Refuge: Chapter 12
“WHO IS READY for a walk?”
Hugo and Woolf began to whine and run in circles when I unlocked their gate. In their excitement, they looked so much like dogs that I let out a laugh. When the door slid open, they plunked their behinds on the floor as I’d trained them to do whenever I entered their cage. Instead of stepping inside as I always did, I pointed at my feet and said, “Come.” The hounds looked confused, so I issued the command again. This time they stood and sauntered toward me, and when they realized they were leaving their cage, their tails began to wag and their mouths opened wide in doggie grins.
“They look like they are about to eat someone,” Sahir said over the security intercom from the safety of his office.
I rolled my eyes at the closest camera. “They can’t help how they look.” With their enormous teeth and red-black eyes, the hellhounds did look anything but harmless, but looks were deceiving. Everyone thought trolls were bloodthirsty creatures, but I’d been friends with Remy for ten years and he was one of the gentlest people I had ever met.
“Tristan had everyone clear away from this area as a precaution, so you are good to go.”
“Thanks. Come on, boys.” I walked to the exit, and the hounds followed at my heels until I threw open the door and stepped outside into the sunshine. I looked back to find them watching me uncertainly, and I tapped my thigh. “Let’s go.”
It was all the urging they needed, and I was almost bowled over when they leapt toward me eagerly. They circled me and pushed against me, unable to believe they were free, and I let them have a few minutes of play before I ordered them to stand on either side of me like we had practiced. When we set off across the lawn toward the woods, I was aware of the people watching us from the windows of the main building and I resisted the urge to look at them. Word of the hellhounds had finally spread. Now everyone was watching to see how this would play out, and I was sure that more than one of them expected a bad outcome. We’d show them.
Despite my determination to prove everyone wrong, it felt good to walk under the canopy of trees and escape the curious stares. Once we were out of sight of the building, I broke into a jog and whistled for the hounds to follow me. It felt amazing to run free, and I enjoyed it as much as they did. For such large animals, they weaved through trees and leapt over large rocks with incredible ease, running ahead of me and circling back when I lagged behind. Once Hugo caught the scent of a fox and set after it, braying like a bloodhound and scaring every creature within a mile. Luckily, the fox escaped. I did not like to see an animal hurt, but I also didn’t want to deny the hounds the joy of hunting. They were predators after all, and hunting was a part of their nature.
I had no trouble finding the lake, and I ran down to the rocky shore with the hounds at my heels. They lapped nosily at the cold water, sending ripples across the mirror-like surface. When they were done, they looked at me and began to sniff along the shore. “Don’t go too far,” I told them, pretty sure they wouldn’t let me out of their sights. I let them explore, and I found a dry flat area to lie back on and soak up the sun. The woods were unusually hushed as the birds and small animals hid from the larger threat invading their territory. I missed their calls and scurrying, but it was still very peaceful here.
I had almost dozed off when it struck me that I could no longer hear the hounds moving about. Sitting up, I scanned the shore until I found them a few hundred yards away, sitting side-by-side and staring out over the lake. I whistled but neither of them moved or even looked in my direction. Strange. They rarely liked to sit still, even when I commanded them to do it, and I couldn’t believe they would do it now with so many things to explore. Unease stole over me, and I got to my feet. Something was not right.
“They are quite safe and content,” said a musical voice behind me, and I whirled to face a barefoot red-haired girl in a flowing yellow dress. My mouth fell open, and a smile lit up her angelic face. “Hello, little sister.”
“Aine!” I ran the short distance between us and threw my arms around my sylph friend. She laughed softly and hugged me, enveloping me in the incredibly alluring scent of Faerie she carried with her. If you spend any amount of time in that place, its sweet perfume begins to cling to you, something I discovered after my own stay there. The first thing Roland and Peter had said to me when they saw me again was that I smelled like sunshine and something else that even their sharp werewolf noses couldn’t identify.
“Sara, it is good to see you, too. You have been making new friends since I last saw you.”
I pulled away laughing, still unable to believe she was here. I looked behind me at the hellhounds that were as still as statues. “Are they asleep?”
“They are in a waking dream. In their minds, they are running through the forest, chasing deer. They are quite happy, I assure you.” Her eyes twinkled mischievously. “And as for the two red-haired warriors who followed you, they have momentarily forgotten their mission and are guarding the woods as they always do.”
“Seamus and Niall followed me?” I should have known Tristan wouldn’t let me come out here alone even with two hellhounds to protect me. “They are okay though, right?”
“I have not altered them in any way, and they will remember you again once I lift my magic.”
“Okay.” I faced her again. “I missed you. I wasn’t sure when you would come to see me again.”
She smiled and took my hand to lead me over to sit on the grassy bank. “I am sorry. Our kind do not interfere much in the human world anymore. But I am here now, and I want to hear all about you. Are you happy here?”
“It’s a lot to get used to, but I’m trying. The people are nice and I have family here. I miss Nate and my friends, but we talk all the time and it’s getting easier.”
“I am pleased to hear that. Coming to live with your people was the right decision, but I worried that you would not be happy.”
I plucked a blade of grass and twisted it around my thumb. “It’s certainly not how I expected my life would be. I always thought I would graduate school with my friends and go to college and all that. It’s hard letting go of that life, but I’m starting to see the good things in this one, too.”
Aine laid a slender arm around my shoulders and gave me a squeeze. “Sometimes it is difficult to see the goodness in your life when you are in turmoil. Just remember that even during a storm, the sun is shining. You may not see it, but it is always there above the clouds, waiting to warm you again.”
I cocked an eyebrow at her. “Is that some Faerie proverb?”
Her laugh made me think of wind chimes. “Just some sisterly wisdom. Now tell me about your magic. I can feel that it has grown since we last parted.”
I’d been longing to see Aine for weeks to ask her about my new ability. Telling her about it now was like lifting a huge weight from my shoulders. She listened intently as I described the strange power surges and my experiences with the demons. She nodded in approval when I told her about my earlier training with Nikolas.
A smile broke over her face when I finished. “This is exciting and wonderful news, sister! Your elemental magic is growing, which I suspected it would. Do not fear this. It is a good thing.”
I almost slumped in relief. “Why is it suddenly acting up now? Did being in Seelie trigger something in me?”
“That is part of it, but it has accelerated because of the demons. You are surrounded by them here, and even though they reside inside a host, their nearness is causing your magic to emerge. The more contact you have with demons, the more your power will grow.”
I stared at her in alarm. “What does that mean? My power already killed one demon, and it would have hurt Nikolas if I hadn’t stopped it. I don’t want to hurt any of the Mohiri. And what about my own demon? Will my power kill it, too?” There had been a time when I would have been happy to be free of the beast in my head, but I didn’t feel that way anymore. I felt a swell of protectiveness for my Mori.
Aine’s red curls bounced when she gave a delicate shake of her head. “I have not met another like you, so I honestly cannot say what will happen. But I do believe that being half Mohiri, you pose no real danger to your people. As for your own demon, it has lived with your Fae magic its whole life so it may be safe. Only time will tell.”
Her words did not give me the assurance I was looking for. “Nikolas said those other demons were in their true forms so my power affected them more. But I healed an imp last year when it got caught in a mouse trap, and it didn’t flip out when it got near me.”
“Your power was very weak then, but it has grown a lot since I last saw you. You would not be able to touch one of them now without killing it, until you learn to control your power.”
“So I’ll be able to control it and only use it when I want to?”
“Yes.”
“I’m so glad to hear that.” I would have to be very careful with the imps until it was safe to go near them. Maybe I should find them a new home. They wouldn’t like it, but it wasn’t like they would be happy there once Oscar arrived. My cat’s favorite pastime was trying to catch the little fiends.
I brushed pieces of grass off my legs. “What about the cold feeling in my chest? Is that caused by my elemental power?”
“That I do not know.” She pursed her lips in thought for a moment. “We were unsure of how your body would react to the vampire blood it absorbed. This might be a side effect.”
“Great. I just hope I don’t wake up one of these mornings with a little vampire demon bursting out of my chest.”
“That is not how vampires are made.”
I shook my head and smiled at her bemused expression. “It was a joke.”
Aine scrunched up her nose and still somehow managed to look angelic. “Humor in this world is very strange.” She smoothed out the folds of her dress then laid her hands in her lap. “I did not come only to visit you, sister. If you had been raised among us, you would have learned all you needed to know about your magic by now. It is my duty to teach you what you need to know.”
My breath hitched in anticipation. “Like what?”
She stood and beckoned for me to follow her. We walked to the water’s edge, and she told me to wade into the lake. I did not question her; I pulled off my hiking boots and socks and rolled my jeans up to my knees. Then I stepped into the frigid water until it was halfway up my calves.
“I am a sylph so I can control the air and draw on its power. You are undine, which means you can do the same with water in any form. You can also communicate with any creature that lives in water. “
“What kind of creatures?” I peered at the glassy surface of the lake and tried to imagine what sorts of things could be down there. If Aine had not been with me, my overactive imagination would have sent me scrambling out of the water.
Aine smiled as if she had read my mind. “I promise you, you have nothing to fear from anything in this lake. Call to them and I will prove it to you.”
Curiosity overcame my nervousness. “How do I call them?”
“Send your magic out into the water and use it the way you would to summon an animal.”
“I don’t summon animals; I use my power to calm them.”
“It is the same thing.”
“Oh.” I called on my power, but instead of releasing it into the air, I let it flow from my feet into the water. Looking down, I gasped at the sparkling golden cloud spreading outwards through the water. It was like looking into a beautiful snow globe. “Wow! Do you see that?”
“Water not only strengthens you and deepens your magic, it also shows your magic’s true form,” Aine said softly.
I wiggled my toes and found the water around my feet to be a few degrees warmer than it had been when I stepped into the lake. I raised my eyes to Aine’s amused ones. “This is incredible!”
Something tickled my foot, and I stared down in surprise at the long speckled trout nibbling on my toes. It was joined by a second trout, then a third, and within a minute there were dozens of them swimming around my feet.
The water began to ripple a few yards away, and the trout darted away as something big approached. I stared in shock as it broke the surface and a long black head emerged from the water. Kelpie! I wanted to run, but my feet were rooted to the spot as the horse-like creature rose up to tower over me. It was midnight black with a long flowing mane and tail. My breath caught, and I took a step back when the kelpie looked me in the eye and began moving toward me.
“Do not be afraid, sister; you have nothing to fear. This is Feeorin. He and his brother, Fiannar, are guardians of the lakes and rivers in this valley, and they have watched over you since you moved here. Feeorin is very curious about you, and he comes to greet you.”
The kelpie stopped when its muzzle was inches from my head, and I could feel its hot breath on my face. Despite Aine’s assurances, I tensed, waiting for it to grab me and try to pull me beneath the surface and drown me, because that is what kelpies supposedly do. Seconds passed like hours until Feeorin bowed his head and nudged my shoulder gently. I looked back at Aine, who nodded at me. Then I reached up to touch his wide forehead. The kelpie snorted softly and butted me again until I began to stroke its face and neck.
“Hello, Feeorin.” My voice trembled in awe. I could not believe I was touching a real live kelpie. Two years ago, I’d helped Remy find medicine for a sick kelpie, but I hadn’t gone near the creature because of how dangerous they are to humans. Now I was standing here petting one.
Feeorin raised his head, and his large black eyes stared into mine for a long moment before he bowed again and returned to the lake. When the water reached his back, he gave a soft ninny and sank beneath the surface. I watched the spot where he had disappeared until the ripples stopped moving along the surface of the water.
“Kelpies do not linger long above water. That Feeorin stayed as long as he did is a sign of the esteem he has for you.” Aine practically glowed. “He recognized you as an undine, which means I was right; your Fae side is definitely stronger than your demon side.”
I did not ask her what would have happened if the kelpie hadn’t recognized me as Fae.
“Now it is time for you to learn to control water.” I must have made a face because she laughed. “Do not fret; we will start with something easy. I will show you how I make the air move, and then you can try it with the water.”
She went to stand beneath the trees, facing me. Then she raised a hand and moved it in a small circular motion. On the ground, leaves and twigs began to flutter and dance, forming a column that stretched upward toward her hand. “To do this you do not need to release your magic like you did to summon the water creatures. Water is your element so you simply draw on its power and then command it to do your bidding.”
Oh, is that all? “How do I do that?”
“Everything in nature has a life force, an energy that flows through it, and it is the same power you have inside you. If you look for that power outside instead of within yourself, you will find it.”
I did as she instructed and felt around outside my body for a power like mine. I knew what I was looking for and what it should feel like, but either I was doing it wrong or I could not draw on the power like she could. After a few minutes, I looked at her in defeat. “It’s not working.”
Aine pursed her lips and thought for a moment before her green eyes lit up. “You need more contact with the water. Sit in the lake and try again.”
“Sit in it? This water is freaking cold!”
“It is the only way,” she said, brushing aside my objections. “Once you do it a few times, you will need only to use a finger, but for now more of your body must touch the water.”
I just had to be a water elemental. I pulled off my hoodie and threw it on dry land – not that a dry hoodie was going to help much when my bottom half was soaked. Grimacing, I lowered my body until I was sitting in the cold lake with water lapping at my stomach. “C-can an undine g-get hypothermia?” I asked through chattering teeth.
Aine let out one of her musical laughs. “No, and the sooner you learn to draw on the water magic, the sooner it will warm you.”
That was all the motivation I needed. I laid my hands on my thighs beneath the water and began feeling for magic around me. It was hard not to reach for my own power, and to ignore the cold seeping into my bones. I pictured glowing energy infused with each water molecule, and then I imagined pulling all that warm energy toward me. I concentrated on only that, and after a few minutes, my imaginings grew so vivid that I no longer felt the cold.
“Look, sister!”
I didn’t realize I had closed my eyes until Aine spoke, and when I opened them, my gaze was drawn immediately to the soft glow outlining my body beneath the surface. My first thought was that I had accidently released my power – until I saw what had to be thousands of golden sparkles drifting through the water toward me like tiny underwater fireflies. Mesmerized, I watched the particles join the ones clinging to me and the golden aura around me grow brighter. I waved my right hand slowly through the water and saw with delight that the magic followed it. I also noticed that the water offered little resistance, and my hand might as well have been moving through the air. Mimicking Aine’s actions, I started moving my hand in a circular motion, and a dazzling spiral of magic formed in the water. I picked up speed until I had made a mini whirlpool, and then I lifted my hand from the water, still moving it in a circle. My eyes widened and I sucked in a sharp breath as a spinning column of water formed between my hand and the surface of the lake. I’m dreaming. I can’t really be doing this.
Clapping broke my concentration, and the tiny waterspout collapsed with a small splash. I looked over my shoulder at Aine, grinning so wide that my cheeks hurt. “Did I really do that?”
“Yes.” She walked to the water’s edge where I could see her better, and her face glowed with pride. “You are indeed Sahine’s progeny, and she would be so proud of you.”
“That was awesome! Can I do it again?”
“You may do it as many times as you wish” – her eyes gleamed with mischief – “if you are not too cold to continue.”
“Nope, I’m nice and toasty.” It was true. The water around me felt as warm as bathwater now, and I could sit in it all day.
Aine settled down on the shore and spread her skirts around her. “I’ll be here as long as you want to do this.”
For the next two hours, I played with the water, making bigger and bigger spouts and whirlpools, small waves that broke against the shore, and even a plume of water that rose ten feet in the air and sprinkled down on us like rain. I marveled over each new trick, still unable to believe that I was the one doing it. The best part was that I never tired because I was using the water’s power instead of my own. If only my Mori powers came to me as naturally as this.
It was with great reluctance that I finally stood and released the power around me. My hands were wrinkled and white from being in the water so long, and my dripping clothes clung to me as I joined Aine on the shore. It was going to be a cold walk home, but I didn’t care because I’d just had the most amazing afternoon and I was happier than I had been in a long time.
Aine came over to take my hands in hers. “You did very well today, sister.”
“It was unbelievable,” I said, struggling to come up with a better word to describe the experience.
“I am glad you enjoyed it. Now let’s take care of this.” She waved a hand and my clothes were instantly dry.
“That is a cool trick.” I sat down to pull on my socks and boots and saw that the sun had started dipping toward the west. “I wish I didn’t have to leave yet, but they will come looking for me if I don’t get back soon. When will I see you again?”
“When you have mastered your water magic, I will come back. I do not like to stay long in this world anymore.”
“You could visit me at home,” I said hopefully.
She smiled and shook her head. “It is safe for you to walk among the Mohiri because you are half demon. I am a full Fae, and it would cause chaos if I appeared among so many Mori demons.”
“What would happen?”
“They would be confused, afraid, and very angry. Most Mohiri go their entire lives without meeting a Fae, and they would not be able to handle their demons’ reaction to one. I do not think your people would be too happy about that.”
I winced at the thought of dozens of Mohiri warriors thrown into a Fae-induced rage. “No, definitely not.”
She hugged me. “I will see you soon, little sister,” she said stepping back. She smiled and waved, and just like that, she was gone.
The next time I see her, I gotta ask how she does that.
Running feet alerted me to the hounds approach. They were panting and happy like they had spent the afternoon running around instead of sitting by the lake. I felt a stab of guilt for having so much fun while they were in a dream state, but they did not look any worse for it. To make up for some of it, we spent another fifteen minutes at the lake before I told them it was time to go home. It was very unlikely we’d encounter anything this close to a Mohiri stronghold that two hellhounds could not handle.
When we walked out of the woods just before dusk, I spotted Nikolas and Chris standing near the main building, facing the woods, and I knew they were watching for my return. I was pretty sure that if I’d waited ten minutes longer before coming back, I would have met the two of them in the woods.
I was changing for dinner an hour later when I heard someone outside my door. When I went to see who it was, I found an envelope that had been slipped under the door. As soon as I picked it up, I recognized the stationary. Smiling, I unfolded the paper inside and read the message written in his elegant handwriting.
I would be pleased if you would join me for dinner at seven this evening in the library. Desmund.
I stared at the note for a long moment. Desmund was inviting me to dinner? The same Desmund who had thrown a fit when I trespassed in his library less than two weeks ago? It amazed me how much he had changed in such a short time. The night we met, I thought he was the most unreasonable person ever, and now I looked forward to spending time with him.
Music greeted me as I approached the library, and I recognized it from the Beethoven CD Desmund had sent me. Inside, there was no sign of him, but I found a small table set for two near the hearth and a side table holding several covered dishes that smelled amazing and made my stomach growl.
“Sara, I am glad you could make it. I was not sure if you had already made plans for this evening.”
I turned to greet Desmund, and I was so surprised by the change in his appearance that I almost forgot to speak. He was impeccably groomed and wearing brown trousers and a beige jacket, looking every bit the English noble. But it was not his attire that shocked me; it was the color in his complexion and the warm easy smile he gave me. He still looked ill but so much improved since the last time I’d seen him. Was it possible that the small healing a few nights ago had affected him like this?
“Well, I did have to turn down all my other invitations, but they’ll get over it,” I said when I had found my voice again.
His smile faltered. “Oh, I did not mean to make you cancel your plans for me.”
“Desmund, I’m kidding. If you hadn’t invited me to dinner, I would have come to see you tonight anyway. You owe me a checkers rematch, remember?”
I knew I’d said exactly the right thing when his mouth curved smugly and a gleam entered his dark eyes. “Indeed I do. Let us enjoy the meal the kitchen prepared for us, and then we shall have our rematch.”
He pulled out a chair for me, insisting that I sit while he served us since he was the host. He seemed to be enjoying himself so I obliged him even though I felt a little silly being catered to. I started to say he shouldn’t have gone through any trouble for me, but then I realized that he must have all his meals brought to him since he did not venture downstairs. I guessed that Tristan visited him sometimes, but still it had to be lonely eating alone up here most of the time.
“Here we are.” He laid a plate of lamb chops, rosemary potatoes, and vinaigrette salad in front of me then sat across from me with his own meal. It was a lot fancier than the food I normally ate, but I had a feeling it was standard fare for Desmund.
“Wine?” He held up a bottle of red wine, and I politely declined. “How are lessons with your new trainer?” he asked as he cut into his lamb chops.
“Better than I expected. I used my Mori strength to pick up a forty-pound weight with one hand this morning. I’ve never been able to do anything like that.” Desmund didn’t know anything about my Fae heritage, so I couldn’t tell him about the rest of my training.
“So working with Nikolas is not as bad as you had feared?”
“I guess not,” I admitted reluctantly. “He is helping me, even if I do still feel like clobbering him half the time.”
He laughed, and I was struck again by how different he seemed, relaxed and confident. I wished I could tell him about my incredible afternoon at the lake, but I still didn’t know him well enough to trust him with such a secret.
“Desmund, the last time I was here, you mentioned that you and Nikolas go way back and I got the impression you don’t like each other. Can I ask why?”
His expression became shuttered and I thought he was not going to answer. Then the ghost of a smile settled on his face. “Nikolas is one of the greatest warriors of this age, but there was a time when I held that distinction. I led hundreds of missions across Europe, and my kill rate was unmatched by anyone.
“I was leading a team to deal with a vampire problem in Glasgow when we encountered another team led by this upstart young Russian warrior, barely out of training. I told him we had the situation under control and he could turn around and go home, but young Nikolas did not take kindly to my words.” Desmund’s smile turned into a smirk. “Perhaps I said something about him not being old enough to leave his mother’s teat. Needless to say, we did not sit down to a drink together after the job was done.”
In the short time I had known Desmund I had already formed a picture of the arrogant and sardonic man he had been before the Hale witch attack. I could only just imagine the fireworks when he and Nikolas had butted heads, having had some firsthand experience with Nikolas.
“You two never got along because of that?”
Desmund chuckled. “Oh, that was nothing. We had a few other clashes over the next few years that were even better. It actually got quite boring over there when he decided to travel to America.”
I shook my head. “Somehow I doubt it ever got boring where you were.”
“True,” he replied with a cocky shrug. He took a sip of wine, and we ate quietly for a minute before he said he had heard about the excitement downstairs yesterday. After that I had to describe the whole kark incident in detail for him.
“I found out last night that I have a cousin here. Do you know Chris . . . Christian . . . um . . . shoot, I don’t even know his last name.”
“It is Kent, same as Tristan,” he supplied.
“I thought Tristan’s last name was Croix – like Madeline’s.”
Desmund scowled lightly. “Ah, Madeline. Never cared much for that one. I cannot conceive how a good man like Tristan could have sired a child as selfish and troublesome as her. Croix was her mother’s maiden name, and Madeline took it when she left here.”
“She hurt Tristan a lot when she left.” It was not a question; I saw flashes of hurt in Tristan’s eyes every time he mentioned her.
“Madeline was a fine warrior, but she thought that having Tristan as a father meant she was entitled to certain privileges and that she was above following the rules set down for everyone else. Tristan finally set her straight, and she ran off rather than change her ways. Too much like Elena, that one.”
“You knew Elena? Tristan told me what happened to her.”
There was no warmth in his laugh. “Tristan remembers Elena with the love of a brother and to him, she was spoiled and spirited, but good at heart. I remember her differently. Even at sixteen, Elena was a manipulative little thing, always scheming and trying to wrap every male she knew around her finger. Fortunately, her wiles did not work on me.”
“Why not?”
“She wasn’t my type.” He wore his usual smirk when he picked up his wine glass. I sensed there was a story behind that statement, but he wasn’t going to share it. I tried to imagine what he was like before he was attacked by the Hale witch. With his good looks and the charm I saw glimpses of, he must have been quite the ladies’ man.
“Have you ever been in love?” As soon as the question left my lips I wanted to take it back. He had suffered so much, and the last thing I wanted to do was remind him of a past love. “I’m sorry; I shouldn’t have asked you that.”
He set his wine glass on the table and stared at it like he was seeing into his past. “I was in love once or twice, or I thought I was. It was so long ago that I really can’t say anymore. What about you? Have you been in love?”
“No. I had a crush on a boy once but nothing happened. And there was a guy I liked a few months ago but . . . ”
“He did not return your affection?”
I toyed with my fork. “We had one date – if you could call it that – and he wanted to go out again, but I’d just found out what I was and I didn’t think it was right to start a relationship with a human.”
Desmund nodded in understanding and thankfully did not push the subject. He laid his utensils across his plate. “I am sorry that I forgot to ask for a dessert. I don’t usually eat them myself.”
“That’s okay. I probably couldn’t eat much more anyway.” I pushed back my chair and stood. “Why don’t we have that rematch instead?”
A familiar gleam entered his eyes. “With pleasure.”
We walked over to the small table by the window, and I found a game already set up on the board I had left for him the last time I was here. We sat across from each other, neither of us saying anything about the new board or the fate of the old one. There was a lot I still didn’t know about Desmund’s illness, and it was possible that he did not remember thrashing the library. He was doing so well tonight, and the last thing I wanted to do was upset him by bringing up something so unpleasant.
Two games later, three things were very clear to me. The first was that I would never defeat Desmund in checkers. The second was that the more I got to know him, the happier I was to have him as a friend. The third was that his health had not improved as much as I’d thought. After several hours together, he began to show signs of strain: his eyes grew overly bright, and though he kept smiling, he could not hide the tremble in his hands when he reached for his checkers. I realized what an effort it must be for him to hide his constant pain and inner turmoil for so long. He chose to stay up here, shut off from almost everyone else, not because he did not like people, but because it was too hard to conceal his condition. He was a proud man who had once been a great warrior, and it must be agony for him to endure this weakness of his mind and body.
I had no way to know if my healing had done him any good, but I wanted to try it again. The problem was that I couldn’t just reach over and take his hand or touch his arm without giving him the wrong idea. All I needed was for Desmund to think I was hitting on him. Talk about the last person who should be getting mixed signals.
“Another match?”
“Actually, I’d love to hear you play the piano again – if you want to, that is.” He’d gotten so wrapped up in his music the last time that I’d been able to do a healing without his being any the wiser. Maybe I could do it again.
Some of the weariness left his face. “What would you like to hear?”
“Surprise me.”
He stood and held out his arm. I took it, and we went down the hall to the music room. We sat together on the bench, and Desmund began to play a darker piece full of dramatic sweeps that seemed to echo his emotional state. It wasn’t anything I’d heard before and I found it a bit depressing, but he lost himself in the music, which made it possible for me to do my thing.
This time when I opened myself to the Hale witch’s magic, I was ready for the cold blast of nausea that hit me. Gritting my teeth, I braced myself and drew the dark magic into me until sweat trickled down my back and I was fighting the shivers that tried to wrack my body. When I could take no more, I discreetly pulled away and let my power burn away the witch’s magic.
Desmund finished the piece and started another, oblivious to the silent battle being fought beside him. As soon as my heart rate slowed to normal, I formed the connection between us again and siphoned more magic from him. At first, the magic flowed in a steady stream that seemed never-ending, but it eventually began to slow until it was little more than a trickle. Using so much of my power to destroy the foul magic should have exhausted me, but I felt strangely invigorated after my afternoon in the lake.
Desmund played two more pieces before I saw that he was tiring. There was definitely more color in his cheeks again, but it occurred to me he was probably beginning to feel the same lethargy that most creatures experience after a big healing. Not that he would ever admit to being tired.
I put up my hand to cover a fake yawn, and he stopped playing. “Sleepy, little one?”
“Sorry, all this training has me beat.”
“Then you should retire and get some rest. We can continue this another time.” He stood and smiled down at me. “Come. You must get plenty of rest if you are going to keep up with your new trainer.”
We parted at the landing as usual, and I took a detour to the dining hall for a blueberry muffin before heading to my room. As I passed the tall windows, I spotted Nikolas and Celine walking across the well-lit lawn. They stopped and Celine gazed up at Nikolas with a sultry smile. He said something to her and her lips parted in what I knew was a throaty laugh, making me feel like I was intruding on a private moment. Seeing them like this, I couldn’t help but notice how good they looked together, and I wasn’t surprised that Nikolas would want to be with the beautiful woman. She might be a bitch to other females, but obviously males were very attracted to her.
Celine reached up and put her hand intimately on Nikolas’s shoulder, and I felt like someone had socked me in the gut. I pulled back out of sight before either of them could see me and ran from the room, embarrassed and confused by a host of strange emotions. Why did it bother me to see them together? It wasn’t as if there was anything between me and Nikolas; he was probably the last person I could picture myself with. Yes, he was gorgeous, and okay, maybe I was a little attracted to him. Who wouldn’t be? He was good to me, but he was also arrogant and bossy and moody.
I just couldn’t stand the thought of that awful woman getting her claws into him. He can do so much better than Celine.
What do you care? my inner voice asked. You don’t even like him, remember?
I do like him, I argued back. He’s my friend, and I wouldn’t want one of my friends with someone like that.
Who the hell are you trying to kid? You have never thought of Nikolas as just a friend.
“No, you’re wrong,” I whispered as I opened my door. “I don’t care about him that way.”
Liar.
I closed the door and pressed my forehead weakly against it. “This is not happening.”
The voice did not say a word.