, right?” His joyful tone dropped in that instant, “Haah... I was the face of the supervisor while you were the actual one...”
Stein just watched Grim say the words he wanted to say. He knows that the door to the next realm is always open for Grim. Stein grabbed the album, curious of its contents, “That’s because no one would approve of a supervisor who doesn’t change.” He said as he saw that one page that gave him the first trauma of his life. He traced the figures with his finger as he suddenly went quiet.
Grim noticed the silence then looked at the picture.
It was the heart transfer.
They failed to finish it because Grim was already in the verge of death. But that was the time when Stein first understood the pain of losing an individual. They spread the word to keep the people from judging that Stein was Grim’s creation. That Stein wouldn’t age and that he was to look after this realm for eternity starting that day.
None of them knew that it was all made up.
All except for the two of them.
Stein looked at Grim, “It’s funny that you’re still here though.” He monotonously said.
Grim shrugged off that remark, “That’s because I chose to stay!” He flailed his arms in the air to prove his point, “I know that the door over there is the door to the next realm! And I also know that you sleep just to wake up in the actual realm alone!” Grim went to the door then pointed at it, “I-I know that if I open this, I can never come back!” He started to pace back and forth, “The life span in this realm is more or less a thousand years! People won’t be here until then!” He exclaimed. Grim shot a concerned look at Stein, “TELL ME! Are you fine with seeing someone appear in your house then just let them leave like that?!”
Grim was so unsure of the gestures he wanted to show, “I-I was here the moment I DIED! And did you remember what you wanted me to do?!” He shouted as he pointed a finger right at Stein’s face, “You wanted me to leave! You didn’t even ask for company!” Stein was just about to say something in defence but Grim continued to speak, “I knew exactly what you felt that day! You had a heart for that brief moment! You wanted me to stay but you just wanted me to leave that instant!” He let out a long sigh, “I am aware that you wanted to forget about it.”
“You are saying that you are an epitome of conscience.” Stein said.
“Conscience, pain and sadness my friend!” Grim corrected.
Stein shook his head in denial of the thought, “Just conscience, Grim. Just conscience.” He looked back at Grim with uneasy eyes, “Someone else holds pain and sadness...” A red string slowly appeared on Stein’s chest.
Grim pointed at the string to which Stein instantly reacted to.
“Someone gave you a heart.”
Stein managed to pull a sad smile. Grim held back a gasp as he saw an emotion linger in Stein’s features, “You... you have facial emotions now...”
Stein weakly chuckled, “I find it hard to believe myself...” He grasped his aching chest as he shut his eyes tight, “I’m supposed to be happy not the other way around...”
“Is anyone here..?” A familiar voice said.
It was as though someone dropped a bomb, Stein fell on his knees. Company in his house meant the death of someone outside. He covered his ears and pretended that he didn’t hear anyone.
Grim was concerned for his friend because he knows that this would be Stein’s first time dealing with emotions. Curious, Grim went to the basement. He looked around to find the owner of the voice. At the corner, he saw someone move. He went to that corner and saw a petite lady. Her skin was pale as though all blood had been drained out of her. Her hair was mixtures of white and purple. She looked like she had been crying for quite a while.
Grim extended a hand at the dazed lady, “How long have you been here, little miss?”
She looked up, “Grim..?”
Said person grinned, “Oh! You know my name! This is nice!” He exclaimed as he helped the lady to move. He gently pulled along the tired lady, “The owner is a little...” Grim made a thinking face, “... a little troubled, I should say.”
“Where’s Stein..?” She said, earning a questioning look from Grim. Noticing, she further added, “This is his house right..?”
By then, Grim realized that this lady was a significant existence for Stein. His eyes dilated in shock as he saw the veins that were visible on the lady’s chest. He stared at it for a good while then redirected his eyes back to the little lady. He was left speechless for a good few seconds as he let reality sink in to his mind.
“Y... You are...” Grim muttered out.
“Risette.” She said. She started to move this time dragging Grim in the process. She looked around to find the stairs up. She looked tired yet refreshed for some reason Grim couldn’t point out, “I want to ask something...” She started.
“?”
“Stein... Stein was crying when I last saw him...” She quietly said as they proceeded up the stairs. She looked back at the old man who was intently listening to her every word, “I want to know if it actually happened.”
Grim remained quiet, unable to find the right words.
They just proceeded in silence as they made their way up to the main floor. The moment they got to the main floor, Risette dashed to the work desk. She looked around to find something. She opened the drawer, closed it since it wasn’t there. Then she went to the other drawer and found the sketch book. She flipped it open then found nothing in it.
She looked at Grim for some answers but Grim himself couldn’t think of an answer since he doesn’t even know what the little miss was asking for. With a sigh, she just headed to the entrance and tried to go out.
Upon catching the intent of the little miss, Grim grabbed her by the arm and shook his head saying not to go. He dragged Risette away from the door then let her sit on one of the couches by the living room. Grim went to the kitchen then made her something to drink. After that, he went back to the living room and gave her the drink.
“Where’s Stein..?”
Grim shook his head, “I’m sorry but I don’t know...”
Risette just shrugged then drank her tea. Everything was too quiet. She couldn’t even bare to breath at the given situation. It was as though there was something wrong and she couldn’t put a finger on it.
The tea cup fell and shattered to pieces.
Grim sighed as he picked up the broken shards, “My...my...” He said as Risette suddenly vanished before him.
~o0o0o~
Stein woke up with a start. He gripped his chest as he felt his racing heart—
Racing heart. He definitely felt thumping and beating in his chest. He had a heart? He looked around to see his surroundings. He saw Luke and two more unfamiliar figures. He then directed his eyes to the white dragon throwing a tantrum.
“Stein!!” Luke shouted, “Stein what happened?!” He said, panicking as Stein wasn’t properly responding to Luke. He gripped Stein’s shoulders, “STEIN!”
By then, Stein finally fixed his eyes on the worried Luke, “The—The dragon...” he breathed out as he removed Luke’s grip. He stood then headed to the dragon.
“Don’t go there Stein!” Luke reprimanded, “It’s chaos out there!”
Stein shook his head, “There’s no chaos out there.” He said, without looking back. He tilted his head slightly to the side to show a part of his face, “It’s all misunderstanding.” With that, he left Luke speechless.
Stein headed to the dragon. Lisa spotted Stein then landed to block his way, “You just woke up, Stein. There’s no way I’m letting you fight.”
Everything fell deaf in Stein’s ears as he gently nudged Lisa aside then continued his way to the dragon. Lisa managed to catch a glimpse of the fading red string by Stein’s chest. She followed the string and saw that it was attached to the dragon’s chest. Realization strikes her light thunder and lightning. Lisa paced to match Stein’s footsteps, “Please don’t tell me.”
“Yes. That’s Risette.” Stein curtly said as he paced faster towards the dragon. Lisa was left speechless as well as she gradually stopped on her tracks and watched Stein’s retreating figure.
Lisa commanded her minions to stand down. She suddenly felt weak as she decided to go to the shelter.
Stein disregarded the dangerous factors that may cause harm to him. All he could here at the time was the fact that the dragon’s roars were attempts of calling for help. The other people mistook the roars for hostile actions. He knows because he can hear Risette’s voice in the dragon’s roar.
It was filled with fear, agony, and despair. He knew because it was the same as the screech earlier before. He watched the red string between them get shorter as their proximity got closer. He felt his being sink into darkness.
He was anxious for some reason. His heart was beating so hard and it wasn’t even the beats for love but the beats for something else. He was beginning to shake. It was fear but he didn’t know that he was experiencing fear of the unknown.
It was similar to expecting the unexpected but he was just not so sure if it really was the case. As he was finally in front of the dragon, Stein shakily took in a large amount of air then slowly exhaled it. He closed his eyes then bit his lip. He felt something well up inside of him. He touched the scaly skin of the dragon.
As if on cue, the dragon stopped its cries for help. It stopped then stooped down at Stein’s level. It let out a broken whimper.
Like a strong gust of wind, Stein knew the next events. He stared into the dragon’s eyes then shook his head slowly but defiantly, “Please...”
The dragon just whimpered once more in replied.
Stein closed his eyes as he felt the face of the dragon, “I’m begging you...”
The dragon’s skin evaporated to Stein’s touch. The scales surrounding the dragon slowly resided as Stein continued to touch it. The dragon grew smaller and smaller until it had a certain person’s height. Stein let out a brief relieved smile as he saw the person he was looking for. He slid his hand to feel her skin. He can feel the veins around her face. It wasn’t a good sign but he was relieved for that short instant.
Risette responded by touching the hand by her cheeks. She let out a weak smile as she felt the concern of the other person. She was turning cold and she knew that she had a few minutes to live before the end. She gingerly felt the warm hands engulfing her, “Stein... you’re so warm..!” She said then recalled the past that held the same conversation. She felt like she was watering up as she said the next line, “Why are you warm..?” She said as her tone quivered under intense emotion.
Stein remembered the conversation but it was supposed to be the other way around. He remembers asking that question. Now he knows the reason. He engulfed Risette into a tight hug. Reality had struck him harder than anything in this world. He tightened his hug on the girl as though saying ‘don’t go’. Stein was also shaking under intense emotion. His vision went blurry, “I don’t know...”
“Stein...” Risette murmured as she returned the hug even though it wasn’t as tight as Stein’s hug. She held on to Stein’s clothing as though she didn’t want to let go, “It’s so cold..!”
“Don’t say anything!” Stein strictly reprimanded.
Risette had to take note of the strange tone. Stein was finally responding with appropriate tones and gestures. She weakly giggled, “... I really like you.”
Stein shook his head, “Please don’t say it like it’s goodbye!”
The little lady closed her eyes and let the tears flow out, “I can’t..!” She let her tears drop to Stein’s clothes, “I can’t!”
“PLEASE!”
Risette shook her head to reject Stein’s wish. She regretted the fact that she couldn’t stay. She regretted that she was going away. She regretted that this was the last time. She unconsciously started to cry out loud, “I WANT TO STAY, STEIN!!” Upon knowing that she shouted her wished, she lowered her voice back to a whisper, “I want to! But I can’t..!”
They parted from the hug. Risette saw the pained look on Stein. She forced out a smile, “I wanted—” She wanted to look happy in front of Stein but her happy bravado was immediately broken back to a grieving frown, “I wanted to spend more time with you!!”
Stein was already crying as he kept shaking his head, hoping that Risette would be convinced to stay, “I can always give you back your heart, so please stay..!”
Risette once again shook her head in rejection of the idea, “My heart won’t accept it. I won’t be able to accept it...” She wiped her tears then coughed a bit. She looked at her feet.
They were starting to fade away. She shot a look at Stein who was already panicking the moment he saw she was starting to fade away, “Stein...” She said in a broken tone. She was already quivering, “I... I need to go...”
Stein wasn’t able to give any respond other than “Don’t go...”
Risette forced out a good mannered smile, “Please don’t make it hard for me, Stein...” She fell weak on her knees. Luckily, Stein was there to catch her fall. Risette grabbed on to Stein’s clothes for support since her other foot was slowly diminishing, “It’s already hard for me to accept that I’m leaving..!” She said as her voice quivered. She buried her face on Stein’s shoulder, “Just smile for me...! Otherwise I’ll leave with regrets..!” She pleaded as she wiped away Stein’s tears.
It was a futile effort as new tears kept forming for Stein.
“Stein..! Smile..!” Risette practically begged. Veins were finally evident around her face and body. Her complexion was slowly draining to white. She forced out a smile, “You have everything there is..! There is everything you want..!” She weakly chuckled then coughed out blood, “I’m the one who lost everything! I’m the one who lost a life! I’m the one who’s supposed to be crying so badly!”
Stein rejected the idea as he caressed Risette’s hair, “I don’t have anything!” He clenched his chest as he felt a heavy twinge in his heart. It was a strange pain that lingered longer than any physical pain he had felt. Tears poured harder, “I—You!...” He fell on his knees with Risette in his arms. His eyes managed to catch a glance at Risette’s other foot that was slowly diminishing as well, “I LOST EVERYTHING RISETTE!” He shouted.
Risette broke down as she heard those words
“You say I have everything... But I tell you... there is one missing.” Stein whispered at Risette’s ear. He cried harder upon seeing that some parts of her body were starting to fade away, “I am crying... because I know I’m going to be left alone..!” He dearly held Risette every so close to him. He was so gentle at the time, “I found you...” He begrudgingly said then bitterly whispered the rest, “But who’s going to find me..?”
“I will find you!” Risette said as she tightened her grip around Stein, “I think that’s the reason why another realm exists..!” she said, “I’ll wait for you there! For as long as it takes! I WILL!” She said with smile as her body was starting to fade away.
“RISETTE!”
“Smile...”
Stein held back a frown then forced a smile as tears continued to flow non-stop, “Can I count on that..?”
Risette smiled as she completely faded away.
“Yes...”
The rocky debris turned into a flower field in a heartbeat. The sky that was filled with gloomy clouds was turned into a clear sunset sky. The winds gently blew as though to say that everything was back to normal. Leaves and flower petals got carried away by the winds.
In the middle of the field lay Stein grabbing on to something that used to be there. The winds helped cover Stein’s expression as he stood still in his position. He clenched his chest in hopes of having to ease the pain. He stared at the ground as though it was the most interesting thing in the world. Tears seized to flow as there is nothing left to release. He felt empty even though he already had what he wished for. He forced out a smile.
"I never knew pain could hurt this much..." He muttered. "It clenches ever-so-tightly in my chest..."
"It must be nice to feel the warmth. It must be nice to feel the love. It must also be nice if I got to feel a kiss..." He suddenly covered his face, "I'm so sorry but you'll be my first and last..."
"If there was something I regret..." He said to himself. A part of him was convinced that he was actually talking to the piles of non-existent bones and ashes that lied inside the clothing and chest armor that Risette left.
He bitterly smiled at the remains in front of him, "It would be having this heart that was rightfully yours!" He quivered.